# Could you have a satisfying sex life with a partner who would only do oral & manual? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 3, 2010, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-have-a-satisfying-sex-life-with-a-partner-who-would-only-do-oral-manual/562829 "2010-12-03T16:57:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2010, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-have-a-satisfying-sex-life-with-a-partner-who-would-only-do-oral-manual/562829/21 "2010-12-03T19:48:32Z")
> [@Peeta\_Mellark](#): > > Besides, if someone is particularly skilled at oral I’ve found it to be even better than intercourse. Yes, I find this nearly all of the time. Intercourse is great for feeling close, but when I want to pop off I want a mouth or hand. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2010, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-have-a-satisfying-sex-life-with-a-partner-who-would-only-do-oral-manual/562829/22 "2010-12-03T19:52:21Z")
Eh, I went years getting neither pussy nor mouth, so there’s been plenty of time in my life when the proposed offering would have been an upgrade. ---
**Author:** ![Dogzilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@Dogzilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dogzilla)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2010, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-have-a-satisfying-sex-life-with-a-partner-who-would-only-do-oral-manual/562829/23 "2010-12-03T20:07:59Z")
Nope. Gotta have the penis. When I’m getting off, I like to have something in there to clamp down on. :: blush :: TMI? ---
**Author:** ![missred](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/missred/32/14096_2.png) [@missred](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/missred)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2010, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-have-a-satisfying-sex-life-with-a-partner-who-would-only-do-oral-manual/562829/24 "2010-12-03T20:32:23Z")
I’ve been there. As good as oral and manual were, frankly, the little blue pills were a relationship saver. missred (f) ---
**Author:** ![runcible\_spoon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9fc29f/32.png) [@runcible\_spoon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/runcible_spoon)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2010, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-have-a-satisfying-sex-life-with-a-partner-who-would-only-do-oral-manual/562829/25 "2010-12-03T22:07:33Z")
Nope. I rarely get off from oral, and no offense, darling, but I’m better with my hands than you are. Either is just foreplay, as far as I’m concerned. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2010, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-have-a-satisfying-sex-life-with-a-partner-who-would-only-do-oral-manual/562829/26 "2010-12-04T00:12:58Z")
The OP describes the relationship I’ve happily been in for 23 years . . . except the “both give and receive” part. Some people are gifted “givers” and some people are gifted “takers.” ---
**Author:** ![Not\_a\_Platypus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/d26b3c/32.png) [@Not\_a\_Platypus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Not_a_Platypus)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2010, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-have-a-satisfying-sex-life-with-a-partner-who-would-only-do-oral-manual/562829/27 "2010-12-04T00:16:28Z")
It’d be good, but not satisfying. ---
**Author:** ![LouisB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@LouisB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LouisB)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2010, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-have-a-satisfying-sex-life-with-a-partner-who-would-only-do-oral-manual/562829/28 "2010-12-04T00:55:42Z")
While I voted yes I think my partners satisfaction would have to be considered. If oral/manual was satisfying to her, it would be to me; if not satisfying for her, it wouldn’t be for me either. Sex is a two-way street. ---
**Author:** ![StusBlues](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@StusBlues](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StusBlues)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2010, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-have-a-satisfying-sex-life-with-a-partner-who-would-only-do-oral-manual/562829/29 "2010-12-04T04:28:41Z")
> [@Dogzilla](#): > > Nope. Gotta have the penis. When I’m getting off, I like to have something in there to clamp down on. :: blush :: TMI? Nope. Good perspective. With the woman I’m with right now, I do a lot better job hitting that “special place” with my fingers than I do with my manroot, so she far prefers my more dexterious appendages. Takes all kinds–every woman is different. ---
**Author:** ![Cubsfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Cubsfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cubsfan)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2010, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-have-a-satisfying-sex-life-with-a-partner-who-would-only-do-oral-manual/562829/30 "2010-12-04T05:05:00Z")
As long as manual included foot jobs then yes. ---
**Author:** ![Grumman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/43a26b/32.png) [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2010, 5:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-have-a-satisfying-sex-life-with-a-partner-who-would-only-do-oral-manual/562829/31 "2010-12-04T05:46:10Z")
I’d be fine with it. I’d actually rather give than receive anyway. ---
**Author:** ![scootergirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e99b99/32.png) [@scootergirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scootergirl)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2010, 6:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-have-a-satisfying-sex-life-with-a-partner-who-would-only-do-oral-manual/562829/32 "2010-12-04T06:51:24Z")
No…absolutely no. ---
**Author:** ![sitchensis](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sitchensis/32/4892_2.png) [@sitchensis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sitchensis)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2010, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-have-a-satisfying-sex-life-with-a-partner-who-would-only-do-oral-manual/562829/33 "2010-12-04T07:01:17Z")
Where does anal fall into this? I’m not saying it has to be a regular part of our relationship but at least once a year I would like it if you at least tried it. I voted “possibly” I would enjoy it for the most part, but we would have to be a little adventurous in the other things we did to make it feel like I wasn’t just jerking off with your mouth. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2010, 7:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-have-a-satisfying-sex-life-with-a-partner-who-would-only-do-oral-manual/562829/34 "2010-12-04T07:28:11Z")
I honestly don’t see why not. Can someone explain to me what PIV has over other forms of sex? I can’t really think of anything that would be physically different (at least, for guys). So is it some emotional thing? And, honestly, solo sex is about 80% satisfying anyways–it’s the emotional intimacy that causes me to look for someone. ---
**Author:** ![anya\_marie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ebca7d/32.png) [@anya\_marie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anya_marie)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2010, 8:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-have-a-satisfying-sex-life-with-a-partner-who-would-only-do-oral-manual/562829/35 "2010-12-04T08:24:13Z")
If this is a temporary solution to a temporary problem I could go for it. ---
**Author:** ![SanVito](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sanvito/32/2805_2.png) [@SanVito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SanVito)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2010, 9:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-have-a-satisfying-sex-life-with-a-partner-who-would-only-do-oral-manual/562829/36 "2010-12-04T09:23:13Z")
Absolutely yes, but then I am a gay woman. And whilst we do occasionally engage in the strap on (have I got all the boys’ attention now?), it’s mainly reserved as a sideshow for those ‘let’s stay in bed all afternoon and work our way through the karma sutra’ occasions. I could easily live without it and still be quite satisfied, TYVM. ---
**Author:** ![SciFiSam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/47e85d/32.png) [@SciFiSam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SciFiSam)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2010, 9:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-have-a-satisfying-sex-life-with-a-partner-who-would-only-do-oral-manual/562829/37 "2010-12-04T09:27:14Z")
Yup - another lesbian here, so there’s never any penile penetration involved anyway. Silly Skald, forgetting us! ---
**Author:** ![outlierrn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/outlierrn/32/3005_2.png) [@outlierrn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/outlierrn)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2010, 9:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-have-a-satisfying-sex-life-with-a-partner-who-would-only-do-oral-manual/562829/38 "2010-12-04T09:49:00Z")
It would depend on the reason, I would consider that sub-optimal, but not an absolute deal breaker. Of course I might find out I was wrong. ---
**Author:** ![DianaG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7ab992/32.png) [@DianaG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DianaG)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2010, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-have-a-satisfying-sex-life-with-a-partner-who-would-only-do-oral-manual/562829/39 "2010-12-04T14:16:08Z")
Geez, I wake up, I check the Dope, and the first two ideas I’m confronted with are John McCain and Sarah Palin having sex, and never having sex again. The former made me, for a moment, inclined to consider the latter. As others have mentioned, I’d be okay with it as a temporary thing, but I would have to love someone very, very much to accept it as a permanent condition of a relationship. I think I might also have to be old enough that “the rest of my life” is probably not that long, because to me no fucking is a pretty serious deprivation, and I need an end in sight. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2010, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-have-a-satisfying-sex-life-with-a-partner-who-would-only-do-oral-manual/562829/40 "2010-12-04T14:20:11Z")
> [@Dogzilla](#): > > Nope. Gotta have the penis. When I’m getting off, I like to have something in there to clamp down on. :: blush :: TMI? _ahem_ It’s not just lesbians who can play with toys, y’know. Just sayin’… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-have-a-satisfying-sex-life-with-a-partner-who-would-only-do-oral-manual/562829.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-have-a-satisfying-sex-life-with-a-partner-who-would-only-do-oral-manual/562829.md?page=3)