# Dating fellow checkout employees **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 12, 2014, 1:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-fellow-checkout-employees/688276 "2014-05-12T13:47:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![markdash](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba8739/32.png) [@markdash](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/markdash)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2014, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-fellow-checkout-employees/688276/21 "2014-05-12T21:05:30Z")
“Hey [name], would you like to get coffee sometime?” Done. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2014, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-fellow-checkout-employees/688276/22 "2014-05-12T21:09:55Z")
> [@Michael\_Winters](#): > > Out of curiosity, has anyone ever dated a checkout coworker? I did once, but it didn’t work out. She kept asking me to double-bag it. ---
**Author:** ![Inna\_Minnit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Inna\_Minnit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inna_Minnit)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2014, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-fellow-checkout-employees/688276/23 "2014-05-13T01:20:10Z")
Welcome, Michael. You are 6’ 5". Aren’t women usually shorter than you? Or do you date Amazons? ---
**Author:** ![Heropsychodreamer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a88e4f/32.png) [@Heropsychodreamer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Heropsychodreamer)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2014, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-fellow-checkout-employees/688276/24 "2014-05-13T01:51:31Z")
I met my current wife when she was a checkout person and I was checkout person/book-keeper. We chatted casually during slow times then I asked her out to a hockey game (hockey game? long story). The rest is history. I know of 2 other people who met and married while i worked there and there was a lot of dating going on. I always wondered if that was a normal grocery store thing. At this store, there were a lot of young workers (22 and under) from a few surrounding towns so you were never hanging around with your usual friends from school/town and it made for a flirty dynamic. ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Winters](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e8c25b/32.png) [@Michael\_Winters](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Winters)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2014, 1:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-fellow-checkout-employees/688276/25 "2014-05-13T01:53:07Z")
> [@Inna\_Minnit](#): > > Welcome, Michael. You are 6’ 5". Aren’t women usually shorter than you? Or do you date Amazons? My last girlfriend (who is now one of my 2 best friends) was only a little shorter than I was. Her dad was 6’7" or 7’, I can’t remember. I didn’t have to bend over to kiss her, which was nice. So yes, I suppose you’re right. However, I’m tall for a guy, and from my experience she’s short for a girl. Add to this the fact that guys are, on average, taller than girls and that’s where I stand (pun fully intended). ---
**Author:** ![Inna\_Minnit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Inna\_Minnit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inna_Minnit)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2014, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-fellow-checkout-employees/688276/26 "2014-05-13T02:00:16Z")
> [@Oakminster](#): > > Dude…don’t shit where you eat. Find your girls outside of work. Otherwise, if things don’t work out, things at work will likely become…awkward. You know, normally I agree with this. But this isn’t a career for either of them. It’s a job during school on their way to something better. ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Winters](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e8c25b/32.png) [@Michael\_Winters](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Winters)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2014, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-fellow-checkout-employees/688276/27 "2014-05-13T02:06:23Z")
> [@Inna\_Minnit](#): > > You know, normally I agree with this. But this isn’t a career for either of them. It’s a job during school on their way to something better. We’re both at uni. And I’m transferring to another location soon. Far enough away that we won’t be coworkers anymore, but close enough that I still live in the city. I’m making it sound like a huge move, but you know how supermarkets are - there’s one every couple of kilometres. Basically I’ll still be living nearby but not working together anymore. As for not dating coworkers: 1: I wanna be a novelist, so no coworkers there and 2: if I can’t become a novelist I’m gonna be a journalist. I wouldnt’t wanna be a journo dating another journo. The hours suck and the further up the ladder you get the more competitive things become. ---
**Author:** ![Princhester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Princhester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Princhester)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2014, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-fellow-checkout-employees/688276/28 "2014-05-13T02:18:44Z")
While I broadly agree with what others are saying, this girl if bookish may be introverted and may panic at a sudden invitation and say no when if she’d had a bit of warm up might say yes. See if you can’t strike up a bit of a conversation one time. Then ask her for a coffee the next, when she’s had a moment to process what she thinks of you. > [@Oakminster](#): > > Dude…don’t shit where you eat. Find your girls outside of work. Otherwise, if things don’t work out, things at work will likely become…awkward. What **Inna Minnit** said. I had a retail job when I was working my way through college. There were two girls there for which (I’m pretty sure) there was mutual attraction but which I never asked out based on a concern about not dating co-workers. Now I look back with regret and laugh at the very idea that it would have mattered a damn if I \*had \*stuffed up some temporary retail job by screwing the crew. ---
**Author:** ![Princhester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Princhester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Princhester)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2014, 2:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-fellow-checkout-employees/688276/29 "2014-05-13T02:25:21Z")
Mutual attraction between each of them and I, not between the two girls, I mean. Well, at least as far as I know. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2014, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-fellow-checkout-employees/688276/30 "2014-05-13T02:53:45Z")
Focus on the task at hand and stop giving so much thought to the many various possible outcomes. Over thinking it will only add to your anxiety. ---
**Author:** ![Inna\_Minnit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Inna\_Minnit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inna_Minnit)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2014, 6:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-fellow-checkout-employees/688276/31 "2014-05-13T06:40:49Z")
> [@Princhester](#): > > Mutual attraction between each of them and I, not between the two girls, I mean. Well, at least as far as I know. That could be a start to a fun piece of fiction… ---
**Author:** ![Becky2844](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Becky2844](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Becky2844)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2014, 7:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-fellow-checkout-employees/688276/32 "2014-05-13T07:54:06Z")
With both of you being students you have a great opportunity to ask if she’d like to go to a student activity with you—game, lecture, film etc. ---
**Author:** ![chappachula](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d2c977/32.png) [@chappachula](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chappachula)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2014, 8:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-fellow-checkout-employees/688276/33 "2014-05-13T08:19:01Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > I did once, but it didn’t work out. She kept asking me to double-bag it. you win the thread. 🙂 > [@Inna Minnit](#): > > Or do you date Amazons? When I read this, I actually thought for a moment: “wow–I didn’t know that they added a dating option at Amazon. How do I add that to my cart?” (sorry) As for the OP’s dilemma–here’s a suggestion: If you’re nervous about a date, try something less romantic. The main thing you have in common with her right now is books. Look at whatever she is reading right now. Tell her it sounds interesting, and ask her if you can borrow her copy and read it yourself when she’s finished. See how she reacts at the idea, and then after you read it, say something intelligent about the contents, and see how she reacts to your comments. Then you’ll have more confidence for that coffee date. ---
**Author:** ![sandra\_nz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eada6e/32.png) [@sandra\_nz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sandra_nz)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2014, 8:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-fellow-checkout-employees/688276/34 "2014-05-13T08:25:06Z")
Rather than asking her if she wants to go for coffee and talk about books, it might be better to start some conversations going, e.g. ‘I noticed you are reading \. I love \, have you read it?’ or ‘I love \. Have you ever read \?’ ---
**Author:** ![Heracles](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heracles/32/487_2.png) [@Heracles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Heracles)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 10:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-fellow-checkout-employees/688276/35 "2014-05-14T10:27:58Z")
“This book? Oh, it’s just a stupid assignment for my class. Hey, wanna go out to the Monster Truck Spectacular on Saturday?” ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Winters](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e8c25b/32.png) [@Michael\_Winters](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Winters)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2014, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-fellow-checkout-employees/688276/36 "2014-05-24T03:49:44Z")
Ok imma do this either today or tomorrow. Thing is she works 3.5 hours linger than me. Would it be better to try to “accidentally” run into her tomorrow after she gets off work? What do you guys think would be less awkward? ---
**Author:** ![Inna\_Minnit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Inna\_Minnit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inna_Minnit)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2014, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-fellow-checkout-employees/688276/37 "2014-05-24T04:05:54Z")
Accidentally? Yeah if you want her to think you are stalking her. Just ask her already. ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2014, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-fellow-checkout-employees/688276/38 "2014-05-24T04:13:21Z")
> [@Doctor\_Jackson](#): > > Maybe something like “Hey, I noticed you read a lot - so do I! Want to grab a coffee/soda/ice cream after work and talk about what we’re reading?” Or most of the way though a busy shift when both of you have a brief respite from the horses of food buyers say something like “What a day, I’m gonna need a cup of coffee after this. Care to join me?” ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2014, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-fellow-checkout-employees/688276/39 "2014-05-24T04:27:14Z")
My general advice is don’t date co-workers. ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Winters](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e8c25b/32.png) [@Michael\_Winters](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Winters)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2014, 8:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-fellow-checkout-employees/688276/40 "2014-05-24T08:09:19Z")
> [@Rick](#): > > Or most of the way though a busy shift when both of you have a brief respite from the horses of food buyers say something like > “What a day, I’m gonna need a cup of coffee after this. Care to join me?” “Horses of food buyers” took me a while. That’s not a bad idea. Thanks. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-fellow-checkout-employees/688276.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-fellow-checkout-employees/688276.md?page=3)