# Countdown to the States!! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 13, 2000, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-the-states/29217 "2000-08-13T22:03:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![SouthernStyle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b3f665/32.png) [@SouthernStyle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SouthernStyle)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2000, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-the-states/29217/81 "2000-08-17T20:58:51Z")
**Falc** , I need a cold one. Now. :: Grabs birdie by the bum :: ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2000, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-the-states/29217/82 "2000-08-17T20:59:04Z")
_smacks Chief’s arm_ Go get it yourself, sailorboy. ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2000, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-the-states/29217/83 "2000-08-17T21:00:24Z")
_smacks Southern on the arm as well_ Wonderful. Then you can grab me a cold one as well. I prefer Killian’s. ---
**Author:** ![ChiefScott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@ChiefScott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChiefScott)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2000, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-the-states/29217/84 "2000-08-17T21:06:06Z")
Somebody’s gettin’ short sheeted at the Marriott! And see if I buy the first round for everyone now! You better apologize profusely, birdie, and skiddadle into the kitchen and bring me back a lager toot sweet! Ya don’t want 18 thirsty Dopers remembering next week that the Chief would’ve bought them all their first drinks if you’d only submitted to me. ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2000, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-the-states/29217/85 "2000-08-17T21:10:30Z")
Chief hon…_I_ was gonna buy first round. So yer threat’s not really working. You can still buy second. But if you think I’m gonna go get you a beer because you told me to…you better think again, sailorboy. _sits back, relaxing in chair_ ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2000, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-the-states/29217/86 "2000-08-17T21:12:19Z")
Oh, and another thing… TOLD YOU I wasn’t easily tamed! ---
**Author:** ![ChiefScott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@ChiefScott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChiefScott)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2000, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-the-states/29217/87 "2000-08-17T21:27:23Z")
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. ::Grumble grumble:: Defend the damn country for six months. Don’t even get to see an available woman let alone screw one. 120 degree heat. No port call in more than 2 weeks. Less thn 150 miles from home ad gotta spend yet another night out here at sea. My son’s already in Norfolk waiting for me. And all I ask for is a lousy beer. What do I get? Attitude. Thanks a lot. ---
**Author:** ![ChiefScott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@ChiefScott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChiefScott)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2000, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-the-states/29217/88 "2000-08-17T22:04:55Z")
16 hours to go! Still no beer. Not even one in the offing. ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2000, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-the-states/29217/89 "2000-08-17T22:08:46Z")
Oh FINE. _brings **ChiefScott** a beer. Without using her hands._ 🙂 Better now, Scott? ---
**Author:** ![purrplebear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/90ced4/32.png) [@purrplebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purrplebear)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2000, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-the-states/29217/90 "2000-08-17T22:17:39Z")
Slipping in again, purplebear quietly hands the Chief a long, tall cold one \ and then hands one to SS as well. See, this way, Falcon won’t have to serve you, and you’ll still be guessing as to her intentions…😃 \ And, Chief, don’t forget I’m married, and Mr Bear has access to Nukes too! I’ll have to pass on the ‘offer’ I’m afraid. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Padeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@Padeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Padeye)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2000, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-the-states/29217/91 "2000-08-17T22:33:18Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Falcon \* > \*\*O_brings **ChiefScott** a beer. Without using her hands.\* > \*\* You shoulda posted that picture on the SD People Pages. Welcome back ChiefScott. I know how it can be waiting to get off the damn boat but the last time I did I had to wait until the E-5s got to go. Two weeks with no port call? You poor **baby**! Rofl. Goddamn '83 ranger cruise had more than 17 weeks between port calls. ---
**Author:** ![ChiefScott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@ChiefScott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChiefScott)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2000, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-the-states/29217/92 "2000-08-17T22:51:04Z")
Too late, **bear**. She’s been broken. Thanks, **Falc**. I didn’t know you could use those lovelies as a beer coozy too! Now get upstairs and get naked. I’ll be up when I finish my brew! _Gentlemen of the Message Board, please note: Guilt can be your strongest weapon when properly and sparingly implemented. This lesson brought to you by the Chief._ 15 1/4 hours! ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2000, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-the-states/29217/93 "2000-08-17T23:09:52Z")
_knocks beer out of Chief’s hand, spilling it_ No hon. You’ll come up NOW. Got it? _smiles, then thinks…she’s broken, my ass…_ ---
**Author:** ![ChiefScott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@ChiefScott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChiefScott)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2000, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-the-states/29217/94 "2000-08-17T23:54:30Z")
Too late. You already got one and handed it to me… er, breasted it to me. ---
**Author:** ![ChiefScott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@ChiefScott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChiefScott)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2000, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-the-states/29217/95 "2000-08-18T00:52:41Z")
At nine p.m. eastern daylight time – 13 hours to go!!! And **Falcon** ’s a beaten woman! ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2000, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-the-states/29217/96 "2000-08-18T00:55:39Z")
And that proves WHAT exactly, hon? That you can guilt-trip me? Now get moving, sailor. _smacks **Chief** on the butt_ ---
**Author:** ![ChiefScott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@ChiefScott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChiefScott)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2000, 10:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-the-states/29217/97 "2000-08-18T10:06:05Z")
Four flipping hours to go!! Maneuvering to enter the Chesapeake shipping channel. ---
**Author:** ![ChiefScott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@ChiefScott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChiefScott)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2000, 11:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-the-states/29217/98 "2000-08-18T11:04:28Z")
Three **freakin’** hours!! Is there anyone wanting to celebrate w/me? ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2000, 11:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-the-states/29217/99 "2000-08-18T11:13:07Z")
\ Welcome home, Chief! sheesh, sailors… hehehehe ---
**Author:** ![ChiefScott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@ChiefScott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChiefScott)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2000, 12:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-the-states/29217/100 "2000-08-18T12:03:18Z")
Two hours!!! About to cross over the Bay Bridge-Tunnel! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-the-states/29217.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/countdown-to-the-states/29217.md?page=6)