# Dear Alabama voters: way to go, you chuckleheads. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 10, 2003, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-alabama-voters-way-to-go-you-chuckleheads/200694 "2003-09-10T05:11:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-alabama-voters-way-to-go-you-chuckleheads/200694/21 "2003-09-10T22:19:21Z")
It’s not an Alabama-only term, and it means the practice of hiding appropriations within another department’s appropriations for the purpose of hiding where it’s going. It has been hstorically used to fund pet projects in congressional districts. ---
**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2003, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-alabama-voters-way-to-go-you-chuckleheads/200694/22 "2003-09-10T23:16:15Z")
And for the record, my take on the “may” versus “will” debate is that it’s standard language meant to say that we’re not going to break the bank on the scholarships, and that, if we’re in a huge money bind, we shouldn’t have to make them a required priority on the order of, say, paying into the Education General Fund. Because they’re not. Your next questions, of course, will ask who determines what a money crunch is, where the threshold is, etc…to which I say, eh, whatever. No language is 100% binding. I can shoot holes through absolutely any legislative language, up to and including, “Murder is a crime.” This state does not change. It will always be a little pocket of the Third World tucked charmingly into the heart of the United States, a rotten, regressive, reactionary little tumor. I’ve loved and defended this place for years, but God, am I ever losing my will to fight. ---
**Author:** ![Soup\_du\_jour](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@Soup\_du\_jour](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soup_du_jour)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-alabama-voters-way-to-go-you-chuckleheads/200694/23 "2003-09-11T00:48:23Z")
I read about this deal in the Washington Post earlier today. I was appalled as you are, **Ogre**. Well, perhaps not, seeing as I don’t have to deal with it. I _do_, however, have to deal with ANOTHER Special Session for Redistricting in my home state of Texas, but that’s a rant for another time. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Carter_of_Mars)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-alabama-voters-way-to-go-you-chuckleheads/200694/24 "2003-09-11T01:02:21Z")
I was concerned enough about this bill to actually _read_ some of those 600 pages before I voted. Here was my take: If you own anything, are going to sell anything, or intend to spend any money, vote NO! Otherwise, you’re ok with a yes vote. He needed ± 650 million, and asked for 1.3 billion, with that figure likely to increase drastically if the economy improves. We were asked to trust the set-up that got us into this mess with an additional 1.3 billion. Like they’re gonna’ change spots and do the right thing in the future? Timber companies and private landowners get hit with a huge tax hike, while one of the largest (if not the largest) timber interest in the state, Alabama Power Company, gets a tax break written into the law? (42% of what others would have paid) I’ll be willing to pay more taxes when I can see an equitable plan that doesn’t seem to be more of the same ol’ same ol’, except on a grander scale. And no, in the case of the scholarship funding “authorized to” does not mean “shall.” **Ogre** , my good SDMB friend, I’m afraid we’ll have to agree to disagree on this one. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-alabama-voters-way-to-go-you-chuckleheads/200694/25 "2003-09-11T01:09:48Z")
Crackers are dumber than peckerwoods. ---
**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-alabama-voters-way-to-go-you-chuckleheads/200694/26 "2003-09-11T01:14:29Z")
> [@](#): > > while one of the largest (if not the largest) timber interest in the state, Alabama Power Company, gets a tax break written into the law? Yeah, because unlike a tax increase on International Paper, a tax hike on Alabama Power serves no purpose at all except to raise power rates within the state. > [@](#): > > And no, in the case of the scholarship funding “authorized to” does not mean “shall.” I’m not saying to abandon your distrust. I’m just saying that “may” also means “is now allowed to,” and doesn’t necessarily follow with the implicit rider “or, hell, may not.” And what the hell was that all about, **elucidator**? ---
**Author:** ![John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Carter_of_Mars)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-alabama-voters-way-to-go-you-chuckleheads/200694/27 "2003-09-11T01:22:21Z")
“And what the hell was that all about, elucidator?” Elucidator is either a peckerwood, or not entirely lucid, or both. “Yeah, because unlike a tax increase on International Paper, a tax hike on Alabama Power serves no purpose at all except to raise power rates within the state.” And adding a tax on “service” won’t have the same effect? A regressive tax that hits the poorest the hardest? There were some good things and some bad things in this proposal. IMHO, the bad far outweighed the good. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-alabama-voters-way-to-go-you-chuckleheads/200694/28 "2003-09-11T01:22:26Z")
Oh, I’m a peckerwood, thought you knew. Born in Waco, TX. Quiet little town. You never heard of it, nothing ever happens there. Athens on the Brazos, its sometimes called. Seeking to console **Soup** , what appears to be another recovering Texan. We’re peckerwoods. Thank God we ain’t _crackers_. Crackers are dumb. RE: the OP _QED_ ---
**Author:** ![John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Carter_of_Mars)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-alabama-voters-way-to-go-you-chuckleheads/200694/29 "2003-09-11T01:32:02Z")
Athens on the Brazos…Long time since I heard that one. Had a cousin went to Baylor once to be a cheerleader. She fell in love with a Texas Aggie from Sing-Sing on the Brazos. Got married, had a bunch of peckerwoods down around Corpus. Damn if y’all ain’t proud of that little piss-stream you call a river. In Alabama, we’d call that one a creek branch. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-alabama-voters-way-to-go-you-chuckleheads/200694/30 "2003-09-11T02:01:57Z")
Still, ya’ll are dumber. Dumber than peckerwoods. Who does that leave you to look down on? Roadkill? ---
**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-alabama-voters-way-to-go-you-chuckleheads/200694/31 "2003-09-11T02:46:29Z")
Dumb enough to misspell “y’all?” 🙂 Nyah, nyah, nyah! ---
**Author:** ![John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Carter_of_Mars)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-alabama-voters-way-to-go-you-chuckleheads/200694/32 "2003-09-11T02:50:10Z")
“There’s no place that I’d rather be than right here With my red neck, white socks and Blue Ribbon beer” 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Soup\_du\_jour](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@Soup\_du\_jour](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soup_du_jour)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-alabama-voters-way-to-go-you-chuckleheads/200694/33 "2003-09-11T05:26:39Z")
**elucidator** , I’m not a recovering Texan. I’m a Texan at a Washington, DC college! I have a Texas flag hanging on my bedroom door, you nincompoop. 🙂 [sub]I love Texas.[/sub] Oh, and Waco is known for three things. 1. Baylor 2. Branch Davidians 3. Dr Pepper ---
**Author:** ![thatDDperson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/9de0a6/32.png) [@thatDDperson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thatDDperson)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 6:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-alabama-voters-way-to-go-you-chuckleheads/200694/34 "2003-09-11T06:52:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Ogre \* > \*\*Dumb enough to misspell “y’all?” 🙂 > > Nyah, nyah, nyah! \*\* Ogre…Ya’ll and y’all are two different Texanisms. In the less educated states (like Alabama–and I know whereof I speak, as the late spouse taught at Texas Tech and the University of Alabama) you may use the term interchangably, but any Texan knows that “y’all” is you all and “ya’ll” is ALL of y’all. It’s a more inclusive term, used in this case to include ALL y’all folks in Ala-damnGITdown-bama.😃 ---
**Author:** ![Milum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ea666f/32.png) [@Milum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Milum)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 10:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-alabama-voters-way-to-go-you-chuckleheads/200694/35 "2003-09-11T10:17:23Z")
**Orge: I gotta get out of this goddamned hellhole.** See, its a brain drain. Kids like Orge come to Alabama to get a proper education and when they graduate they want to leave. Good-bye Orge, best of luck, go wash out your mouth with soap and come back when you have matured and acquired some walk-around-sense and decent manners . And take heart, you will. **atticus: We in North Carolina are very thankful for Alabama and Mississippi, who collectively guarantee we will never ever be in 50th place among the states in any measure of educational attainment…** Uh… **atticus** , its best that you keep current… **State Average ACT Test Scores 2003** Alabama\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ 20.3 North Carolina\_\_\_\_\_ 20.1 \*\* Ogre: … Pork was outlawed by the bill. Pet projects could no longer be funded through state money.\*\* Well slap my knee **Orge** , why didn’t you say so. Way back in nineteen ought three we outlawed car stealing in Alabama and a car ain’t been stole since. **thatDDperson:… but any Texan knows that “y’all” is you all and “ya’ll” is ALL of y’all. It’s a more inclusive term, used in this case to include ALL y’all folks in Ala-damnGITdown-bama.** Being ever mindful that current trends are slow in filtering down to Texas let me whisper this so as not to embarrass… \*\* There is no apostrophe in “yall”.\*\* The term has transmuted through intense usage into a single word and the use of a apostrophe is now considered gauche. \*\*John Carter of Mars: “There’s no place that I’d rather be than right here With my red neck, white socks and Blue Ribbon beer” \*\* Hey\*\* John Carter of Mars\*\*, I think I know you! Are you related to the Willie John Carters of Remlap, Alabama? He married one of the Wilson girls from Tuscaloosa. My, my, small world. Anyway, I much appreciate your sentiments. Most of the other people writing on this thread just can’t imagine how embarrassing it is to wake up one fine morning and find out that your newly elected Governor is a transvestite. So now that his tax scheme has been overwhelmingly rejected by the good people of Alabama I hope Miss Bob Riley will now go back into the closet and then re-emerge wearing clothing fitting the manly fiscally-responsible republican conservative that we elected last year. Alabama is but a poor backward state, we don’t yet have the modern legal process of recall, we only have tar and feathers and rails. So watch your step Governor Riley, the people are watching. ---
**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 11:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-alabama-voters-way-to-go-you-chuckleheads/200694/36 "2003-09-11T11:10:52Z")
> [@](#): > > Orge: I gotta get out of this goddamned hellhole. > > See, its a brain drain. Kids like Orge come to Alabama to get a proper education and when they graduate they want to leave. > Good-bye Orge, best of luck, go wash out your mouth with soap and come back when you have matured and acquired some walk-around-sense and decent manners . And take heart, you will. Ah, the internet. when you have a Global Village, it breeds Global Village Idiots. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 11:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-alabama-voters-way-to-go-you-chuckleheads/200694/37 "2003-09-11T11:57:17Z")
It takes a village to raise the idiot. ---
**Author:** ![Nocturne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/9fc348/32.png) [@Nocturne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nocturne)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 12:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-alabama-voters-way-to-go-you-chuckleheads/200694/38 "2003-09-11T12:34:17Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by milum_ > > See, its a brain drain. Kids like Orge come to Alabama to get a proper education and when they graduate they want to leave. Really? I’ve been in Alabama all my life and I haven’t seen that wonderful education system yet. I had to teach myself math in high school, and so did all my classmates. Don’t even get me started on how math is taught here at the University of Alabama. That’s assuming I haven’t been whooshed. ---
**Author:** ![LonesomePolecat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a88e57/32.png) [@LonesomePolecat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LonesomePolecat)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 12:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-alabama-voters-way-to-go-you-chuckleheads/200694/39 "2003-09-11T12:36:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by elucidator \* > \*\*Crackers are dumb. RE: the OP _QED_ \*\* You’re a bigot. ---
**Author:** ![atticus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/cdc98d/32.png) [@atticus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/atticus)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-alabama-voters-way-to-go-you-chuckleheads/200694/40 "2003-09-11T13:42:00Z")
> [@](#): > > State Average ACT Test Scores 2003 > Alabama\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ 20.3 > North Carolina\_\_\_\_\_ 20.1 Source? First, I’m wondering how you can have the 2003 ACT Test scores, when 2003 isn’t over. Second, the SAT is by far the overwhelming choice for HS Seniors in NC. Folks taking the ACT are the ones applying to elite private schools. If that is the case in Alabama, you are comparing college bound elites…hardly a relevant measure of overall educational attainment. More meaningful to me are statistics such as the National Assessment of Educational Progress, [here](http://nces.ed.gov/nationsreportcard/states/profile.asp) which shows that NC was above national averages for reading and math at grades 4 and 8, while Alabama was below national averages for those categories. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-alabama-voters-way-to-go-you-chuckleheads/200694.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-alabama-voters-way-to-go-you-chuckleheads/200694.md?page=3)