# Crap foods you love **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Tags:** food-cooking\ **Created:** [June 13, 2022, 12:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-foods-you-love/966097 "2022-06-13T12:23:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![pkbites](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pkbites/32/204_2.png) [@pkbites](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pkbites)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2022, 11:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-foods-you-love/966097/101 "2022-06-14T11:13:42Z")
> [@Smapti](#): > > > [@pkbites](#): > > > > They are deep fried, right? Because they sure taste like they are. > > Yes. The tacos come frozen with the meat already stuffed in the middle. They’re defrosted for 24 hours in the walk-in fridge before use. When it’s time to cook them, they get placed into an inverted-U-shaped rack that snaps closed to hold them in place, then deep-fried for 50 seconds (in the oldest batch of fryer oil the store has, which has already been used for 3 days and will be discarded at the end of the day, and which is exclusively used for the tacos). When they’re done, the cook lifts the rack out of the oil and tilts it to pour the oil out from the inside of the taco, then opens the rack and pours them out onto an assembly rack, where they’re pulled open and filled with half a slice of American cheese, about an ounce of shredded iceberg lettuce, and a line of taco sauce, after which they’re bagged and served. I got chest pains just reading that! ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2022, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-foods-you-love/966097/102 "2022-06-14T12:59:01Z")
> [@pkbites](#): > > I got chest pains just reading that! Were they _hunger pang_ chest pains? ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2022, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-foods-you-love/966097/103 "2022-06-14T13:41:40Z")
That sounds like something that would be devised by a set of dice with foods printed on the faces. > [@pkbites](#): > > Is there anything crappier yet more celestial than a Jack in the Box taco? They deep fry them things for heavens sake. Could that be any worse for you? Or taste any better? +1 There’s not much better at 2 am after a evening out. ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2022, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-foods-you-love/966097/104 "2022-06-14T14:00:23Z")
> [@Cardigan](#): > > I’ll sometimes use ramen noodles when making Yakisoba. Boil and drain the noodles. Then just briefly stir fry with some mixed veggies, sesame oil, and soy. Bingo, cheap meal. For completely “crap-food” yakisoba, try these: [https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0028PDFQG](https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0028PDFQG) Kit includes everything you need, including a tiny packet of dried veggies. As crap foods go, it’s really good. ---
**Author:** ![TRC4941](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trc4941/32/6792_2.png) [@TRC4941](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TRC4941)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2022, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-foods-you-love/966097/105 "2022-06-14T14:07:08Z")
Hostess Cupcakes Velveeta for grilled cheese White bread, bologna, & American cheese sandwich - nothing else on it Dip for tortilla chips: Cheese Whiz mixed and melted with a can of Hormel chili (no beans) in a crock pot or microwave if I’m in a hurry Lucky Charms Oreos - I’m not a huge fan of the filling so the Oreo thins are perfect. If I could only get a Hydrox! Plain potato chips - saltier the better Peanuts roasted in the shell (salted) - I suck off the salt off the shell then crack open for the peanut Pepperoni pizza rolls And I kind of like a nice fresh circus peanut once in a while. ---
**Author:** ![Seanette](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/seanette/32/9139_2.png) [@Seanette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seanette)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2022, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-foods-you-love/966097/106 "2022-06-14T14:10:34Z")
> [@TRC4941](#): > > White bread, bologna, & American cheese sandwich - nothing else on it I’d put a thin layer of mayo on that myself. Now wishing I had some bologna on hand. (sigh) ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2022, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-foods-you-love/966097/107 "2022-06-14T14:12:27Z")
> [@TRC4941](#): > > And I kind of like a nice fresh circus peanut once in a while. - I don’t think they’re allowed to sell them fresh. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2022, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-foods-you-love/966097/108 "2022-06-14T14:21:02Z")
Back when I was running a courier service in my late 20s, my standard cheap crap for lunch would be AM/PM. We had an ARCO fleet card, so whenever I’d stop to refuel I’d hit their crap food bar for a double burger, then load it up with BBQ sauce, relish and pickled jalapeño slices. That would keep the heartburn going for the rest of the day. ---
**Author:** ![carrps](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carrps/32/2957_2.png) [@carrps](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carrps)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2022, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-foods-you-love/966097/109 "2022-06-14T14:32:39Z")
> [@terentii](#): > > My mother always bought Cool Whip and Hi-C “fruit” drink instead of the real stuff. Whether this was a question of economics or personal taste, I don’t know, but she couldn’t be persuaded to do otherwise. My mom never brought any of those “fruit” drinks, but it was always margarine in our house. And I know it was economics. Once when I was 3 or 4 I told my grandma that she had the best jam when she gave me some toast at her house. Unbeknownst to me at the time, it was the butter. Once I moved out, no matter how strapped I was, I only ate butter. Oh gawd, I hate to admit it but I used to have an air pop corn popper – it’s healthier, right? Then, I’d melt a quarter cup of butter to pour on top. Yum! > [@Smapti](#): > > > [@pkbites](#): > > > > > Is there anything crappier yet more celestial than a Jack in the Box taco? > > > [/quote] > > > > > > I worked at Jack in the Box for 6 1/2 years. Those tacos still haunt my nightmares, but to this day they’re the only thing I’ll eat that contains American cheese. > > They are deep fried, right? Because they sure taste like they are. An ex-bf always ate them after a night out drinking. We were all much younger then. ---
**Author:** ![solost](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/solost/32/11776_2.png) [@solost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/solost)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2022, 2:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-foods-you-love/966097/110 "2022-06-14T14:34:13Z")
> [@Nyvaak](#): > > Two words: “Captain” and “Crunch.” > The lowest of the low, the crappiest of the crap. Will I even be allowed back here again after such a confession? It’s ok Nyvaak, this is a safe space to share your crap food cravings. When I was a kid Cap’n Crunch (not Captain, c’mon man) was by far, bar none, my favorite breakfast cereal. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2022, 2:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-foods-you-love/966097/111 "2022-06-14T14:37:00Z")
You know it’s crap because Crunch isn’t really a Cap’n. Look at his sleeves! ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2022, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-foods-you-love/966097/112 "2022-06-14T14:44:37Z")
> [@Machine\_Elf](#): > > Kit includes everything you need, including a tiny packet of dried veggies. As crap foods go, it’s really good. 42 DOLLARS for a packet of ramen noodles and dried veggies?! It had damned well better have **truffles** in it for that price. At the local grocery, two packets of ramen noodles go for around 50 cents, a package of cubed ham (if you’re in the mood to splurge) $2.89, and a bag of mixed veggies maybe $1.79 ---
**Author:** ![Seanette](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/seanette/32/9139_2.png) [@Seanette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seanette)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2022, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-foods-you-love/966097/113 "2022-06-14T14:48:39Z")
> [@Cardigan](#): > > 42 DOLLARS for a packet of ramen noodles and dried veggies?! It had damned well better have **truffles** in it for that price. Multi-pack, the $42 gets you 12 of them. Still not great pricing at $3.50/each. ---
**Author:** ![carrps](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carrps/32/2957_2.png) [@carrps](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carrps)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2022, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-foods-you-love/966097/114 "2022-06-14T14:49:35Z")
Double post. ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2022, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-foods-you-love/966097/115 "2022-06-14T14:50:56Z")
They call it “aging”. ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2022, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-foods-you-love/966097/116 "2022-06-14T14:53:11Z")
> [@Seanette](#): > > Multi-pack, the $42 gets you 12 of them. Still not great pricing at $3.50/each. The OP left room for interpretation of the “crap” in “crap foods:” > [@iiandyiiii](#): > > What cheap, unhealthy, highly processed, or otherwise crap foods do you love? I admit they’re not particularly cheap, but they’re definitely unhealthy and highly processed. [![](https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/0561/3553/products/Ippeichan_Yakisoba_by_Myojo_1024x1024.png?v=1428863507) ](https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/0561/3553/products/Ippeichan_Yakisoba_by_Myojo_1024x1024.png?v=1428863507) ---
**Author:** ![racer72](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/racer72/32/3075_2.png) [@racer72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racer72)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2022, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-foods-you-love/966097/117 "2022-06-14T14:56:57Z")
My local Dollar Tree sells frozen hamburgers and chicken sandwiches. Microwave for a minute and add some [Mayochup](https://www.boxed.com/product/6701/heinz-mayochup-saucy-sauce-2-x-19-25-oz?pf=3&gid=6701&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=Google%7CShopping%7CUS%7CNB%7CGrocery%7CDT&utm_purpose=acquisition&utm_experiment=none&utm_ad_id=506484243964&utm_term=&cmp=12549214267&dev=c&gclid=CjwKCAjw46CVBhB1EiwAgy6M4mqzgmaybpNa8yOpThh43NJc_rpEzGHzAnkgPYdk7CszqR1Z3twWmxoCrgwQAvD_BwE) and for the hamburger, some sweet pickle relish and I have lunch. ---
**Author:** ![Horatius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horatius/32/3572_2.png) [@Horatius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatius)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2022, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-foods-you-love/966097/118 "2022-06-14T15:07:58Z")
They had garlic bread flavored pretzel pieces in Japan when I visited there in 2008. I’ve looked, but never found them in Canada. They were great! ---
**Author:** ![ParallelLines](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/parallellines/32/3575_2.png) [@ParallelLines](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ParallelLines)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2022, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-foods-you-love/966097/119 "2022-06-14T15:13:38Z")
> [@Nyvaak](#): > > Two words: “Captain” and “Crunch.” > The lowest of the low, the crappiest of the crap. Will I even be allowed back here again after such a confession? We haven’t banished @ThelmaLou for their loathsome Cool Whip fondness, why would we excommunicate you for your far lesser sin? > [@iiandyiiii](#): > > There aren’t any Jack in the Box stores nearby me (or anywhere on the east coast, apparently) but I remember loving those tacos in college in Louisiana. Around (goddammit) 25 years ago I’d only been living in Colorado for a few years, where JitB had been gone for some time. A friend was missing those self-same tacos and happened to look up where the closest JitB was - it happened to be in Las Cruces NM. I went “That’s funny, I grew up there, my folks still live there.” We (myself, wife and said friend) ended up doing a road trip to visit my folks and get said friend JitB about 2 weeks later. And he still loved them - luckily he was still in his 20s, I don’t think any of us could survive without chronic heartburn from any such thing these days. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2022, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-foods-you-love/966097/120 "2022-06-14T15:29:19Z")
> [@ParallelLines](#): > > We haven’t banished @ThelmaLou for their loathsome Cool Whip fondness, why would we excommunicate you for your far lesser sin?- You guys are all heart(burn). 🙄 * * * As for deep-fried crispy tacos, apparently they are A Thing called Tacos Dorados. Julia and Bridget made some on America’s Test Kitchen. (They weren’t exactly _deep_-fried, but they were good-enough fried.) [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/2XXWGjHtGOg/maxresdefault.jpg "How to Make Crispy Tacos Dorados From Scratch") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2XXWGjHtGOg) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-foods-you-love/966097.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crap-foods-you-love/966097.md?page=7)