# Create the next Godwin's Law **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 28, 2008, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-the-next-godwins-law/450843 "2008-05-28T02:38:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2008, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-the-next-godwins-law/450843/41 "2008-05-29T15:46:15Z")
Even though I thought of the idea (and posted it here on the SDMB) years ago, I still named it after another Doper; it’s called _ **Zev’s 614th Mitzvot** _. Questions posed to message boards about practices in Orthodox Judaism are always posted on Shabbos, between sundown on Friday and Sundown on Saturday. On my message board, there’s _ **Sam’s Law** _: As a thread grows longer, the probability of a Wal-Mart reference approaches one. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2008, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-the-next-godwins-law/450843/42 "2008-05-29T15:50:09Z")
Any poster who accuses another poster of being a crybaby (in any way, including saying “waaaaa”) automatically loses the debate. -tdn’s Law of Projected Infantilism Any poster who insists that a phenomenon exists because a) you can’t prove it doesn’t and b) just because you haven’t seen it only proves that you are close-minded, is probably dead wrong. -tdn’s Law of Orbiting Teapots ---
**Author:** ![MovingTarget](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/edb3f5/32.png) [@MovingTarget](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MovingTarget)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2008, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-the-next-godwins-law/450843/43 "2008-05-29T17:53:52Z")
Originally posted by **Swampwolf** > [@](#): > > I didn’t expect Nemo’s Law! That’s because NOBODY expects Nemo’s Law _D&R_ MT ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2008, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-the-next-godwins-law/450843/44 "2008-05-29T20:09:37Z")
[QUOTE=Annie-Xmas] If you post something good about abortion or something bad about adoption, anti-abortion people will rip you a new one. [/QUOTE] If you argue that there are alternatives to abortion, pro-abortion people will assume a worst-case scenario for every single one. People who are categorically uninterested in belonging to a religion under any circumstances are the fullest of suggestions for how it ought to change its ways to meet with their approval. As any discussion of weight-loss proceeds, the probability of someone presenting themselves as the unique victim of a strange medical condition that forces them to gain weight despite a daily ten-mile run and 500-calorie diet approaches 1. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2008, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-the-next-godwins-law/450843/45 "2008-05-29T20:18:58Z")
[QUOTE=Malacandra] People who are categorically uninterested in belonging to a religion under any circumstances are the fullest of suggestions for how it ought to change its ways to meet with their approval [/QUOTE] I resemble that remark! ---
**Author:** ![Illuminatiprimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/illuminatiprimus/32/11520_2.png) [@Illuminatiprimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Illuminatiprimus)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2008, 10:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-the-next-godwins-law/450843/46 "2008-05-29T22:20:20Z")
[QUOTE=Malacandra] People who are categorically uninterested in belonging to a religion under any circumstances are the fullest of suggestions for how it ought to change its ways to meet with their approval. [/QUOTE] And I have the "Ask the Satanist thread " to prove it. I don’t think I’ve ever encountered so many uninterested customers suggesting the product shouldn’t even be on the shelf in one place before. ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-the-next-godwins-law/450843/47 "2008-05-30T01:05:28Z")
This is something I noticed and first described over twenty years ago: All customers, regardless of their intelligence outside the place of consumption, are idiots. Henceforth to be known as Loki’s Observation. ---
**Author:** ![Gary\_Robson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gary_robson/32/3448_2.png) [@Gary\_Robson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Robson)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-the-next-godwins-law/450843/48 "2008-05-30T01:26:25Z")
[QUOTE=kunilou] Any reference to George W. Bush must immediately be rejoined by a reference to Bill Clinton. [/QUOTE] And vice-versa. In fact, here’s Wombat’s Postulate: Any poster making a negative comment about George W. Bush will immediately be called a Clinton-lover and any poster making a negative comment about Bill Clinton will be immediately called a Bush-lover. or, to abbreviate: They just won’t let ya hate 'em both. ---
**Author:** ![LurkMeister](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3da27b/32.png) [@LurkMeister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LurkMeister)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-the-next-godwins-law/450843/49 "2008-05-30T16:48:36Z")
In any thread which even remotely refers to the lottery, someone will post a comment about the lottery being an “idiot tax”. ---
**Author:** ![Wargamer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/df705f/32.png) [@Wargamer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wargamer)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-the-next-godwins-law/450843/50 "2008-05-30T19:28:46Z")
The ratio of thread views to thread posts in directly proportional to the amount of times the word ‘sex’ is used in the title. WARGAMER’S LAW ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-the-next-godwins-law/450843/51 "2008-05-30T19:54:51Z")
[QUOTE=Malacandra] If you argue that there are alternatives to abortion, pro-abortion people will assume a worst-case scenario for every single one. [/QUOTE] Only pro-choice people use the term “anti-abortion” (which that group is) and only pro-life people use the term “pro-abortion” (which pro-choice people are not, with very rare exceptions). ---
**Author:** ![gravitycrash](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/977dab/32.png) [@gravitycrash](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gravitycrash)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-the-next-godwins-law/450843/52 "2008-05-30T20:16:57Z")
Whenever you request a receipt at the drive thru for work related expenses the drive thru monkey will invariably roll their eyes and say " it is in the bag sir. " If I forget to ask, there is never a fucking receipt in the bag. Never fails either. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2008, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-the-next-godwins-law/450843/53 "2008-05-30T22:37:15Z")
[QUOTE=Annie-Xmas] Only pro-choice people use the term “anti-abortion” (which that group is) and only pro-life people use the term “pro-abortion” (which pro-choice people are not, with very rare exceptions). [/QUOTE] Of course, because if I were “pro-choice” about wife-beating, I certainly would not be “pro-wife-beating”. Now shall we let them have their thread back? ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Knig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@Typo\_Knig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Knig)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2008, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-the-next-godwins-law/450843/54 "2008-05-31T02:53:02Z")
“If you have more material than you can possibly film, don’t add anything. And really, really don’t add utter **CRAP**!” [David Lynch’s Law](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0087182/) (Cuz there’s two hours of my like I’m not getting back!) According to this [thread=469489]thread[/thread], the producers of the Andromeda Strain remake needed this law. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2008, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-the-next-godwins-law/450843/55 "2008-06-01T03:01:53Z")
(Before people comment, these rules are ones I’ve developed for the Internet as a whole, and not just this site.) **Governor Quinn’s First Law on Political Posts** : In a thread were some sort of political scandal is being discussed that is clearly partisan or ideological in nature, a scandal connected to opponents of the party or ideology in question will be brought up. (This is related to rules already brought up, but developed independently from them.) **Governor Quinn’s Second Law on Political Posts** : The people who complain the most about the First Law tend not to be people who never used the First Law, but people who use it all the time. **Governor Quinn’s Third Law on Political Posts** : There is a direct and inverse relationship to the boldness about claims involving electoral success of a candidate, idea, or party in an election and how well-informed said poster is on politics as a whole. **Governor Quinn’s Fourth Law on Political Posts** : Discussions of historic politics of interest to a particular person will always be timed so that those with an interest will be in no position to immediately answer the question. ---
**Author:** ![phil417](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/6bbea6/32.png) [@phil417](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phil417)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2008, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-the-next-godwins-law/450843/56 "2008-06-01T03:32:30Z")
“The chance of a parent disiplining his unruly child in a public setting is often, but not always, directly proportional to the number of witnesses to the child’s behavior.” I’m not sure who I should attribute this to. Working at Walmart, I’ve seen parents ignoring their kids-gone-wild behavior until they realize someone else (usually me) is watching. Then I hear, “son, why you doing this? You know you NEVER act this way at home!” (huh? Bet me they do) Love, Phil [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/create-the-next-godwins-law/450843.md?page=2)