# Credit card FUBAR, how can this happen? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 16, 2017, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/credit-card-fubar-how-can-this-happen/804634 "2017-12-16T14:23:05Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2017, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/credit-card-fubar-how-can-this-happen/804634/21 "2017-12-17T17:08:25Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > It’s interesting that essentially all the people jumping up and down that this is fraud are female and most of the folks asserting innocent error are male. > > I wonder what that means? Uh, we don’t trust your sorry asses:)! ---
**Author:** ![watchwolf49](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e9c0ed/32.png) [@watchwolf49](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/watchwolf49)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2017, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/credit-card-fubar-how-can-this-happen/804634/22 "2017-12-18T14:59:25Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > It’s interesting that essentially all the people jumping up and down that this is fraud are female and most of the folks asserting innocent error are male. > > I wonder what that means? > [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Uh, we don’t trust your sorry asses:)! Perhaps the thing missing in the OP is the browbeating … none of this “if you loved me you wouldn’t doubt me” or “just pay it, honey-dear, it will work out in the end” … just because the b/f is keeping all the bank statements under lock and key doesn’t mean he’s about ready to leave or anything … you wimin are just being too damn suspicious, learn to be trusting, don’t always assume the man is lying, or it gets to the point that men have to lie just to be believed … If the b/f had anything to hide, he’d have a post office box that you don’t know about … see how loving he is to your feelings? … ---
**Author:** ![StusBlues](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@StusBlues](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StusBlues)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2017, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/credit-card-fubar-how-can-this-happen/804634/23 "2017-12-18T15:48:55Z")
This may not be relevant, but one time when I was visiting my folks, I made a purchase for my mother and put it on my Amazon VISA. My mom wrote me a check for the amount. Rather than deposit the check and pay the charge through my bank account, I just endorsed the check over to VISA and sent it in with my statement. Sure enough, they credited my mom’s VISA account. Uff da. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2017, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/credit-card-fubar-how-can-this-happen/804634/24 "2017-12-18T16:53:30Z")
The OP’s post is from Sat and the purchases themselves were from a couple weeks before that. I wonder when we’ll get an update and what it’ll be? The good news is that since these are business purchases for the BF’s business it’s pretty certain he’d keep the receipts so some independent verification is at least possible. ---
**Author:** ![DummyGladHands](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/49beb7/32.png) [@DummyGladHands](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DummyGladHands)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2017, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/credit-card-fubar-how-can-this-happen/804634/25 "2017-12-18T17:10:41Z")
LSLguy nailed it. When I went in they said “you’re not in the computer” & I said just use R\_\_\_\_\_\_ Construction. So my card got hooked up to his account. When he called in for equipment delivery they hit my card. So they’ve sent the invoices & we OK’d them & they’ve been routed to his card. My card has been removed & essentially it’s my lazy ass’s fault. This shit always happens on the weekend when no one is around to handle it, don’t it? Off to deal ith my CC company. I’ve had 2 husbands,neither trustworthy, both now deceased. I trust NO ONE in my life as much as this man. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2017, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/credit-card-fubar-how-can-this-happen/804634/26 "2017-12-18T18:11:31Z")
> [@DummyGladHands](#): > > I’ve had 2 husbands,neither trustworthy, both now deceased. Whoa. You play hardball, girl. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2017, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/credit-card-fubar-how-can-this-happen/804634/27 "2017-12-18T20:06:12Z")
And here **Beck** said that \*men \*were not to be trusted. Just call her **BlackWidowGladHands** from now on. :eek: 😃 Serously, glad to hear the explanation for the confusion was logical \*and \*honest. One of my favorite old sayings is “Never attribute to malice what can be explained by incompetence”. Even if the potential malicious actor is different from the potential incompetent one. Humanity is not made of angels. But the idjits outnumber the crooks by a huge margin. And are much less selective about plying their trade. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2017, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/credit-card-fubar-how-can-this-happen/804634/28 "2017-12-18T20:16:43Z")
> [@Thudlow\_Boink](#): > > Is it safe to assume there’s no chance he might have been carrying your card (like if you’d inadvertently switched cards after paying at a restaurant, or something like that)? This actually happened with me and my Aunt during a brief period we were living together. We use the same brand of credit card. It took a couple of weeks to figure it out. The way it happened, her husband was reviewing purchases and noticed a bill for therapy. “Um, honey, are you secretly going to therapy and not telling me?” Figuring out who owed whom what was kind of a mess. To the OP, glad the issue was resolved. I was scratching my head on the ‘‘two different banks.’’ ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2017, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/credit-card-fubar-how-can-this-happen/804634/29 "2017-12-18T20:46:53Z")
My Aged MIL had the same thing happen a few years ago with another inmate at the independent living place where she lived. All the old ladies went out to a group lunch. Most had CCs issued by the bank across the street from the home. Most ordered the “senior lunch special”. So most everyone’s card and lunch bill looked about like anyone elses. You can guess what happened next. A few people came home with their own credit cards. But not many. Cue slow motion chaos as the monthly bills trickled in and some folks paid attention, others didn’t, and in many cases younger family members living elsewhere were responsible for paying the bills and didn’t think anything looked wrong. One old lady’s monthly purchases look a lot like another’s. Pills at the local Walgreens, a stop at the local grocery store, a couple of lunches out, etc. This was before the advent of lots of amazon subscription stuff, so there wasn’t even that clue that something was awry. Rumor had it that 6 months later there were still a couple of people who hadn’t gotten fully squared up. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2017, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/credit-card-fubar-how-can-this-happen/804634/30 "2017-12-18T22:00:38Z")
Well I feel like a heel! ---
**Author:** ![Balthisar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/balthisar/32/2825_2.png) [@Balthisar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balthisar)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2017, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/credit-card-fubar-how-can-this-happen/804634/31 "2017-12-18T23:55:46Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > My credit cards are in a wallet app on my iPhone. Anytime one of my cards is used, I get a pop up message on my phone. It’s very handy. It also gives tip calculations if I’m in a tipping situation. Which app is that? I only get notifications if I use Wallet to pay (i.e., pay with ApplePay). I could set my Chase app to notify me, but I set all of those high to avoid the noise. No way to clear alerts without opening the app. ---
**Author:** ![Dag\_Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@Dag\_Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dag_Otto)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2017, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/credit-card-fubar-how-can-this-happen/804634/32 "2017-12-19T04:11:08Z")
Chase cards can also send email notifications, which are easier to clear than opening a credit card app. And put me in with the group that originally thought the BF was not on the level. But after several years on the Dope I finally learned to hold my tongue. For once. And just in time as I do not want to get on the OP’s shit list. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2017, 11:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/credit-card-fubar-how-can-this-happen/804634/33 "2017-12-19T11:16:03Z")
> [@Balthisar](#): > > Which app is that? I only get notifications if I use Wallet to pay (i.e., pay with ApplePay). > > I could set my Chase app to notify me, but I set all of those high to avoid the noise. No way to clear alerts without opening the app. It’s the Capital One Mobile App, located in the iPhone Wallet. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/credit-card-fubar-how-can-this-happen/804634.md?page=1)