# Custom Written Songs By Sealemon! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 2, 2000, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-written-songs-by-sealemon/21224 "2000-06-02T16:56:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![WallyM7](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b5e925/32.png) [@WallyM7](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WallyM7)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2000, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-written-songs-by-sealemon/21224/21 "2000-06-03T12:49:49Z")
Do me! Do me! ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2000, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-written-songs-by-sealemon/21224/22 "2000-06-03T13:51:41Z")
Osip: Thanks, man! I agree about the Death Metal song: I was laughing as i wrote it. I’m not sure if I’ll be able to top that one. Sqrlcub: Pagans, guitars and a bright velcro fastner. Movies and piercings and a naked Ed Asner. A big grinning Santa wearing a G string, These are a few of my favorite things… ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2000, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-written-songs-by-sealemon/21224/23 "2000-06-03T14:14:47Z")
May I please have a song too, Sealemon, my old Guy Stuff pal? Please include lyrics about wombats, roses, coffee, clock radios, chocolate mousse, Shetland ponies, and redheads. Thanks a bunch! ---
**Author:** ![saucy\_potato](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/edb3f5/32.png) [@saucy\_potato](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saucy_potato)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2000, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-written-songs-by-sealemon/21224/24 "2000-06-03T16:42:57Z")
I like the sea and I like lemons. Can I have a song too? ---
**Author:** ![Narile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/71c47a/32.png) [@Narile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Narile)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2000, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-written-songs-by-sealemon/21224/25 "2000-06-03T17:47:07Z")
Wally, Please this is a public forum, if you want that sort of thing take it where the kids can’t see it. That said, Sealemon88, this is most amusing. Got anything for the tone deaf dragon sitting at this computer? ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2000, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-written-songs-by-sealemon/21224/26 "2000-06-03T18:54:58Z")
Seale, old buddy, old pal…wanna write a song for me? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2000, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-written-songs-by-sealemon/21224/27 "2000-06-03T19:34:19Z")
From Purplebear: > [@](#): > > Ooooo Seale, my buddy…I’d love a custom song from you! How about one about love? Or sex? Or both! Or about whatever you think I might like, I’m not picky! (Pretty much any James Brown song) Uh! Love! Uh, uh! Yeeeeo! Gotta get some lovin’! Gotta get some lovin’! I’m hot as an oven, gotta get that lovin’! You’re an angel…set from above Gotta get you to me, and show ya love! Uh! Good God! I’ma gonna show ya…I’ma gonna show ya…I’ma gonna show ya…Hit me! I’m an honest man I’m not corrupt-a Gonna grab your body and I’m gonna erupt-a! Like a volcano A big volcano I’ma gonna erupt-a! I’ma gonna erupt-a! Uh! I’ma gonna erupt-a! One more time… I’ma gonna erupt-a! Yeeeeeeooow! Gotta get that lovin’! Gotta get that lovin’! I’m hot as an oven! Gotta get that lovin! Jump back! Hmmm. This one seemed much more entertaining in my head than it does in print. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![purrplebear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/90ced4/32.png) [@purrplebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purrplebear)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2000, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-written-songs-by-sealemon/21224/28 "2000-06-03T19:49:02Z")
🙂 🙂 'Saright, Seale, my man. I’ll take it, and _Thanks_!! Now if only Mr Bear were still here…I’d have him sing that to me… 😉 Well, maybe not. 😛 He could however… :o ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2000, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-written-songs-by-sealemon/21224/29 "2000-06-03T20:02:49Z")
Narile the tone deaf dragon Watches his PC He tries to hum in A sharp But he’s really in the key of C! Narile the tone deaf dragon Is always out of tune So when he tries to sing along, You’d best give him some room! MaryAnnQ (For Gilligan’s Isle) Just sit right back, and you’ll hear a tale a tale that’s sure to scare About this clueless loser who had some funky hair He really wanted to get it trimmed so it was MaryAnn he called. But what she didn’t tell him was that he would have been better bald. The trimming started getting rough With hair all over the floor and after his 'do killed her razor she kicked him to the door. So give thanks you’re not this guy who had such frightful hair 'cause Mary wouldn’t cut it again… for money or a dare! ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2000, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-written-songs-by-sealemon/21224/30 "2000-06-03T20:33:36Z")
> [@](#): > > How’s about a song for me set to the tune of “Shaft”? He cleaned the Philippines Always nice, and never mean… Talkin’ about [Taft.](http://library.thinkquest.org/12587/contents/personalities/wtaft/wht.html) **Taft!** He’s one Chief Justicing mother fu- **Shut your mouth!** I’m talkin’ 'bout Taft. **Taft!** He’s always popular with those Progressive cats. He always followed the law and that’s why he’s walkin’ tall. That’s right…I’m talkin’ about **Taft!** Oooohh. Wait. You wanted it to be _about_ you? My bad. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2000, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-written-songs-by-sealemon/21224/31 "2000-06-03T20:52:12Z")
Democritus: (Duh duh duh, duh duh, duh duh duh, duh duh) Chat whore! (Duh duh, duh duh duh) Don’t need to talk no more! (Duh duh, duh duh duh) You need to put your keyboard…dooooown Chat whore! (duh duh, duh duh duh Bumm bumm bum buummm…) Chat whore, you always yakkin’. (Duh duh duh duh) And you’re always in the Dope Room! (duh duh duh duh) Everytime I log in, there you are! (duh duh duh duh) And while you’re at it, stop posting druuuuunk… Chat whore! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Talkinsquirrel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f6c823/32.png) [@Talkinsquirrel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Talkinsquirrel)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2000, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-written-songs-by-sealemon/21224/32 "2000-06-03T21:18:02Z")
Is it too late to get in this song deal?? sonnnnnnnnnnnng!!! ---
**Author:** ![nashiitashii](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7c8e57/32.png) [@nashiitashii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nashiitashii)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2000, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-written-songs-by-sealemon/21224/33 "2000-06-03T23:37:46Z")
Okay, now, let’s see… can mine be about my little non sequitir happeneings, my obessions with monty python, douglas adams, and, um… [shit, lost that thought. gotta go chase after it now.] also, if this will help, i’m an aquarius, and i seem t attract followers who annoy me. I am NOT the messiah. Also, remember kids, 3 is the magic number. thanks, and toodles! ```auto ``` ---
**Author:** ![timmar68](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/97f17d/32.png) [@timmar68](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/timmar68)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2000, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-written-songs-by-sealemon/21224/34 "2000-06-04T01:38:03Z")
That was great! Thank you! No one ever wrote a song for me before. I feel so special. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Ayesha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c0e974/32.png) [@Ayesha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ayesha)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2000, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-written-songs-by-sealemon/21224/35 "2000-06-04T14:54:41Z")
My turn Sealemon, and make it good, or I’ll have to spank you at the next HouDope meeting. 😉 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2000, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-written-songs-by-sealemon/21224/36 "2000-06-04T16:45:46Z")
Awww, shucks, MaryAnn. ‘twern’t nuthin’. P.S. The song for Demo is set to Wild Thing, for you yungins out there. Vestal Blue (To Reunited) Going flying, and I’m soaring high Going flying, in the deep blue sky There’s one little thing, that would make this flight suck If my plane stalls out then I am–really _hosed_, yeah yeah. Check my gauges, don’t want nothing wrong 'cause if I crash this would be a sad song But if I go down, I’ll be as smart as a fox I’ll suck my gut real tight and hide in the–black box, yeah yeah… > [@](#): > > May I please have a song too, Sealemon, my old Guy Stuff pal? > > Please include lyrics about wombats, roses, coffee, clock radios, chocolate mousse, Shetland ponies, and redheads. > > Thanks a bunch! (To Horse With no Name–No, that’s not the real title, but I don’t know what it is. I just know it’s that Neil Young song, m’kay?) I went through the desert on a horse with no name But it’s a Shetland pony, just the same. In the desert, coffee tastes pretty rank like a wombat pissed in it until it stank La laaa, la la la la. La la la, laaa la. La laaaa la, la la la la. La la la, laaaa la. My clock radio’s got sand in it now it doesn’t work whatever time it is is lost in the murk my chocolate mousse has melted and my roses are dead it’s hotter then the temper of a fiery redhead La laaa, la la la la. La la la, laaa la. La laaaa la, la la la la. La la la, laaaa la (Repeat the "la"s for about 20 minutes, or until someone beans you in the head). ---
**Author:** ![Narile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/71c47a/32.png) [@Narile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Narile)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2000, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-written-songs-by-sealemon/21224/37 "2000-06-04T18:26:27Z")
Sealemon88, Let me guess the sealing wax is for everyones ears, right? 🙂 Thanks for the laugh. ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2000, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-written-songs-by-sealemon/21224/38 "2000-06-04T22:58:46Z")
Thanks, Seale! Nice job! (but just between you & me, _Horse With No Name_ is by America, not Neil Young. But don’t feel bad–I used to think it was by Neil Young, too.) ---
**Author:** ![SqrlCub](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ea5d25/32.png) [@SqrlCub](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SqrlCub)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2000, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-written-songs-by-sealemon/21224/39 "2000-06-05T13:41:36Z")
WOOHOO! That was the best Sealemon. HUGS! Sqrl ---
**Author:** ![Sunshine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Sunshine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunshine)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2000, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-written-songs-by-sealemon/21224/40 "2000-06-05T14:47:44Z")
Thanks, Seale! My song is awesome…I’m going to be singing it all day! :::humming and filing::: _If a problem comes along, you must sort it! Sort it good…_ 🙂 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-written-songs-by-sealemon/21224.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/custom-written-songs-by-sealemon/21224.md?page=3)