# Deaf people don't understand how to adopt cats **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 23, 2003, 12:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deaf-people-dont-understand-how-to-adopt-cats/203296 "2003-09-23T12:25:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Francesca](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/9fc348/32.png) [@Francesca](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Francesca)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 12:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deaf-people-dont-understand-how-to-adopt-cats/203296/1 "2003-09-23T12:25:01Z")
Background: my parents are both profoundly deaf and have been all their lives. They have both worked all their lives, raised a child (that would be me), and travelled the world. They are intelligent human beings. We’re getting a cat. I visited the animal rescue centre yesterday and picked out a cat. He’s lovely. He couldn’t come home with us straight away because they need to interview all members of the household and my mother couldn’t come with us yesterday. But they’ve met me, and they’ve met my father, and they assured us that if my mother and father went today they could pick up the cat. I got a phone call from them today _while my parents were there_, saying that they couldn’t take the cat home because my parents didn’t understand what they were saying. They humiliated my parents by calling their daughter and saying “Sorry, your parents don’t understand.” I’m left wondering how on earth my parents have managed to live full and productive lives while not being able to understand hearing people. It must come as a terrible shock to realise that because you’re deaf, you can’t possibly understand what’s going on. I asked them if they had a pen and paper and was told “Oh, it’s too much to write down”. Too much to write down? Do you give all prospective rehomers a verbal manual? Here’s what it is: _You can’t be fucking bothered to make the effort._ You can’t be bothered to go the extra mile and be patient with my parents. Because you’re scared, or apathetic, you’ve decided that they need a hearing person to help them. They don’t need my help. They do understand how to rehome a cat, for fucks sake. It’s you that has the problem, not them. And now I have to take the afternoon off work and go down them tomorrow. For them to stand there, looking like spare wheels while you talk to me and ignore them. Well, it’s not going to happen. I’ll go with them, but I’m going to insist you talk directly to them. It’s not hard. They lipread. They will understand you and I will stand by while you are embarressed into actually making an effort to communicate. I got an email from my dad when he got home. He’s up for that too. I’m used to people assuming that because they’re deaf, they’re stupid. But rarely have they been so humiliated. ---
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 12:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deaf-people-dont-understand-how-to-adopt-cats/203296/2 "2003-09-23T12:28:38Z")
**Francesca** , that sucks! I know there are small-minded people in the world, but you wouldn’t necessarily expect to find them staffing the animal shelter.:rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Tansu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/67e7ee/32.png) [@Tansu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tansu)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deaf-people-dont-understand-how-to-adopt-cats/203296/3 "2003-09-23T12:59:27Z")
I hope you embarrass the hell out of the silly people at the animal shelter. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 1:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deaf-people-dont-understand-how-to-adopt-cats/203296/4 "2003-09-23T13:14:30Z")
Jobsworths. ---
**Author:** ![whiterabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/cab0a1/32.png) [@whiterabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whiterabbit)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 1:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deaf-people-dont-understand-how-to-adopt-cats/203296/5 "2003-09-23T13:14:30Z")
Go, **Francesca** and [b/Francesca’s Parents!\*\* Unfortunately, I completely believe this. Some people can be remarkably stupid. I’d be okay if they’d made a real effort and everybody STILL had problems (hearing people can have communication problems too, after all, if nothing else the old “I said one thing but she heard another”) – but to not even try is just lazy. Idiots. ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_Wright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@Steve\_Wright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_Wright)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deaf-people-dont-understand-how-to-adopt-cats/203296/6 "2003-09-23T13:16:33Z")
Go over there and sort them out. And pick up the cat, who clearly needs a good home, ASAP. ---
**Author:** ![whiterabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/cab0a1/32.png) [@whiterabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whiterabbit)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deaf-people-dont-understand-how-to-adopt-cats/203296/7 "2003-09-23T13:16:41Z")
And then I go and screw up my coding. That’s how pissed I am at those people, I guess. ---
**Author:** ![cowgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8c91f0/32.png) [@cowgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cowgirl)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deaf-people-dont-understand-how-to-adopt-cats/203296/8 "2003-09-23T13:19:04Z")
Assholes. I’m assuming (hoping?) that this was an exceptional event, and usually they get treated like human beings … right ? Embarass them for me too @ ---
**Author:** ![Elenfair](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/cc9497/32.png) [@Elenfair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elenfair)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 1:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deaf-people-dont-understand-how-to-adopt-cats/203296/9 "2003-09-23T13:25:14Z")
GAH. That drives me bananas. :mad: GO GET 'EM, FRANNIE. I’d get your mom and dad to pen a NASTY letter to them, quoting as many sources as they can regarding being deaf… n’… STUFF! GAH. ---
**Author:** ![Francesca](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/9fc348/32.png) [@Francesca](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Francesca)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 1:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deaf-people-dont-understand-how-to-adopt-cats/203296/10 "2003-09-23T13:25:56Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by cowgirl \* > \*\* I’m assuming (hoping?) that this was an exceptional event, and usually they get treated like human beings … right ? \*\* Most people make an effort and generally it’s fine, but we’ve had prejudice worse than this. I’ve been asked if they’re retarded. Waiters in restaurants ask me what they want to eat. People talk to me and ignore them all the time. Generally, I refuse to play along - my standard answer is “I don’t know. Ask them.” This one just annoyed me because of the way she said “Oh, it’s too much to write down.” This wasn’t just prejudice, it was laziness. And because of it, my parents were humiliated more than usual and I have to take time off work. ---
**Author:** ![yojimbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yojimbo/32/232_2.png) [@yojimbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yojimbo)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deaf-people-dont-understand-how-to-adopt-cats/203296/11 "2003-09-23T14:00:32Z")
What a pack of lazy dicks. Your parents didn’t have much problems understanding me when I met them. Sorry they have to deal with this kind of shite :mad: Enjoy the cat ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deaf-people-dont-understand-how-to-adopt-cats/203296/12 "2003-09-23T14:05:08Z")
Just a suggestion, but if you please, you might have the following conversation with the “dear people” at the shelter: _Doesn’t the United Kingdom have these nifty things (let’s call them laws) one particular group (let’s call them Parliament) has decided (let’s call that legislated) you must follow (let’s call that abide by) which Parliament obviously didn’t think was too much trouble to write down (let’s call that publish)? Aren’t you folks, even at this shelter, subject to the law?_ Let me know how it goes if you do. And I think the cat’s mighty lucky to be going to a fine home. ---
**Author:** ![Briny\_Deep](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/briny_deep/32/17188_2.png) [@Briny\_Deep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Briny_Deep)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deaf-people-dont-understand-how-to-adopt-cats/203296/13 "2003-09-23T14:09:50Z")
You go! I’d love to be a fly on the wall while you force those silly people to (gasp) actually interact with a deaf person. Be sure to let the Executive Director of the shelter, or whatever it is they have, know how badly their staff initially handled this. ---
**Author:** ![irishgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/8edcca/32.png) [@irishgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/irishgirl)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deaf-people-dont-understand-how-to-adopt-cats/203296/14 "2003-09-23T14:17:43Z")
Stupid lazy woman. Can’t believe she’d be so ignorant and rude to people willing to take one of her charges. Why doesn’t the shelter have a written fact sheet with all the important info on it? Not everyone can remember a list of verbal instructions, it would be common sense to have them written down. Ask her to refund your pay for the 1/2 day off work…that’ll learn her. ---
**Author:** ![vanilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f19dbf/32.png) [@vanilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vanilla)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deaf-people-dont-understand-how-to-adopt-cats/203296/15 "2003-09-23T14:21:14Z")
After they are done “explaining”, sign to your parents that the pound people are “cats butts”. They will wonder why the laughter for no reason. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![kabbes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e99b99/32.png) [@kabbes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kabbes)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deaf-people-dont-understand-how-to-adopt-cats/203296/16 "2003-09-23T14:21:46Z")
Unbe-smegging-lievable. You should charge the woman at the shelter for the use of your time as an “interpreter”. Not an interpreter to the deaf, you understand. No, an interpreter to the _lazy_. :rolleyes: pan ---
**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deaf-people-dont-understand-how-to-adopt-cats/203296/17 "2003-09-23T14:45:21Z")
Oh, Frannie, that’s horrid. Be snide and horrid to them tomorrow. ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deaf-people-dont-understand-how-to-adopt-cats/203296/18 "2003-09-23T17:14:31Z")
Go **Frannie** , it’s your birthday… I remember when I was dating a deaf guy and everyone used to ask me, “How do you say hello?” Waving at them usually suffices. :rolleyes: People get so stupid when challenged (although, thankfully, William and I both used to laugh about it, because sometimes - not in the shelter worker’s case, of course, but sometimes - it’s human nature). Esprix ---
**Author:** ![sylphishone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@sylphishone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sylphishone)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deaf-people-dont-understand-how-to-adopt-cats/203296/19 "2003-09-23T18:50:39Z")
No, I have a great idea! When you go down tomorrow, make them get the cats before they start explaining everything. Tell them the cats are actually going to be “Hearing Ear” cats and are going to be working animals for your parents. Make them explain everything to the cats and pretend like your parents are communicating with the cats after the whole thing is done. It is a ridiculous idea but the people are being assinine so coming up with an equally assinine idea might do the trick. ---
**Author:** ![Tortuga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c4cdca/32.png) [@Tortuga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tortuga)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deaf-people-dont-understand-how-to-adopt-cats/203296/20 "2003-09-23T21:35:02Z")
I love the idea of “Hearing Ear Cats.” “Oh no! The cat just scratched me and sprayed the wall–that means there are weasels in the attic who’ve stolen the microwave and are cooking potatoes _wrapped in tinfoil_! Oh the humanity!” [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deaf-people-dont-understand-how-to-adopt-cats/203296.md?page=2)