# DalovinDJ: You're not the arbiter of hip or cool... **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 26, 2001, 12:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dalovindj-youre-not-the-arbiter-of-hip-or-cool/83894 "2001-09-26T12:14:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![lno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@lno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lno)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2001, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dalovindj-youre-not-the-arbiter-of-hip-or-cool/83894/21 "2001-09-26T15:54:00Z")
I had a friend in high school who occasionally would exhibit flashes of brilliance; it’s one of the reasons I managed to tolerate all of his faults. When he decided to grow his hair long, wear a black trench coat, et cetera, he responded to questions with, “Oh, I’m a nonconformist, but I make sure to conform to the existing standards of nonconformity.” ---
**Author:** ![dalovindj](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/65b543/32.png) [@dalovindj](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dalovindj)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2001, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dalovindj-youre-not-the-arbiter-of-hip-or-cool/83894/22 "2001-09-26T15:56:13Z")
I may not be the arbiter of cool, but I am an ambassador. Seriously, check out [How to Speak Hip](http://www.kdb.net/hip.htm), and I think my conversations about “being hip” will reveal their humorous intentions more clearly. It’‘s all just good-hearted diggin’ on the art of living life. No offense intended to anyone, regardless of their tastes. DaLovin’ Dj ---
**Author:** ![Diane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2acd7d/32.png) [@Diane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diane)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2001, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dalovindj-youre-not-the-arbiter-of-hip-or-cool/83894/23 "2001-09-26T16:00:04Z")
> [@](#): > > I think he is serious about his concerns of ‘hipness’. I thought the same thing when he first showed up on the SDMB, but if you look around at some of his other threads he quite often turns off the “hep cat” persona and communicates in english. 😉 Looking at the full picture, it certainly doesn’t appear as if he takes himself seriously in his “hipness” and that part of the amusement is watching those who don’t see the joke. > [@](#): > > I don’t think its taking him to seriously. I think its more of a case of getting annoyed and letting him know it. Ya know I love ya Fenris and I certainly respect that we may have differences of opinion in what we find entertaining, but I have to confess, I like dj. I realize that he has posted some things that were improper and have pissed me off, but all in all I think he brings an added entertaining dimension to the board. I do think there are a handfull of people who are taking him way to serious, but that is must my opinion. Besides, how boring if we all wrote the same things in the same tone ---
**Author:** ![racinchikki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@racinchikki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racinchikki)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2001, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dalovindj-youre-not-the-arbiter-of-hip-or-cool/83894/24 "2001-09-26T16:03:39Z")
[Indie](http://www.dieselsweeties.com/strips/sw179.shtml) [Rock](http://www.dieselsweeties.com/strips/sw180.shtml) [Pete](http://www.dieselsweeties.com/strips/sw12.shtml). “I can’t do that. That would not be indie.” “You can’t do that. That would not be hip.” What difference is there? :shrug: Indie Rock Pete goes hip-hop with a Sugar Bear accent. ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2001, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dalovindj-youre-not-the-arbiter-of-hip-or-cool/83894/25 "2001-09-26T16:13:13Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by gobear \* > \*\* To be cool, be yourself. Start your own fashion and follow that different drummer. Cool, like change, must come from within. \*\* Oh, I swear to god, **gobear** , it’s comments like this that only endear you to me more. Onnna these days, I’m gonna turn the corner, move down to D.C. and become your Personal Body Guard. Tempting…tempting. 🙂 Now then. **Fenris** , I’ll apologize in advance for the hijack about to occur but your rant here leads so PERFECTLY into a related rant. I owe ya one. This guy, this Visigoth, this carbunkle on the privates of the SDMB, he’s no more the arbiter of cool and taste here than, why…than Dr. Laura ! :eek: I agree with the posters who feel he’s so damned insecure that he NEEDS all of us to either sign up with his Program of Cool ( or, Pogrom of Cool, take yer pick ), or go the fuck away. How very exclusionary. Now for the hijack. What this person is doing smacks of a larger problem. It goes to the very heart of why I- and why many of us- adore the SDMB to the extent that we do. If you want to go to a Message Board filled with people who listen to NOTHING but the Prog Rock group **YES** , I bet they exist. You can go and talk about just one topic and wallow in the narrowness of the chat, and enjoy that topic. ( I chose them because they are in fact my fave group, and it was a safe shot to take). This is the SDMB, not some other exclusive Board or Newsgroup or Chat room. When I went to the Upper West Side DopeFest evening, I was walking into a room filled with people I didn’t know, except that I DID KNOW some of them really well- by their words. Their thoughts, experiences and dreams had been shared with me ( and the rest of the Teeming Millions ). The very fact that we are all accepting enough to gather and enjoy each other’s company, part company and take away good or bad responses- WITH SOME RESPECT for those we met- seems to me to be the hallmark of the SDMB Community. **dalovindj** wishes for a social response and cliqueishness that hasn’t existed here before he landed on Planet Cecil, and sure as shit won’t exist now that he’s here. Here’s my complaint. It goes beyond SDMB. If I go to a party,or hang out with the other parents, and conversation on ANY topic arises, frequently the sum total of the conversation is a very subtle one-upsmanship. Yeah yeah, I am sure I do it too, I’m not fucking Saint Peter here- but now and then I am aware of being in a conversation where I REALLY DO NOT like any of the points of view being offered, or where I have nothing similar to the topic at hand to relate. I love that! Who the heck wants to only hang out with people who share their particular vision of the world. I’ve always seen the Straight Dope as a salon- a place where minds meet and share, but do not arrive or leave with a common point of view. The only sure bet is that ideas are exchanged with respect and humor. People like **dalovindj** are really trying to undermine that by being the arbiter of what is cool, or hip, or worthy of conversing over. I find that not only useless, but injurious to the spirit of this Board. Cartooniverse ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2001, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dalovindj-youre-not-the-arbiter-of-hip-or-cool/83894/26 "2001-09-26T16:21:42Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Diane \* > \*\*Ya know I love ya Fenris and I certainly respect that we may have differences of opinion in what we find entertaining, but I have to confess, I like dj. I realize that he has posted some things that were improper and have pissed me off, but all in all I think he brings an added entertaining dimension to the board. I do think there are a handfull of people who are taking him way to serious, but that is must my opinion. > > Besides, how boring if we all wrote the same things in the same tone \*\* I obviously blew it with my OP since what I meant to say is not getting across to so many Dopers I respect. **Diane** : I agree that the “cool-cat” tone of his posts is unique, yet clear enough to be understood. ( **Nostradamus** , another relative newbie has a similarly unique “voice” who brings a lot to the boards). Both obviously know the language well enough to play with it and I admire their skill. The only thing I’m trying to bring up with this post is how much the “I’m cool and you’re not” gimmick annoys me. Really, really annoys me. I think it brings an unwanted (by me, at least) Junior High tone to the Board (“Are YOU one of the cool people? One of the “in” crowd?”). I just previewed and **Cartooniverse** articulated _why_ I find this so annoying far more articulately than I could :: applauds **'toon** :: Like I said, that’s why I didn’t post this in the other **DJ** threads, since there’s all sorts of other stuff going on that I didn’t want to get mixed up with my post. I wanted to focus specifically on this one point only. Anyway, thanks for the feedback **Diane**! Fenris PS: **'toon** : I agree about the greatness that is **Gobear** , but from what I know about how much he works out, he might end up being _your_ bodyguard! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![dalovindj](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/65b543/32.png) [@dalovindj](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dalovindj)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2001, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dalovindj-youre-not-the-arbiter-of-hip-or-cool/83894/27 "2001-09-26T16:21:55Z")
**cartooniverse** : Nah, I just want more data points on what others find to be the coolest experiences available to humanity. Not neccecarily to make them feel the same way I do. Like the Midori thread: Wrong Answer: “Who are you to tell me what to drink!” Great Answer: “Pansy. You should drink whiskey, not absolut.” Instead of dissing the subject, input your thoughts. Then I can compare notes and refine my views (if need be)accordingly. Dig? And there are many other points of discussion on this board I participate in. GD, Cafe Society, a little MPSIMS. The “Hip/Cool” posts are just me having fun. DaLovin’ Dj ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2001, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dalovindj-youre-not-the-arbiter-of-hip-or-cool/83894/28 "2001-09-26T16:49:53Z")
You see, dalovindj, most of us here don’t think in terms of “what’s cool.” We think in terms of “what I like.” For example, I don’t drink Midori for the same reason I don’t drink peach schnapps. If I’m going to drink, I prefer to drink beer, or maybe wine. It would never occur to me that my drink choice would be at all influenced by what the people around me (including the bartender) might think. Most of us, even those of us who are far below the legal drinking age, have outgrown the desire to impress others with our beverage choices. We drink what we like, and even if our drinks are not cool, we are cool. ---
**Author:** ![Diane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2acd7d/32.png) [@Diane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diane)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2001, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dalovindj-youre-not-the-arbiter-of-hip-or-cool/83894/29 "2001-09-26T17:08:48Z")
Fenris - I was a little slow catching on. I need a nap. Anyway, I understand what you are saying now. I initially thought you were flaming his hip-speak - which I love. ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2001, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dalovindj-youre-not-the-arbiter-of-hip-or-cool/83894/30 "2001-09-26T17:10:37Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Fenris \* > \*\* PS: **'toon** : I agree about the greatness that is **Gobear** , but from what I know about how much he works out, he might end up being _your_ bodyguard! 😃 \*\* \<------singing," To dreeeeeeam the impossible dreeeeeeeeeeeeeeam… ". I hear ya, **Fenris**. I met up with **gobear** and **geobabe** about a month ago for coffee and such. We all broke bread. Or more accurately, **gobear** broke his bread. I barely had the upper body strength to butter mine. 😃 ( And, I used too much butter- how gauche ! ) \*Originally posted by \ ***dalovindj** > [@](#): > > Instead of dissing the subject, input your thoughts. Then I can compare notes and refine my views (if need be)accordingly. Dig? Yeah yeah, I dig. Holy shit on toast. So, I am now supposed to input my thoughts for the refinement of YOUR views?? \*\*DON’T YOU GET IT AT ALL??? YOU’RE NOT THE FUCKING GOD OF COOL HERE !!! \*\*. And, you won’t be until **jarbabyj** resigns. 🆒. Even then, you have a line of oh, say, 14,999 ahead of you. Just do your thing, and let us do ours, and stop trying to imprint your version of what is cool on us. **Dig?** Oh, and yes I do in fact own the printed copy of the screenplay to “Pulp Fiction”. I also own lots of other things. Doesn’t make me cool, though. It doesn’t make you cool, either. Cartooniverse ---
**Author:** ![Krispy\_Original](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ec9cab/32.png) [@Krispy\_Original](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Krispy_Original)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2001, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dalovindj-youre-not-the-arbiter-of-hip-or-cool/83894/31 "2001-09-26T17:30:15Z")
**dalovindj** is cool…and anyone posting pit threads about him is not cool. JMO …and BTW, I never thought you were funny Fenris. So there. ---
**Author:** ![gobear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8dc957/32.png) [@gobear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gobear)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2001, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dalovindj-youre-not-the-arbiter-of-hip-or-cool/83894/32 "2001-09-26T17:38:23Z")
[blushes modestly] Thanks for the kind words, y’all. **Cartooniverse** , you can guard my body anytime! 😃 **DalovinDJ** , I get it that you’re just signifyin’ and having fun, but your constant comments on the Tao of Hipness are older than Madonna’s stretchmarks. _Trying_ to be hip, to define coolness, misses the point entirely. Coolness is like enlightenment in Zen; the harder you try to catch it, the further it slips away from you. The best I can approximate it in speech–because Cool, like Zen, cannot be transmitted in words–is to be yourself without seeking the approval of others. Frank Zappa said it best, “You are what you is.” Drink Guinness because it’s tasty, not so people can see you drinking it. Listen to Jay-Z because you’re down wit’ da flava, not so you can tell people you like him. In addition, knowing pop culture does not define cool, and it certainly has nothing to do with one’s worth as a person. Honor, generosity, and compassion are a lot more worthwhile characteristics than memorizing Jules’s speech in _Pulp Fiction_ (FWIW, one of my alltime favorite movies). My BF has never seen a Kurosawa movie and hates science fiction. Does that make him uncool to me? Ha! He likes what he likes, and I like what I like because our bond is deeper than if he’s seen _Rashomon_ or digs _Babylon 5_. Moreover, one of the benefits of being with him is exposing him to my interests and vice versa, so we can both have the experience of seeing something through the other’s eyes. I can never again see _Repo Man_ for the first time, but I can see him watch it for the first time and get the vicarious first time thrill. ---
**Author:** ![wring](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@wring](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wring)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2001, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dalovindj-youre-not-the-arbiter-of-hip-or-cool/83894/33 "2001-09-26T17:53:48Z")
I ‘get’ it. Just not all that impressed by it. Shrug.m Reminds me of Jim Carrey in “Mask” (or was it “The Mask” ?) wasn’t impressed then, either. And **Fenris** - I got your OP. ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2001, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dalovindj-youre-not-the-arbiter-of-hip-or-cool/83894/34 "2001-09-26T17:56:15Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Krispy Original \* > \*\*…and BTW, I never thought you were funny Fenris. So there. \*\* Oh. Um. I’m terribly sorry that you haven’t enjoyed my posts. In the future, I’ll better try to phrase my posts so as to amuse you, personally. Please submit a 300 word essay detailing your humor needs and I’ll give it all due consideration. Ummm…who are you again? So there. Fenris ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2001, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dalovindj-youre-not-the-arbiter-of-hip-or-cool/83894/35 "2001-09-26T18:01:18Z")
Funny is one thing, but if there’s one thing I can’t stand here, it’s a GIMMICK poster. I have to deal with them at SAAN. It’s an appropriate place for them. This place isn’t. ---
**Author:** ![Krispy\_Original](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ec9cab/32.png) [@Krispy\_Original](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Krispy_Original)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2001, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dalovindj-youre-not-the-arbiter-of-hip-or-cool/83894/36 "2001-09-26T18:19:40Z")
> [@](#): > > Oh. Um. I’m terribly sorry that you haven’t enjoyed my posts. In the future, I’ll better try to phrase my posts so as to amuse you, personally. Oh. Um. I’m terribly sorry that you haven’t enjoyed **dalovindj** posts. In the future, maybe he can try to phrase his posts so as to suit you, personally. > [@](#): > > Ummm…who are you again? Are you serious? ---
**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2001, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dalovindj-youre-not-the-arbiter-of-hip-or-cool/83894/37 "2001-09-26T18:43:59Z")
**Krispy** ’s cool. Not hip, mind you, but cool. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2001, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dalovindj-youre-not-the-arbiter-of-hip-or-cool/83894/38 "2001-09-26T18:49:32Z")
[Playground voice]Hey everybody! **Fenris** and **Krispy** are fighting! Fight! Fight![/Playground voice] ---
**Author:** ![dalovindj](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/65b543/32.png) [@dalovindj](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dalovindj)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2001, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dalovindj-youre-not-the-arbiter-of-hip-or-cool/83894/39 "2001-09-26T18:58:54Z")
**gobear:** > [@](#): > > Trying to be hip, to define coolness, misses the point entirely. Coolness is like enlightenment in Zen; the harder you try to catch it, the further it slips away from you. The best I can approximate it in speech–because Cool, like Zen, cannot be transmitted in words–is to be yourself without seeking the approval of others. I really like this statement. It is so true. I wish you guys would all listen to the “How to Speak Hip” (linked above) comedy. It’s great because it pits the “Hipster” against the “Straight-man”. The host is unhip for even asking what hip is. But, he is really trying to show the hipster to be a fool for subscribing to all this nonsense. He is made to be the fool by the end, but the hipster also get’s plenty of chances to look silly. The main point really ends up being that to try to be something you’re not is foolish. Another point, however, is that there can be an art to everyday mundane things. It will vary from person to person, as art must, but life CAN be lived with art and style in mind. And this is not a bad thing. The more you discuss the various opinions on any issue, the more knowledge you have to pull from when you make the decision of what is right for you. Discussion of the varying opinions on the art of doing various things is what I’m looking for. I like what \*\* Miller\*\* said in this thread: > [@](#): > > Drinking doesn’t make you hip, but if you do drink, you have to know the right way to do it, as outlined by dalovindj. . . Actually, while I agree with the general sentiment, I’ve got some doctrinal conflicts with the dj. Give me the doctrinal conflicts, not a put-down for bringing the subject up. That gets nowhere. And while my experiences may not have been towards the classical, I’m sure **Guinastasia** that you have not had much experience with the graffiti artists of brooklyn, the deep beats of “The Beat Junkies”, or the Incredible dancing of KRS-One’s breaking troupe. But those are all art forms. I never said I knew everything about all art. Art is wide and diverse. I just recognise that art is important and wish to discuss (not lecture) it in it’s varying forms. DaLovin’ Dj ---
**Author:** ![seawitch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a587f6/32.png) [@seawitch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/seawitch)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2001, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dalovindj-youre-not-the-arbiter-of-hip-or-cool/83894/40 "2001-09-26T19:38:14Z")
Perhaps if we put this in **DJ** ’s area of expertise it will translate better. **DJ** - you’ve said you’re an actor and a DJ, right? The “cool/not cool” thing is like playing the same record all night long. Or like playing Willie Loman in _Death of a Salesman_ every night, year after year, for the rest of your life. Success in either profession demands the ability to judge the tastes and tolerances of the crowd you’re playing for. And this crowd isn’t buying tickets for the same show anymore. Perhaps a change is in order? PS - I’ve never met either **Fenris** or **Cartooniverse** , nor seen photos. However, I remain convinced that cool or not, they’re both hot. Flamin’ **hot**. [sub]Except for the slight grudge I’ve been nursing over the soul appraisal thread.[/sub] [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dalovindj-youre-not-the-arbiter-of-hip-or-cool/83894.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dalovindj-youre-not-the-arbiter-of-hip-or-cool/83894.md?page=3)