# Dating your sister in law's sister **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 28, 2015, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-your-sister-in-laws-sister/716234 "2015-03-28T20:53:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2015, 6:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-your-sister-in-laws-sister/716234/21 "2015-03-29T06:05:04Z")
Two of my classmates had identical names. Their fathers were brothers; their mothers were sisters; they were born within hours of each other. And some asshole allowed both sets of parents to give them identical firstnames. And then, they got to attend the same school, so they got to be in the same class. At least they looked different, that helped. I know several other cases of siblings married to siblings. Other than affecting the splitting of holidays and the drawing of family trees, it doesn’t seem to cause much trouble. At least, so long as nobody is stupid enough to repeat firstnames… ---
**Author:** ![Claverhouse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/13edae/32.png) [@Claverhouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Claverhouse)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2015, 7:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-your-sister-in-laws-sister/716234/22 "2015-03-29T07:33:44Z")
Didn’t they make a documentary about this ? Starred Howard Keel. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2015, 7:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-your-sister-in-laws-sister/716234/23 "2015-03-29T07:37:29Z")
My father married his twin brother’s wife’s younger sister, AKA my late mother, AKA Earth’s greatest woman. Mom and Dad were very happy for nearly 50 years. ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2015, 7:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-your-sister-in-laws-sister/716234/24 "2015-03-29T07:53:53Z")
Ask your Bro and SIL first. ---
**Author:** ![Isilder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/cc9497/32.png) [@Isilder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isilder)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2015, 11:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-your-sister-in-laws-sister/716234/25 "2015-03-29T11:35:20Z")
> [@Penfeather](#): > > Everything lasts to the end. Hopefully he meant a natural or accidental dead end. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2015, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-your-sister-in-laws-sister/716234/26 "2015-03-29T14:36:31Z")
I’m down with going for it. I’ve known like relationships that have gone well and some that have gone very badly; but I can say that about every kind of relationship you can dream up. The only one I can recall sort of unique was an older brother (by 13 years) who married his SILs mom. They got points for originality. ---
**Author:** ![ftg](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ftg/32/2801_2.png) [@ftg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ftg)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2015, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-your-sister-in-laws-sister/716234/27 "2015-03-29T16:26:58Z")
In my genealogical research, I found this a _lot_. Two brothers marrying the sisters from the farm next door. Both **Mrs. FtG** and myself have this in our family trees as recently as the late 1800s. With people moving around more, living in urban areas, it has merely become less common, that’s all. Any social stigma would be a recent development. ---
**Author:** ![LurkerInNJ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ed655f/32.png) [@LurkerInNJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LurkerInNJ)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2015, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-your-sister-in-laws-sister/716234/28 "2015-03-29T19:35:20Z")
In my extended family we have a few instances of this. Two brothers marrying two sisters, etc. No problems. I suppose a lot depends on your family dynamics as a whole. If you come from a family where family is very important and overall very supportive of one another or is it dysfunction junction? ---
**Author:** ![Simplicio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c37758/32.png) [@Simplicio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Simplicio)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2015, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-your-sister-in-laws-sister/716234/29 "2015-03-29T21:07:10Z")
> [@kopek](#): > > I’m down with going for it. I’ve known like relationships that have gone well and some that have gone very badly; but I can say that about every kind of relationship you can dream up. The only one I can recall sort of unique was an older brother (by 13 years) who married his SILs mom. They got points for originality. If he was already close to the SIL, I’d say it might be worth going for it. The potential drama involved with dating a family member is greater, but if he knew the SIL well and felt there was a decent chance of a relationship, maybe its worth the risk. But it doesn’t sound like that’s the case, and there’s plenty of people that are “pretty hot and seem like a nice person”, most of which probably aren’t already related to the OP (and probably live closer than a few hours away, as well). Seems a better plan to just ask some of them out, instead of risking the extra drama and awkward future family get-togeathers for a girl the OP barely knows. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2015, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-your-sister-in-laws-sister/716234/30 "2015-03-29T21:21:15Z")
Wouldn’t any way of meeting a potential partner entail some extra risk of drama? If it’s someone you work with, then you risk extra drama at work. If it’s someone from your gardening club, then you risk extra drama when you go gardening. If it’s someone from church, then you risk extra drama when you go to church. If a mutual friend introduced you, then you risk extra drama whenever that mutual friend is involved. There’s no such thing as a relationship that eliminates the drama risk. Now, the risk might be somewhat higher for a match like this, because you can’t change who you’re related to, but it still needs to be compared to the fairly high baseline. ---
**Author:** ![Miss\_Mapp](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miss_mapp/32/369_2.png) [@Miss\_Mapp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miss_Mapp)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2015, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-your-sister-in-laws-sister/716234/31 "2015-03-29T21:28:37Z")
Two of my uncles married sisters back in the 1970s. Both couples are still married. ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2015, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-your-sister-in-laws-sister/716234/32 "2015-03-29T23:38:44Z")
> [@protoboard](#): > > Would it be appropriate to date the sister of your brother’s wife? … and I wonder if it’s considered taboo to date someone who is closely related to someone you are related to by marriage. It’s very common, not a taboo, and not inappropriate. Just be aware of the potential pitfalls. ---
**Author:** ![Tamex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ccd318/32.png) [@Tamex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tamex)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2015, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-your-sister-in-laws-sister/716234/33 "2015-03-30T01:11:05Z")
Worked for my grandfather as well, and both marriages lasted until death did they part. And nobody repeated first names either when naming the children. (Seriously? That is bizarre.) ---
**Author:** ![tapu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/49beb7/32.png) [@tapu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tapu)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2015, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-your-sister-in-laws-sister/716234/34 "2015-03-30T01:17:20Z")
Happens a lot where I’m from. (Not Maine–OH/WV border) I’m not sure why that would be… Anyway, the two couples’ children are called “double cousins.” ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2015, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-your-sister-in-laws-sister/716234/35 "2015-03-30T01:43:17Z")
> [@Tamex](#): > > Worked for my grandfather as well, and both marriages lasted until death did they part. And nobody repeated first names either when naming the children. (Seriously? That is bizarre.) Different cultures have different naming conventions. In some parts of Europe, during certain times, almost every male member of the family would have the same, exact name. That’s one of the reasons that diminutives/nicknames are so common in Anglo-American culture—there were only so many “real” names to go around. In ancient Rome, all women were named after their fathers: A man named “Claudius,” every single one of his daughters were officially named “Claudia.” As a matter of informal usage, they had to come up with nicknames. In my ethnic background, it is taboo to give a child a given name the same as _any_ known relative, living or dead, within a certain number of generations, regardless of whether they have the same family name or not. Even outside that number of generations, it’s rare to name a child _after_ a relative. It’s just not done. ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2015, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-your-sister-in-laws-sister/716234/36 "2015-03-30T01:50:02Z")
If your SIL was your SIL because she’s your wife’s sister, then it’d be bad. But your situation sounds OK. Of course, if you break up, it will be awkward FOREVER. But hey, some people do awkward well. ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2015, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-your-sister-in-laws-sister/716234/37 "2015-03-30T02:35:18Z")
> [@tuesdayweld](#): > > I read your post and cringed. \ but I will implore you to notice that there are 50 million or so other beautiful 20 year old girls not that far from you, and at age 25 you have a really good shot at meeting many of them. Go do that. It’ll divert you from taking a huge risk that has all the potential to haunt you for the rest of your life. Gotta agree with **tuesdayweld** here. She lives a couple of hours away, if it ends badly, you’re going to be able to walk away & never deal with it again because of your brother & SiL. Just NO. ---
**Author:** ![missred](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/missred/32/14096_2.png) [@missred](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/missred)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2015, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-your-sister-in-laws-sister/716234/38 "2015-03-30T02:47:34Z")
My dad and his brother married sisters. In addition, two of my mother’s brothers married sisters. All lasted until death did they part. I have three double first cousins (cousins on both sides). ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2015, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-your-sister-in-laws-sister/716234/39 "2015-03-30T03:08:11Z")
I notice this thread is currently sequential-threaded with **Word for conflict seekers** ---
**Author:** ![Hershele\_Ostropoler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e47c2d/32.png) [@Hershele\_Ostropoler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hershele_Ostropoler)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2015, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-your-sister-in-laws-sister/716234/40 "2015-03-30T03:17:51Z")
> [@panache45](#): > > This, and more: My grandfather and his identical twin brother married my grandmother and her identical twin sister. And no, I don’t think they ever “switched”. Not by accident, at least. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-your-sister-in-laws-sister/716234.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dating-your-sister-in-laws-sister/716234.md?page=3)