Thanks, everyone, for the great answers. Ignorance fought.
And nope, no DWIs. No criminal record, no guns in the car, not even a Blackhawks sticker.
Don’t forget, no nunchuks or ninja throwing stars either.
(Seriously - those are restricted weapons here. I once got the whole security gate in one wing of the Calgary airport locked down while they waited for the RCMP many, many years ago (early 90’s). Their xray of my baggage showed a ninja throwing star, classified as a dangerous weapon. As security guards, they were not authorized to do anything but call the police, cannot dig in bag or handle anything once alarm I raised. Cops arrive a few minutes later, I show them it’s a small lead crystal starburst (sun-catcher - hang in your window) and all is back to normal… I suppose nowadays a pointy glass thing might not be allowed. )
You shouldn’t have any issues with a valid passport and ID and a clean record. The shortcut around Lake Ontario you’re talking about is well known, lots of Americans use it.
I’m a Canadian, and I often cut through into the states at Sarnia while crossing east to west because gas at the time was cheaper and it was shorter to drive through Michigan and cross again in North Dakota or somewhere rather than endure Northern Ontario and most of the prairies again. If you don’t have a criminal record and you’ve sanitized your car (and probably your phone because you’re obligated to give border CBS officers your passwords so they can access your phones, computers, devices and USB drives in your possession They’re only going to look AFTER you’ve been black-flagged for something else, it’s not a routine thing, but they are entitled to demand your passwords and look through your texts etc. for evidence that you’re inadmissable to enter Canada.)
If you’re just driving through though, you just give the border guard a handful of receipts all date and time stamped and you’re on your way. They see it all the time.
As far as crossing times go, pretty much every crossing has either a listed wait time on the federal government website. As no one has cited it, here it is:
What did someone drive on? 
Did the border guard give a receipt to show a Canadian traffic cop if stopped, or did the Canadian police expect that an American wouldn’t have his/her license? (Licence? :))
Sometimes they ask you a few questions like where you are going, how long you will be in Canada. Other times they have you pull over, search your possessions and ask more questions. I was in a group of 10 people in a van in 2011 and it took a long time. Apparently there was an extra suitcase from a previous group that had been left behind, no one had claimed it when they had us show our suitcases so they were extra careful.
But you need a passport book or card or some states have an enhanced drivers license. The passport book is good for flights but not the card or enhanced DL-those are good only for driving or boat. Probably wise to make sure your passport is more than six months from expiring.
If you’re crossing into Canada from New York State in Cornwall and 10 hours and 800km later crossing back into the states in Windsor, how do you get your license back? And what do you use for ID in Canada without a DL or a passport?
Going back to my memory from as far as the 1960’s, I don’t remember any border people asking to keep a driver’s license. Perhaps you misunderstood - until sometime around 9/11 showing a driver’s license (Computer printed form, no picture) was sufficient ID to get into the USA or Canada. Now a passport is pretty much mandatory. (I remember the RCMP returning a friend’s license after his roommate with a record had used it to traverse the states going back to Toronto.)
No passport stamping. Usually it takes only a minute or two once I get to the window. However, depending on the time of year or time of day, it can take a while to get to the window. I usually expect to spend between 10 & 30 minutes at the border. One very bad weekend was several hours.
How would they find a DWI by scanning your passport?
mutual legal assistance agreements between Canada and the US to link criminal records to passports, to help catch cross-border criminality.
Mrs DrumBum and I went on holiday a few years to Niagara Falls. While we did not have problems entering at the Canadian border, the Mounty lingered a bit
longer on my passport, a consequence, I suppose to the many and varied stamps I have accumulated. :eek:
There is a slight possibility that you will get pulled in for a random check. It is a little unnerving - even when you know you do not have contraband stuffed in your seat cushions. And it will cause a bit of a delay.
Again, unlikely to happen, but good to be aware of.
ETA: Be prepared to answer questions such as where are you going, how long will you be in Canada, and what are you bringing with you across the border.
mmm
My brother and I were at the Houlton, ME to Woodstock, NB crossing some years ago. We were pulled inside and separated to tell our stories. They were trying to catch us up, or something, but we were just crossing to visit relatives, with no evil intentions. After about ninety minutes of questioning, we were allowed entry. I was given no explanation, but one of the ones interrogating my brother told him that they didn’t believe we were brothers. Although we shared a last name and lived in the same city, we had different addresses. We were in our late twenties or early thirties at the time and apparently they couldn’t get their arms around the fact that we didn’t live with our folks anymore.