# Creative writing - a form of toxic shock syndrome? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 12, 2000, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-writing-a-form-of-toxic-shock-syndrome/32836 "2000-09-12T00:39:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![G.Nome](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c89c15/32.png) [@G.Nome](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G.Nome)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2000, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-writing-a-form-of-toxic-shock-syndrome/32836/1 "2000-09-12T00:39:04Z")
A.k.a. Silent Bob gets a real dose I thought the Straight Dope was in creative writing remission but, no, TVeblen’s “holiday” means nothing to anyone but the Atlanta centre for disease control. I hear Silent Bob spent 3 days in isolation after his last greeting from TV. Alternatively, I was thinking that maybe this wordplay thing is contracted from pig’s blood. You dopers seem to have a life time’s supply. Candyboi, for one, took a hit equal to Sissy Spacek in 1976. His crime: poor spelling. I hear bad spellers were lynched in Mississippi as recently as 1962. And no-one knows if they ever got the vote. In which regard: The Simplified Spelling Society [http://www.les.aston.ac.uk/sss/](http://www.les.aston.ac.uk/sss/) You better watch out dopers - those gymnasium doors are in danger of closing on all goth marginalising, cardigan wearing, outsider generating, intolerant snobs. WaterJ2 are you ready? ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2000, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-writing-a-form-of-toxic-shock-syndrome/32836/2 "2000-09-12T00:44:19Z")
Allow me to be the first to say: What The FUCK is this all about? ---
**Author:** ![tiggeril](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tiggeril/32/7234_2.png) [@tiggeril](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiggeril)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2000, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-writing-a-form-of-toxic-shock-syndrome/32836/3 "2000-09-12T00:48:21Z")
Speaking of toxic shock… :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Alphagene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Alphagene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alphagene)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2000, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-writing-a-form-of-toxic-shock-syndrome/32836/4 "2000-09-12T03:38:23Z")
If you give an infinite amount of monkeys typing on an infinite amount of typewriters an infinte amount of time, you get _Hamlet_. If you give them three hours, you get a G. Nome post. I have a feeling that even if I understood what he was saying, I still wouldn’t like it. Good spelling is useless if the words you string together have no meaning, man. The only coherent sentence I was able to extract from that cacophany of verbiage is the implication that Veb is diseased. That’s a gratuitous insult and is enough to get a thread closed. Don’t do it again. ---
**Author:** ![waterj2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/858c86/32.png) [@waterj2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/waterj2)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2000, 5:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-writing-a-form-of-toxic-shock-syndrome/32836/5 "2000-09-12T05:21:56Z")
Why I do believe that I’ve been, uhhhh, can anyone tell me what G.Nome might have been implying about me? I’m going to take a stab in the dark and answer “yes, I’m ready.” After trying to figure out how my name might be related to Veb’s “holiday”, Silent\_bob, the Centre [sic] for Disease Control, Sissy Spaceck, the Simplified Spelling Society, Mississippi, or anyone who has ever worn a cardigan, I think I’ve figured out that he’s calling me a snob. He also thinks I have marginalised a Goth or two, wear a cardigan, am intolerant, and generate outsiders. I don’t understand what it means to generate outsiders, so I’ll let that slide. I may have unwittingly marginalised a Goth at some point, so I won’t object to that. Snobbery and intolerance are rather subjective, so I’ll just assume that he understands my posts as well as he writes, so that’s not necessarily wrong. However, I will strongly object to being characterised as someone who wears cardigans. Simply put, I have never, to the best of my knowledge, in my entire life, worn a cardigan. They just look kind of stupid. What the fuck do you take me for? Stop littering this message board with nonsense. Now for the enjoyment of all, I put the OP through Babelfish to get from English (questionably) to Spanish to English to German to French to English again: > [@](#): > > A.k.a. of Bob calm reached thought an amount I Juste that right drug in the creative decree of the letter was however, does not represent No, of TVeblen’ S for " holidays " all with each possible person however in the medium of atlanta aiming at the orientation of the disease. I hear that Bob calms 3 days alternative who was led by the television apparatus, thought spent in the localization after his greeting which the contract of those is perhaps concluded wordplay thing by blood from the pig. It which appears they dopers like, to have the source of a time of the lifespan. Candyboi, one, took Sissy Spacek in 1976 same impact. Its crime: bad Spelling. I hear that they were as recently the bad alphabets lynched in the Mississippi as in 1962. And nobody knows, if they always received the voice. In which respect: The simplified company of Spelling [http://www.les.aston.ac.uk/sss/lui](http://www.les.aston.ac.uk/sss/lui) improvement of the donors of synchronization apart from that dopers - these gates of the college are the foreigner marginalizes who fixes it, in the danger to close in all goth, rebeca which carries far, snobsintolerantes. Are WaterJ2 you ready to start? ---
**Author:** ![G.Nome](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c89c15/32.png) [@G.Nome](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G.Nome)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2000, 5:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-writing-a-form-of-toxic-shock-syndrome/32836/6 "2000-09-12T05:50:55Z")
Why didn’t this get a “thread” closed alphagene: “The lunatic misassociations, the stellar illogic! the absolute lack of fact or documentation combined so whimsicallly with petulance! the giddy blend of prejudice, junk science and paranoia! Please, I beg of you, do not discourage her from posting here. Putzes of this caliber don’t come along that often. Trolls abound, but true raving lunatics? We have a rare specimen here. I suggest we put G.Nome in a Mason jar (okay, punch a few holes in the lid) and observe her, much as we would a peculiarly replusive but interesting insect. (No offense to insects.) Awaiting with bated breath G.Nome’s further enormities, Veb” Go on, why didn’t it? Are your IQs all in imperial measurement or something? Are you going to give us the metric? I can’t believe they give computer science degrees to people who waste their time jumbling up sentences. Although perhaps “give” is the word. And I can’t believe they give jobs to moderators (if that is what alphagene is) who use profession of ignorance as a form of persecution. ---
**Author:** ![G.Nome](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c89c15/32.png) [@G.Nome](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G.Nome)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2000, 6:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-writing-a-form-of-toxic-shock-syndrome/32836/7 "2000-09-12T06:07:43Z")
Or this alphagene: "::wipes tear from eye:: yes, indeed, the martyrdom of illogic, suffering slings and arrows; Our Lady Of The Bleeding Anus. " That’s very unlibrarian-like in my book anyway. In fact, it’s downright disgusting. There are half a million posts here - at least it says that on the homepage. Why would you expect to understand them all? Don’t call me unintelligent or threaten me just because you are unable to. I’ve come to accept there must be enormous and unexpected cultural differences between Americans and other westerners - it’s all so…anthropological. P.S. I’ll do it again if I want to. It’s just so much fun. Yes yes yes ---
**Author:** ![G.Nome](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c89c15/32.png) [@G.Nome](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G.Nome)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2000, 6:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-writing-a-form-of-toxic-shock-syndrome/32836/8 "2000-09-12T06:15:25Z")
Yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes ---
**Author:** ![G.Nome](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c89c15/32.png) [@G.Nome](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G.Nome)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2000, 7:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-writing-a-form-of-toxic-shock-syndrome/32836/9 "2000-09-12T07:23:08Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Coldfire \* > \*\*Allow me to be the first to say: What The FUCK is this all about? \*\* It’s about how nobody but an American is allowed to communicate and be understood in metaphorical language. No-one. Ever. And it’s about how Straight Dope people are real patriots Because they’re heads of the class, they’re popular they’re quarterbacks, they’re popular They’re never last picked They’re cheerleading chicks They’re the party stars, they’re popular they’ve got their own cars they’re popular They’ll never get caught, they’re popular They’re teacher’s pets, they make football bets But you can still fuck them off electronically. In fact, I’d recommend it. I’ve really pampered myself today though. I should give it a rest. Well, I must be going, I can feel my legs moving etc etc. ---
**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2000, 7:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-writing-a-form-of-toxic-shock-syndrome/32836/10 "2000-09-12T07:46:44Z")
G.Nome, We have talked before. sometimes, I even understand you. But you seem to be missing the point. This communication medium is exclusive to the written word. Some people have a hard time understanding you. I am one of them. I’m all for creative writing, but you have to be able to write normally first. Did you start this thread to get a negative reaction? answer: yes evidence: > [@](#): > > Why didn’t this get a “thread” closed alphagene you started this thread to provoke Alpha. > [@](#): > > But you can still fuck them off electronically. In fact, I’d recommend it Enjoy reading our responses to your drivel? Well dont enjoy them too much. you’ll go blind. G. Nome, buddy, Start participating. If you think you have something to add, please do. but continually starting threads that no one can understand what your saying will only lead to toasted tighty-whiteys, and no-one likes that. Everybody gets your references, but they just dont have anything to do with anything. I’m off for a coffee. ---
**Author:** ![Primaflora](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/898d66/32.png) [@Primaflora](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Primaflora)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2000, 7:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-writing-a-form-of-toxic-shock-syndrome/32836/11 "2000-09-12T07:52:58Z")
well I am a fellow Antipodean and I am still going what the fuck is all this about? A metaphor is pretty fucking useless if nobody gets it. ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2000, 7:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-writing-a-form-of-toxic-shock-syndrome/32836/12 "2000-09-12T07:56:09Z")
I, for one, understand G. Nome completely. What’s my secret? I hit myself in the head with a mallet a dozen times or so. ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2000, 8:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-writing-a-form-of-toxic-shock-syndrome/32836/13 "2000-09-12T08:39:49Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by G. Nome \* > **Are your IQs all in imperial measurement or something? Are you going to give us the metric?** IQ’s are neither metric nor Imperial, shit-fer-brains. Not that the translation would get yours out of the _“Drooling Idiot”_ Bracket, anyway. I am a Doper, and I am not an American. Yet, I speak in metaphores all the time. Let me illustrate: “G. Nome is first in line at the Welfare Office of Intelligence - he needs a subsidy, and he needs it now.” I think few Dopers have a problem understanding THIS foreigner. But hey, you’re probably going to tell me I have been brainwashed by these Evil Yankees. ---
**Author:** ![G.Nome](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c89c15/32.png) [@G.Nome](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G.Nome)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2000, 12:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-writing-a-form-of-toxic-shock-syndrome/32836/14 "2000-09-12T12:01:20Z")
If my IQ is dropping it’s because people like you have a desperate, osmotic need to suck it out of anything that gets close. There, does that make you feel better? Laying face down on the floor also works. I make you really uncomfortable don’t I? So, maybe, did the people who put up with you before you went on-line. Why are you here? Does it feel all cosy and waspish? All gothless and cybery and colorless and nice? Really, really nice? There’s a difference, though, between niceness and appetite suppression isn’t there? If this ain’t Judith Craig it’s getting pretty close to it. This post is retributive - that’s all it is. An effect of a cause. But you don’t care to know it and that just makes you boring. Now, don’t get all jittery - but I mean DEAD boring. Find yourselves a literal thinker’s support group. ---
**Author:** ![G.Nome](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c89c15/32.png) [@G.Nome](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G.Nome)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2000, 12:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-writing-a-form-of-toxic-shock-syndrome/32836/15 "2000-09-12T12:05:18Z")
"This POST is retributive - that’s all it is. An effect of a cause.’ should read This THREAD is retributive … ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2000, 12:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-writing-a-form-of-toxic-shock-syndrome/32836/16 "2000-09-12T12:32:16Z")
If we bore you so much, why don’t you just shut the fuck up and LEAVE? ---
**Author:** ![Profane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e47774/32.png) [@Profane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Profane)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2000, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-writing-a-form-of-toxic-shock-syndrome/32836/17 "2000-09-12T13:06:03Z")
For those who are wondering what this is all about, check [this](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=34238) thread. ---
**Author:** ![Homer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/df788c/32.png) [@Homer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homer)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2000, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-writing-a-form-of-toxic-shock-syndrome/32836/18 "2000-09-12T14:38:51Z")
G. Nome, you make me giggle like an idiot. Send me another e-mail, k? I wanna talk to you some more. I love how you quoted “Popular” by Nada Surf. I think 10 people, in all, have heard that song. I, for one, have it on mp3. –Tim ---
**Author:** ![castle\_bravo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7ab992/32.png) [@castle\_bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/castle_bravo)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2000, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-writing-a-form-of-toxic-shock-syndrome/32836/19 "2000-09-12T22:14:38Z")
G. Nome, I really don’t understand your statement that everyone on the straight dope is popular. I would not consider myself popular at all. I have friends, sure, but not popular ones or anything. I’m definately \not\ a teacher’s pet, and I don’t bet on football games. goth’s, as you so lovingly call them, do not offend me (most of the time, but then who doesn’t?) in fact, I have some good friends who would consider themselves goths. just remember that everyone is equal on the sdmb and the reason you’re getting flamed is because of posts like this that ask for it. ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2000, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-writing-a-form-of-toxic-shock-syndrome/32836/20 "2000-09-12T22:32:16Z")
> [@](#): > > G. Nome, you make me giggle like an idiot. Why does this not surprise me, Homer? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creative-writing-a-form-of-toxic-shock-syndrome/32836.md?page=2)