# Cracked article about dick farts **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 9, 2018, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cracked-article-about-dick-farts/813839 "2018-05-09T02:13:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Enola\_Straight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dec6dc/32.png) [@Enola\_Straight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Straight)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2018, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cracked-article-about-dick-farts/813839/1 "2018-05-09T02:13:39Z")
Recent article (#3): > **[5 Alarming Things That Can Happen To Your Crotch](https://www.cracked.com/blog/5-alarming-things-that-can-happen-to-your-crotch)** > > Despite what YouTube fail videos teach us, there are worse things that can happen to our misfit toys than an errant football or vengeful knee. Classic thread: [https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=504053&highlight=fart](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=504053&highlight=fart) :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Enola\_Gay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/3ab097/32.png) [@Enola\_Gay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Gay)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2018, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cracked-article-about-dick-farts/813839/2 "2018-05-09T03:32:22Z")
Did you write the Cracked article or are you a prophet? ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2018, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cracked-article-about-dick-farts/813839/3 "2018-05-09T04:14:02Z")
That classic thread just cracked me up:)!! ---
**Author:** ![Enola\_Gay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/3ab097/32.png) [@Enola\_Gay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Gay)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2018, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cracked-article-about-dick-farts/813839/4 "2018-05-09T04:30:26Z")
There should be a gallery of classic threads. Many have been linked to and they’re always hilarious, but having them in a Classic Thread Hall of Fame makes a lot of sense to me. ---
**Author:** ![DavidwithanR](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@DavidwithanR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidwithanR)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2018, 6:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cracked-article-about-dick-farts/813839/5 "2018-05-09T06:13:26Z")
Post 9 in the classic thread is (unfortunately?) the best thing I’ve read all day. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2018, 9:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cracked-article-about-dick-farts/813839/6 "2018-05-09T09:35:48Z")
> [@Enola\_Gay](#): > > Did you write the Cracked article or are you a prophet? I give this one 6.0 across the board for best first responder to the OP’s OP. ---
**Author:** ![Serenata67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/serenata67/32/10646_2.png) [@Serenata67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Serenata67)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2018, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cracked-article-about-dick-farts/813839/7 "2018-05-10T14:32:58Z")
The classic thread is freaking hilarious. I’m trying not to bust out laughing right now. I’m not being very successful. ---
**Author:** ![swampspruce](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampspruce/32/261_2.png) [@swampspruce](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampspruce)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2018, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cracked-article-about-dick-farts/813839/8 "2018-05-10T15:29:22Z")
One more day of stifling giggles like an idiot in front of my co-workers… I’m so glad this message board exists. ---
**Author:** ![nelliebly](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nelliebly/32/5422_2.png) [@nelliebly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nelliebly)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2018, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cracked-article-about-dick-farts/813839/9 "2018-05-10T16:53:56Z")
Did anyone else click the pan-fried semen link in the classic thread? I am…speechless. Ignorance has been fought, all right, and I am never, ever ordering huevos rancheros again…unless the chef is really hot and would respect me in the morning. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2018, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cracked-article-about-dick-farts/813839/10 "2018-05-10T19:28:06Z")
Nooooo! Why did I click that? I gotta bleach my brain now. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2018, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cracked-article-about-dick-farts/813839/11 "2018-05-10T20:49:24Z")
> [@nelliebly](#): > > Did anyone else click the pan-fried semen link in the classic thread? There was another old thread asking whether we sucked in air through our penis after urinating. I guess the poster thought our bladders were a fixed size, and we had to fill them with air after urinating. ---
**Author:** ![Mahaloth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mahaloth/32/1079_2.png) [@Mahaloth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mahaloth)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2018, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cracked-article-about-dick-farts/813839/12 "2018-05-10T23:25:21Z")
> [@Enola\_Gay](#): > > There should be a gallery of classic threads. Many have been linked to and they’re always hilarious, but having them in a Classic Thread Hall of Fame makes a lot of sense to me. [We did, kind of.](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=447019) And the old website we had also had a collection of favorites. ---
**Author:** ![nelliebly](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nelliebly/32/5422_2.png) [@nelliebly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nelliebly)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2018, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cracked-article-about-dick-farts/813839/13 "2018-05-11T03:35:24Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Nooooo! Why did I click that? I gotta bleach my brain now. > [@panache45](#): > > There was another old thread asking whether we sucked in air through our penis after urinating. I guess the poster thought our bladders were a fixed size, and we had to fill them with air after urinating. Like a turkey baster???