# Damn, Bill. Can't you take a pill? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 11, 2004, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-bill-cant-you-take-a-pill/249898 "2004-06-11T23:24:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-bill-cant-you-take-a-pill/249898/81 "2004-06-13T19:27:59Z")
Apparently, you and I look at “outrage” as two entirely different things. I am not outraged at everything I mock. We also see “pattern” differently: you, for example, have a pattern of expressing your disagreement with, disappointment with, or general disdain for me. I call that a pattern because it has happened more than twice. It happens, in fact, with regularity. Why you choose always to impugn my motives has never been clear to me. You presume whatever is the worst and then run with it. I am no more outraged at Clinton for falling asleep than I am at my ass for itching. A rant need not express outrage; it may express mere indignation. I’m sure that even after explaining myself as I usually end up doing with you, you will have more to say and will show me how I’ve gotten myself all wrong. So thanks in advance for your insights. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-bill-cant-you-take-a-pill/249898/82 "2004-06-13T21:16:21Z")
Never having used the word “paean” in speech before, I am grateful to **Terrifel** for his post. ---
**Author:** ![TeaElle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8491ac/32.png) [@TeaElle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TeaElle)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-bill-cant-you-take-a-pill/249898/83 "2004-06-13T22:00:05Z")
> [@Daisy Mae](#): > > Quite amusing that you pooh pooh all over the Rush flame fest a few posts over but have no problem here trying to fan flames in Clinton’s direction. I guess flame wars are okay as long as it isn’t your political leaning that gets the fire. It’s flaming to point out that a man has a history of being caught on camera laughing (IMO) overexuberantly at funerals? > [@](#): > > Something tells me that Mr. Clinton would be acting inappropriately by your standards no matter what he did at the funeral. And whatever is telling you that would be telling you something false. If Clinton had comported himself at the funeral in the same manner as the other dignitaries and former presidents, I’d have no issue. > [@](#): > > CNN showed a few clips from the California service where Ahhhhnold the Governator was having a bit of a chucklefest, shall we shove an apple in his mouth and mount him upon the spit as well? The only person escalating this to a pigroast is yourself. In any case, if Gov. Schwarznegger had a _history_ of acting in an inappropriately giggly manner at funerals, I’d be as disappointed in him as I am in Clinton. > [@](#): > > But could it be, just possibly, just maybe (sound familiar?) that the Kerry’s and Mr Clinton were speaking of something humorous that Mr Reagan said or did? It’s possible. It sure didn’t look like it. It was a protracted, smiley-faced, gesture-laden, jovial conversation that went on for more than five minutes. > [@](#): > > Some people are BORN to be offended. And some are born to jump to conclusions based upon other’s political affiliations. Pot, this is kettle, we have some things to discuss. Seriously, are you people not aware of Clinton’s prior funeral misbehavior – and the blatant attempt at covering same at Ron Brown’s service when he noticed a television camera in the distance and realized that it wouldn’t do to be filmed leaving the services for a good friend laughing so he evinced a scrunchy crying face and immediately began wiping “tears” from his cheeks? ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-bill-cant-you-take-a-pill/249898/84 "2004-06-13T23:25:12Z")
> [@TeaElle](#): > > Seriously, are you people not aware of Clinton’s prior funeral misbehavior – and the blatant attempt at covering same at Ron Brown’s service when he noticed a television camera in the distance and realized that it wouldn’t do to be filmed leaving the services for a good friend laughing so he evinced a scrunchy crying face and immediately began wiping “tears” from his cheeks? What a load of fetid crap you have vomited on this board! This is entirely fabricated by the right-wing blogmeisters, and you bought it, hook line and stinker. This is just another example of the endless hatred (yet fascination) the right has with Clinton, to the extent that you actually begin to believe the lies you have concocted. Peddle it elsewhere you pustulated crack whore, we’re not buying it. ---
**Author:** ![MysteryFellow63427](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e4f/32.png) [@MysteryFellow63427](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MysteryFellow63427)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2004, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-bill-cant-you-take-a-pill/249898/85 "2004-06-14T22:12:43Z")
> [@TeaElle](#): > > John, Theresa and Bill were laughing so vigorously and for such an extended period I was waiting for one of the embarrassed looking Secret Service agents to poke one of them to remind them that they were at a funeral for frig’s sake. Hell, I hope peple are laughing at my funeral. As long as they’re laughing at me, and not with me. Because that would be really disturbing. ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-bill-cant-you-take-a-pill/249898/86 "2004-06-15T00:32:17Z")
> [@Liberal](#): > > Lord, your wife must think you’re a ball and chain. We’ve secretly replaced the coffee **Lib** usually enjoys with a cup of black tar heroin and broken glass. Let’s watch. ---
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 5:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-bill-cant-you-take-a-pill/249898/87 "2004-06-15T05:07:43Z")
> [@Liberal](#): > > …you will no doubt attribute your abilities to more mundane causes, such as a logical mind superior to my own. :shrug: Occam’s Razor at work. ---
**Author:** ![TeaElle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8491ac/32.png) [@TeaElle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TeaElle)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-bill-cant-you-take-a-pill/249898/88 "2004-06-15T06:20:30Z")
> [@Fear Itself](#): > > What a load of fetid crap you have vomited on this board! This is entirely fabricated by the right-wing blogmeisters, and you bought it, hook line and stinker. Nonsense. It’s on video. It’s been seen. I saw it with my own eyes. Of course, I’m apparently a crack whore, so I suppose I could’ve hallucinated it. :rolleyes: How about a hearty helping of get over yourself juice, Fear Itself? You can disagree or even disbelieve what I have to say without being insulting and juvenile. Talk about cheapening discourse. ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 10:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-bill-cant-you-take-a-pill/249898/89 "2004-06-15T10:56:25Z")
> [@Cervaise](#): > > We’ve secretly replaced the coffee **Lib** usually enjoys with a cup of black tar heroin and broken glass. Let’s watch. I reckon that if I attract your attention enough, you might eventually answer my three-year-old twenty-times-asked question about _Almost Famous_. But then, probably not. ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-bill-cant-you-take-a-pill/249898/90 "2004-06-15T14:52:27Z")
> [@Liberal](#): > > I have the funeral on DVR and have watched it twice. He fell asleep. You have watched the funeral TWICE already?!? Crap, Lib, you need to really rethink this thread if you have to watch a funeral on tape twice within a week just to bitch about something in the Pit. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-bill-cant-you-take-a-pill/249898/91 "2004-06-15T15:35:11Z")
What we should all do the next time we’re at a funeral and we see somebody close his or her eyes is immediately scream: “Hey You! Yes you, you disrespectful, non feeling, cold hearted bastard! How dare you close your eyes! And don’t give me that ‘I was praying’ line! You can’t fool me!” That’ll teach em! ---
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-bill-cant-you-take-a-pill/249898/92 "2004-06-15T15:35:38Z")
> [@Munch](#): > > You have watched the funeral TWICE already?!? Crap, Lib, you need to really rethink this thread if you have to watch a funeral on tape twice within a week just to bitch about something in the Pit. Well, shit, Kerry hasn’t done anything horrible in the last week. And Hillary has kept quiet. What is he **supposed** to do? -Joe ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-bill-cant-you-take-a-pill/249898/93 "2004-06-15T15:57:03Z")
> [@Merijeek](#): > > Well, shit, Kerry hasn’t done anything horrible in the last week. And Hillary has kept quiet. > > What is he **supposed** to do? > > -Joe Wait until the commemorative set (two DVDs or four VHS tapes) comes out and buy it like all **decent Americans** should instead of making secretive pirated tapes of it. Don’t know bout y’all but I’m tellin’ John Ashcroft and Tom Ridge! ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-bill-cant-you-take-a-pill/249898/94 "2004-06-15T16:52:53Z")
> [@JRDelirious](#): > > And as for Clinton, come on, this is really grasping. \ > Now, if he had nodded off completely, pitched forward and headbutted Dick Cheney, that would have been crassly inappropriate. Do woo wealize how mush force is wequired to spoow peanut budder ontwo a monitwer? Wots! _gulp_ I’m no fan of Clinton but I gotta give him a hall pass on this one. Funerals are one time when often it’s often impolite _not_ to have your eyes closed. God knows though that I’d have cashed in my IRA and donated it to the DNC for the chance to have seen the scenario **J.R.D.** described unfold. Bill and Hilary aren’t living together anymore, are they? Heck, that probably hadn’t seen each other in months and spent the entire night before fucking like rabbits in a meth patch. I just can’t get the incensed meter to budge on this one. Now Reagan’s minister? Yeah **Sam and TVeblen** , you’re bang on with that assessment. “I’m so honored… me this… me that…” I was hoping Nancy would turn and say “Hey, STFU!” ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-bill-cant-you-take-a-pill/249898/95 "2004-06-15T17:25:46Z")
> [@swampbear](#): > > What we should all do the next time we’re at a funeral and we see somebody close his or her eyes is immediately scream: “Hey You! Yes you, you disrespectful, non feeling, cold hearted bastard! How dare you close your eyes! And don’t give me that ‘I was praying’ line! You can’t fool me!” I lean toward electrified seats. Bzzzzzzpptttt! I turned to C-Span and watched some of the lying-in-state in the Capitol. I was hypnotized. I imagine I was completely slack-jawed and glazed over, not precisely with boredom, but with _something_. Bill Clinton creeps me out, though I can withstand it so long as he’s not talking. But I definitely give a pass to anyone involved in that mind-numbing event who didn’t actually leap out of their chairs and scream that the fire ants were taking over the world. ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-bill-cant-you-take-a-pill/249898/96 "2004-06-15T20:20:26Z")
> [@Munch](#): > > You have watched the funeral TWICE already?!? Crap, Lib, you need to really rethink this thread if you have to watch a funeral on tape twice within a week just to bitch about something in the Pit. I’ve watched it three times now and finally erased it. Other than the Irish tenor, it was quite beautiful. > [@Jsgoddess](#): > > I turned to C-Span and watched some of the lying-in-state in the Capitol. I was hypnotized. I imagine I was completely slack-jawed and glazed over, not precisely with boredom, but with something. My wife and I loved the repose in the Capitol. We watched it until midnight and got up at about three to watch until its end. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-bill-cant-you-take-a-pill/249898/97 "2004-06-15T20:44:54Z")
Oh, for goodness sake. The Clintons and Betty Ford fell asleep, just like everyone did, when the Russian authorities pumped nerve gas into the funeral to ferret out any Chechen rebels who might have sneaked in. And Clinton and Kerry were laughing about how, at the viewing, Reagan’s corpse was rigged to pop up and go, “Wellll . . . gotcha ya!” ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-bill-cant-you-take-a-pill/249898/98 "2004-06-15T21:01:41Z")
Oh, Eve, there you go again. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Polerius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/d78d45/32.png) [@Polerius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polerius)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-bill-cant-you-take-a-pill/249898/99 "2004-06-15T21:02:32Z")
> [@Liberal](#): > > I have the funeral on DVR and have **watched it twice. He fell asleep**. Why don’t you get a fucking life, instead of rewinding and making sure Clinton was really asleep? What is the fucking deal with the Right’s fucking obsession with Clinton? He fucking fell asleep. Boo hoo hoo! So fucking what? Let’s make it a national scandal! :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-bill-cant-you-take-a-pill/249898/100 "2004-06-15T21:06:02Z")
> [@Polerius](#): > > Why don’t you get a fucking life, instead of rewinding and making sure Clinton was really asleep? Who said anything about rewinding? Why don’t you get a fucking brain? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-bill-cant-you-take-a-pill/249898.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-bill-cant-you-take-a-pill/249898.md?page=6)