# Create a superhero (that would get you murdered)! **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 11, 2013, 8:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-a-superhero-that-would-get-you-murdered/663213 "2013-07-11T08:58:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Andy\_L](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c67d28/32.png) [@Andy\_L](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Andy_L)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-a-superhero-that-would-get-you-murdered/663213/21 "2013-07-11T19:24:07Z")
> [@Johnny\_Ecks](#): > > The anthology Superheroes contained a short story called Origin Story by Dwight R. Decker Just the one I was thinking of. ---
**Author:** ![DrFidelius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drfidelius/32/3447_2.png) [@DrFidelius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrFidelius)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-a-superhero-that-would-get-you-murdered/663213/22 "2013-07-11T19:26:19Z")
The Queef - she can fly through the force of her, nevermind. ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-a-superhero-that-would-get-you-murdered/663213/23 "2013-07-11T19:32:25Z")
When I was in college I wrote a script and had an artist do some preliminary drawings for my contribution to superhero-dom: Jesusman. I know I still have the script and the drawings somewhere in my files. When I get moved in and start unpacking, I’ll have to keep an eye out for them and post the pics in this thread. ---
**Author:** ![Bakhesh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3da27b/32.png) [@Bakhesh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bakhesh)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-a-superhero-that-would-get-you-murdered/663213/24 "2013-07-11T21:06:37Z")
I think I miss read the op, thinking it was the character who was going to get killed by angry mob, not the creator. So, I suppose…Moo-hammed? ---
**Author:** ![moriah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b2d939/32.png) [@moriah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moriah)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-a-superhero-that-would-get-you-murdered/663213/25 "2013-07-11T22:00:35Z")
Radioactive Man. He’s really radioactive. Everyone he saves eventually dies of radiation poison. In fact, even bystanders, and cops. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-a-superhero-that-would-get-you-murdered/663213/26 "2013-07-11T23:25:51Z")
> [@Snowboarder\_Bo](#): > > When I was in college I wrote a script and had an artist do some preliminary drawings for my contribution to superhero-dom: Jesusman. > > I know I still have the script and the drawings somewhere in my files. When I get moved in and start unpacking, I’ll have to keep an eye out for them and post the pics in this thread. Are you aware of National Lampoon’s [Son of God](http://www.dialbforblog.com/archives/417/)comics? ---
**Author:** ![YogSothoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/8edcca/32.png) [@YogSothoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YogSothoth)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-a-superhero-that-would-get-you-murdered/663213/27 "2013-07-11T23:40:40Z")
The Elder Zion. A wizened, venerable Jewish elder who feeds on the blood of Muslim babies to power his Jew eye death rays and indestructible claws. Wears a metal yarmulke that he can throw and has a vestigial tail that he uses to swing through the rooftops as he hops from bank to bank stealing 10% for his gefilte fish bottling plant ---
**Author:** ![The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_other_waldo_pepper/32/12370_2.png) [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Other_Waldo_Pepper)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2013, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-a-superhero-that-would-get-you-murdered/663213/28 "2013-07-12T01:12:13Z")
> [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](#): > > That’s not unusual. There’s also the Spectre and Kid Eternity, for the same reason. There’s also Captain Triumph, sort of. ---
**Author:** ![marshmallow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@marshmallow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/marshmallow)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2013, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-a-superhero-that-would-get-you-murdered/663213/29 "2013-07-12T02:41:09Z")
> [@Ranchoth](#): > > •\*\*Stemm Sell™! \*\*(With apologies to South Park) > “After undergoing experimental embryonic stem cell therapy to treat end-stage neurodegenerative disease, this new hero found that not only had their health been restored, but that they’d gained superhuman longevity, endurance, and strength—as long as they kept up their regimen of fetal stem cell infusions, with ‘booster’ doses for extra power in emergencies, or even gaining fantastic new temporary powers from fetii that had genetic superpower potential!” South Park did this in the episode Krazy Kripples. Christopher Reeve cracked open aborted fetuses and sucked out their innards like a vampire and got super powers. > [@YogSosoth](#): > > The Elder Zion. > > A wizened, venerable Jewish elder who feeds on the blood of Muslim babies to power his Jew eye death rays and indestructible claws. Wears a metal yarmulke that he can throw and has a vestigial tail that he uses to swing through the rooftops as he hops from bank to bank stealing 10% for his gefilte fish bottling plant I dunno. I’d think he’d be the CEO of the bank. And he should emit an aura that brainwashes people into wanting to mix races and be mindless consumers. Don’t forget the horn nubs. And when being pursued instead of throwing caltrops or marbles he tosses out dreidels. ---
**Author:** ![Tracijo67](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/9fc348/32.png) [@Tracijo67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tracijo67)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2013, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-a-superhero-that-would-get-you-murdered/663213/30 "2013-07-12T03:11:32Z")
The Insuranator: able to discern with his magnetic resonance and genetic structo-vision who among us is disabled or will become terminally (or even just chronically) ill, and sets them afloat on chunks of Arctic ice. ---
**Author:** ![Silvorange](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8dc957/32.png) [@Silvorange](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silvorange)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2013, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-a-superhero-that-would-get-you-murdered/663213/31 "2013-07-12T03:18:01Z")
A bloody fetus with a set of scales and a sword: Miscarriage of Justice! ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2013, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-a-superhero-that-would-get-you-murdered/663213/32 "2013-07-12T03:18:05Z")
> [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](#): > > Are you aware of National Lampoon’s [Son of God](http://www.dialbforblog.com/archives/417/)comics? haha nope never saw that before. I didn’t get into NatLamp until the early '80s. ---
**Author:** ![NDP](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ndp/32/55_2.png) [@NDP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NDP)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2013, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-a-superhero-that-would-get-you-murdered/663213/33 "2013-07-12T03:21:05Z")
> [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](#): > > Are you aware of National Lampoon’s [Son of God](http://www.dialbforblog.com/archives/417/)comics? How well known was Jack Chick’s work in the early 70s? Those comics (especially the first one) look like a dead-on parody of what a typical Jack Chick comic would look like if he knew how to draw. ---
**Author:** ![Sodalite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/34f0e0/32.png) [@Sodalite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sodalite)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2013, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-a-superhero-that-would-get-you-murdered/663213/34 "2013-07-13T22:45:29Z")
[Shezow.](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dSGy1y-c4DM) A twelve year old boy finds his great aunt’s power ring and it gives him the female themed super powers of Shezow. I love this show. I didn’t know what to think when I first saw the previews. I was pleasantly surprised by the way it’s handled. They don’t beat you over the head with the whole “boy in a dress” thing. It doesn’t even rate a mention in a lot of episodes. Plenty of people have their panties in a knot over it, though. ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2013, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-a-superhero-that-would-get-you-murdered/663213/35 "2013-07-13T23:30:30Z")
Holy Father: a priest who gains super powers for 24 hours each time he deflowers a virgin nun. He feels really guilty about it but if it’s an emergency… ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2013, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-a-superhero-that-would-get-you-murdered/663213/36 "2013-07-13T23:49:39Z")
> [@Johnny\_Ecks](#): > > The anthology Superheroes contained a short story called Origin Story by Dwight R. Decker > It was about a man offered the chance to embody the power of an ancient sun god- when he puts on the magic ring he is transformed into Captain Swastika. And his sidekick, Hitler Youth. ---
**Author:** ![Phnord\_Prephect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/df705f/32.png) [@Phnord\_Prephect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phnord_Prephect)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2013, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-a-superhero-that-would-get-you-murdered/663213/37 "2013-07-14T02:53:12Z")
> [@Lumpy](#): > > Holy Father: a priest who gains super powers for 24 hours each time he deflowers a virgin nun. He feels really guilty about it but if it’s an emergency… How about AltarBoy? His powers work in much the same way except… ya know… reversed. :eek: too soon? :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2013, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-a-superhero-that-would-get-you-murdered/663213/38 "2013-07-14T03:18:39Z")
Symbol is three interlocking G’s, in a triangle, with a bullseye around them: It’s Good Guy with a Gun! ---
**Author:** ![drastic\_quench](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e36b37/32.png) [@drastic\_quench](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drastic_quench)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2013, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-a-superhero-that-would-get-you-murdered/663213/39 "2013-07-14T03:21:01Z")
> [@Phnord\_Prephect](#): > > How about AltarBoy? His powers work in much the same way except… ya know… reversed. :eek: > too soon? :dubious: > **[Altar Boy (Character) - Comic Vine](https://comicvine.gamespot.com/altar-boy/4005-44344/)** > > An Astro City vigilante. He is the Confessor's Sidekick. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-a-superhero-that-would-get-you-murdered/663213.md?page=1)