# Countdown to colonoscopy! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 31, 2015, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-colonoscopy/711396 "2015-01-31T01:55:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2015, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-colonoscopy/711396/1 "2015-01-31T01:55:18Z")
Well, I should have had this done a couple of years ago, but here we go. Next Thursday I go in for the scope. I didn’t realize that I need to start modifying my diet on Monday, and that by Wednesday I’m basically living on Gatorade, broth and laxatives. Research indicates I should basically plan on living on the toilet by that point. Luckily I don’t really have a problem skipping meals. Luckily I can eat white bread, boiled eggs, canned salmon and vegetable soup for a couple of days. Updates daily starting Monday. I know you can’t wait! ---
**Author:** ![China\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/779978/32.png) [@China\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/China_Guy)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2015, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-colonoscopy/711396/2 "2015-01-31T03:21:23Z")
Do you have to drink the cleanser Golytely? Something like 4 liters in an hour of just absolutely vile stuff along with the laxative. You basically sit on the head and occasionally get off to fill up the glass with the liquid and by the end are gagging it down. Whew, let’s just say I don’t understand why some folks want to go for a colonic irrigation… The actual procedure is a piece of piss. In my case, they gave me a roofie, and I woke up with a vaguely unsettled feeling. ---
**Author:** ![johnpost](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f17d59/32.png) [@johnpost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/johnpost)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2015, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-colonoscopy/711396/3 "2015-01-31T03:33:45Z")
ask for a copy of the vid. places have different diets and preps. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2015, 3:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-colonoscopy/711396/4 "2015-01-31T03:55:35Z")
I have a few laxatives prescribed: Dulcolax tablets, and/or Pico-Salax or Purg-Odan. They sound lovely, don’t they? ---
**Author:** ![P-man](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/p-man/32/3606_2.png) [@P-man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/P-man)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2015, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-colonoscopy/711396/5 "2015-01-31T03:56:31Z")
My doc told me I need to have one. I’m waiting until the summer, since I work in a school. ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2015, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-colonoscopy/711396/6 "2015-01-31T04:12:05Z")
As ever-popular as this perennial topic is, it looks like it’s been about 6 months since the last colonoscopy thread (unless I’ve missed one). So I’ll go ahead and re-post the entire (updated!) reading list again: [I had a colonoscopy on monday.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=361018) ( **A.R. Cane** 03-01-2006 ) [What to do with my colonoscopy pictures?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=382856) ( **KlondikeGeoff** 08-06-2006 ) [Help interpret my colonoscopy report](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=398134) ( **Sycorax** 11-29-2006 ) [Should a colonoscopy have hurt this much?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=400763) ( **lisacurl** 12-19-2006 ) [Fleet’s Phosphosoda (TMI)](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=406324) ( **black rabbit** 01-30-2007 ) (Note: As I’ve mentioned above, I found Phospho-Soda to be totally comfortable to use. Alas, it’s fallen into disfavor and is no longer available.) [Ask the Man Who Had a Colonoscopy](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=416276) ( **kunilou** 04-11-2007 ) [What to expect for a colonoscopy? (TMI)](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=420894) ( **Incubus** 05-14-2007 ) [Why is a colonoscopy being done at Camp David?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=429728) ( **Fear Itself** 07-21-2007 ) (Note: Numerous threads at about this time speculating on Bush’s colonoscopy. Will they find the Constitution and Bill of Rights up there? What will Acting-Pres. Cheney do during his hour in power? Trying to distinguish real news from Onion article.) [Best Laxative?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=440801) ( **Red Barchetta** 10-19-2007 ) [Rise of the Machines: Anal Probing Robot](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=449442) ( **Tuckerfan** 12-29-2007 ) [Aetna’s New Colonoscopy Policy? Ouch!](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=450334) ( **Jinx** 01-05-2008 ) [Colon removal as cancer prevention?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=455264) ( **Kinthalis** 02-11-2008 ) [The Picolax Thread](http://singletrackworld.com/2009/02/the-picolax-thread-returns/) [Apparently a classic colonoscopy thread from the Singletrack message board.] Obligatory link to classic Dave Barry column: [Dave Barry: A journey into my colon – and yours](http://www.miamiherald.com/2009/02/11/v-fullstory/427603/dave-barry-a-journey-into-my-colon.html) (Miami Herald, orig. publ. 02-22-2008) (ETA: Link defunct now. 01/30/2015. I’ll see if I can find it somewhere else.) [Colonoscopy-Not great news](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=462010) ( **Mint Julep** 04-01-2008 ) [Get a colonoscopy if you are 50](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=463187) ( **Lillith Fair** 04-09-2008 ) [Ask the guy who just had a colonsocopy](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=466228) ( **Eutychus** 05-01-2008x ) [Colonoscopies & Cosmetics](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=470065) ( **KittenKat** 05-31-2008 ) [Journey to the Center of My Colon…](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=475627) ( **Shodan** 07-15-2008 ) [Homer Simpson’s colonoscopy](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=482024) ( **mobo85** 09-06-2008 ) [Dave Barry colonoscopy journal - humorous PSA](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=485412) ( **pinkyvee** 09-28-2008 ) [Clear liquid diet, one gallon of laxative, colonoscopy - TMI](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=485782) ( **beckwall** 09-30-2008 ) [Making the most of a forced bowel cleanse](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=487042) ( **What the … !!!** 10-09-2008 ) [To boldly Go where no Vet has gone before. Gorilla + Colonoscopy. Newslink](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=491659) ( **Bosda Di’Chi of Tricor** 11-06-2008 ) [Well, the HalfLytely is kicking in…](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=493217) ( **ivylass** 11-16-2008 ) [It’s Roto-Rooter time again…whine](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=500124) ( **Clothahump** 01-03-2009 ) [Colonoscopy - routine or only when symptoms are present?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=503544) ( **Carol the Impaler** 01-25-2009 ) [HalfLytely vs Phospho-Soda](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=504910) ( **crazyjoe** 02-03-2009 ) [Ask yesterday’s colonoscopy recipient](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=515410) ( **Boyo Jim** 04-25-2009 ) [So, ever been through colonoscopy prep?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=547726) ( **EddyTeddyFreddy** 01-13-2010 ) [What’s the poop on CT Colonography?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=557823) ( **teela brown** 03-30-2010 ) [Colonoscopy Baby](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=562523) ( **Cicero** 05-09-2010 ) [Your favorite colonoscopy prep regimen? (need answer fast)](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=566221) ( **Mama Zappa** 06-07-2010 ) [Ask the Man Who Had a Colonoscopy - the Sequel](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=575251) ( **kunilou** 08-20-2010 ) [Tell me about your colonoscopy, especially the prep experience](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=577994) ( **Stoid** 09-12-2010 ) [Whatever you do, don’t fart. TMI!!](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=608935) ( **kambuckta** 05-18-2011 ) [Ooooohhh - My First Colonoscopy!](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=619388) ( **Atomic Mama** 08-07-2011 ) [Ever Have A High Colonic?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=619547) ( **Quasimodem** 08-08-2011 ) [Includes tangential discussion of colonoscopies.] [Does Miso Soup Count?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=623395) ( **Atomic Mama** 09-07-2011 ) [Going for a colonoscopy - what’s it like?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=636960) ( **AaronX** 01-01-2012 ) [Colonoscopy while conscious: what’s the discomfort?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=637350) ( **Machine Elf** 01-04-2012 ) [Colonoscopy advice](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=642546) ( **Ibanez** 02-18-2012 ) [Having a colonoscopy](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=650070) ( **Surly Chick** 04-29-2012 ) [[TMI] Had that colonoscopy 2 weeks ago, and now my ejaculate volume is way down. Normal?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=651180) ( **John DiFool** 05-09-2012 ) [How soon does Dulcolax work? Requesting TMI pre-colonoscopy.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=663471) ( **Napier** 08-27-2012 ) [Need colonoscopy jokes!!](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=669964) ( **Mama Zappa** 10-25-2012 ) [What would happen if…](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=672626) ( **CheeseDonkey** 11-17-2012 ) [Mixing laxatives and anti-diarrheal meds, with side-discussion of colonoscopy prep.] [Tell me about your colonoscopy](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=684967) ( **tdn** 03-12-2013 ) [colon cancer and colonoscopies](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=689360) ( **Machine Elf** 04-27-2013 ) [Colonoscopies](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=16315966#post16315966) ( **john b.** 05/23/2013 ) [Good news for colonoscopy prep!](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=696074) ( **Mama Zappa** 07/09/2013 ) [Colonoscopy in a week](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=703563) ( **Ike Witt** 9/30/2013 ) [Another Colonoscopy Thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=709612) ( **Siam Sam** 12-05-2013 ) [It’s been two months - time for another Colonoscopy Thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=719221) ( **Mauvaise** 03/25/2014 ) [Welcome to 50 - here’s your colonoscopy kit](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=725122) ( **Telemark** 06/03/2014 ) [Countdown to colonoscopy!](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=747908) ( **Leaffan** 01/30/2015 ) ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2015, 4:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-colonoscopy/711396/7 "2015-01-31T04:16:25Z")
HOLY SHIT! I…had …no …idea. ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2015, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-colonoscopy/711396/8 "2015-01-31T04:20:48Z")
(Missed 2nd edit window above.) Here’s a current link to Dave Barry’s classic column. [Dave Barry: A journey into my colon – and yours](http://www.miamiherald.com/living/liv-columns-blogs/dave-barry/article1928847.html), Dave Barry, Miami Herald, orig. pub. Feb. 22, 2008. ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2015, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-colonoscopy/711396/9 "2015-01-31T04:32:47Z")
> [@Senegoid](#): > > [Dave Barry colonoscopy journal - humorous PSA](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=485412) ( **pinkyvee** 09-28-2008 ) The above OP contains a link to another Dave Barry article that also seems to be obsolete, but here are a few other living links that appear to be copies of the same: [http://forum.woodenboat.com/showthread.php?121786-colonoscopy-Dave-Barry](http://forum.woodenboat.com/showthread.php?121786-colonoscopy-Dave-Barry) [http://www.irv2.com/forums/f34/my-colonoscopy-journal-very-funny-106787.html](http://www.irv2.com/forums/f34/my-colonoscopy-journal-very-funny-106787.html) [http://www.oldpremeds.org/fusionbb/showtopic.php?tid/41418/](http://www.oldpremeds.org/fusionbb/showtopic.php?tid/41418/) ---
**Author:** ![notsoheavyd3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/85e7bf/32.png) [@notsoheavyd3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/notsoheavyd3)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2015, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-colonoscopy/711396/10 "2015-01-31T04:54:17Z")
Biggest piece of advice I can give, after you take the laxative if you need to do ANYTHING butt related do it on the toilet. (I don’t know who told me that but it saved me a huge embarrassment. I felt like I had to break wind but thought better of it and went on the toilet to do it. Yeah, it wasn’t flatulence.) Oh the 2 worst parts are of course the prep before the colonoscopy and the damn bill afterwards. (What do you mean it’s not a screen, it’s medical so I have to pay? Oh and damn does the anesthesiologist charge a lot.) ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2015, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-colonoscopy/711396/11 "2015-01-31T06:03:52Z")
It’ll be fine. I was anxious because I’d never had any procedure before, and now I have no concerns about the next one. Hold your nose if you don’t like the taste of the prep. Get some wet wipes. I asked for twilight rather than knock-out anesthesia and it was very cool to watch it all on the screen. ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2015, 12:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-colonoscopy/711396/12 "2015-01-31T12:19:19Z")
My advice is that you take to heart and follow the advice you are given when you are released. They will tell you to not do much, lay low, take it easy for a day or more. You should take that advice even if you feel perfectly fine and well. My Mr did not. He felt well, doesn’t like lying about not doing anything if he feels well, etc. So, of course, he was up and about and doing things around the house. Not hard or difficult things, just the normal bending, a little light lifting, etc. Things any of us would do without a second thought! He paid for it over the next 48hrs though. Something he could have avoided had he followed their advice I suspect. Good Luck! ---
**Author:** ![teela\_brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d9b06d/32.png) [@teela\_brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teela_brown)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2015, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-colonoscopy/711396/13 "2015-01-31T14:56:06Z")
I’m going to go the [Cologuard](http://www.webmd.com/colorectal-cancer/news/20140813/new-colon-cancer-test) route next time. It’s brand-new. It’s a simple at-home poop test that looks for the DNA present when you have polyps. No drinking that gaggy prep stuff and no taking two days off and looking for a ride. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2015, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-colonoscopy/711396/14 "2015-01-31T15:14:28Z")
> [@elbows](#): > > My advice is that you take to heart and follow the advice you are given when you are released. They will tell you to not do much, lay low, take it easy for a day or more. You should take that advice even if you feel perfectly fine and well. My Mr did not. He felt well, doesn’t like lying about not doing anything if he feels well, etc. So, of course, he was up and about and doing things around the house. Not hard or difficult things, just the normal bending, a little light lifting, etc. Things any of us would do without a second thought! He paid for it over the next 48hrs though. Something he could have avoided had he followed their advice I suspect. > > Good Luck! In which way did he pay for it? I have an office job and meetings to attend the day after. Should I not attend those meetings? ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2015, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-colonoscopy/711396/15 "2015-01-31T15:16:04Z")
> [@notsoheavyd3](#): > > Biggest piece of advice I can give, after you take the laxative if you need to do ANYTHING butt related do it on the toilet. (I don’t know who told me that but it saved me a huge embarrassment. I felt like I had to break wind but thought better of it and went on the toilet to do it. Yeah, it wasn’t flatulence.) > > Oh the 2 worst parts are of course the prep before the colonoscopy and the damn bill afterwards. (What do you mean it’s not a screen, it’s medical so I have to pay? Oh and damn does the anesthesiologist charge a lot.) No charge for me in Canada. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Honey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/honey/32/5074_2.png) [@Honey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Honey)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2015, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-colonoscopy/711396/16 "2015-01-31T15:37:52Z")
My fool ex-husband asked to be given no drugs, since he didn’t have someone to give him a ride home after the procedure (he didn’t ask me). He got no more than a minute or two into it, and that was it…done. The next time, which was just last week, I drove him there, waited, and drove him home afterward. Good drugs, no memory and no pain. My advice? Get some magazines for the bathroom. You’ll be living in there. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Lorene89095](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@Lorene89095](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lorene89095)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2015, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-colonoscopy/711396/17 "2015-01-31T17:25:43Z")
Vaseline - use on the toilet paper after every BM/flood. I’m glad you’re getting it… First one I had,BINGO,stage 4 colon cancer… I’m doing well,thank you, 6 years after all the drama. ---
**Author:** ![johnpost](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f17d59/32.png) [@johnpost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/johnpost)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2015, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-colonoscopy/711396/18 "2015-01-31T21:15:25Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > In which way did he pay for it? I have an office job and meetings to attend the day after. Should I not attend those meetings? start re-hydrating yourself after it is done. you’ll be good. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2015, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-colonoscopy/711396/19 "2015-02-01T00:07:46Z")
Picked up the meds today. Normal eating for today and tomorrow, but restrictions start Monday. Thank God for wings and beer for the Superbowl tomorrow! ---
**Author:** ![Napier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ce73a5/32.png) [@Napier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Napier)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2015, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-colonoscopy/711396/20 "2015-02-01T00:15:01Z")
Leaffan, if you want to hear about my unfortunate colonoscopy of a couple years back, lemme know. Bur if you’re not the one asking, I’m not going to tarnish your thread with it. If it matters, I still think colonoscopies are important to do. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-colonoscopy/711396.md?page=2)