# Creepiest Commercials
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-commercials/325717
**Category:** Cafe Society
**Created:** [October 11, 2005, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-commercials/325717 "2005-10-11T04:54:26Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Loopydude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopydude)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2005, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-commercials/325717/1 "2005-10-11T04:54:26Z")
Inspired by [this](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=339001) thread.
Yes, the [King](http://www.bkmasks.com/) is truly one of the most disturbing pitchmen to hit the airwaves in many a year, and perhaps we can talk about him more in this thread too (though I don’t want to steal thunder from the other thread).
I will nominate [Bob](http://www.enzyte.com/bobtv.html), the face of Enzyte, an herbal product for “natural male enhancement”, as another supremely creepy “spokesman”. Bob walks around with a maniacal grin on his face 24/7, and you just know he’s got a giant woody in his pants the whole time. The guy’s psychotic, wild-eyed mug, leering at me from the set like a Viagra-blitzed Cheshire Cat, makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. When the rest of his pals get that turgid nutbar expression and join a conga line, I’m about ready to run screaming from the room.
So, what ad campaigns have left you more edgy than eager? Who’s sales pitches have made you cringe and recoil rather than reach for the cash?
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### Author:  [@priapus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/priapus)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2005, 8:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-commercials/325717/2 "2005-10-11T08:47:47Z")
any kid product commercial that has adults in it.I just think of all those years of acting classes and this poor person ends up having to act around some punk,smart ass kid making him(her ) look stupid,especially in cereal commercials
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### Author:  [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2005, 9:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-commercials/325717/3 "2005-10-11T09:25:27Z")
Any diaper commercial with infants being dubbed by adults doing “baby” voices. Creepy AND crappy.
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### Author:  [@FlyingRamenMonster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FlyingRamenMonster)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2005, 10:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-commercials/325717/4 "2005-10-11T10:03:22Z")
[QUOTE=Loopydude]
I will nominate [Bob](http://www.enzyte.com/bobtv.html), the face of Enzyte, an herbal product for “natural male enhancement”, as another supremely creepy “spokesman”. Bob walks around with a maniacal grin on his face 24/7, and you just know he’s got a giant woody in his pants the whole time. The guy’s psychotic, wild-eyed mug, leering at me from the set like a Viagra-blitzed Cheshire Cat, makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. When the rest of his pals get that turgid nutbar expression and join a conga line, I’m about ready to run screaming from the room.
Maybe I’m just odd, but I can’t even _look_ at that site without being paralysed by laughter. Man. He LOOKS like he has a boner. I can’t stop imagining him surreptitiously masturbating in every photo there.
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### Author:  [@Carm6773](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carm6773)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2005, 10:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-commercials/325717/5 "2005-10-11T10:05:22Z")
The one where the lady uses the garbage disposal as a blender to make a smoothie. YECH!!!
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### Author:  [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2005, 10:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-commercials/325717/6 "2005-10-11T10:16:31Z")
This is old, but the Nissan (I think) commercial with the little boy going down into a cave full of cars. That didn’t make me want to buy a car, it made me cringe and want to call the police.
Robin
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### Author:  [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2005, 10:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-commercials/325717/7 "2005-10-11T10:34:03Z")
> [@csharpmajor](#):
>
> Maybe I’m just odd, but I can’t even _look_ at that site without being paralysed by laughter. Man. He LOOKS like he has a boner. I can’t stop imagining him surreptitiously masturbating in every photo there.
Really? Because the guys I’ve seem masturbating (and i’ve seen a few…in my time…) tend to look less like this 😃 and more like this :o .
I think it’s the fact that he looks like this 😃 that makes it so creepy. And why this :o is not the masturbation smilie is beyond me.
Damn. I had a whole list of commercials that creeped me out and now I can’t think of any of them…can I get back to you?
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### Author:  [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2005, 11:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-commercials/325717/8 "2005-10-11T11:03:21Z")
That Brawny commercial. Do the makers of Brawny want me to clean with the paper towels or masterbate with them? The cleaning up of the big, white dollop of “frosting” goes beyond suggestion.
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### Author:  [@Chanteuse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chanteuse)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2005, 11:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-commercials/325717/9 "2005-10-11T11:22:40Z")
That new Bailey’s Irish Cream commercial–the woman wants that last drop of Bailey’s hanging from the bottle, but instead of just swiping it with her finger, she lays back with her mouth open wide so the bartender can pour it in (someone else catches the drop in his glass before it reaches her mouth). Yeah, yeah, I get the blow job reference, but that ain’t what I want to imagine when I’m drinking.
(OK, giving or getting head, maybe–drinking jizz from a bottle, no thanks!)
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### Author:  [@tarragon918](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tarragon918)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2005, 12:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-commercials/325717/10 "2005-10-11T12:37:31Z")
My cringe-inducing commercial is back on the air again - or was, for Columbus Day sales. I’m talking about the Mattress Warehouse/Mattress Discounters ad where the lady first is narrowly missed by the swinging board, then she just misses stepping on the uncovered manhole, then she notices Mattress Warehouse sale going on, and steps out into the street - into the path of a car and is struck by the vehicle! Then she shows up in the store to pick out a mattress! Very creepy and cringe-inducing - they actually show her getting hit by the car/van (or whatever it is … I must confess that I’ve never been able to watch that part, I always close my eyes). Not to mention, too, that it’s insensitive of those who’ve lost loved ones to pedestrian accidents. ☹
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### Author:  [@JThunder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JThunder)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2005, 12:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-commercials/325717/11 "2005-10-11T12:39:52Z")
Anything involving the ill-fated Puttermans.
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### Author:  [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2005, 1:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-commercials/325717/12 "2005-10-11T13:07:19Z")
The David Spade/Capital One ads have gone far afield of any product salesmanship and now exist in their own twisted, stale little world. Any day now I expect the lifeless, smoking carcass of Chubsie to tumble out of a phone closet, bound with electrical cables, the words **WHAT’S IN YOUR WALLET?** scrawled in magic marker across his forehead.
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### Author:  [@UntouchedTakeaway](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UntouchedTakeaway)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2005, 1:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-commercials/325717/13 "2005-10-11T13:40:56Z")
Hands down - Digger the Dermatophyte for Lamasil. Every time he pries up that big toenail - eeek!
VCNJ~
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### Author:  [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2005, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-commercials/325717/14 "2005-10-11T14:05:23Z")
There is something just wrong about the [spokesfamily](http://web.archive.org/web/20030601164708/www.mrbrainsfaggots.com/faggot_family.htm) for Mr. Brain’s Faggots. Plus the name of the product itself is disturbing.
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### Author:  [@Beadalin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beadalin)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2005, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-commercials/325717/15 "2005-10-11T14:15:51Z")
Not a commercial, but still.
I had a copy of _Allure_ magazine. You know all those perfume and cologne ads, where one side of the paper is folded over so you can open it to smell the scent?
This ad featured a woman basking on blue water, under a blue sky, wearing a white dress that’s billowing in the breeze. The headline over her says something like, “Succumb to the freshness.” Complete with the little scented fold-over thingy. I turn the page, and see on the back that this is an ad for SCENTED TAMPONS! Jebus! I don’t want to smell that, no matter how flower-like and “fresh!” Yecch!
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### Author:  [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2005, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-commercials/325717/16 "2005-10-11T14:21:43Z")
> [@Ponder Stibbons](#):
>
> There is something just wrong about the [spokesfamily](http://web.archive.org/web/20030601164708/www.mrbrainsfaggots.com/faggot_family.htm) for Mr. Brain’s Faggots. Plus the name of the product itself is disturbing.
“Hundreds of families entered the nationwide search, resulting in a nail-biting final. The Doody family from Dudley, Wolverhampton beat off stiff competition to take their place as The Faces of Mr Brain’s Faggots. Frederick, Janet, Lewis, and Grace demonstrated absolute fanaticism for faggots as they took part in creating a Mr. Brain’s Faggots commercial, role-plays and quizzes.”
“Janet Doody. Favourite Faggot: On their own, as a snack.”
Jeez, I feel like I’m in Junior High all over again.
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### Author:  [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2005, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-commercials/325717/17 "2005-10-11T14:36:51Z")
The recent commercials for **Burger King** and **Quaker Oats** with those oversized, immobile plastic faces are way beyiond creepy. If I saw one of those suddenly appear in front of me, I’d instinctively punch them in the face and run.
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### Author:  [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2005, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-commercials/325717/18 "2005-10-11T15:38:06Z")
The ones where they’re encouraging parents to take out a life insurance policy on their child. There’s some situations where reassurances of financial reimbursement could’t possibly even be a consideration, thank you very much.
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### Author:  [@h.sapiens](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/h.sapiens)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2005, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-commercials/325717/19 "2005-10-11T15:41:01Z")
The stupid talking baby on the Quizno’s commercials.
And the “Eat Beef” Boston Market commercial. I just can’t watch that woman chowing down on a big ol’ piece of cow flesh. Yuck.
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### Author:  [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2005, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-commercials/325717/20 "2005-10-11T15:42:44Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#):
>
> The recent commercials for **Burger King** and **Quaker Oats** with those oversized, immobile plastic faces are way beyiond creepy. If I saw one of those suddenly appear in front of me, I’d instinctively punch them in the face and run.
Those faces are hard and you’ll hurt your hand. Kick them in the shins and run.
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