# Creepy commercials **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 25, 2005, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-commercials/309817 "2005-06-25T18:17:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Sunshine\_and\_Smiles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Sunshine\_and\_Smiles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunshine_and_Smiles)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2005, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-commercials/309817/81 "2005-06-27T16:13:08Z")
> [@ZebraShaSha](#): > > Actually, he was an American citizen. (This was discussed here recently) > > If you had watched the Discovery Channel more, you would know that doesn’t even come close to the creepiest form of “The Greatest American” - even when considering Albert to be non-American. There is one form that has Oprah, George Bush, Bill Gates, and Thomas Edison all on the same one. I think. Regardless, it was one really important figure, George, and 2 iconic pop culture ones. > > I shouldn’t really get anymore into it, though, but there you have it. Well, golly. That IS worse. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Bird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Little\_Bird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Bird)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2005, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-commercials/309817/82 "2005-06-27T16:20:39Z")
> [@Sweetums](#): > > This topic has made the rounds before. > > ``` > One that makes me change the channel every time is the starburst comercial where the guy show the girl the sculpture of her that he made out of starburst, and then proceeds to eat the sculpture in front of her. > > :eek: > > ``` I actually laugh out loud at that commercial. Also–the one where the kid slingshots the Starburst at his friend and knocks him over. The this businessman comes running up to the knocked over kid, presumably to help him out, and picks the Starburst off the kid’s face. Then he pops it in his mouth and goes “MMM, Starburst!” and runs off again. Comedy Gold. The commercial that pisses me off right now is the one for detergent or whatever where these two women in a grocery store totally blindside this woman in a white shirt and rub fruit all over her. Then, of course, they wash her shirt and it’s _all better!_ The woman is just standing there with this bemused expression on her face during the whole fiasco and all I can think is if I were in her position, those women would have strawberries up their asses. ---
**Author:** ![Slacker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6bbea6/32.png) [@Slacker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slacker)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2005, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-commercials/309817/83 "2005-06-27T16:25:17Z")
I wasn’t bothered by it at first, but after seeing the latest [eHarmony.com](http://eHarmony.com) ad 1,000,000 times the proposal contained therein is a tad creepy. Something about his delivery. I want… to make… you my… wife. ---
**Author:** ![Ragiel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/6de8d8/32.png) [@Ragiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ragiel)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2005, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-commercials/309817/84 "2005-06-27T16:29:57Z")
> [@Khan](#): > > Primus used the same technique in their video for Wynona’s Big Brown Beaver. I thought it was CGI until I saw a “making of” documentary for the video. > > None of the commercials mentioned so far freak me out. That Burger King isn’t funny per se, but it always elicits a chuckle. Those spongmonkeys only made me want to smash the TV. > > What I always find disturbing are commercials where a mascot also happens to be whatever it’s trying to sell. Take Charlie the Tuna: he’s telling us to feast on his own kind. It strikes me as rather ghoulish. Is he selling out his neighbors to save himself? Does he take some kind of Hannibal-style satisfaction from seeing members of his species shredded, mixed with mayonnaise, and served to their predators between two slices of rye? > > Every time I see such an ad I think, “you murderous traitor.” Well, their tagline used to be, “Sorry, Charlie, only the **best** tuna get to be Starkist.” They used that so often, viewers could fill it in mentally. But that was a couple of generations ago. They really should rethink that one. ---
**Author:** ![sturmhauke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47c2d/32.png) [@sturmhauke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sturmhauke)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2005, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-commercials/309817/85 "2005-06-27T18:05:36Z")
> [@Slacker](#): > > I wasn’t bothered by it at first, but after seeing the latest [eHarmony.com](http://eHarmony.com) ad 1,000,000 times the proposal contained therein is a tad creepy. Something about his delivery. I want… to make… you my… wife. I’m sorry Jim, I can’t marry you. Starfleet wants to make me the lead scientist on a terraforming project, it’s too good to pass up. ---
**Author:** ![RandMcnally](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@RandMcnally](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandMcnally)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2005, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-commercials/309817/86 "2005-06-27T18:13:33Z")
The commercial I always found creepy was the Carls Jr. one with the baby still in the womb. 1: A fetus talking is never cute. 2: He talks about “taking something with him” when he comes out. 3: Dude, a talking fetus? ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2005, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-commercials/309817/87 "2005-06-27T18:14:10Z")
The **Welch’s Grape Juice Girl** is the 3rd sign of the Apocalypse. She freaks me out with her cutesy Animitronic Ways. ---
**Author:** ![ltfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@ltfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ltfire)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2005, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-commercials/309817/88 "2005-06-27T19:20:19Z")
> [@sturmhauke](#): > > I’m sorry Jim, I can’t marry you. Starfleet wants to make me the lead scientist on a terraforming project, it’s too good to pass up. …and…oh, I also have genital herpes… 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2005, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-commercials/309817/89 "2005-06-27T19:41:09Z")
> [@Little Bird](#): > > I were in her position, those women would have strawberries up their asses. I saw that one! _Fruit Fetish Freaks #8_, right? Awesome. I don’t know why they always have to get into the durian, though. That’s just wrong. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2005, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-commercials/309817/90 "2005-06-27T20:41:07Z")
> [@Sweetums](#): > > One that makes me change the channel every time is the starburst comercial where the guy show the girl the sculpture of her that he made out of starburst, and then proceeds to eat the sculpture in front of her. > > ``` > :eek: > > ``` I hate the one where various people morph into Chex Mix figures. Grotesque. ---
**Author:** ![Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troy_mcclure_sf/32/4150_2.png) [@Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troy_McClure_SF)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2005, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-commercials/309817/91 "2005-06-27T20:59:37Z")
I love the Burger King and the spungmunkeys. I will agree with the Gatorade commercial where people shatter on the ground. All I can think when I see those is “Man, if I were seven, I’d have nightmares for weeks.” > [@Dr. Rieux](#): > > Yeah, I’d like to find out just how dirty [the Orbit gim girl’s] mouth is…oops! Was that out loud? _HEY!_ That’s someone who looks a lot like my ex-girlfriend! Yeah, she’s hot. > [@Little Bird](#): > > …those women would have strawberries up their asses. Don’t knock it until you try it. ---
**Author:** ![Don\_Draper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Don\_Draper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_Draper)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2005, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-commercials/309817/92 "2005-06-27T21:10:37Z")
The commercial that repulsed me more than any other was the Playstation ads from a few years ago, for some video game called “Ernie the Earthworm” (or something like that). It shows a prim grandmotherly lady rocking & knitting…and stuffing her face with writhing, wiggly earthworms she plucked out a huge bowl of worms on her side table. Worse still, they often showed this ad around 5-6 pm, when I was cooking dinner. Boy that pissed me off. ---
**Author:** ![moonstarssun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b9bd4f/32.png) [@moonstarssun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moonstarssun)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2005, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-commercials/309817/93 "2005-06-27T21:45:45Z")
> [@wolf\_meister](#): > > This link is work safe but scores close to a perect ten on the Creep-O-Meter™ - well, we warned you: > [http://www.podster.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/fotos/tv\_zed.jpg](http://www.podster.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/fotos/tv_zed.jpg) Ew, ew, ew, ew, ew! I should have listened to your warning, but I just couldn’t resist. Now I’m going to keep thinking about that creepy grin all night. I also hate Digger, and the mucous blob in the lung is almost as bad. ---
**Author:** ![Khan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3ab097/32.png) [@Khan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khan)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2005, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-commercials/309817/94 "2005-06-27T22:07:08Z")
> [@Ragiel](#): > > Well, their tagline used to be, “Sorry, Charlie, only the **best** tuna get to be Starkist.” They used that so often, viewers could fill it in mentally. But that was a couple of generations ago. They really should rethink that one. That just makes him a suicidal collaborator. Not that I have any axe to grind with the fishing industry, it’s just that a tuna trying to sell us the corpses of his brethren, well… shit. I’d also like to bring up that Geico ad where that executive takes the Gecko with him to go visit that lady and her cats. They show the cats surrounding the Gecko menacingly while the guy talks to the lady, and then afterwards they show the Gecko all bandaged up. Did that guy help rescue him from the cats, or did that poor lizard have to fight his way out of there all by himself? See, I like that Gecko and I’m not too keen on seeing him come to any harm. Apart from that, I love the Geico commercials. ---
**Author:** ![Wolfian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/7ea924/32.png) [@Wolfian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wolfian)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2005, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-commercials/309817/95 "2005-06-27T22:42:01Z")
> [@Troy McClure SF](#): > > I love the Burger King and the spungmunkeys. I will agree with the Gatorade commercial where people shatter on the ground. All I can think when I see those is “Man, if I were seven, I’d have nightmares for weeks.” I just saw that commerical and my first thought was, “Yu-gi-Oh should sue.” The shattering effect is straight out of Yu-Gi-Oh, a popular Japanese animated fighting monster show, so I think most seven year olds are used to it. ---
**Author:** ![Superdude](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superdude/32/13450_2.png) [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2005, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-commercials/309817/96 "2005-06-28T00:10:10Z")
> [@Dr. Rieux](#): > > And having the creepy voice of Joel Murray coming out of those lips makes it even worse… Not to nitpick, but that’s Ken Hudson Campbell (“Lust” from [Herman’s Head](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0101115/)). ---
**Author:** ![mobo85](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2005, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-commercials/309817/97 "2005-06-28T02:19:06Z")
> [@Ragiel](#): > > Well, their tagline used to be, “Sorry, Charlie, only the **best** tuna get to be Starkist.” Actually, I believe Charlie was attempting to show he was a sophisticated fish, to which the reply was, “We don’t want tuna with good taste, we want tuna that taste good!” Why Mr. The Tuna wants to die and get eaten, I have no idea. ---
**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2005, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-commercials/309817/98 "2005-06-28T03:04:50Z")
> [@RandMcnally](#): > > The commercial I always found creepy was the Carls Jr. one with the baby still in the womb. > > 1: A fetus talking is never cute. > > 2: He talks about “taking something with him” when he comes out. > > 3: Dude, a talking fetus? Don’t forget: 1. He has a FRIEND. The fact that he is still in the womb has apparently not hampered his ability to meet individuals who share common interests (like, uh, what – floating in amniotic fluid?). ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2005, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-commercials/309817/99 "2005-06-28T03:33:34Z")
> [@Archergal](#): > > Whenever I see the new Quiznos commercial featuring Bob, the talking baby, I get creeped out. Something about him just makes my skin crawl. The spongmonkeys were delights by comparison. > > The new Burger King commercials, where the weird plastic-faced Burger King appears in a guy’s car is another one. \ > > Anybody else creeped out by some commercials? I can’t stand Talking Baby Bob either. Yeeesh! ---
**Author:** ![riserius1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7ab992/32.png) [@riserius1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/riserius1)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2005, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-commercials/309817/100 "2005-06-28T04:15:04Z")
There’s also the one for some cellular company that shows some girl choking in a restaurant;her boyfriend/husband gives her the Heimlich maneuver and mentions some deal the aforementioned company is promoting. A patron at the next table then begins to choke, and presumably the whole thing starts all over.While it’s not creepy, it’s certainly in poor taste. Chris W [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-commercials/309817.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-commercials/309817.md?page=6)