# Creepiest possibly slash pairings **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 18, 2008, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-possibly-slash-pairings/468577 "2008-10-18T23:37:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Silver\_Tyger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/fbc32d/32.png) [@Silver\_Tyger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Tyger)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-possibly-slash-pairings/468577/101 "2008-10-20T17:55:54Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > I checked, and they’re all in California, so I have a small antimatter meteor in cloaked geosynchronous orbit ready to oblterate the lot of them (and also Disney studios). I’m just waiting for you to go on vacation. I mean, you haven’t actaully SAID “Skaldimus, please don’t accidentally murder me during one of your massively disproporation acts of vengeance,” but I took it as a given. Was I wrong? > > Also, what Risha said. Well damn then. Can you use a couple of smaller explosives? Cuz I can’t afford to leave. Or, y’know, pay for my vacation. And for my friends in that area (they’re not tcats fans, but I’m their son’s best friend, or so he says.) You’re just trying to tempt me into reading it. I know you are! And then I’ll read it and it’ll be some horrible brain-breaking thing. Well, I’m not falling for it. So there. (actually I am. I have no shame and I apparently enjoy the sensation of my brainmeats trying to escape through my ears.) ---
**Author:** ![BaneSidhe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c5a1d2/32.png) [@BaneSidhe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BaneSidhe)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-possibly-slash-pairings/468577/102 "2008-10-20T17:59:36Z")
I got a couple—Steve Jobs/Bill Gates and Al Gore/Jon Bon Jovi. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-possibly-slash-pairings/468577/103 "2008-10-20T18:11:33Z")
> [@Silver Tyger Girl](#): > > Well damn then. Can you use a couple of smaller explosives? Cuz I can’t afford to leave. Or, y’know, pay for my vacation. And for my friends in that area (they’re not tcats fans, but I’m their son’s best friend, or so he says.) That’s not how vengeance works. When you drag the goat all the way up to the top of Mount Vengeance-Swearing and swear to the dark gods that you will have your vengeance, you have to specify the means right then, because, obviously, you’re asking Nemesis to supply materiel. Once you file the plans, that’s it; no changies and no do-overs. I’m stretching the rules by going out of my way to spare YOU the worst of it. > [@](#): > > You’re just trying to tempt me into reading it. I know you are! And then I’ll read it and it’ll be some horrible brain-breaking thing. Well, I’m not falling for it. So there. (actually I am. I have no shame and I apparently enjoy the sensation of my brainmeats trying to escape through my ears.) Read it! I promise, there is NO child molestation or bestiality in it. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-possibly-slash-pairings/468577/104 "2008-10-20T18:22:52Z")
> [@Risha](#): > > I generally find it pretty icky too, but I can offer you at least one good one: [Alternative Lifestyle](http://bbfarchive.dbfandom.com/archive/0/alternativelifestyle.html), by A.C. Chapin. That was nice. Thanks. ---
**Author:** ![Risha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/5fc32e/32.png) [@Risha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Risha)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-possibly-slash-pairings/468577/105 "2008-10-20T18:28:21Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > That was nice. Thanks. Bwahahaha! My plan to corrupt you all with examples of good stories with bad pairings is gaining traction. (And you’re welcome. 🙂 ) ---
**Author:** ![zamboniracer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e9a140/32.png) [@zamboniracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zamboniracer)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-possibly-slash-pairings/468577/106 "2008-10-20T18:30:11Z")
Going way back, the original slash pairing of Kirk & Spock always icked me out. Buffy/Giles bothers me not a bit. President Bartlet with Toby Ziegler would want to make me gouge my own eyes out too. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-possibly-slash-pairings/468577/107 "2008-10-20T18:36:05Z")
> [@Risha](#): > > Bwahahaha! My plan to corrupt you all with examples of good stories with bad pairings is gaining traction. > > (And you’re welcome. 🙂 ) I’m already corrupt. Who do you think keeps stealing your keys? Anyway, vengeance, bees, soon I shall open the Hellmouth, blah blah blah. [QUOTE=zamboniracer] Going way back, the original slash pairing of Kirk & Spock always icked me out. Buffy/Giles bothers me not a bit. [/QUOTE] At least Kirk & Spock are peers. A high-school Buffy with Giles would be a betrayal on at least two levels; a college Buffy with Giles would be even worse. ---
**Author:** ![kushiel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bbce88/32.png) [@kushiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kushiel)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-possibly-slash-pairings/468577/108 "2008-10-20T21:24:47Z")
Stuff I’ve seen, via being fanfic goatse’d (y’know, linked when you thought it was something else): Lucius/Draco squick fic. Literal squick fic. With an electric drill. Check urban dictionary when not at work. Relm/Interceptor. I swear to God I didn’t know it was in the fic. And I wanted to puke. Aragorn/Legolas, right after Legolas gets raped by orcs. Oh, unrealistic hurt/comfort fic… Various Final Fantasy VII females/chocobos. Well, at least they are old enough to consent. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-possibly-slash-pairings/468577/109 "2008-10-20T21:53:46Z")
There was a lot of Fenrir Greyback (the werewolf- very minor character) slash with Harry Potter characters, all male (Harry, Ron, Draco especially) for a while with some _really_ disturbing slash art as well. I learned about it from blogs. There was a lawsuit a few years ago having to do with _Boy Meets World_ slash. I never watched enough of the show to know much about the characters, but the suit involved the actor Ryder Strong (sp?), who was then a minor, suing because he was disturbed at the graphic depictions of his character having sex with a guy. IIRC it was thrown out of court because he doesn’t own the copyrights and evidently whichever network did didn’t feel the need to pursue it (at least not publically; they may have sent a “cease and desist”- if you google you can perhaps find more info). ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-possibly-slash-pairings/468577/110 "2008-10-20T22:25:04Z")
[This](http://bentandtwisted.us/hurt/hurtmain.htm). Andrew from Buffy/an alternate version of Cyclops, **and** Xander/Remy, **and** a three-way involving Clark Kent, Pyro, and a Borg clone, **and** … Do I win? ---
**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2008, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-possibly-slash-pairings/468577/111 "2008-10-20T23:16:13Z")
You have to picture these to understand creepy (Tops listed first in gay relationships): McCoy/Spock Sam/Frodo Pippin/Merry (Like either of these is a stretch). Smeagol/Elrond Palpatine/Amidala Jar-Jar/Annakin Fredo/Johnny Ola ---
**Author:** ![jackdavinci](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackdavinci/32/3259_2.png) [@jackdavinci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackdavinci)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2008, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-possibly-slash-pairings/468577/112 "2008-10-21T00:32:11Z")
> [@Soggy\_Biscuit](#): > > There’s a lot of sick people getting their kicks from pedophile porn with the excuse that it’s just fictional characters, or that they are reading it “ironically” because they think it’s humorous. Maybe you should take it to the pit. No real people (or cartoon animals or robots or werewolves or vampires) were harmed in the making of any erotic fiction or drawings. Take a deep breath and repeat “it’s all make believe…” ---
**Author:** ![Lucky\_13](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lucky_13/32/13209_2.png) [@Lucky\_13](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucky_13)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2008, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-possibly-slash-pairings/468577/113 "2008-10-21T04:42:18Z")
> [@Grumman](#): > > The absolute worst I’ve seen is Sasori/Sakura from Naruto. If you are writing about a pairing where one of the characters performs taxidermy with living people, it is incredibly creepy if you use words like “cute” to describe the pairing. I read a doujinshi featuring this pairing. :eek::eek::eek: ---
**Author:** ![devilsknew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/4da419/32.png) [@devilsknew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/devilsknew)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2008, 4:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-possibly-slash-pairings/468577/114 "2008-10-21T04:47:36Z")
Crispin Glover and Juliette Lewis. I don’t care what they do, I’d just like to ---
**Author:** ![Stauderhorse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce7236/32.png) [@Stauderhorse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stauderhorse)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2008, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-possibly-slash-pairings/468577/115 "2008-10-21T05:12:26Z")
> [@devilsknew](#): > > Crispin Glover and Juliette Lewis. > > I don’t care what they do, I’d just like to Come on man, don’t leave us hanging. ---
**Author:** ![Taber](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ac91a4/32.png) [@Taber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taber)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2008, 5:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-possibly-slash-pairings/468577/116 "2008-10-24T05:23:46Z")
> [@Max\_the\_Immortal](#): > > Calvin/Hobbes. > Now where did I put that brain bleach? I’ve seen Hobbes/Hobbes, and both were the tiger. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2008, 8:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-possibly-slash-pairings/468577/117 "2008-10-24T08:18:15Z")
Ro and Barclay! No, seriously, I wrote that and it was actually pretty good. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2008, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-possibly-slash-pairings/468577/118 "2008-10-24T15:57:49Z")
> [@Bryan\_Ekers](#): > > Ro and Barclay! > No, seriously, I wrote that and it was actually pretty good. I can see that happening; she could have decided she felt like abusing someone who would fight back completely ineffectually. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepiest-possibly-slash-pairings/468577.md?page=5)