# Curse you, damn DMV! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 24, 2012, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/curse-you-damn-dmv/616712 "2012-03-24T20:41:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![septimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/septimus/32/410_2.png) [@septimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/septimus)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2012, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/curse-you-damn-dmv/616712/21 "2012-03-25T19:24:40Z")
Nevada’s DMV needed proof of my social security number, which I didn’t have. So I obtained a blank 1040 form, filled it out randomly (but with correct social security number), photocopied it, and scuffed up the copy a little to age it. Presto! Nevada Driver’s License! It didn’t last long however. Despite being a Nevada resident I needed a California Driver’s License (nevermind why), presented my Nevada license as ID at Calif. DMV and, without any warning, the California DMV person immediately punched a hole in the Nevada license to invalidate it! :mad: ---
**Author:** ![drachillix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/48db29/32.png) [@drachillix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drachillix)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2012, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/curse-you-damn-dmv/616712/22 "2012-03-26T14:35:19Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > I would like to see a national driver’s license or ID card, though. We have ID [U.S. Passports](http://travel.state.gov/passport/) ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2012, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/curse-you-damn-dmv/616712/23 "2012-03-26T15:11:31Z")
In Pennsylvania, the DMV (at least the one I went to recently) does not accept cash. Seriously. ---
**Author:** ![Chessic\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7c8e57/32.png) [@Chessic\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chessic_Sense)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2012, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/curse-you-damn-dmv/616712/24 "2012-03-26T15:49:28Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > I’m sorry but it appears your rant is missing 2 points of complaints, so we are unable to assist you at this time. You will need to obtain at least 2 more points of your complaint and try again later. Also, just a reminder, to register your rant you will need 2 and 1/2 forms of picture ID that show that you are **smiling bandit**. > > Thank you for allowing us to service you and have a nice day > 🙂 Holy shit, **kanicbird** , that’s funny. ---
**Author:** ![Saint\_Cad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saint_cad/32/18907_2.png) [@Saint\_Cad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saint_Cad)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2012, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/curse-you-damn-dmv/616712/25 "2012-03-26T16:16:05Z")
2.5 years to get my car title from DMV-California. ---
**Author:** ![Pleonast](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pleonast/32/1183_2.png) [@Pleonast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pleonast)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2012, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/curse-you-damn-dmv/616712/26 "2012-03-26T21:35:33Z")
When I moved to Massachusetts from Ohio, in order to get my car’s registration and plates, I needed to transfer its title. Because you can’t get plates (or insurance, which is a part of the same process) on an out-of-state vehicle there. No problem, I thought, I have the title. So the clerk started the process of creating the MA title. But there was a problem. In MA, the title lists the color of the car. In OH, it doesn’t. The clerk said they couldn’t give me a MA title because of insufficient information. So much for full faith and credit. After about 10 minutes of discussion, with the clerk and the supervisor, they decided they could “make an exception” and we went outside so they could see the color of the car and complete their form. People get so trapped by the usual they forget how to handle the unusual. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2012, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/curse-you-damn-dmv/616712/27 "2012-03-26T21:55:41Z")
> [@Pleonast](#): > > In MA, the title lists the color of the car. if you paint your car a different color, are you expected to amend the title? ---
**Author:** ![flatlined](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eb9ed0/32.png) [@flatlined](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flatlined)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/curse-you-damn-dmv/616712/28 "2012-03-27T03:53:50Z")
I bought a motorcycle and wanted custom Veteran’s plates, so I went to the DMV with the bike and paperwork. Waited for an hour then gave the lady my paperwork and she told me how much I needed to pay. After 6 weeks, I called the DMV and couldn’t talk to a person, so left a message. The next day, I got a call from a very irate sounding lady who told me that I didn’t get my plates because I didn’t pay enough. Excuse me? I paid what the DMV person told me to pay. My plates were supposed to be delivered within a month and they had my home address and phone number. If there was a problem with the payment, they knew how to contact me. This was in no way my fault, but that bitch sure seemed to think I was trying to cheat the DMV out of $12. ---
**Author:** ![Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/46a35a/32.png) [@Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tim_T-Bonham.net)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/curse-you-damn-dmv/616712/29 "2012-03-27T04:04:38Z")
> [@Pitchmeister](#): > > Here in socialist Germany, we have central registration of every citizen… And how’d that work out for many of your citizens in the spring of 1933? ---
**Author:** ![Locrian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/locrian/32/14146_2.png) [@Locrian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Locrian)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 8:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/curse-you-damn-dmv/616712/30 "2012-03-27T08:03:45Z")
I remember the story of the DMV located on Nantucket Island outside Massachusetts - Average renewal time: 4 minutes. Yep, another reason why islands might be better. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 10:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/curse-you-damn-dmv/616712/31 "2012-03-27T10:45:25Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > Actually, in the US, the individual states offer state ID cards, which are just as valid as ID cards as driver’s licenses are. They just don’t certify the owner as being able to legally operate a motor vehicle. The same agency issues them. They’re for people who can’t or won’t drive, and don’t want a driver’s license. And if you’re a foreigner from the wrong country, they give you as much shit to obtain one as if you were trying to get an actual license. ---
**Author:** ![Jragon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 10:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/curse-you-damn-dmv/616712/32 "2012-03-27T10:53:20Z")
> [@jtgain](#): > > Because if you are 24, you give your expired ID to your 19 year old brother who looks a lot like you so he can buy beer, get into clubs, whore around, and promote death and destruction on the surrounding community. > > I agree with the OP, though. Some of the documents that are requested (like utility bills) are so easily forged to be laughable. And some of the documents that “prove” residency (like a vehicle title) can be obtained without proving residency. So if I was playing a trick, I could title my vehicle in the state (residency not required), and then use that title as “proof” of my residency. > > More security theater. A while ago community college, in an effort to [del]milk out of state tuition[/del] be absolutely sure my friend was a resident of my state requires an up to date ID. She presented an ID that expired a few months previous, no dice. So we went to the DMV and GOT an ID. This still, somehow didn’t prove residency, apparently it has to be at least 6 months old (but also not expired). They decided they wouldn’t accept her university transcripts or the university bills showing in-state tuition (from a university within the state, obviously) from 4 months previous, nor her university ID as proof. We gave them high school records, birth certificates, whatever from the state “you could have left in the intervening years and come back.” Which is fair I guess. Well… except for the thing that proved it. Guess what magical, smoking bullet evidence PROVED she was a current resident of the great state of Arizona? She took a ceramics class there when she was 9 years old. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 11:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/curse-you-damn-dmv/616712/33 "2012-03-27T11:00:33Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > if you paint your car a different color, are you expected to amend the title? Old Spanish titles did not list the color. Mine doesn’t, so when I checked I was told “you may paint it polka dots if you want to, no paperwork to update.” Newer ones do, so if you change its color you have to update the title. ---
**Author:** ![Pitchmeister](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pitchmeister/32/3459_2.png) [@Pitchmeister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pitchmeister)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 12:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/curse-you-damn-dmv/616712/34 "2012-03-27T12:09:27Z")
> [@t-bonham@scc.net](#): > > And how’d that work out for many of your citizens in the spring of 1933? Not quite sure how to respond to that… Not enough :dubious::rolleyes:😕 in the world. I suppose when the government comes for you (because they know where you live, too), you will just fight them off with your guns. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Kenm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bc79bd/32.png) [@Kenm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kenm)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/curse-you-damn-dmv/616712/35 "2012-03-27T16:07:44Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > You also have to remember that in the US, some of our individual states are as large or larger than some of your Yurpean countries. And a couple of our states are not even connected with the main part of the US. Centralization might not be the best way for us to go about it. So what? What am I missing? ---
**Author:** ![HookerChemical](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/278dde/32.png) [@HookerChemical](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HookerChemical)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/curse-you-damn-dmv/616712/36 "2012-03-27T17:04:18Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > Nevada DMV absolutly _rocks!_ I can’t say enough good about them. I have more vehicles registered than I own pairs of shoes (I am serious) and there is never a problem. I can do nearly everything online, and get renewals back in 2 business days usually. > > In the old days, I once wrote _one_ check for 3 different registration renewals on a monday. I got 2 back on Wed, and the 3rd on Thursday. > > It took me 3 months to get a duplicate title from Tennessee once! I used to live in Nevada and agree wholeheartedly. About a decade or so ago, they put in a very serious effort to speed things up, and it worked. Here in California, it’s a mixed bag. The DMVs in the cities tend to be backed up and slow, but the ones in rural areas tend to be quick. It can be quicker to drive 45 minutes to get to a rural area and get in line there than to go to the nearest DMV. Once you’re done sitting in the office, online renewal has generally been smooth. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/curse-you-damn-dmv/616712/37 "2012-03-27T17:21:37Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > This. I don’t know how many times I took an expired ID from someone when I was working at a convenience store…and I didn’t even work there that long. I usually got a lot of static, until I said “Well, Officer Smith usually stops by here around this time. Tell you what, let’s let HIM look at this ID, and if you still contend that I stole it from you, then I’ll go along peaceably.” Amazingly enough, NOBODY wanted to stick around for Officer Smith to show up and arrest me, or even to chastise me severely. Every single one of these people had some appointment they urgently needed to keep (at 10 PM). > > Yes, occasionally IDs expire. But in my experience, someone who offers up an expired ID is much more likely to be using someone else’s old ID, whether the original owner knows about it or not. Wait, wait. Come back. Are you saying that you were _confiscating_ people’s IDs? While working as a clerk at a store? I thought only law enforcement officers had the power to do that. 😕 ---
**Author:** ![koeeoaddi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/koeeoaddi/32/408_2.png) [@koeeoaddi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/koeeoaddi)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/curse-you-damn-dmv/616712/38 "2012-03-27T17:40:35Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > Nevada DMV absolutly _rocks!_ I can’t say enough good about them. I have more vehicles registered than I own pairs of shoes (I am serious) and there is never a problem. I can do nearly everything online, and get renewals back in 2 business days usually. > > In the old days, I once wrote _one_ check for 3 different registration renewals on a monday. I got 2 back on Wed, and the 3rd on Thursday. > > It took me 3 months to get a duplicate title from Tennessee once! At the DMV in Cody, Wyoming there won’t be anybody in the room except you and a nice woman named Francine, who sits behind a card table, takes your picture, hands you your brand new license and tells you you couldn’t possibly be 44 years old. Okay it was a few years ago, but let me bask in the afterglow, okay? ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/curse-you-damn-dmv/616712/39 "2012-03-27T17:57:37Z")
I sympathize with the OP. But really? Pitting the DMV? Why not pit the IRS and old age as well? Did you go there expecting prompt, helpful service? Anyway, they do suck. ---
**Author:** ![Find\_Friends](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@Find\_Friends](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Find_Friends)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2012, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/curse-you-damn-dmv/616712/40 "2012-03-27T18:14:04Z")
I first found a baffling problem with banks way back in the 80’s. You couldn’t use a drivers license for ID **if it was expired!** And I’m talking about a few months! I wasn’t expecting to continue to drive with it. In fact, I’ve always been careful not to drive a car without a current valid driver’s license. It’s just for ID!!! Not for operating a motor vehicle!!! Just because **it** expired, doesn’t mean \*\*I \*\*expired! Good gravy! Just as you said, one could easily find someone to forge such a document. And it would no doubt be forged with a current date. If anything, the fact that it was old and expired would be a sign of my innocent intent. So I certainly understand one part of your many-faceted frustration, smiling bandit. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/curse-you-damn-dmv/616712.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/curse-you-damn-dmv/616712.md?page=3)