# Create an absurd Haiku! **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 1, 2007, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254 "2007-04-01T01:36:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 11
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 8:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/201 "2007-12-15T08:12:24Z")
Bacon for breakfast Sausages and eggs Cholesterol poisoning ---
**Author:** ![LorieSmurf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a587f6/32.png) [@LorieSmurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LorieSmurf)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 12:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/202 "2007-12-15T12:41:04Z")
She cries to get in She then scratches to get out My cat the moron ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/203 "2007-12-15T21:04:22Z")
Trimming Christmas tree; my wife thinks it still needs more ornaments; she’s wrong. ---
**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/204 "2007-12-15T23:58:49Z")
Holy shit this sucks drank all night long with some friends I feel like dying. ---
**Author:** ![DSYoungEsq](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c6cbf5/32.png) [@DSYoungEsq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DSYoungEsq)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2007, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/205 "2007-12-16T18:44:34Z")
[QUOTE=Elendil’s Heir] I am just in awe; that presidential haiku is a masterpiece. \*(Although I noticed the lines Hayes, Garfield, Arthur, and Grover Cleveland. both lack one syllable…)\* [/QUOTE] Not if you say it Cleev - a - land. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2007, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/206 "2007-12-16T21:32:18Z")
[QUOTE=DSYoungEsq] Not if you say it Cleev - a - land. 😛 [/QUOTE] And you _do?_ :dubious: 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2007, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/207 "2007-12-16T21:48:16Z")
Snow falls on cedars No, really, it does right now There’s a blizzard here. ---
**Author:** ![sturmhauke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47c2d/32.png) [@sturmhauke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sturmhauke)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2007, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/208 "2007-12-16T21:49:41Z")
[QUOTE=Sampiro] Helen Keller heard Ray Charles, Stevie Wonder saw How Sanjaya sucked. [/QUOTE] Hah, this is genius. Here’s mine: There once was a Japanese poet Haiku always caused him to blow it He left Kagoshima And headed to Eire To write limericks, wouldn’t you know it? Mr. T can write haiku! I pity the fool from Japan that can’t! ---
**Author:** ![DSYoungEsq](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c6cbf5/32.png) [@DSYoungEsq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DSYoungEsq)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2007, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/209 "2007-12-16T21:49:43Z")
[QUOTE=Elendil’s Heir] And you _do?_ :dubious: 😃 [/QUOTE] Perfecting haiku Adding in a syllable Is something I’d do. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2007, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/210 "2007-12-16T22:47:15Z")
[QUOTE=LorieSmurf] She cries to get in She then scratches to get out My cat the moron [/QUOTE] Have you ever seen A cat feeding a human? Well, there you are, then. ---
**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2007, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/211 "2007-12-17T14:31:24Z")
Christmas approaches I swear if I’m not done soon shopping will kill me ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2007, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/212 "2007-12-17T15:45:38Z")
Family photos are ready at last, so tonight we sign, stamp and seal! ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2007, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/213 "2007-12-17T15:56:37Z")
The darned car spun out Two three-sixties in a row Nobody was killed. God I’m sore today My van is a mess I think But, it’s only stuff. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2007, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/214 "2007-12-17T16:51:34Z")
O **Cartooniverse** , I’m sorry to hear of your mishap; best wishes! ---
**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2007, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/215 "2007-12-17T17:10:34Z")
Car mishaps aren’t good But surviving them sure is glad that you’re ok. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/216 "2007-12-20T14:45:56Z")
Christmas is now just five days away, and I am enjoying these times. ---
**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2007, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/217 "2007-12-20T17:31:50Z")
The doctor said that I have bees inside my head no honey for him. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2007, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/218 "2007-12-21T18:15:27Z")
Almost Christmas, but _still_ I have had no eggnog! That’s just wrong, says I. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2007, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/219 "2007-12-22T17:53:47Z")
Last night had eggnog cold, with rum, nutmeg on top And by Claus, it’s good! ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2007, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/220 "2007-12-22T19:53:45Z")
Sam the Sham sang it Wooly Bully, babydoll ! Sing it you cool cat. 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254.md?page=10) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254.md?page=12)