# Custom Profiles By UncleBeer! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 3, 2000, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-profiles-by-unclebeer/16400 "2000-04-03T18:19:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![WallyM7](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b5e925/32.png) [@WallyM7](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WallyM7)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2000, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-profiles-by-unclebeer/16400/1 "2000-04-03T19:07:00Z")
Unclebeer wrote a profile for ChiefScott that was hilarious. Even the Chief likes it. Copycat that I am, I made one for Demo. Dud. Anyway, I bet if you ask nicely, Unc will make a custom profile for you as well. Just drop in here and post your request. Here’s a sample of UncleBeer’s work: > [@](#): > > Homepage: [http://www.bigfuckinboatwithbadassplanes.mil](http://www.bigfuckinboatwithbadassplanes.mil) > Occupation: Swabbie Pounder, First Class > Location: Anywhere you feckless landlubbers ain’t. > Interests: Navy Chow, Port of Call, The Head, Air Superiority > ICQ Number: CVN69 This is a time limited offer, so act now. ---
**Author:** ![phouka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c5a1d2/32.png) [@phouka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phouka)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2000, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-profiles-by-unclebeer/16400/2 "2000-04-03T18:19:00Z")
[hopping up and down, waving hand] Oh! Oh, me! Please do me! I’ll be your bestest friend!!! [/hopping up and down, waving hand] ---
**Author:** ![Globe-trotter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cab0a1/32.png) [@Globe-trotter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Globe-trotter)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2000, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-profiles-by-unclebeer/16400/3 "2000-04-03T19:01:00Z")
Me too! Me too! ::sad puppy look:: * * * Oh yeah? Well, Ginger Rogers did everything that Fred Astaire did. Backwards. In high heels. - As per Wally ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2000, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-profiles-by-unclebeer/16400/4 "2000-04-03T20:00:00Z")
Me three! Me three! (Since I didn’t get a Wally sig…) * * * Winner, SDMB’s Biggest FEMALE Chat Addict (Happy, Jophiel?) “Only two things that’ll soothe my soul - cold beer and remote control.” ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2000, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-profiles-by-unclebeer/16400/5 "2000-04-03T20:05:00Z")
Well, I guess I know what I’ll be doing tonight. I can’t say it isn’t deserved though. Now where’d that damned, “Close Thread” button go? ---
**Author:** ![Demo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/demo/32/8472_2.png) [@Demo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Demo)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2000, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-profiles-by-unclebeer/16400/6 "2000-04-03T20:06:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Copycat that I am, I made one for Demo. Dud. Umm, are you calling me or the profile a dud Wally? Do I want to know? Personally I liked it. 😉 * * * Just make yourself comfy while I shoot nuclear particles into your heart. (Courtesy of Wally) ---
**Author:** ![psycat90](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@psycat90](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psycat90)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2000, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-profiles-by-unclebeer/16400/7 "2000-04-03T20:07:00Z")
Not before I sign up!! * * * Any similarity between your reality and mine is purely coincidental. ---
**Author:** ![SanibelMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e4f/32.png) [@SanibelMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SanibelMan)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2000, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-profiles-by-unclebeer/16400/8 "2000-04-03T20:12:00Z")
Well, since Wally didn’t give me a sig line, I suppose you won’t be giving me a profile either… _sigh_ * * * ## _SanibelMan_ - [My Homepage](http://members.macconnect.com/~jonkleinow/) I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn’t looking good either. ---
**Author:** ![Omniscient](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omniscient/32/3290_2.png) [@Omniscient](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omniscient)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2000, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-profiles-by-unclebeer/16400/9 "2000-04-03T20:20:00Z")
I’d gladly submit myself as a guinea pig, but I’d think for a truely accuate profile, it’s gotta be done by a chat ho. But, UncBier has partaken of sweet libations with me on a pair of scintilating occasions. ---
**Author:** ![Diane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2acd7d/32.png) [@Diane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diane)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2000, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-profiles-by-unclebeer/16400/10 "2000-04-03T20:27:00Z")
Ohhhh UncleBeeeeeeeeer . . . . 😉 * * * Pardon me while I burst into flames. ---
**Author:** ![Flypsyde](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f0a364/32.png) [@Flypsyde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flypsyde)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2000, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-profiles-by-unclebeer/16400/11 "2000-04-03T20:27:00Z")
UncBier: $0.85 (for the worldliness) partaken: $0.50 (standard rate) libations: $0.65 (better than quaff or liquid refreshment) scintillating: $0.50 (again, standard rate) Impressing the MB with selections from the thesaurus you got for Christmas: priceless _The preceding ad was brought to by Omni and the Visa/Mastercard company._ * * * Battles are won in nuance. ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2000, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-profiles-by-unclebeer/16400/12 "2000-04-03T20:30:00Z")
Oh yeah. I have _got_ to get me one of these! * * * This is my new sig. Thank Wally. It was his idea. “I made my husband join a bridge club. He jumps next Tuesday.” ---
**Author:** ![Omniscient](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omniscient/32/3290_2.png) [@Omniscient](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omniscient)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2000, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-profiles-by-unclebeer/16400/13 "2000-04-03T20:31:00Z")
Flyper, quite nice, I’m impressed. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Jeannie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e480ec/32.png) [@Jeannie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jeannie)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2000, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-profiles-by-unclebeer/16400/14 "2000-04-03T21:22:00Z")
Hey, UncleBeer! Do one for me. I know that we don’t know each other very well, so if you need any info about me in order to come up with something, email me. So, now I’ll have a Wally sig and an UncleBeer profile. Geez, 25 years old and I can’t do a damn thing for myself. Sad, isn’t it? * * * I never hate myself in the morning. I sleep till noon. –Sig line courtesy of Wally 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Lucretia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/13edae/32.png) [@Lucretia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucretia)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2000, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-profiles-by-unclebeer/16400/15 "2000-04-03T22:56:00Z")
Well, I have a Wally sig. I need the UncleBeer profile to complete the set. Purty purty please? * * * Drink up, dear. I made it just for you. _sig by_ **WallyM7** ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2000, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-profiles-by-unclebeer/16400/16 "2000-04-03T23:04:00Z")
Phouka Homepage: [www.phoukatoyoutwo.com](http://www.phoukatoyoutwo.com) Occupation: Philanthropist Location: Phoenix Interests: Phone Phouking, Phocomelia, Phoenicia. MoosieGirl Homepage: [www.loosiegoosiemoosie.gov](http://www.loosiegoosiemoosie.gov) Occupation: Taxidermist and hunt guide Location: Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan, Canada Interests: The Loyal Order of the Moose, Moosehead (and the beer). Falcon Homepage: [www.tiercel.com](http://www.tiercel.com) Occupation: Culling slow moving vermin Location: The wild blue yonder. Interests: Thermals, updrafts, downdrafts, air currents in general. psycat90 Homepage: [www.urigeller.com](http://www.urigeller.com) Occupation: Flack for The Psychic Friend’s Network Location: Concentrate and it’ll come to you. You’re not concentrating, damnit. Try harder. Interests: Telekinesis, Psychokinesis, Thoughtography. SanibelMan Homepage: [www.I’mjustagigolo.edu](http://www.I'mjustagigolo.edu) Occupation: Teen-age gigolo Location: Sanibel Island, Florida, USA, Earth, Sol System, Milky Way Galaxy, Universe 1, you know, the one with 3 dimensions… Interests: Paper, Plastics and Canvas Bags Omniscient Homepage: [www.youdon’tknowshit.edu](http://www.youdon'tknowshit.edu) Occupation: All-knowing, All-seeing, Future God Location: Purgatory Interests: Shiny Objects, Beer, Pointy Objects, Beer, Round Objects, Beer, Flat Objects, Beer, Heavy Objects, Beer… Diane Homepage: [www.where’smybeer.org](http://www.where'smybeer.org) Occupation: Pining for UncleBeer Location: My heart is with UncleBeer (and I wish my body was, too) Interests: I’ll give you one guess Cristi Homepage: [www.mutilatedpeep.com](http://www.mutilatedpeep.com) Occupation: Slayer of Peeps, Heir Apparent to St. George Location: Peeples, Colorado. Interests: Mutilating, Mangling, Maiming and Generally Butchering Marshmallow Peeps. * * * ## More to come… I’m _still_ on Wally’s shitlist. ---
**Author:** ![purrplebear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/90ced4/32.png) [@purrplebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purrplebear)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2000, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-profiles-by-unclebeer/16400/17 "2000-04-03T23:05:00Z")
UncleBeer, I just wanted to say that you’re a very good sport to do this for everyone. You don’t have to do one for me, unless you’re really bored tonight, and want to. Seriously. No, really, you don’t have to. 😉 * * * You sing in my consciousness like a counterpoint to my life. L.L. That’s my name, not a description. I am neither purple nor a bear. Okay, so I’m purple.\ ---
**Author:** ![CanadianSue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/71e660/32.png) [@CanadianSue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanadianSue)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2000, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-profiles-by-unclebeer/16400/18 "2000-04-03T23:06:00Z")
Jumping up and down behind all the tall people… me too please * * * Give your children these two things: One is roots, the other, wings - Wally Wally He’s our Man ---
**Author:** ![hightechburrito](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/f6c823/32.png) [@hightechburrito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hightechburrito)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2000, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-profiles-by-unclebeer/16400/19 "2000-04-03T23:07:00Z")
What about me? ---
**Author:** ![Shadowfox](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c89c15/32.png) [@Shadowfox](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shadowfox)\ **Post date:** [April 3, 2000, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-profiles-by-unclebeer/16400/20 "2000-04-03T23:26:00Z")
## Oh come on UncleBeer, you have to do one of me. After all, I drove you to the store for the pink wine run and talked your ear off. Shadowfox “The dead have risen, and they’re voting Republican!” - Bart Simpson [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-profiles-by-unclebeer/16400.md?page=2)