# "Creepy men" at Walmart **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 27, 2019, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-men-at-walmart/836160 "2019-06-27T15:37:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2019, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-men-at-walmart/836160/21 "2019-06-27T16:53:11Z")
> [@Dangerosa](#): > > I find it hilarious that we can shoot black teenagers in this country because we feel threatened, but put out a hypothetical where a guy follows a woman around in the store and if she clocks you with a can of green beans “oh, the humanity! It isn’t fair. He was just innocently following her through the store.” Well no, we can’t just shoot black children because we feel threatened, which is why it’s such a big deal that cops can do it in exchange for a paid unscheduled vacation. SImilarly, smacking Rando with a can just because it’s easier than dealing with the baggage that makes you afraid of him is also bad mojo. And lastly, memes, however hypothetical, which celebrate violence against “creepY” guys (aka Rando who looks funny or acts sorta reminiscent of a bad boyfriend from 20 years ago) need to be crushed. People are fucking stupid. They eat Tide pods and take train track selfies because the internet says to. ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2019, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-men-at-walmart/836160/22 "2019-06-27T16:56:54Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > If any ladies take the advice to mean that they should use physical violence when a man has \*technically \*not done anything illegal, they will soon learn that the law doesn’t necessarily favor those who are morally right but rather those who are legally right. Absolutely. Let’s not forget what the real danger here is, after all. It’s not that so many men routinely feel entitled to follow strange women around a store staring at them and often even engaging in criminal behavior such as sexual indecency or outright assaulting them, but rather that some woman somewhere might get the mistaken idea that she’d be justified in using violence against a strange guy creeping on her who has _technically_ not done anything illegal. Now **there** ’s something worth starting a condemnatory thread about. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2019, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-men-at-walmart/836160/23 "2019-06-27T17:02:36Z")
> [@Inigo\_Montoya](#): > > Well no, we can’t just shoot black children because we feel threatened, which is why it’s such a big deal that cops can do it in exchange for a paid unscheduled vacation. SImilarly, smacking Rando with a can just because it’s easier than dealing with the baggage that makes you afraid of him is also bad mojo. And lastly, memes, however hypothetical, which celebrate violence against “creepY” guys (aka Rando who looks funny or acts sorta reminiscent of a bad boyfriend from 20 years ago) need to be crushed. People are fucking stupid. They eat Tide pods and take train track selfies because the internet says to. Yeah, there’s always going to be that special one who believes they need to go shoot up the pizza place where children are being held as sex slaves. ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2019, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-men-at-walmart/836160/24 "2019-06-27T17:06:52Z")
> [@Kimstu](#): > > Absolutely. Let’s not forget what the real danger here is, after all. It’s not that so many men routinely feel entitled to follow strange women around a store staring at them and often even engaging in criminal behavior such as sexual indecency or outright assaulting them, but rather that some woman somewhere might get the mistaken idea that she’d be justified in using violence against a strange guy creeping on her who has _technically_ not done anything illegal. > > Now **there** ’s something worth starting a condemnatory thread about. You’re misinterpreting me - but I think you knew that. ---
**Author:** ![you\_with\_the\_face](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/ecccb3/32.png) [@you\_with\_the\_face](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/you_with_the_face)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2019, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-men-at-walmart/836160/25 "2019-06-27T17:10:03Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > If I man commits a assault, of course you can & should defend yourself. But no where in the meme was there any crime besides being 'creepY", which is entirely subjective. Aren’t you an adult? I ask because it’s not clear to me why anyone older than 10 would treat a meme like a PSA. Those stories posted by **Kimstu** make me shudder. ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2019, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-men-at-walmart/836160/26 "2019-06-27T17:19:55Z")
> [@you\_with\_the\_face](#): > > Those stories posted by **Kimstu** make me shudder. There’s a [million of them](https://www.reddit.com/r/LetsNotMeet/comments/agtpqk/creepy_man_at_walmart/): > [@](#): > > Without really thinking, I glanced over at the truck and there were two men, and I noticed the older (50-60ish) one, the driver, was calling to me and trying to get my attention. I’m a 19 year old female, for reference. I quickly dipped into the store. He was calling after me the entire time. Immediately warning bells in my head were blaring. > > I tried to get through the aisles fairly quick trying to lose him. But he found me multiple times and kept telling me how pretty I am, and asking things from how old I am to if I was in a relationship, or if I was interested in older men. Just being inappropriate in general. > > I’m normally a fairly shy person and get a little awkward in situations like this. I tried to keep to myself and tell him I wasn’t interested and to leave me alone to no avail. He ended up followed me through the checkout lines - just staring at me. > After checking out I finally asked one of the male employees to escort me to my car, which he did and the man finally left me alone. ---
**Author:** ![Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f475e1/32.png) [@Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jimmy_Chitwood)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2019, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-men-at-walmart/836160/27 "2019-06-27T17:28:48Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > No criminal offenses were alleged by the 'creep". > > If she had made up a crime that “creepy” guy was doing, fine, then you can make up ways to get back. If she had said some guy grabbed her, then fine, go for the can of beans or whatever. But being “creepy” is not a crime. And it’s entirely in your head. It’s all in whose head? You’re the one saying the damn thing is hypothetical. Are you suggesting no creepy guy ever engages in criminal behavior at a Walmart? Are you saying anything at all about any real world scenario, as far as you’re aware? ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2019, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-men-at-walmart/836160/28 "2019-06-27T17:32:53Z")
One of the best bits of advice I ever got from a cop: If some messes with you and you get angry, you’ll have the rest of your life to be scared. If my creep-o-meter goes off, I’m going to look you straight in the eye and raise my left (bad) hand in a fist, and scream “Get the hell away from me.” If you persist, my right (good) hand is going into your nose or stomach. Hard as I can do it. And all I have to tell the cops and/or judge is “I thought my right hand was being threatened.” It’s my stay out of jail card. ---
**Author:** ![Two\_Many\_Cats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8dc957/32.png) [@Two\_Many\_Cats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Two_Many_Cats)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2019, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-men-at-walmart/836160/29 "2019-06-27T17:34:25Z")
[Creepy guy being interrogated.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EeiNvfZ6Lc0) Enjoy! ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2019, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-men-at-walmart/836160/30 "2019-06-27T17:36:32Z")
#PeopleOfWalMart ---
**Author:** ![DrCube](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a3d4f5/32.png) [@DrCube](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrCube)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2019, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-men-at-walmart/836160/31 "2019-06-27T17:48:34Z")
> [@Dangerosa](#): > > I find it hilarious that we can shoot black teenagers in this country because we feel threatened, but put out a hypothetical where a guy follows a woman around in the store and if she clocks you with a can of green beans “oh, the humanity! It isn’t fair. He was just innocently following her through the store.” Can’t we be against unjustified violence of all sorts? I sure hope being followed in a store isn’t the standard here. Grocery stores are designed for all customers to take roughly the same path, which means that customers who show up at the same time will be “following” each other throughout their whole shopping trip, with no ill intent. By all means, if someone is sniffing your hair and masturbating to your children, feel free to get violent. But the ugly, older guy you saw shopping nearby multiple times during your shopping trip is probably just shopping. And to tie it all together with the atrocities committed by police across the country: _Feeling_ threatened isn’t enough. You have to actually _be_ threatened to justify committing violence. And yes, it’s an abomination that police in this country aren’t held to the same standard as the rest of us, but the standard remains. We should raise the standard for police, not lower it for everyone else. ---
**Author:** ![Royal\_Nonesutch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecb155/32.png) [@Royal\_Nonesutch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Royal_Nonesutch)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2019, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-men-at-walmart/836160/32 "2019-06-27T17:57:57Z")
> [@DrCube](#): > > By all means, if someone is sniffing your hair and masturbating to your children, feel free to get violent. “Pardon me sir, I hate to sound pushy or demanding, and I certainly pride myself on my open-mindedness and tolerance, (in fact one of my favorite shows is Modern Family) but if you don’t mind, your, umm, ‘Enthusiasm’ is making me and my child a little bit uncomfortable…” ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2019, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-men-at-walmart/836160/33 "2019-06-27T18:00:48Z")
I often wonder if men like the two fine Drs in this thread have wives, daughters, nieces or actually know any women at all who have come home and told them of the kinds of incidents described in this thread and still can’t stretch their empathy and understanding far enough to appreciate why some women would post hyperbolic rants at the very real risk of sending these two fine and obviously sensitive souls running to their safe spaces. Drs. Cube and Deth…word of advice… maybe delete your facebook accounts if you’re going to be triggered by this kind of stuff. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2019, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-men-at-walmart/836160/34 "2019-06-27T18:02:07Z")
I’d go with screaming “Get the hell away from us, you creep or I’m calling 911.” Very loudly. ---
**Author:** ![you\_with\_the\_face](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/ecccb3/32.png) [@you\_with\_the\_face](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/you_with_the_face)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2019, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-men-at-walmart/836160/35 "2019-06-27T18:11:50Z")
Are y’all reading the stories **Kimstu** is posting? Look, I’ll be the first to condemn any woman who starts in on the green bean throwing afterunfairly maligning a guy as a creep at Walmart. But until that happens, I don’t have any problems with telling woman to defend herself if a guy does shit like pinch her ass in the check out line after doggedly pursuing her in the store. FFS, the last thing a woman in this situation needs is to second guess the fear she’s feeling when she’s actually in danger. ---
**Author:** ![iiandyiiii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iiandyiiii/32/7924_2.png) [@iiandyiiii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iiandyiiii)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2019, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-men-at-walmart/836160/36 "2019-06-27T18:16:25Z")
Until there’s a rash (or even just a few examples) of women assaulting men who weren’t doing anything, it doesn’t seem reasonable to worry about this even close to as much as the worry about creepy men following women in stores and behaving lewdly, which quite clearly does happen disturbingly often. ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2019, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-men-at-walmart/836160/37 "2019-06-27T18:17:10Z")
> [@DrCube](#): > > I sure hope being followed in a store isn’t the standard here. Grocery stores are designed for all customers to take roughly the same path, which means that customers who show up at the same time will be “following” each other throughout their whole shopping trip, with no ill intent. True, and if you think about it for a moment, you’ll realize that that means that millions of women every day are being innocently “followed” through stores by millions of men **whom they _aren’t_ complaining about on the internet**. I mean, if women were constantly bitching that half the guys in the store are following them around every time they set foot in the place, you’d have a point. But that’s not what’s happening, because women generally don’t assume that men are being “creepy” just by virtue of walking through a store. > [@QuickSilver](#): > > I often wonder if men like the two fine Drs in this thread have wives, daughters, nieces or actually know any women at all who have come home and told them of the kinds of incidents described in this thread and still can’t stretch their empathy and understanding far enough to appreciate why some women would post hyperbolic rants at the very real risk of sending these two fine and obviously sensitive souls running to their safe spaces. And honorable mention to **Inigo Montoya** ’s condescending sneers about the poor little dears simply not wanting to “deal with the baggage that makes [them] afraid” of random men who are just innocently acting “sorta reminiscent of a bad boyfriend from 20 years ago”. Because the problem, of course, isn’t that vast numbers of women are **actually** getting creeped on by strangers whose behavior often veers into the deliberately intimidating and outright criminal: no, it’s that the silly wimminz are so apt to be frightened of harmless men for no valid reason at all, probably due to the natural defects of their ladybrains. ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2019, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-men-at-walmart/836160/38 "2019-06-27T18:17:43Z")
In a world where women are indeed treated like prey, fear is a gift. Asking a woman to override her fear instinct and give that creepy guy a chance is beyond ridiculous. Women don’t confront men they can easily escape from, it’s too often life threatening. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2019, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-men-at-walmart/836160/39 "2019-06-27T18:23:37Z")
> [@Kimstu](#): > > Well, if you do a little more looking around for reports of experiences on the general theme of “creepy guys at Walmart”, you may get a better idea of the sorts of the behavior that most of the people sharing and applauding this meme may be more aware of than you seem to be. > > Here’s [another](https://www.reddit.com/r/LetsNotMeet/comments/32poia/creepy_walmart_guy/): > I mean, it’s very noble of you and all to be so concerned about the possibility of a criminal assault against an innocent man who is “just” following a female shopper around a Walmart because he might be unfairly accused of being “creepy” on purely “subjective” grounds. But my guess is that most of the people who are upvoting this particular meme are thinking of instances like the ones I’m quoting, in which case you can kind of see why they’d feel sympathetic to the notion of clocking such a dude with a can of beans. That’s all very nice. But it’s like comparing the man who shots two armed black assailants breaking into his house, as opposed to the man who killed a innocent black youth who was “acting suspicious”. NOTHING at all, \*nothing whatsoever \*in the meme indicated anything other thna “being creepy”. So you can bring in these horror stories- but they have nothing whatsoever to do with the advice given to assault a guy for merely being creepy. And I will tell you ladies- that your “creepy radar” is pretty damn worthless. I had to read thru a bunch of fBI cases studies about pedophiles (horrible, nauseating stuff), and in every single case the Mom was quoted as saying that the kiddie rapist “seemed like such a nice man” , never, ever “well, I thought he was creepy from the moment I saw him”. Pedophiles dont _act_ or\* look\* creepy, they\* are \*creepy. Too many girls have been dated raped by a “cute guy” who slipped them a date rape drug. So, _creepy radar_ or \*momma bear radar \*is pretty much useless. ---
**Author:** ![Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f475e1/32.png) [@Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jimmy_Chitwood)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2019, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-men-at-walmart/836160/40 "2019-06-27T18:26:26Z")
Oh, well, if you’ve read FBI case studies about pedophiles, what does anyone’s expertise about violence against women, science about fear, or the experience of _actually being a woman_ have to contribute? You should have said so! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-men-at-walmart/836160.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/creepy-men-at-walmart/836160.md?page=3)