# Dating Sites.. Really??? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 31, 2014, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-sites-really/703075 "2014-10-31T01:43:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![interface2x](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c0e974/32.png) [@interface2x](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/interface2x)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2014, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-sites-really/703075/41 "2014-11-04T01:11:07Z")
> [@elmwood](#): > > Basically, most of us, men and women, lead rather boring, ordinary lives. We might like the idea of non-stop excitement, but very few really have that kind of lifestyle. It’s not just enough to be attractive and intelligent, but also _interesting_. For most (e.g. those who aren’t immersed in nerd culture), that means adventure of some kind. “C’mon, and join my adventures” has a lot more appeal “Let’s just chill on the couch and Netflix”, but what’s more common in a relationship? I was involved in a discussion on Reddit about this very topic and that’s the exact pov that was expressed. One girl talked about how both she and her boyfriend had all kinds of outdoor activities listed on their profiles and now they spend most of their weekends together on the couch watching Netflix. ---
**Author:** ![leftfield6](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leftfield6/32/18780_2.png) [@leftfield6](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/leftfield6)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2014, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-sites-really/703075/42 "2014-11-04T01:19:06Z")
> [@faithfool](#): > > It’s a shame there’s no way to tell someone is a colossal asshole by their picture alone… Sure there is. [Proof](http://www.lastwordonnothing.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/09/trump.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![leftfield6](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leftfield6/32/18780_2.png) [@leftfield6](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/leftfield6)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2014, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-sites-really/703075/43 "2014-11-04T01:20:47Z")
> [@jayrey](#): > > In my experience in online dating, every guy I met, except one, had lied about his height by about 2 inches. As a tall woman, it really irritated me. > > I, too, was leery of the guys who were into bicycling and skiing and boating and working out and hiking and . . . and . . . I wondered when they’d find time for the relationship. Then I recognized that, because my commitment to my riding, I didn’t have time for a relationship either. Having all those interests and activities cuts both ways. When I realized I wasn’t interested in giving up my horse time for a relationship, I deleted my profiles and have been much happier. But that isn’t the right choice for everyone, of course. Quite the devilish post there. (check your number of posts) I’m 5’11" btw. I could lie about the one inch and say six foot, but why the hell would i? ---
**Author:** ![PookahMacPhellimey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pookahmacphellimey/32/3175_2.png) [@PookahMacPhellimey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PookahMacPhellimey)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2014, 12:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-sites-really/703075/44 "2014-11-04T12:05:56Z")
> [@Stringbean](#): > > Porkers can work wonders to trick you. You gotta check every single picture and if there ain’t a full-body shot taken from a reasonable distance you can bank on her being a porker. I’m in favour of honesty and honest photos. But do you really need to call larger women “porkers”? ---
**Author:** ![Trom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/958977/32.png) [@Trom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trom)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2014, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-sites-really/703075/45 "2014-11-04T15:33:35Z")
On [match.com](http://match.com) specifically, probably because their choices are stupid. How I approach the choices: Slender: Nope, I have never been described as slender. About average: Ehhh… maybe. But then, as you say, the average person is overweight and nonathletic - which I am not. Heavy set/A few extra pounds/Stocky: These three seperate choices are all synonyms for fat in my mind. Again, not me. So I’m left with… Athletic and toned: Yes, I’m athletic. I can do 10+ pull ups, run miles without stopping, and I play ice hockey multiple times each week. Am I toned in the sense you think of a Men’s Health cover model? No way. So, I view my possible choices as skinny, fat, or athletic and toned. Athletic and toned is the closest option. ---
**Author:** ![Omar\_Little](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omar_little/32/269_2.png) [@Omar\_Little](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omar_Little)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2014, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-sites-really/703075/46 "2014-11-04T16:17:33Z")
> [@QuickSilver](#): > > I do hope the OP’s dating profile user name isn’t the same as her user name here. That would be an instant click-next. What happened to Greg’s dad? ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2014, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-sites-really/703075/47 "2014-11-04T17:26:09Z")
All I know is I am having the time of my life online dating. I wish I had done this A LONG time ago. Fucking awesome. Yes, there are pitfalls but that’s why you do your homework. ---
**Author:** ![Misnomer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/misnomer/32/14897_2.png) [@Misnomer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Misnomer)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2014, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-sites-really/703075/48 "2014-11-04T17:44:00Z")
I’m a porker, and I make sure that my profile pictures include several full-body views. I’ve always been honest about who I am/how I look, but these days at 43 I’m definitely too damn old to pretend to be something I’m not. No MySpace angles, etc. My main picture isn’t even the best one of me (as OKCupid loves to point out), but it’s the most recent and is definitely what I look like. If someone likes it enough to look at my profile, that’s a good start. I can’t stand the idea of someone meeting me without having a truthful idea of my size/shape. I even sometimes ask friends to look at my profile and tell me if they think the pictures are good representations. The problem with the labels available on most sites is that curvy/heavyset/stocky/etc. all mean different things to different people. I haven’t looked at my OKC profile in a while but I’m pretty sure it says “overweight”: it’s both simple and true, and I’m glad that was an option. Whether I’m _too_ overweight is left to the eye of the beholder. ---
**Author:** ![handsomeharry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e9c0ed/32.png) [@handsomeharry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handsomeharry)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2014, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-sites-really/703075/49 "2014-11-06T00:17:06Z")
> [@Namkcalb](#): > > Well, many people only become fat once they secure a mate. You mean “…only become _curvy_…” ---
**Author:** ![handsomeharry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e9c0ed/32.png) [@handsomeharry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handsomeharry)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2014, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-sites-really/703075/50 "2014-11-06T00:19:42Z")
> [@Omar\_Little](#): > > What happened to Greg’s dad? He got athletic and toned, took up para-sailing and ran off with his instructor. His wife was too much of a liar. ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2014, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-sites-really/703075/51 "2014-11-06T01:04:31Z")
> [@PookahMacPhellimey](#): > > I’m in favour of honesty and honest photos. But do you really need to call larger women “porkers”? Apparently. That’s his schtick. ---
**Author:** ![Arcite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/67e7ee/32.png) [@Arcite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arcite)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2014, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-sites-really/703075/52 "2014-11-06T15:25:37Z")
> [@handsomeharry](#): > > You mean “…only become _curvy_…” What’s most interesting is how they become a big, beautiful woman. ---
**Author:** ![Misnomer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/misnomer/32/14897_2.png) [@Misnomer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Misnomer)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2014, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-sites-really/703075/53 "2014-11-06T15:58:35Z")
> [@Arcite](#): > > What’s most interesting is how they become a big, beautiful woman. I thought that didn’t happen until after the divorce. ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2014, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-sites-really/703075/54 "2014-11-06T20:18:16Z")
> [@Cubsfan](#): > > I met up with an online match when I was desperate and lonely back in 2002ish. Even back then I knew the rules: 1) Don’t meet a chick with a picture that looks old 2) Don’t meet a chick with a picture taken from a distance 3) Don’t meet a chick who has only one picture and there’s lots of shadows in it. > > I went to a bar to meet her and she was very VERY unattractive and VERY weird. Major case of the snaggletooth. Kinda like a jackolantern but in real life, and unattractive. She was, what is described as a BBW in todays terms, but back then was self described as “average”. Spent about 15 minutes drinking a beer with her and decided there was no way I could fake it for a few more hours. Told her I didn’t think it was a match and rolled out, leaving her at the bar. > > It’s the only time in my life I’ve EVER bailed out on a date, and I truly felt bad for her, but HELL NO… She has only herself to blame for that one. Don’t feel one bit bad for her. > [@Misnomer](#): > > I’m a porker, and I make sure that my profile pictures include several full-body views. I’ve always been honest about who I am/how I look, but these days at 43 I’m definitely too damn old to pretend to be something I’m not. No MySpace angles, etc. My main picture isn’t even the best one of me (as OKCupid loves to point out), but it’s the most recent and is definitely what I look like. If someone likes it enough to look at my profile, that’s a good start. I can’t stand the idea of someone meeting me without having a truthful idea of my size/shape. Hey, I’m fat and 43 too! I don’t want to waste my time communicating with and then meeting someone who is definitely not going to be attracted to me when he finds out what I really look like. I have better things to do. If he looks at my full-body photo, thinks I’m too fat for his tastes, and moves on without messaging me, then great. I get the same result with absolutely zero effort on my part. ---
**Author:** ![Misnomer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/misnomer/32/14897_2.png) [@Misnomer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Misnomer)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2014, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-sites-really/703075/55 "2014-11-06T20:30:40Z")
> [@Green\_Bean](#): > > Hey, I’m fat and 43 too! I don’t want to waste my time communicating with and then meeting someone who is definitely not going to be attracted to me when he finds out what I really look like. I have better things to do. If he looks at my full-body photo, thinks I’m too fat for his tastes, and moves on without messaging me, then great. I get the same result with absolutely zero effort on my part. Exactly! I wonder if it’s mostly younger fat women who feel the need to lie/be coy about their appearance…? ---
**Author:** ![JustinC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/justinc/32/8083_2.png) [@JustinC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JustinC)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2014, 8:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-sites-really/703075/56 "2014-11-07T08:10:09Z")
Everything I write is a lie. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-sites-really/703075.md?page=2)