# Create an absurd Haiku! **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 1, 2007, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254 "2007-04-01T01:36:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 17
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2008, 1:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/321 "2008-02-03T13:32:52Z")
Boulder is the place Bitter winds blow off Front Range Mongolian Pork ! ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 5:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/322 "2008-02-04T05:38:29Z")
Most thought the Pats had the Super Bowl sewed up, but the Giants won! ---
**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/323 "2008-02-04T15:59:22Z")
Well that’s not too good. I seem to be leaking jam tastes like strawberry ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/324 "2008-02-04T16:05:14Z")
Watching white flakes fall Nobody predicted snow Or the Giants win ---
**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/325 "2008-02-04T16:22:38Z")
My hands smell like hay From beating up the scarecrow. It’s my hat now bitch. ---
**Author:** ![Enola\_Straight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dec6dc/32.png) [@Enola\_Straight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Straight)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/326 "2008-02-04T16:52:38Z")
Pipe-smoking tiger inhales sweet vanilla smoke. Purr, puff, purr, puff, purr. :dubious: Jaimie and Adam versus our Cecil Adams. Galactic carnage! :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/327 "2008-02-04T17:30:07Z")
Lunch meat, dinner meat breakfast meat and snack meat monkeys are tasty. ---
**Author:** ![vison](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/e47774/32.png) [@vison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vison)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/328 "2008-02-04T20:01:49Z")
Days since I haikued. However, I’m here today With this good haiku! The urge to haiku Overcomes me quite often Away from my desk. But when I sit down My mind goes blank, I stare off And feel quite stupid. Feeling stupid, though Does not make my fingers stop Making bad haiku. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/329 "2008-02-04T22:04:43Z")
Only one hour then it’s baked spaghetti time forgot lunch at home… ---
**Author:** ![vison](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/e47774/32.png) [@vison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vison)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2008, 3:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/330 "2008-02-07T03:42:01Z")
Cluricaun’s haiku Are all about food these days. Are your cupboards bare? Cluricaun hungers. Spaghetti is not enough To feed you, Doper. Spaghetti like worms In red juice, hunks of dead flesh Clinging. Ick, ick, ick. Haiku!!! Pure and fine Will not clog the arteries, But will fill your brain. Haiku! Chow down now. Cluricaun, feed your head, man, Swallow haiku, be wise. ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2008, 4:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/331 "2008-02-07T04:25:31Z")
Plexiglas brassiere The last gasp of a fine man Engaged in rude thought. What??? It said “Absurd” ! 😛 ---
**Author:** ![vison](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/e47774/32.png) [@vison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vison)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2008, 4:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/332 "2008-02-07T04:38:10Z")
[QUOTE=Cartooniverse] Plexiglas brassiere The last gasp of a fine man Engaged in rude thought. What??? It said “Absurd” ! 😛 [/QUOTE] I really like this! It reads like mounds of pink flesh Constrained in plastic. Pink mounds, pertly tipped Like in a cheap romance tale, Squoze up, spilling out. Lusty sighs. Saran Wrap can be used as condom In emergency. The human mind reels From plastic thought to sexy Actions. Have a smoke. ---
**Author:** ![sturmhauke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47c2d/32.png) [@sturmhauke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sturmhauke)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2008, 6:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/333 "2008-02-07T06:45:31Z")
Clad in a towel I stand at far horizons Viewing my navel ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2008, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/334 "2008-02-26T17:19:06Z")
I was gone too long bereft of haiku, I wept; but lo, and behold! ---
**Author:** ![sturmhauke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47c2d/32.png) [@sturmhauke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sturmhauke)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2008, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/335 "2008-02-26T18:11:37Z")
The haiku slumbers Scheming, dreaming, gibbering Its time is at hand ---
**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2008, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/336 "2008-02-26T19:41:21Z")
Behold, a slumber disturbed by pleas for bad poems Haiku Cthulu. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2008, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/337 "2008-02-27T14:43:31Z")
Vermont creepiness? “The Whisperer in Darkness” fits the bill just fine. ---
**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2008, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/338 "2008-02-27T20:17:30Z")
I have a pet cat But I forgot him in my pocket He smells like Tide now. ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2008, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/339 "2008-02-28T21:08:47Z")
Her rage knows no bounds. Feel the quantum disconnect Remember to breathe. ---
**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2008, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254/340 "2008-02-29T14:35:06Z")
I’m not kidding now I can’t take it anymore Stop the ferris wheel. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254.md?page=16) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-an-absurd-haiku/398254.md?page=18)