# Das Boot remake? Seriously? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [August 17, 2015, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/das-boot-remake-seriously/728105 "2015-08-17T19:14:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![crypto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b3f665/32.png) [@crypto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/crypto)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2015, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/das-boot-remake-seriously/728105/1 "2015-08-17T19:14:42Z")
With the voting on the greatest war movie of all time, my vote went to Das Boot. And of course, I stumbled onto this nugget: > **[‘Das Boot’ Remake Planned](https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/news/general-news/das-boot-remake-planned-805038/)** > > German studio Bavaria is looking to reboot Wolfgang Petersen’s Oscar-nominated classic. :smack: There are a number of movies which should never be remade. This is one of them. It’s not that the new movie can’t be fantastic in its own right, especially with today’s CGI. But you don’t have to soil the original movie by remaking it. Just call it something else, give it a different plot, and wow us with the visuals. I don’t know. Maybe it’s just me. Das Boot is one of the best movies I have ever seen, war movie or otherwise. Leave the title/franchise alone. Next, The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly will be remade. And all will be lost. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2015, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/das-boot-remake-seriously/728105/2 "2015-08-17T20:22:14Z")
With any luck, this remake will sink ignominiously into oblivion, as do most other remakes. I for one highly doubt any of my dollars will go to seeing it. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2015, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/das-boot-remake-seriously/728105/3 "2015-08-17T20:30:40Z")
Well, it’ll be in development and pre-production for four or five years, and then the cinematography and score will be anachronistically modern, and they’ll heavy-handedly try to make it even more profound than the original… So… a 2020s style depth raise. ---
**Author:** ![Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slow_moving_vehicle/32/291_2.png) [@Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slow_Moving_Vehicle)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2015, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/das-boot-remake-seriously/728105/4 "2015-08-17T20:36:17Z")
> [@Bryan\_Ekers](#): > > Well, it’ll be in development and pre-production for four or five years, and then the cinematography and score will be anachronistically modern, and they’ll heavy-handedly try to make it even more profound than the original… > So… a 2020s style depth raise. Brilliant. I came to post "Das Boot reboot? ", but yours is much better. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2015, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/das-boot-remake-seriously/728105/5 "2015-08-17T21:23:18Z")
**ALARRRRRM!!! ALARRRRRRM!!!** :eek: ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2015, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/das-boot-remake-seriously/728105/6 "2015-08-17T21:24:23Z")
Ooh! I hope J. J. Abrams is on board! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![spifflog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@spifflog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spifflog)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2015, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/das-boot-remake-seriously/728105/7 "2015-08-17T21:30:25Z")
I know it’s virtually sacrilege to say this but . . . so what if they remake this, and the Godfather, and Gone with the Wind, and Name Your Favorite Film of All Time?? It’s not your money. It’s not your time. You don’t have to spend your money or time to see it, and it won’t prevent anyone from seeing the original. Really, so what if it totally sucks, it’s no skin off my nose? Nor yours. People want to make money. And they want to tell stories. And they have a different way, with actors and actresses that speak to today’s audience in a way that they would like it to be told. ---
**Author:** ![Simplicio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c37758/32.png) [@Simplicio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Simplicio)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2015, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/das-boot-remake-seriously/728105/8 "2015-08-17T21:50:00Z")
Gonna be extra awkward when they make the main characters American on this one. I’m with **spifflog** though. I don’t really think a new film really “soils” the original, so I don’t really care if they remake it, though I doubt it’ll be worth seeing. Especially with Das Boot, since with all the recuts, and directors cuts and miniseries and whatever, I’m not sure there _is_ an original film. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2015, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/das-boot-remake-seriously/728105/9 "2015-08-17T21:58:09Z")
> [@Simplicio](#): > > Gonna be extra awkward when they make the main characters American on this one. …With at least one woman, one gay, and one member of each visible minority on board. _Ach du Lieber!_ :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2015, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/das-boot-remake-seriously/728105/10 "2015-08-17T21:58:15Z")
I’m seeing Chris Pine as the new captain. ---
**Author:** ![Archeonomist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/7cd45c/32.png) [@Archeonomist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Archeonomist)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2015, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/das-boot-remake-seriously/728105/11 "2015-08-17T22:06:34Z")
At least it’s the same German studio that made it in the first place. Hopefully that will spare us the tale of Der Alte Ben Stiller, having moral reservations, setting out to thwart their fellow uboats’ attempt at the allied convoy and rescuing Jennifer Aniston from the evil SS along the way. I think the only way a remake could work is if they make it into a tv series long enough to explore more of the book. ---
**Author:** ![Maserschmidt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/maserschmidt/32/18829_2.png) [@Maserschmidt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maserschmidt)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2015, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/das-boot-remake-seriously/728105/12 "2015-08-17T22:23:43Z")
> [@AncientHumanoid](#): > > Ooh! I hope J. J. Abrams is on board! > > 😉 Getting lens flare in a u-boat would be a challenge! But I’ll bet he could pull it off. ---
**Author:** ![Leo\_Krupe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ebca7d/32.png) [@Leo\_Krupe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leo_Krupe)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2015, 10:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/das-boot-remake-seriously/728105/13 "2015-08-17T22:44:39Z")
> [@Maserschmidt](#): > > Getting lens flare in a u-boat would be a challenge! But I’ll bet he could pull it off. But the shaky-cam would be oh-so-easy. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2015, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/das-boot-remake-seriously/728105/14 "2015-08-17T22:55:32Z")
> [@Maserschmidt](#): > > Getting lens flare in a u-boat would be a challenge! But I’ll bet he could pull it off. Pretty simple, really. Tons of flare opportunities every time they: open hatches during surfacing and submerging. look through the periscope in daytime. shoot the sub from outside and below as it crosses under the sun. surface ships fire their naval guns. their torpedoes explode with really flarey light. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2015, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/das-boot-remake-seriously/728105/15 "2015-08-17T22:56:06Z")
> [@Archeonomist](#): > > At least it’s the same German studio that made it in the first place. Hopefully that will spare us the tale of Der Alte Ben Stiller, having moral reservations, setting out to thwart their fellow uboats’ attempt at the allied convoy and rescuing Jennifer Aniston from the evil SS along the way. Anybody remember the article in _ **MAD Magazine** _ where they contrasted movies made during and after WWII? Their U-boat Germans went from _ **“Heil Hitler!”** _ to “Ach, another beautiful Allied ship lost in this stupid, senseless war!” I don’t recall who the evil Nazi captain in the first panel was, but the skipper in the second was (of course!) James Mason. ---
**Author:** ![Declan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecae2f/32.png) [@Declan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Declan)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2015, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/das-boot-remake-seriously/728105/16 "2015-08-17T23:30:37Z")
> [@terentii](#): > > …With at least one woman, one gay, and one member of each visible minority on board. _Ach du Lieber!_ :smack: That would just be remaking operation petticoat. Declan ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2015, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/das-boot-remake-seriously/728105/17 "2015-08-18T00:00:13Z")
> [@terentii](#): > > …With at least one woman, one gay, and one member of each visible minority on board. _Ach du Lieber!_ :smack: Don’t forget the Jewish executive officer. ---
**Author:** ![Battle\_Pope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4bbf92/32.png) [@Battle\_Pope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Battle_Pope)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2015, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/das-boot-remake-seriously/728105/18 "2015-08-18T00:24:40Z")
This time the film will focus on the American captain of the British destroyer hunting the U-boat. The U-boat captain will be the same one who torpedoed the Lusitania, killing the American’s parents. In a strange twist of fate both the American captain and U-boat commander will be in love with the same girl they met in while on leave in Casablanca before the war. The American captain will be played by Brad Pitt. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2015, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/das-boot-remake-seriously/728105/19 "2015-08-18T00:31:39Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > Pretty simple, really. Tons of flare opportunities every time they: > open hatches during surfacing and submerging. > look through the periscope in daytime. > shoot the sub from outside and below as it crosses under the sun. > surface ships fire their naval guns. > their torpedoes explode with really flarey light. Or when Tony Curtis smiles. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2015, 1:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/das-boot-remake-seriously/728105/20 "2015-08-18T01:31:39Z")
> [@Rick](#): > > Don’t forget the Jewish executive officer. Oy, vay! I’m such a shlemiel! :smack: What would Great-grandma Matkevich back in Austria–Hungary say? ☹ [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/das-boot-remake-seriously/728105.md?page=2)