# Damn British! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 8, 2000, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-british/5450 "2000-03-08T23:51:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![C\_K\_Dexter\_Haven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b2d939/32.png) [@C\_K\_Dexter\_Haven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/C_K_Dexter_Haven)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2000, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-british/5450/21 "2000-03-09T14:52:00Z")
TomH, that’s 'cause you’re well-behaved. ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2000, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-british/5450/22 "2000-03-09T15:26:00Z")
Well, I’ve always disliked the British, myself. (Might as well alienate another entire spectrum of SDers. Mjollnir STILL isn’t talking to me after I said all those nice things about William Tecumseh Sherman.) The last time I was over in London I spent quite a bit of time with novelists, and the drunker among them insisted on lecturing me about the deficiencies of US journalism, US theater, contemporary US literature, etc. It was difficult to keep my loathing for them in check, to keep from screaming out lines from William Butler Yeats’s “Easter 1916.” No one called me a “colonist,” though. “Communist,” yes, “colonist,” no. * * * Uke ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2000, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-british/5450/23 "2000-03-09T15:46:00Z")
When travelling in Asia, met a Kiwi girl, we were sitting at a beach with a long expansive view, when she suddenly says, ‘Spot the pom, spot the pom!!’ Sure enough, we look up to see, in the distance, up the beach, an unbelievably white person, with a bad hat and black socks headed our way. Once we had a giggle I pointed out to the Kiwi that her judgement could easily be biased, and it was a terrible game, blah, blah, blah. As soon as the beach comber came abreast of us he tipped his bad hat and wished us a cheery good day, through a crusty English accent. We howled and howled, and, I am embarased to admit continued to play, Spot The Pom, for the next 6 months and very rarely were we wrong. Works both ways… * * * “Patriotism is the last refuge to which a scoundrel clings.” Bob Dylan ---
**Author:** ![RussellM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ed8c4c/32.png) [@RussellM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RussellM)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2000, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-british/5450/24 "2000-03-09T15:54:00Z")
Ukulele Ike > [@](#): > > Well, I’ve always disliked the British, myself. > … > The last time I was over in London I spent quite a bit of time with novelists, and the drunker among them insisted on lecturing me … What does disliking the British have to do with disliking a group of drunken journalists? I have met stupid, rude Americans, and the only conclusion I can draw is that \*\* those \*\* people were stupid and rude. I’m sure that you have met people in you own home town that you dislike - do you dislike everyone in your home town? That’s the trouble with you Americans, you all make such sweeping generalisations. Russell ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2000, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-british/5450/25 "2000-03-09T16:00:00Z")
That’s right. All Americans make generalisations. Everybody knows that. * * * **Coldfire** _Voted **Poster Most Likely To Post Drunk** _ * * * _ **"You know how complex women are"** _ - Neil Peart, **Rush** (1993) ---
**Author:** ![cleosia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9dc877/32.png) [@cleosia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cleosia)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2000, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-british/5450/26 "2000-03-09T17:26:00Z")
You’re going to get some national chauvinists wherever you look. Not all British have this “Better-than-thou” attitude, but my friend once worked with an English girl and all she heard from here was that “America was a country without a past.” My friend finally had enough and told her, “Better to be from a country without a past than one without a future!” That did shut her up. Apologies to all you Brits out there (after all you did send us “Monty Python.” Thanks!) but sometimes it’s hard to resist slamming someone like this back. * * * Bitch by Birth ---
**Author:** ![Vivamus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Vivamus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vivamus)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2000, 6:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-british/5450/27 "2000-03-10T06:26:00Z")
Re: ‘Spot the Pom’ Er…Were there no Germans where you were playing? Only that those scamp Germans are forever causing me to lose when I play ‘Spot the Pom’ (especially those ‘d’un certain age’)… Mind you, you can normally hear the Germans coming… ---
**Author:** ![egkelly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/db5fbb/32.png) [@egkelly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/egkelly)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2000, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-british/5450/28 "2000-03-09T19:27:00Z")
Some problems with Brits: (a) they don’t know what deodorant is for (b) they don’t have teeth © they think “toad in the hole” is delicious (d) they think Hugh Grant can act ---
**Author:** ![Ophanim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8491ac/32.png) [@Ophanim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ophanim)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2000, 6:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-british/5450/29 "2000-03-10T06:06:00Z")
WOW! Y’know I posted because I thought it was funny as hell when I wrote it, but it’s really sparked some hatred! Truth is I don’t HATE anyone. I just see pissed off ranting as an artform. So I took the most obscure damned thing I could think of added a generous dose of the word Fuck and got a good laugh. I apologise if I upset any British people. Oh, and since this the Pit, I’d like to yell out a nasty FUCK YOU too… um… whoever responds next. Yeah you… fuck you… you’re an asshole and you just plain piss me off. * * * Kisses! }\>\<(((^\>\<^)))\>\<{ Ophy ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2000, 6:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-british/5450/30 "2000-03-10T06:56:00Z")
You guys are missing the point with all this reasonableness. This is the BBQ Pit. What’s the sense of being here if you’re not going to join in on an illogical emotional rant. So c’mon everyone join in: Queen Elizabeth? Dead! Prince Charles? Dead! Tony Blair? Dead! Nedemeyer? Dead! ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2000, 6:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-british/5450/31 "2000-03-10T06:59:00Z")
Wait a second…Ophy just called me an asshole. Ophanim? Dead! ---
**Author:** ![Ophanim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8491ac/32.png) [@Ophanim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ophanim)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2000, 7:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-british/5450/32 "2000-03-10T07:31:00Z")
Yeah FUCK YOU Nemo! I love your name though! * * * Kisses! }\>\<(((^\>\<^)))\>\<{ Ophy ---
**Author:** ![Major\_Feelgud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3be4f8/32.png) [@Major\_Feelgud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Major_Feelgud)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2000, 7:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-british/5450/33 "2000-03-10T07:37:00Z")
The OP missed the point completely. The Brit meant to say Nudist Colony, not colonist. ---
**Author:** ![tomndebb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@tomndebb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tomndebb)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2000, 1:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-british/5450/34 "2000-03-10T13:00:00Z")
You know, I did hear the colonies quip. Seems there was this braggart Yank (let’s call him John) swaggering around one of the smaller hamlets in Cornwall, making a nuisance of himself, complaining about the food, the lack of central heating, the weather (?), and sundry other things. After about three days, when he had alienated every person in the village, he swaggered up to the clerk at the Royal Post Office and demanded “How much is it to send a letter to **God’s Country**?” To which she replied, “34 pence, same as to all the colonies.” * * * Tom~ ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2000, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-british/5450/35 "2000-03-10T15:32:00Z")
Good God! I hope he pulled his six-shooter and shot her down in her tracks… It’s bad enough to take an insult from those miserable limesucking Teabags, but quite another to be mocked by the CORNISH. ---
**Author:** ![casdave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c6cbf5/32.png) [@casdave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/casdave)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2000, 6:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-british/5450/36 "2000-03-11T06:41:00Z")
Q.Why are U.S standards of intellect and education potrayed to us Brits in our media so low. You can’t be that thick in the head or we’d be richer than you.Right? Sadly quite a lot of you guys think Brits are smart too - IT’S A CON -we’re as stupid as you-proof? well- do you have a monarchy? ---
**Author:** ![Andy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/aeb1de/32.png) [@Andy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Andy)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2000, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-british/5450/37 "2000-03-10T19:25:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by casdave: > Sadly quite a lot of you guys think Brits are > smart too I think, casdave, that you can safely assume that nobody here is of that opinion. ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2000, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-british/5450/38 "2000-03-10T23:02:00Z")
I’m sure you’re all aware that the reason the Brit’s have never built a computer is because they can’t get it to leak oil ! * * * “Patriotism is the last refuge to which a scoundrel clings.” Bob Dylan ---
**Author:** ![Koxinga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/4af34b/32.png) [@Koxinga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koxinga)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2000, 10:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-british/5450/39 "2000-03-11T10:57:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by Ophanim: > **Y’know if I hear another fuckin Brit call me a fuckin colonist again I’m gonna fuckin vomit. . .** I once lived in a hostel in Asia where a couple of English (and I mean _English_, not “British”) guys were staying at the same time as a pair of girls from Hong Kong. After the English guys got drunk one time, they started demanding that the HK girls “bow down to their colonial masters”. They also started accusing half of the Westerners in the hostel of being Jews. I also knew of two French girls that had a schedule written down of which night they got to share a bed with a particular American guy, but that’s a different thread in the making . . . DHR ---
**Author:** ![casdave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c6cbf5/32.png) [@casdave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/casdave)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2000, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-british/5450/40 "2000-03-11T19:55:00Z")
Some of the individuals I admire most are Americans not for that reason though it’s cause of their achievements some people I dislike intensly are Brits for similar but not just cause they’re British. I had no idea that we were important enough to still be hated by some of you I think you should hate someone your own size bullies that you are. 😛 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-british/5450.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-british/5450.md?page=3)