# Cousins **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 27, 2011, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cousins/587075 "2011-06-27T23:27:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![YaraMateo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/58f4c7/32.png) [@YaraMateo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YaraMateo)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2011, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cousins/587075/41 "2011-06-29T01:25:04Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > In my family cousins are described as siblings that you can marry, but I honestly have no idea how many cousins I have there are so many. It’s like it’s the job of the old people when they retire from full time to work to keep track of everybody and how they are related. That said, it is actually possible to show up at one of my family’s doorsteps and receive food, clothes, money, etc., even though no one has ever met you as long as you can correctly describe your relationship to the family. This how it works on my dad’s side. If someone comes here or I go to their country, we let them stay with us. As far as I know, my one cousin was staying with my uncle for a year rent free. He went back around March. ---
**Author:** ![missred](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/missred/32/14096_2.png) [@missred](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/missred)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2011, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cousins/587075/42 "2011-06-29T01:57:26Z")
I have 43 first cousins, including three who are on both sides of the family (like **Skald** , my mom’s sister married my dad’s brother). I’m one of the younger cousins on Dad’s side. I haven’t seen some of my older cousins since my granddad passed in '83 and likely couldn’t pick them out of a line-up. Some of the younger ones (around my age) who haven’t moved away, I see occasionally when I go up to visit the folks. I’m in the younger-middle group on Mom’s side. I have first cousins older than some of the aunts and uncles on that side (14 kids :eek: in her family), the youngest aunt and 3 uncles are actually closer to my age than my mom’s. I’m fairly close to several of them, especially those in my age group and visit them when I go up north. The DFCs were like three more sisters. They lived just seven miles from us and in the summer, if we weren’t at their house, they were at ours. I’m still very close to one of them. The other two, not so much, since one has gotten into evangelical Xianity and the other wouldn’t be too out of place on the Jerry Springer Show. I’m FB friends with a big hunk of them and keep the family picture album there for everyone, since inheriting them. ---
**Author:** ![rowrrbazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rowrrbazzle/32/414_2.png) [@rowrrbazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rowrrbazzle)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2011, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cousins/587075/43 "2011-06-29T03:34:23Z")
I have 17 first cousins (and 3 siblings). When I was a kid, our families would visit each other once or twice a year, sometimes on holidays. It was fun, but we didn’t have relationships outside of that. Now I see them rarely. ---
**Author:** ![rhubarbarin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eb9ed0/32.png) [@rhubarbarin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rhubarbarin)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2011, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cousins/587075/44 "2011-06-29T03:49:52Z")
Our families almost always lived many states apart and more recently, scattered all over the world. Plus the cousin closest to me in age is 4 years older, so I never got that very close, familiar relationship with my cousins that many people who grew up in the same area did. Currently I only talk to two on a regular basis (mostly through facebook). My favorite cousin was given up for adoption by my aunt at birth, so I didn’t even meet her until I was about 14. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2011, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cousins/587075/45 "2011-06-29T04:02:24Z")
On my mother’s side I have three first cousins – they’re all older than I am, and since they lived in Florida, I never really saw them a lot. On my dad’s side, however, there are eleven of us grandchildren, and we all kind of came in “sets” (Like my cousin C.B. and I were born only six weeks apart, then the next two cousins were only a few months apart, etc, etc.) It was like every time one aunt got pregnant, someone else did at the same time. So we’re all really close in age. We kind of separated ourselves into the first seven, and then the four younger ones. We were always playing together at each others’ houses, or at my grandparents. I remember we’d always go to C.B.'s, Tina’s and Josh’s house for Halloween because they lived in a HUGE plan. Marc and his sister would come, and then my dad and my uncles would take us around trick or treating, and my mom and my aunts would all pass out candy. Tina and I were always having sleepovers at each other’s houses, and stuff like that. So I have tons of good memories. Now that we’re older, we don’t see each other as much, but we’re still a pretty close family. We still have our big family Christmas at someone’s house, and now that everyone’s having kids, THEY’RE coming too, so it’s even more crowded than ever! ---
**Author:** ![VernWinterbottom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c67d28/32.png) [@VernWinterbottom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VernWinterbottom)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2011, 4:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cousins/587075/46 "2011-06-29T04:06:01Z")
Not close at all to any of my first cousins. I was the first born grandchild on both sides of the family, my parents both being the oldest children of their respective familes. My brother, five years younger than me, was next born, then a couple of years before the first of our first cousins were born. We all lived in the same town and one set of cousins lived right next door, but age and personalities kept most of us from being very close. Being the oldest of them all, I was always closer to older members of the family, aunts, my father’s first cousins, etc. I’m rarely in communication with any of them. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2011, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cousins/587075/47 "2011-06-29T04:17:16Z")
My mother was an only child, so none on that side. I have a passel of cousins in California, where my father was from, but I doubt I’d know any if they walked up to me. Growing up in Texas, I could count on one hand the number of times I saw them. I did see some on several stopovers in California in the 1990s, but I might not remember them at first if they appeared out of the blue now. Others I’ve not laid eyes on since my grandmother’s funeral in 1966. Not even in e-mail contact with any. So, not close. For all intents and purposes, the wife is the only real family I have now, apart from an elderly uncle and a couple of aunts we still send Christmas cards to. ---
**Author:** ![MissTake](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/misstake/32/3189_2.png) [@MissTake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MissTake)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2011, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cousins/587075/48 "2011-06-29T04:31:27Z")
I have two first cousins on my mom’s side. One cousin is 10 years older than me, married, haven’t seen in 20 years. The other cousin is 6 years older than me, and no one know where she is. At any family gathering I found I hung out with their cousin more than I did with them. On my dad’s side there are… 12 first cousins, I think? I am Facebook friends with two who live out West. There are another 4 or 5 out East that I wouldn’t know from Adam. I don’t recall ever meeting them - just being related to their asshat father is bad enough. The rest are here, they don’t like us and that’s fine. ---
**Author:** ![BwanaBob](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bwanabob/32/2985_2.png) [@BwanaBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BwanaBob)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2011, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cousins/587075/49 "2011-06-29T13:52:45Z")
All my cousins live in Europe. I feel somewhat cheated by the fact that the distance (and language) was a stumbling block for us to grow really close. As a child I’d spent weeks with them (at a clip), and some made the voyage here for weeklong visits. I have great memories from those visits; but I would have loved to have had more access to them (and vice-versa). My own children have a similar situation since all their cousins live in other states. ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2011, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cousins/587075/50 "2011-06-29T14:18:29Z")
My one cousin that lives closest (about 100 miles) and I are bestest of best friends. Always have been. In fact, she went on a cruise with my Wife and I recently. Her older sister and I aren’t quite as close, as we don’t talk on the phone much, but definietly friends. My other cousins just live too far away. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2011, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cousins/587075/51 "2011-06-29T14:27:40Z")
I haven’t seen or spoken to any of my cousins in a couple years. ---
**Author:** ![Rachellelogram](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rachellelogram/32/8689_2.png) [@Rachellelogram](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rachellelogram)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2011, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cousins/587075/52 "2011-06-29T18:28:34Z")
I only have four first cousins (mom’s sister’s 2 kids, mom’s brother’s 1 kid, and dad’s sister’s 1 kid). God knows how many removed and second cousins, though. I couldn’t name many of those. I haven’t been close to my paternal side of the family since disowning my father. I used to have a good relationship with my mom’s sister’s 2 kids, because they were only a couple years younger than me and my sister and they lived nearby. We used to play together as kids, and they lived with us for a little while during a CPS investigation in high school. Since adulthood, the male cousin went into the military and works on cars–he’s a cool enough guy, but we don’t live close anymore–and the female cousin is in jail for attempted fraud/identity theft of an old lady she was assigned to take care of. Falling into her mother’s footsteps, I’m afraid. Family in general has been a major source of disappointment in my life; with the exception of my sister and my mother, I just don’t give a fuck about any of them. And most of the time I don’t give a fuck about my mother, either. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cousins/587075.md?page=2)