# Crunchy Frog's Welcome Wagon (newbies take note) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 6, 2000, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crunchy-frogs-welcome-wagon-newbies-take-note/39958 "2000-11-06T16:48:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2000, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crunchy-frogs-welcome-wagon-newbies-take-note/39958/101 "2000-12-03T19:49:54Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Lsura \* > \*\*27 currently living in Atlanta. Since graduating with a Bachelor’s degree in history in 1995, I have lived in Waterville, Maine, Chattanooga, TN, Murfreesboro, TN, Nashville, TN, Jackson, MS, and now Atlanta. I just did my first ever renewal of a lease, so I plan to be here until at least May 2002. > > Single, no kids, no pets(I’m dying for a dog though…but it’s a small apartment). And I’m a corporate pigdog, er, auditor, for a living. \*\* **Lsura** , you may be in the running for my new favorite Doper! I love history and have read many biographies and books. (My favorites: biographies of Peter the Great and Teddy Roosevelt, Patriots by AJ Languuth (I think that’s his name) and Band of Brothers by Stephen Ambrose (again, I think that’s the name of the author) Ok, enough of being nice. It’s go time. I see you move around a lot. What are you wanted for? Murder? Embezzlement? Statutory rape? If you need to pack it up and go on the lam again in May 2002, may I suggest Nebraska? After visiting their tourism website, I can guarantee that even if someone did find out you were hiding out there, no one would actually want to go there to get you. And it’s good to see you’re puttin gthat history degree to good use as a corporate pigdog! What do you do as an auditor anyway? Is it like accounting? I used to have an accountant. Then I bought a calculator. Bite me, newbie. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2000, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crunchy-frogs-welcome-wagon-newbies-take-note/39958/102 "2000-12-03T19:54:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by mdf \* > \*\*Hey, we did that on purpose. Keeps out the undesirables. > \ > -mdf, Life member, Keep Nebraska for Nebraskans Committee \*\* We feel pretty much the same way in St Louis. It’s okay to come visit, but don’t stick around. Take the Arch for instance, the ‘Gateway to the West’: We built a monument to people who are just passing through. ---
**Author:** ![MaoMao](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/dc4da7/32.png) [@MaoMao](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MaoMao)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2000, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crunchy-frogs-welcome-wagon-newbies-take-note/39958/103 "2000-12-03T20:15:09Z")
I’m brand spanking new to these boards and I can’t wait to get my welcome insults. I’m a 21 year old female, living and going to school in Los Angeles. I’m graduating in May with a degree in Fiction Writing. (in other words i am majoring in Unemployment) I have zero desire in writing the Great American novel. I want to write smut, and I want to make lots of money doing it. In the meantime I work in a clothing store, as the lead cashier. (it just means I know how to count) I like reading, seeing movies and I love football. (even though LA doesn’t have a team) Ok Crunchy frog, tear me apart. ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2000, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crunchy-frogs-welcome-wagon-newbies-take-note/39958/104 "2000-12-03T20:45:37Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by MaoMao \* > \*\*I’m a 21 year old female, living and going to school in Los Angeles. I’m graduating in May with a degree in Fiction Writing. (in other words i am majoring in Unemployment) \*\* As I’ve said before, I’m also a wannabe writer. However, I’m too busy selling-out to actually write anything lately. > [@](#): > > **I have zero desire in writing the Great American novel. I want to write smut, and I want to make lots of money doing it.** Well, tell you what, as one wannabe writer to another, feel free to email me your, uh, work and I’ll offer constructive critisisms. Ok? I have extensive knowledge in the subject of writing smut, as I have read a lot of Penthouse Forum. > [@](#): > > **I like reading, seeing movies and I love football. (even though LA doesn’t have a team)** Have I mentioned I’m in St Louis? It must suck that we have your team now, huh? Even won the SuperBowl last year! I hope you don’t bear me any ill will, since I am not personal responsible for the Rams being here, and just let me take this opportunity to say 😛 _nyahh nyahh nyahh_ 😛 > [@](#): > > \*\*Ok Crunchy frog, tear me apart. \*\* You like it rough huh? But **MaoMao** we hardly know each other! Are all you LA woman this forward? BTW, if you read the entire thread, you must have seen where I told **JustAGirl** that all female newbies must send me their nekkid pix. I will be expecting to see them presently. BMN. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2000, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crunchy-frogs-welcome-wagon-newbies-take-note/39958/105 "2000-12-03T20:56:54Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Dr\_Paprika \* > **I am a 28 and currently working as an intern in Spittleville, Canada.** Where is Spittleville? ---
**Author:** ![Nymysys](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/f6c823/32.png) [@Nymysys](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nymysys)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2000, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crunchy-frogs-welcome-wagon-newbies-take-note/39958/106 "2000-12-03T21:07:34Z")
Damn, I knew I forgot to send those nekkid pics to someone. I guess every other male person on the boards has them by now. It would just be overkill to send 'em to Froggy. Oh well. ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2000, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crunchy-frogs-welcome-wagon-newbies-take-note/39958/107 "2000-12-03T21:18:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Nymysys \* > \*\*Damn, I knew I forgot to send those nekkid pics to someone. I guess every other male person on the boards has them by now. It would just be overkill to send 'em to Froggy. Oh well. \*\* And as I sit here, fuming with jealousy over the fact that everybody but me saw you nekkid, I’ll comfort myself with . . . oh I don’t know, what can comfort me in this time of intense heartache? Oh, I’ve got it! I’ll comfort myself with the knowledge that IRL, I’m not single. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![MaoMao](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/dc4da7/32.png) [@MaoMao](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MaoMao)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2000, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crunchy-frogs-welcome-wagon-newbies-take-note/39958/108 "2000-12-03T21:24:48Z")
Crunchy Frog, If you want to see aany Nakidity, you will just have to pay the $39.95 a month like every other porn Aficionado. As to your Rams, I take your foolish taunting and I spit on it. Any person can be proud of a team that wins the super bowl, but think of the dedication that I go to at least one Charger game a year, if not more. I mean to pay money to see a team with one win, that’s true football grit. Oh and compared to most LA girls, I’m tame. ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2000, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crunchy-frogs-welcome-wagon-newbies-take-note/39958/109 "2000-12-03T21:38:41Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by MaoMao \* > **As to your Rams, I take your foolish taunting and I spit on it. Any person can be proud of a team that wins the super bowl, but think of the dedication that I go to at least one Charger game a year, if not more. I mean to pay money to see a team with one win, that’s true football grit.** Are we forgetting the Rams prior to 1999? And then the Cardinals before that? I know football pain, lass. ---
**Author:** ![eulalia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eulalia/32/457_2.png) [@eulalia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eulalia)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2000, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crunchy-frogs-welcome-wagon-newbies-take-note/39958/110 "2000-12-03T22:13:25Z")
Hi, I’m a female 45-year-old electronic technician. You do not want to see nekkidpix of me, unless someone can find some from 25 years ago. I read a lot, right now I am in the middle of a fairly sympathetic biography of Catherine de Medici, but mostly I read science fiction and fantasy, with the occasional mystery. If you writers need someone to look at your stuff and give you opinions, I’ll be glad to do that for you. I realy appreciate good writing! ---
**Author:** ![DRY](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a87d85/32.png) [@DRY](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DRY)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 6:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crunchy-frogs-welcome-wagon-newbies-take-note/39958/111 "2000-12-04T06:45:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Crunchy Frog \* > \*\*42. Alabama Red. Hut hut HIKE! > \*\* :rolleyes: You know, a REAL football fan would know that in college and professional football, they don’t really yell “Hike.” > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by MaoMao \* > \*\*As to your Rams, I take your foolish taunting and I spit on it. \*\* As well you should! \*\* > [@](#): > > Oh and compared to most LA girls, I’m tame. > \*\* Rrarrr. 🙂 [sub]Sorry, Crunchy, but us LA people gotta stick together.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Pyrrhonist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/919ad9/32.png) [@Pyrrhonist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pyrrhonist)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crunchy-frogs-welcome-wagon-newbies-take-note/39958/112 "2000-12-04T14:51:02Z")
I exist and sustain myself just south of the City of Clowns and Liars (A.K.A Washington, DC). A technology company pays me for my presence 40 hours per week, but often forgets to fill those hours. I own a house filled with many cats and a few thousand books. I have a wife. Children are forbidden to set foot on my property. I am a cynic and skeptic extraordinaire. I am a iconoclast. I detest movies based on books. I think Professional Sport Teams and Pop Musicians should be exiled to Iraq. I haven’t turned on the TV is six years. I prefer the Ram’s Bladder Cup. ---
**Author:** ![Nymysys](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/f6c823/32.png) [@Nymysys](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nymysys)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crunchy-frogs-welcome-wagon-newbies-take-note/39958/113 "2000-12-04T16:17:41Z")
\ I have really fond memories of this thread. I’m glad it got a breath of fresh air so that I could peruse it once again. ---
**Author:** ![MissBHaven](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/missbhaven/32/7170_2.png) [@MissBHaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MissBHaven)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2000, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crunchy-frogs-welcome-wagon-newbies-take-note/39958/114 "2000-12-05T15:23:19Z")
I’m from St. Louis too… What a town! So, where’d you go to high school? 🙂 Quick bio: I’m 31, dark brown hair, blue eyes, almost 5’3" and xxxlbs. I love books, movies and any activity with friends! ---
**Author:** ![broccoli](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a183cd/32.png) [@broccoli](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/broccoli)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2000, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crunchy-frogs-welcome-wagon-newbies-take-note/39958/115 "2000-12-05T16:08:36Z")
wow, I never noticed this post before… Alrighty then. I’m 23 German/Irish born-in-America-mutt. light brown hair - spiked pretty harsh. Blue eyes, septum pierced. I work a day job supporting computer networks, and I have just restarted my band (_sans_ drummer). We play mainly punk. I am a non-licensed E.M.T., and a massage therapist. I love pets, have a Ball Python and some fish. I used to train dogs before I moved to Tampa this summer. I studied History, Religion, Philosophy, and various arts while I was a Education Major (before I realised I was better at hands-on schooling). I have worked too many jobs. I want to be famous. I love people who can _think_. film at eleven, broccoli! ---
**Author:** ![Tygr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/df788c/32.png) [@Tygr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tygr)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2000, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crunchy-frogs-welcome-wagon-newbies-take-note/39958/116 "2000-12-05T18:43:12Z")
Well, lookit this… The thread came back the very next day. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Crunchy Frog \* > \*\*Ok, Tygr, sparky, buddy. … You’re married to who? Is **jkayla** a user name or did you drop the mouse on your keyboard? \*\* LOL No, that’s the user name my sweet wife chose when she registered to the SDMB. (Why? Beats me, I just live with her.) She hasn’t posted much here since she registered. She spends a lot of her at-home surfing time on the BuffyTVS message board. “Honest, officer, she looked like a grown-up when I married her.” 😉 ---
**Author:** ![eulalia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eulalia/32/457_2.png) [@eulalia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eulalia)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2000, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crunchy-frogs-welcome-wagon-newbies-take-note/39958/117 "2000-12-05T19:26:05Z")
I am so disappointed that monsieur frog has not responded yet. I do want so much to bite someone, it’ been a long time since someone has actually invited me to. ---
**Author:** ![Bumbazine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bumbazine/32/362_2.png) [@Bumbazine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bumbazine)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2000, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crunchy-frogs-welcome-wagon-newbies-take-note/39958/118 "2000-12-05T21:01:44Z")
Okay **Brittle Amphibian,** you’re on. I’m a 53 yr. old Senior Programmer/Analyst for a large printing company in Portland, Oregon. (I’ve already heard all the jokes about **anal** yst) I’ve been married twice, divorced once. I can’t say anything bad about my first wife though. Not since that injunction thing. I am a large, anti-social, heterosexual male who was once described in an interview as “arrogant, and not a team player.” Is that enough to go on? Before you invite me to bite you, just let me put on a pot of Fava beans and open a nice bottle of Chianti. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Pinky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/848f3c/32.png) [@Dr.Pinky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Pinky)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2000, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crunchy-frogs-welcome-wagon-newbies-take-note/39958/119 "2000-12-05T21:36:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Pyrrhonist \* > \*\* > I haven’t turned on the TV is six years. \*\* I see it hasn’t improved your literacy. And I haven’t turned on the TV in _nine_ years, so neener, neener. So bite me, newbie. Excuse me - I think I just channeled a frog. ---
**Author:** ![stargazer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eb8c5e/32.png) [@stargazer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stargazer)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2000, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crunchy-frogs-welcome-wagon-newbies-take-note/39958/120 "2000-12-06T00:20:48Z")
I’m 22, living in Seattle (it _is_ wet all the time here… well, almost). Just graduated from Seattle Pacific University, where I double-majored in Theatre and English Literature. Now I’m working for a little Internet start-up company, regardless of my fuzzy majors. I’m getting married in October (thank GOD… this waiting-till-marriage thing is killing us!). Crunchy, may I kiss you under the [mistletoe](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=49098&pagenumber=4) instead of biting you? I’ll even nibble on your ear… 😉 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crunchy-frogs-welcome-wagon-newbies-take-note/39958.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/crunchy-frogs-welcome-wagon-newbies-take-note/39958.md?page=7)