# Creative Suicide **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 15, 2000, 8:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-suicide/33286 "2000-09-15T08:24:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![nick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/f9ae1b/32.png) [@nick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nick)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2000, 8:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-suicide/33286/1 "2000-09-15T08:24:34Z")
If I were going to commit suicide, I would want it to be creative, hence memorable. So, I would personally jump off a tall building, with a rifle, into a densely populated portion of the city, trying to shoot as many people as possible before hitting the ground. Anyone else? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Mirth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e57/32.png) [@Mirth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mirth)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2000, 8:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-suicide/33286/2 "2000-09-15T08:53:44Z")
slide down a razor banister? ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2000, 8:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-suicide/33286/3 "2000-09-15T08:57:51Z")
One word: Hanson. ---
**Author:** ![yojimbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yojimbo/32/232_2.png) [@yojimbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yojimbo)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2000, 9:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-suicide/33286/4 "2000-09-15T09:01:34Z")
Get a laplander to bite your balls off ? ---
**Author:** ![Mousseduck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecc23a/32.png) [@Mousseduck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mousseduck)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2000, 11:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-suicide/33286/5 "2000-09-15T11:52:35Z")
I’d cover myself in blood and insult a man-eating shark. If that didn’t work, I could always drown in shame. ---
**Author:** ![pldennison](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9fc29f/32.png) [@pldennison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pldennison)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2000, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-suicide/33286/6 "2000-09-15T14:17:27Z")
According to one of the old AOL SDMBers (HpstrDufuz), the best suicide would be to duct tape a pair of cats to your chest and jump in the shower. ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2000, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-suicide/33286/7 "2000-09-15T15:32:12Z")
Three old men are sitting in rocking chairs at the nursing home, talking about how they’d want to die. The first man says “I’d want to be in a Porche, driving about 120, then drive into a tree.” The second man says “I’d like to be flying along in my Leer jet, and hit a mountain. I’d explode in a wonderful fireball.” The third man doesn’t say anything for awhile, and the other two think he’s nodded off, when he raises his eyebrow and says “I’d like to be shot by a jealous husband.” ---
**Author:** ![xizor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xizor/32/102_2.png) [@xizor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xizor)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2000, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-suicide/33286/8 "2000-09-15T15:47:10Z")
I would go up to Mike Tyson and tell him I was Lennox Lewis’ kid. ---
**Author:** ![chique](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/4491bb/32.png) [@chique](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chique)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2000, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-suicide/33286/9 "2000-09-15T15:48:00Z")
An old woman is all alone in the world and decides it’s time to commit suicide. After considering the myriad methods of offing herself she decides that shooting herself would be the quickest and easist way. She calls her doctor to ask him the best place to inflict the injury after explaining to him that she’s trying to write a book. Somewhat taken aback the doctor says, “Well, for you, it would be directly under your right breast.” Four hours later an old woman was admitted to the emergency room with a gun shot to her right knee. ---
**Author:** ![flup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/d07c76/32.png) [@flup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flup)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2000, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-suicide/33286/10 "2000-09-15T16:28:18Z")
I always wanted to swallow a hand grenade and then blow up. do you know how cool that would look? –Flup! ---
**Author:** ![August\_West](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/august_west/32/18069_2.png) [@August\_West](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/August_West)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2000, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-suicide/33286/11 "2000-09-15T16:56:03Z")
My dad had a guy once that tried to saw himself in half with a circular saw. Of course he flinched when the blade bit into his abdomen, and ended up being admitted with a deep abdominal laceration and… . . . . . . . . . A broken toe from dropping the saw!