# Dead man's tuna: a moral dilemma? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 16, 2002, 11:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dead-mans-tuna-a-moral-dilemma/103920 "2002-04-16T11:34:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![manwithaplan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f1d935/32.png) [@manwithaplan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/manwithaplan)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2002, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dead-mans-tuna-a-moral-dilemma/103920/41 "2002-04-19T14:14:03Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jjimm \* > **The wind continues to blow infernally** That’s fourteen month old tuna for ya. ---
**Author:** ![Abe\_Babe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3ab097/32.png) [@Abe\_Babe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Abe_Babe)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2002, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dead-mans-tuna-a-moral-dilemma/103920/42 "2002-04-19T14:48:34Z")
Quoth the tuna, “Nevermore.” ---
**Author:** ![Chef\_Troy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/85f322/32.png) [@Chef\_Troy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chef_Troy)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2002, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dead-mans-tuna-a-moral-dilemma/103920/43 "2002-04-19T15:41:16Z")
\*All dressed up with nothin’ to eat Tuna from a dead man (dead man, dead man) All dressed up with nothin’ to eat… Tuna from a dead man’s startin to look good WHYYYY not eat it? It’s only food… whooo! Hopin that the malnutrition will subside Goin’ to the pantry where tuna is inside Hopin that the malnutrition will subside Goin’ to the pantry where tuna is inside I was struck by hunger Walking down the hall He’s not going to eat this tuna, after all… It’s a dead man’s tuna Fancy Albacore There’s enough to last for days, and maybe even more WHYYYYY not eat it? it’s only food… DONNNNNN’T be afraid of botulism, dude WHYYYYY not eat it? it’s only food… DONNNNNN’T be afraid of botulism, dude\* ---
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2002, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dead-mans-tuna-a-moral-dilemma/103920/44 "2002-04-19T16:58:22Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Kabbal \* > \*\*What do you get if you eat a man’s tuna? \*\* [female voice] Jewelry! [/female voice] ---
**Author:** ![Motcha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f17d59/32.png) [@Motcha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Motcha)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2002, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dead-mans-tuna-a-moral-dilemma/103920/45 "2002-05-01T17:01:08Z")
Let me see if I get this straight: You are concerned about the dead guy who used to OWN the tuna, but not about the dead fish that used to BE that tuna? If you’re not afraid that the tuna will haunt you, why should you think the guy wll haunt you? He only took the fish bodies out of a store. The fish used to LIVE in there! By the way, I once had an affair with the ghost of a very beautiful woman. However, at the time, she didn’t know I was alive. ---
**Author:** ![MachV](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@MachV](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MachV)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2002, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dead-mans-tuna-a-moral-dilemma/103920/46 "2002-05-01T22:03:42Z")
Once upon a time my step mom’s deceased aunt’s husband died. Uncle Fred. Since her & my dad were his official caregivers, I inherited a couple of things from Uncle Fred after his passing. A collection of Time/Life books (never opened), about 6 pipes, an '81 Buick Century, and a chest of drawers. But wait! That’s not all! Inside the chest were an economy size bottle of TUMs antacid and a _really comfy pair of cotton boxers with “FRED” lovingly written on the inside waistband in black marker._ Of all that stuff after all these years, wanna guess which one thing I still have? 😃 Hey, I _said_ they were comfy! ---
**Author:** ![AK-Dave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/7cd45c/32.png) [@AK-Dave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AK-Dave)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2002, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dead-mans-tuna-a-moral-dilemma/103920/47 "2002-05-01T23:20:46Z")
I guess now that you ate all his tuna, you can look up to the sky and say: “So long and thanks for all the fish!” (My Virgin Post! Been lurking for over a year…) ---
**Author:** ![Princhester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Princhester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Princhester)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2002, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dead-mans-tuna-a-moral-dilemma/103920/48 "2002-05-02T04:50:26Z")
Yep, I’ll pay that one, **AK-Dave** ---
**Author:** ![Princhester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Princhester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Princhester)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2002, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dead-mans-tuna-a-moral-dilemma/103920/49 "2002-05-02T04:57:36Z")
Yep, I’ll pay that one, **AK-Dave** ---
**Author:** ![Motcha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f17d59/32.png) [@Motcha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Motcha)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2002, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dead-mans-tuna-a-moral-dilemma/103920/50 "2002-05-02T13:37:50Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by MachV \* > **about 6 pipes, an '81 Buick Century, and a chest of drawers.** Chest of drawers? How about a bit of pram? > [@](#): > > **…really comfy pair of cotton boxers with “FRED” lovingly written on the inside waistband in black marker.** So, you’re saying that there were drawers in the drawer? ---
**Author:** ![WavyDavy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/3da27b/32.png) [@WavyDavy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WavyDavy)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2002, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dead-mans-tuna-a-moral-dilemma/103920/51 "2002-05-02T14:08:15Z")
Lets see, if you had opened the tuna at the funeral, maybe everyone could have had a bite. Sometimes fish goes a long way. Throw in a loaf of bread… feed the masses. ---
**Author:** ![robertwa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e9a140/32.png) [@robertwa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robertwa)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2002, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dead-mans-tuna-a-moral-dilemma/103920/52 "2002-05-02T14:25:52Z")
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with using dead people’s stuff. I used my grandfather’s electric razor for years after he died. I never felt weird about it, except when I had to clean his hair out the first time. ---
**Author:** ![jmonster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/dbc845/32.png) [@jmonster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jmonster)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2002, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dead-mans-tuna-a-moral-dilemma/103920/53 "2002-05-02T20:30:39Z")
I used my dead grandmother’s Chloraseptic until it ran out. I felt kinda creepy, but my throat was really sore. ---
**Author:** ![Motcha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f17d59/32.png) [@Motcha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Motcha)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2002, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dead-mans-tuna-a-moral-dilemma/103920/54 "2002-05-02T20:41:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jmonster \* > \*\*I used my dead grandmother’s Chloraseptic until it ran out. I felt kinda creepy, but my throat was really sore. \*\* So you had the ghost of a frog in your throat? ---
**Author:** ![The\_Scrivener](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@The\_Scrivener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Scrivener)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2002, 4:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dead-mans-tuna-a-moral-dilemma/103920/55 "2002-05-03T04:18:33Z")
Lemme get this straight… you can’t afford lunch, but you had scruples about helping youself to a dead work colleague’s cans of tuna? It sounds as if your workplace isn’t paying you enough! Ask for a raise, and if you don’t get it, start stealing office supplies! Do you have access to the company’s ledgers, heh-heh, nudge-nudge? Here’s a great corporate revenue raiser: is there an executive washroom, lounge, or gym facility? Wire it! Sell the sicko footage to the Internet alt.porn sites! Even better, set up a live webcam feed from your computer at work! 😃 [neoMarxist rant]There is no such thing as a free lunch for Joe Lunchbucket, unless his mother bought and packed it for him. No, seriously, there is no such thing as a free lunch unless you’re a business executive-type who can expense it and write it off. Everyone else, who is making only a tiny fraction of what the Grand Poobahs make, has to pay for theirs…[/neoMarxist rant] [Groucho Marx] Wage Slaves, throw off your chains! What do you have to lose? Wages![/Marx] Here’s to all the tuna-eaters [Groucho hikes his eyebrows] out there. And here’s to the meek inheiriting the earth, preferably after Congress completely guts the capital gains tax. (What we need here is a “Groucho” smilie!) ---
**Author:** ![Terrorcotta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dbc845/32.png) [@Terrorcotta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terrorcotta)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2002, 12:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dead-mans-tuna-a-moral-dilemma/103920/56 "2002-05-03T12:30:52Z")
I used my dead grandmother’s ancient Bakelite vibrator until the frayed wires shorted out and sprayed molten copper all over my ah, leg. ---
**Author:** ![Cheesesteak](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cheesesteak/32/3694_2.png) [@Cheesesteak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheesesteak)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2002, 12:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dead-mans-tuna-a-moral-dilemma/103920/57 "2002-05-03T12:33:15Z")
That is one of the most disturbing images I’ve had in quite some time… ---
**Author:** ![Arken](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dfb087/32.png) [@Arken](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arken)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2002, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dead-mans-tuna-a-moral-dilemma/103920/58 "2002-05-03T13:03:13Z")
We secretly switched **jjimm’s** tuna with canned dead man! Let’s see if he notices the difference… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dead-mans-tuna-a-moral-dilemma/103920.md?page=2)