# Dating a doctor vs. dating a bassonist **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [August 5, 2018, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-a-doctor-vs-dating-a-bassonist/819116 "2018-08-05T03:40:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Sveltington](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3ab097/32.png) [@Sveltington](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sveltington)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2018, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-a-doctor-vs-dating-a-bassonist/819116/21 "2018-08-05T18:36:20Z")
Dating a doctor vs. dating a bassoonist I would want to date the bassoonist. Purely on a romantic level I would always choose an artist/musician over a doctor ( or any similar profession.) ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2018, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-a-doctor-vs-dating-a-bassonist/819116/22 "2018-08-05T18:51:55Z")
How do Jewish mothers feel about bassoonists? ---
**Author:** ![mack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mack)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2018, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-a-doctor-vs-dating-a-bassonist/819116/23 "2018-08-05T22:03:40Z")
In an episode of Law and Order, a victim’s rehearsal room mate says “the oboe is the most underappreciated instrument in the orchestra “. To which Lenny Brisco replies “it’s an ill wind that no one blows good”. Scale that up for bassoon. Sorry, that’s all I got. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2018, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-a-doctor-vs-dating-a-bassonist/819116/24 "2018-08-05T22:13:38Z")
Which one has the most money? ---
**Author:** ![DavidwithanR](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@DavidwithanR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidwithanR)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2018, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-a-doctor-vs-dating-a-bassonist/819116/25 "2018-08-05T22:26:38Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > Which one has the most money? If the bassoon player is VERY bad and plays VERY often, then there’s an increased likelihood of his being paid several million to quit. However, a good bassoon player is paid less than a doctor. A good doctor who’s also an extremely bad bassoonist with a lot of spare time would be pretty much set for life. Not as well off as the doctor/bad-bagpiper-with-fleas combination, but in the ballpark I’d say. Though I don’t know why you’d play the bassoon in a ballpark. ---
**Author:** ![DavidwithanR](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@DavidwithanR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidwithanR)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2018, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-a-doctor-vs-dating-a-bassonist/819116/26 "2018-08-05T22:35:42Z")
> [@mack](#): > > In an episode of Law and Order, a victim’s rehearsal room mate says “the oboe is the most underappreciated instrument in the orchestra “. To which Lenny Brisco replies “it’s an ill wind that no one blows good”. > > Scale that up for bassoon. > > Sorry, that’s all I got. In my experience, the oboe is OVERappreciated. Because it receives about the same appreciation as other boring instruments, but doesn’t deserve that. The bassoon is much less offensive generally than the oboe. That’s why really bad bassoonists get the big bucks for quitting - really bad oboists are shot before anyone thinks of negotiating. ---
**Author:** ![DavidwithanR](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@DavidwithanR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidwithanR)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2018, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-a-doctor-vs-dating-a-bassonist/819116/27 "2018-08-05T22:42:33Z")
> [@Riemann](#): > > How do Jewish mothers feel about bassoonists? The feeling is mutual. ---
**Author:** ![DavidwithanR](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@DavidwithanR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidwithanR)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2018, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-a-doctor-vs-dating-a-bassonist/819116/28 "2018-08-05T22:50:27Z")
> [@tim-n-va](#): > > If the doctor is an optometrist, sex will be a constant question: better like this or better like this? An ER doctor might be better - they pretty much always make things work out right somehow, and are used to doing it all night. ---
**Author:** ![DavidwithanR](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@DavidwithanR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidwithanR)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2018, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-a-doctor-vs-dating-a-bassonist/819116/29 "2018-08-05T22:52:02Z")
> [@Chicken\_Fingers](#): > > In unrelated news, I have known a crumhorn-playing doctor. Needless to say, he was happily married. That’s good. Deaf spouses are not always easy to find. ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2018, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-a-doctor-vs-dating-a-bassonist/819116/30 "2018-08-05T23:40:55Z")
> [@DavidwithanR](#): > > Basselope: [parts of speech SNIPPED] \ There is only one Basselope, and her name is Rosebud. She flies by inflating her antlers with helium or dandelion gas. Propulsion is provided by farting. ---
**Author:** ![DavidwithanR](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@DavidwithanR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidwithanR)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2018, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-a-doctor-vs-dating-a-bassonist/819116/31 "2018-08-06T02:47:30Z")
> [@Morgyn](#): > > \ There is only one Basselope, and her name is Rosebud. She flies by inflating her antlers with helium or dandelion gas. Propulsion is provided by farting. Who has to do the farting? Is dandelion gas made through fractional distillation of dandelions, or through fractional distillation of crude oil BY dandelions? Or do you mean vaporized dandelions? Was there a nuclear war and no one told me? ETA I forgot the most important question - Is this basselope primarily a fish, or primarily a musical instrument? ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2018, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-a-doctor-vs-dating-a-bassonist/819116/32 "2018-08-06T04:05:15Z")
Are bassonists as good as jazz saxophonists? :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![DavidwithanR](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@DavidwithanR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidwithanR)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2018, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-a-doctor-vs-dating-a-bassonist/819116/33 "2018-08-06T04:43:37Z")
> [@terentii](#): > > Are bassonists as good as jazz saxophonists? :dubious: Bassoonists have never called each other “cats”, because they all have actual, you know, cats. Other than that… As good for what? ---
**Author:** ![mack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mack)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2018, 9:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-a-doctor-vs-dating-a-bassonist/819116/34 "2018-08-06T09:32:21Z")
> [@DavidwithanR](#): > > Bassoonists have never called each other “cats”, because they all have actual, you know, cats. > > Other than that… As good for what? Unless I’m mistaken it’s a reference to the Seinfeld episode where Elaine finally succeeds in getting her Saxophonist boyfriend to perform oral sex. However… [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/m8xsSAm0FMc/maxresdefault.jpg "Seinfeld - Avantgarde Jazz") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8xsSAm0FMc) The people sitting in front are record company scouts. ---
**Author:** ![PatrickLondon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/patricklondon/32/4422_2.png) [@PatrickLondon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatrickLondon)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2018, 9:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-a-doctor-vs-dating-a-bassonist/819116/35 "2018-08-06T09:53:06Z")
If things get that far, think twice about setting up house with a gynaecologist. I heard they tend to paint the hallway through the letterbox. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2018, 12:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-a-doctor-vs-dating-a-bassonist/819116/36 "2018-08-06T12:57:09Z")
Rosebud is neither primarily fish nor musical instrument. She’s primarily a basset hound. ---
**Author:** ![DavidwithanR](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@DavidwithanR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidwithanR)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2018, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-a-doctor-vs-dating-a-bassonist/819116/37 "2018-08-06T13:29:57Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > Rosebud is neither primarily fish nor musical instrument. She’s primarily a basset hound. A-ha! So she’s a bassetelope with letters missing! She needs a basset horn, not a bassoon! (Calling her a basselope is almost - but not quite - as egregious a linguistic error as making a higher-range bassoon and calling it a tenoroon. Which was done, unfortunately. But can you imagine what kind of dog a Petit basse griffon Vendéen might be? This creates a whole new messe, if not a messe basse. :)) ---
**Author:** ![Serenata67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/serenata67/32/10646_2.png) [@Serenata67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Serenata67)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2018, 1:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-a-doctor-vs-dating-a-bassonist/819116/38 "2018-08-06T13:35:20Z")
> [@mack](#): > > In an episode of Law and Order, a victim’s rehearsal room mate says “the oboe is the most underappreciated instrument in the orchestra “. To which Lenny Brisco replies “it’s an ill wind that no one blows good”. > > Scale that up for bassoon. > > Sorry, that’s all I got. What’s an oboe good for? Setting a bassoon on fire. ---
**Author:** ![Jasmine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jasmine/32/2964_2.png) [@Jasmine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jasmine)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2018, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-a-doctor-vs-dating-a-bassonist/819116/39 "2018-08-06T13:36:01Z")
Marry the doctor because he earns the most and have an affair with whoever else is the hottest. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2018, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-a-doctor-vs-dating-a-bassonist/819116/40 "2018-08-06T14:01:38Z")
> [@mack](#): > > Unless I’m mistaken it’s a reference to the Seinfeld episode where Elaine finally succeeds in getting her Saxophonist boyfriend to perform oral sex. However… > > [https://youtu.be/m8xsSAm0FMc](https://youtu.be/m8xsSAm0FMc) > > The people sitting in front are record company scouts. Yes. At first, he didn’t do “everything,” but she got him to “expand his repertoire.” 🆒 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-a-doctor-vs-dating-a-bassonist/819116.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-a-doctor-vs-dating-a-bassonist/819116.md?page=3)