# Dammit.  I just can't do it!

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dammit-i-just-cant-do-it/136186>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [November 10, 2002, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dammit-i-just-cant-do-it/136186 "2002-11-10T22:31:12Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 4\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\
**Post date:** [November 11, 2002, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dammit-i-just-cant-do-it/136186/21 "2002-11-11T22:23:29Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Scylla \*  
> **The problem is that I’m 200 pounds.**

Is there a rule against running with a bunch of helium balloons attached to your shoulders?

If there is, you could work on just taking a big inhalation of helium right before the start, and then holding your breath the whole race.

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**Author:** ![scout1222](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/34f0e0/32.png) [@scout1222](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scout1222)\
**Post date:** [November 11, 2002, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dammit-i-just-cant-do-it/136186/22 "2002-11-11T23:28:16Z")

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Ha! Holding your breath for the whole race! Not a problem, I’m sure.

😉

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**Author:** ![dinahmoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/8797f3/32.png) [@dinahmoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dinahmoe)\
**Post date:** [November 12, 2002, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dammit-i-just-cant-do-it/136186/23 "2002-11-12T00:39:02Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Cervaise \*  
> \*\*Is there a rule against running with a bunch of helium balloons attached to your shoulders?  
> \*\*

I thought of that too. Then I decided that it would be too obvious. Better put them in your shorts.

What was your time after the first year that you set your goal? Perhaps you should just extend your deadline. 4:07 is something to be very proud of. Hell, I’m proud, and I don’t even know you!

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**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\
**Post date:** [November 13, 2002, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dammit-i-just-cant-do-it/136186/24 "2002-11-13T03:25:28Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> Better put them in your shorts.

Hell, you could use those long balloons used to sculpt animals, and – er – _hide_ them.

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