# Crap brands game **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 11, 2004, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-brands-game/223921 "2004-01-11T03:31:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2004, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-brands-game/223921/1 "2004-01-11T03:31:52Z")
Here’s how it works. Poster submits a really bad brand name for something… Poosuck coffee. Next poster comes up with a really bad slogan for it… Drink Poosuck coffee, go toilet fast. and then comes up with a new product brand name. Mods feel free to close this thread at your leasure. I know you don’t want too many game threads. But I figured there aren’t that many so one will be ok so… _Cropsmell cornflakes_ ---
**Author:** ![Horseflesh](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horseflesh/32/7502_2.png) [@Horseflesh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horseflesh)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2004, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-brands-game/223921/2 "2004-01-11T03:45:26Z")
Cropsmell cornflakes - “They’re Gr-r-r-r-r-ross!” Dingleberry Doughnuts ---
**Author:** ![xayoz306](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/bc8723/32.png) [@xayoz306](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xayoz306)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2004, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-brands-game/223921/3 "2004-01-11T03:50:50Z")
Cropsmell Cornflakes…Wake up with the aroma of Iowa Simon Says Action figures ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2004, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-brands-game/223921/4 "2004-01-11T04:40:10Z")
Simon Says Action figures - with rigid body parts. (warning, may cause death or brain damage if touched) _Piss Cola._ ---
**Author:** ![monica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a183cd/32.png) [@monica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monica)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2004, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-brands-game/223921/5 "2004-01-11T04:45:26Z")
Piss Cola- Goes in one end, out the other, without changing a bit! Chalky Croutons ---
**Author:** ![IrreverentTone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@IrreverentTone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IrreverentTone)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2004, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-brands-game/223921/6 "2004-01-11T04:48:51Z")
Dingleberry Donuts - Mmmmm brown crunchy bits - Now In Ass Flavor. Piss Cola - Easier on your kidneys, since we’ve already run it through once! Phlegm Phranks ---
**Author:** ![Horseflesh](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horseflesh/32/7502_2.png) [@Horseflesh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horseflesh)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2004, 6:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-brands-game/223921/7 "2004-01-11T06:28:12Z")
Phlegm Phranks - Just like mom used to hork. Hershey’s Underwear ---
**Author:** ![Soul\_Brother\_Number\_Two](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/soul_brother_number_two/32/3515_2.png) [@Soul\_Brother\_Number\_Two](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soul_Brother_Number_Two)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2004, 7:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-brands-game/223921/8 "2004-01-11T07:15:46Z")
Hershey’s Underwear - Wear 'em as long as you like with no embarrassing skidmarks. Fuck-its ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2004, 7:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-brands-game/223921/9 "2004-01-11T07:32:46Z")
Fuck-its™ - World’s best conversation stopper. Bling Bling Surprise™ ---
**Author:** ![Horseflesh](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horseflesh/32/7502_2.png) [@Horseflesh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horseflesh)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2004, 7:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-brands-game/223921/10 "2004-01-11T07:44:03Z")
Fuck-its - When there’s nothing in the house to eat and the dog is jealously guarding it’s bowl. Bling Bling Surprise - Bling bling mixed with popcorn, almonds and coated in caramel. A broken tooth in every bite! Party Poopers ---
**Author:** ![hyperjes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/df705f/32.png) [@hyperjes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hyperjes)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2004, 8:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-brands-game/223921/11 "2004-01-11T08:39:07Z")
Party Poopers- Breaking up gatherings since 2003! Yeasty Curds ---
**Author:** ![abba21](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f4b2a3/32.png) [@abba21](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/abba21)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2004, 8:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-brands-game/223921/12 "2004-01-11T08:58:27Z")
Yeasty Curds–they’re the life of the panty! Ron Jeremy O’s ---
**Author:** ![Horseflesh](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horseflesh/32/7502_2.png) [@Horseflesh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horseflesh)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2004, 9:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-brands-game/223921/13 "2004-01-11T09:05:51Z")
Ron Jeremy O’s - Each one used as a cock ring by the Jizzmaster hisself! Bitch Crackers ---
**Author:** ![pilot141](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e0b2c6/32.png) [@pilot141](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pilot141)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2004, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-brands-game/223921/14 "2004-01-11T13:41:09Z")
Bitch Crackers - You crumble them up, they slap you back! Chicks Ahoy! cookies. ---
**Author:** ![Horseflesh](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horseflesh/32/7502_2.png) [@Horseflesh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horseflesh)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2004, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-brands-game/223921/15 "2004-01-11T20:48:14Z")
Chicks Ahoy! cookies - Packs more seamen into every bite. Honey Bunches of Goats ---
**Author:** ![Rico](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rico/32/3582_2.png) [@Rico](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rico)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2004, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-brands-game/223921/16 "2004-01-11T22:11:45Z")
Honey Bunches of Goats - you’ll go maa-aaa-aaa-aaad for them! Lorena Bobbitt Hot Dogs ---
**Author:** ![Paradoxical](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/77aa72/32.png) [@Paradoxical](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paradoxical)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2004, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-brands-game/223921/17 "2004-01-11T22:16:47Z")
Lorena Bobbit Hotdogs, don’t buy another brand or we’ll cut yours off! Poonut butter… ---
**Author:** ![punkkid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7feea3/32.png) [@punkkid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/punkkid)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2004, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-brands-game/223921/18 "2004-01-11T22:29:59Z")
Poonut Butter: The Kopi Luwak of Peanut Butter! Cream of Pete… ---
**Author:** ![racer72](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/racer72/32/3075_2.png) [@racer72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racer72)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2004, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-brands-game/223921/19 "2004-01-12T01:20:06Z")
Cream of Pete, the corn not only adds texture, it’s good for you! Slut Jemimah Pancakes… ---
**Author:** ![Rico](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rico/32/3582_2.png) [@Rico](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rico)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2004, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-brands-game/223921/20 "2004-01-12T05:14:03Z")
Slut Jemimah Pancakes - betcha can’t eat the “ho” thing! Dreyer’s Mice Cream