# Culinary help needed from UK dopers

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/culinary-help-needed-from-uk-dopers/272332>\
**Category:** Cafe Society\
**Created:** [November 1, 2004, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/culinary-help-needed-from-uk-dopers/272332 "2004-11-01T15:17:56Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![Waccoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Waccoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waccoe)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2004, 2:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/culinary-help-needed-from-uk-dopers/272332/21 "2004-11-02T14:37:05Z")

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> [@owlstretchingtime](#):
>
> Like most food that has been rendered crap in the 70s (black forest gateau; goulash; duck a l’orange; navarin of lamb etc) it’s pretty good if done well.

I expect you’re right. I have only ever eaten prawn cocktails at my wife’s family get togethers (weddings, anniversaries etc) in the West Midlands, where the only alternative starter has been melon. It hasn’t been great.

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**Author:** ![Motorgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e36b37/32.png) [@Motorgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Motorgirl)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2004, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/culinary-help-needed-from-uk-dopers/272332/22 "2004-11-02T15:10:10Z")

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Man o man.  
I’m probably not ever allowed to visit England again.

All the things I like are just not right.

Prawn cocktail (called shrimp cocktail 'round these parts) - we make it at home a lot in the summer.

I dug the prawn sandwiches at Pret.

Cucumber on my salmon sandwiches. Cuke on lots of kinds of sandwiches!

AND I go to Red Sox games, even though I’m not a particular baseball fan, because I like going to the ball park & drinking bad beer & eating hot dogs.

Just take my passport away from me now.

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**Author:** ![ChristmasEve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/97f17d/32.png) [@ChristmasEve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChristmasEve)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2004, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/culinary-help-needed-from-uk-dopers/272332/23 "2004-11-02T18:46:22Z")

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Returning to the OP’s salmon sandwiches, there is a further subtle distinction as to whether to use tinned red or pink salmon. The latter, being cheaper, was looked down upon by my grandmother, with the result that the former was normally served in sandwiches for Sunday tea, drowned in malt vinegar and topped with plenty of pepper. Standing downwind of one of those could clear your sinuses.

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**Author:** ![MinniePurl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cab0a1/32.png) [@MinniePurl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MinniePurl)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2004, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/culinary-help-needed-from-uk-dopers/272332/24 "2004-11-02T20:13:06Z")

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> [@Motorgirl](#):
>
> From the [English to American Dictionary](http://english2american.com/dictionary/p.html#ponce) :
> 
> **ponce** _n._ **1.** A man who is pretentious in an effeminite manner. Ponces (quite often referred to using the phrase perfume ponce) tend to grown their hair quite long and talk loudly into their mobile phone while sitting at the traffic lights in their convertible Porsche.

When I hear the word “ponce”, the first person I think of is [Laurence Llewellyn-Bowen](http://www.llb.co.uk/).

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**Author:** ![Motorgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e36b37/32.png) [@Motorgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Motorgirl)\
**Post date:** [November 2, 2004, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/culinary-help-needed-from-uk-dopers/272332/25 "2004-11-02T20:43:14Z")

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> [@MinniePurl](#):
>
> When I hear the word “ponce”, the first person I think of is [Laurence Llewellyn-Bowen](http://www.llb.co.uk/).

wow.

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**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\
**Post date:** [November 3, 2004, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/culinary-help-needed-from-uk-dopers/272332/26 "2004-11-03T00:10:23Z")

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Don’t forget salmon [spread](http://www.thebritishshoppe.com/Merchant2/merchant.mvc?Product_Code=SHISA&Screen=PROD&Store_Code=TBSRJTC) for another standard of British salmon cuisine.

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**Author:** ![Zoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a4c791/32.png) [@Zoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoe)\
**Post date:** [November 3, 2004, 10:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/culinary-help-needed-from-uk-dopers/272332/27 "2004-11-03T10:34:59Z")

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**MinniePurl** , I have so much fun watching Laurence Llewellyn-Bowen. I like his particular “ponce.” His decorating decisions can be rather strange sometimes.

Are y’all saying that you don’t have to fry the salmon when you take it out of the tin? We always took the boney pieces out, mixed it with crackers (saltines), shaped it into patties and fried them in a cast iron skillet. Not terribly _ponce_, I’m afraid.

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**Author:** ![Starving\_Artist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@Starving\_Artist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Starving_Artist)\
**Post date:** [November 3, 2004, 10:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/culinary-help-needed-from-uk-dopers/272332/28 "2004-11-03T10:37:43Z")

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Salmon croquettes? Mmm…

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**Author:** ![Zoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a4c791/32.png) [@Zoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoe)\
**Post date:** [November 3, 2004, 10:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/culinary-help-needed-from-uk-dopers/272332/29 "2004-11-03T10:39:50Z")

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BTW, **Minnie** , I live a few blocks from where your namesake lived prior to her death. I ran into her a couple of times. She was actually a very pleasant, intelligent and gracious woman. She lived next door to the governor. How did you end up with her name? [/ my part of this hijack]

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**Author:** ![MinniePurl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cab0a1/32.png) [@MinniePurl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MinniePurl)\
**Post date:** [November 4, 2004, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/culinary-help-needed-from-uk-dopers/272332/30 "2004-11-04T21:43:58Z")

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> [@Zoe](#):
>
> MinniePurl, I have so much fun watching Laurence Llewellyn-Bowen. I like his particular “ponce.” His decorating decisions can be rather strange sometimes.

I have nothing against him, he is just the definition of “ponce” to me. I used to watch him, but we went to basic cable to save money, so I don’t get BBCAmerica anymore (and to tell the truth, I was getting horrendously bored with all the antiques and gardening shows.) But, as you say, I don’t think I’d want him decorating my house

> [@Zoe](#):
>
> BTW, Minnie, I live a few blocks from where your namesake lived prior to her death. I ran into her a couple of times. She was actually a very pleasant, intelligent and gracious woman. She lived next door to the governor. How did you end up with her name? [/ my part of this hijack]

Someone suggested it to me as a play on my constant knitting (hence it being Purl and not Pearl). I do remember watching Hee-Haw when I was very small, I think she was on there. I was amused when I was watching Farscape and Crichton referred to the Scarran Hat Lady as “Minnie Pearl”.

As far as strange British foods… what is up with beans on toast? That is just plain odd to this American.

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**Author:** ![Made\_in\_Macau](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eada6e/32.png) [@Made\_in\_Macau](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Made_in_Macau)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2004, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/culinary-help-needed-from-uk-dopers/272332/31 "2004-11-05T01:07:39Z")

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This is a history question. It refers to practises now long since gone.  
No - you don’t cook the salmon once out of the tin - you mash it with a fork, including the spine, then as has been said, drown it in vinegar. (Cucumber was a seasonal poncey optional extra) You then put this between white bread slices and eat. It demonstrates that you are effectively leaving the working class and moving into the upper working class. Lower middle class would have been eating brown bread and spreads and fillings from shops unknown.  
Now, if you’re working class you can afford to not eat this stuff if you want, and if you are on benefits and skint, you’ll be eating McDonalds anyway.  
I recently gave my 74 year old dad some fresh salmon and he said it was nice, but he preferred it from a tin.

Minnie - I like beans and toast but not beans on toast - makes it too soggy for me.  
But cheese, marmite and lavabread on toast - well…

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**Author:** ![owlstretchingtime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/958977/32.png) [@owlstretchingtime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/owlstretchingtime)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2004, 11:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/culinary-help-needed-from-uk-dopers/272332/32 "2004-11-05T11:33:53Z")

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Every single student and single man in Britain would starve to death if beans on toast were outlawed.

(I like mixing curry paste in them - the gastric consequences of this can be spectacular.)

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**Author:** ![Angua](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8baadc/32.png) [@Angua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Angua)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2004, 11:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/culinary-help-needed-from-uk-dopers/272332/33 "2004-11-05T11:59:07Z")

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> [@owlstretchingtime](#):
>
> Every single student and single man in Britain would starve to death if beans on toast were outlawed.
> 
> (I like mixing curry paste in them - the gastric consequences of this can be spectacular.)

:eek:

Putting chilli in them works rather nicely actually, but curry paste? :eek:

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**Author:** ![Tabby\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tabby\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tabby_Cat)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2004, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/culinary-help-needed-from-uk-dopers/272332/34 "2004-11-05T13:09:48Z")

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> [@owlstretchingtime](#):
>
> Every single student and single man in Britain would starve to death if beans on toast were outlawed.
> 
> (I like mixing curry paste in them - the gastric consequences of this can be spectacular.)

Hmm. I never actually thought of that. Beans on toast, with curry paste. Hmm. Does it work with curry powder? Do you need to cook it in, or what?

😃

Ah, and by the way, each time I see “cuke”, I think “caulk”, and do a double take.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![owlstretchingtime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/958977/32.png) [@owlstretchingtime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/owlstretchingtime)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2004, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/culinary-help-needed-from-uk-dopers/272332/35 "2004-11-05T13:37:26Z")

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> [@Tabby\_Cat](#):
>
> Hmm. I never actually thought of that. Beans on toast, with curry paste. Hmm. Does it work with curry powder? Do you need to cook it in, or what?
> 
> 😃
> 
> .

It does work with curry powder - but not as well. The tomato suace gives it a rogon Josh type feel.

You do need to open the windows afterwards though.

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**Author:** ![Motorgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e36b37/32.png) [@Motorgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Motorgirl)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2004, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/culinary-help-needed-from-uk-dopers/272332/36 "2004-11-05T15:43:41Z")

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> [@Tabby\_Cat](#):
>
> Ah, and by the way, each time I see “cuke”, I think “caulk”, and do a double take.

Caulk makes a much dryer sandwich. It’s best to moisten it up a bit with some mayo.

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**Author:** ![ralph124c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8797f3/32.png) [@ralph124c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ralph124c)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2004, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/culinary-help-needed-from-uk-dopers/272332/37 "2004-11-05T16:18:34Z")

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Do you need frsh toad? Or is canned acceptable?  
Really, tghis name absolutely cracks me up-what in God’s name is it?

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**Author:** ![Small\_Clanger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9fc348/32.png) [@Small\_Clanger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Small_Clanger)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2004, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/culinary-help-needed-from-uk-dopers/272332/38 "2004-11-05T17:01:46Z")

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> [@ralph124c](#):
>
> Really, this name absolutely cracks me up-what in God’s name is it?

Well if you’re all out of toad, you can cook bangers in batter, sort of a giant Yorkshire Pudding with embedded sausages.

Here’s [Delia’s version](http://www.deliaonline.com/recipes/r_0000001030.asp)

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**Author:** ![teela\_brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d9b06d/32.png) [@teela\_brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teela_brown)\
**Post date:** [November 5, 2004, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/culinary-help-needed-from-uk-dopers/272332/39 "2004-11-05T17:47:57Z")

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This thread reminds me - what in the world is Salmon Crumble?

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**Author:** ![owlstretchingtime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/958977/32.png) [@owlstretchingtime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/owlstretchingtime)\
**Post date:** [November 6, 2004, 10:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/culinary-help-needed-from-uk-dopers/272332/40 "2004-11-06T10:55:22Z")

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> [@pugluvr](#):
>
> This thread reminds me - what in the world is Salmon Crumble?

From the sound of it: - inedible

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