# Dear Attractive Married Women: Plz Wear A Ring. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 17, 2012, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-attractive-married-women-plz-wear-a-ring/641336 "2012-11-17T19:13:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 10
**Author:** ![Belowjob2.0](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Belowjob2.0](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Belowjob2.0)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-attractive-married-women-plz-wear-a-ring/641336/181 "2012-11-19T01:32:17Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > You’ve had some marvelous life experiences, haven’t you? :rolleyes: It would have been better if I never found out, at the ripe old age of 13, that some of my married teachers and baseball moms were down to fuck. I was a big kid, already a light heavyweight, so they weren’t so much pedophiles as lacking judgement and self-restraint. I did judge them, then. Kids prefer a simple universe, not one with gray areas where the moral failings of adults are plain to see. I don’t judge them, now. They just are who they are. But I don’t have any illusions either. At some point, you have to stop looking at Broadwell, Nowak, and the scores of high school teachers as exceptions, and just accept the fact that this is what a lot of women do. Including several women that I work with. The “all women are whores” was a quote from Giraffe. I never called anyone a whore. What I did say was that the right man with the right plan can talk a married woman into anything. If you’re not the right man, or you don’t have the right plan, you’re wasting your time. Ring or no ring, this basic fact does not change. ---
**Author:** ![Blackberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecd19e/32.png) [@Blackberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackberry)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-attractive-married-women-plz-wear-a-ring/641336/182 "2012-11-19T01:35:32Z")
> [@curlcoat](#): > > This is an enlightening thread. Men actually ask women out that they have only just met? And those women go out with them? In this day and age? Huh. How exactly do you think clubs work? ---
**Author:** ![Belowjob2.0](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Belowjob2.0](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Belowjob2.0)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-attractive-married-women-plz-wear-a-ring/641336/183 "2012-11-19T01:36:18Z")
> [@Broomstick](#): > > The problem isn’t women who want to “sweat up the bedsheets with a charming stranger”. We all know they exist and can probably name a few. The problem comes in with assuming ALL women are like that, and if they don’t put out for the “charming stranger” they’re bitches and cock-teases. > > Men who want casual sex should seek out women who also want casual sex. If they find out a woman isn’t interested in what they’re interested in they should move on and not act butt-hurt about it. \*Men who want casual sex should seek out women who also want casual sex. If they find out a woman isn’t interested in what they’re interested in they should move on and not act butt-hurt about it \* Absolutely. Nothing is less attractive than acting butt-hurt about a rejection. ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-attractive-married-women-plz-wear-a-ring/641336/184 "2012-11-19T02:09:46Z")
> [@Troppus](#): > > RickJay, this thread passed you up by halfway down page one. It’s not been about you for quite awhile. We’ve just been ragging on clueless guys in general who hit on us blind then get butthurt about rejection. :dubious: For someone who hasn’t been talking about the OP, you sure mention him a lot. > [@Troppus](#): > > This. But if **the OP** intends to pursue, grow, and maintain a friendship with this awesome woman in spite of the fact that he won’t get in her pants, I’ll happily apologize for jumping to the conclusion that he dropped her like a hot rock as soon as he discovered her vagina is off limits. > [@Troppus](#): > > Have you read the whole thread? **(1) guy asks out girl he finds attractive, gripes because she wore no proof of marriage** (2) handful of women give him shit for not trying to get to know her a bit before pouncing (3) handful of men call bullshit and claim guy Did try to get to know her (4) I said "prove you’re interested in more than her vagina, make friends with her (5) men push back and say well no, why should we pretend we are interested in anything but women’s vaginas? > [@Troppus](#): > > Ok, I’m the awesome chick **in the OP** , let’s stage a reenactment. > > Banter ensues. > **RJ** : Hey, you’re fun. Let’s go out. > Me: Can’t, I’m married. > **RJ** : You should wear a wedding ring so guys like me don’t get all butthurt. > Me: I don’t wear a ring because of reasons. We can still be friends though, right? > **RJ** : No, I was hoping to sleep with you. I’m no longer interested in your interestingness since vagina is out of the picture. > Me: Well then, since you don’t actually care about anything other than my vagina, I don’t care if you are embarrassed by my rejection. Get lost, horndog. > > Aand…scene. > [@Troppus](#): > > I don’t think **the OP** is a pig at all, but I don’t have any sympathy for his predicament. He didn’t actually spend much time getting to know her, so it’s entirely his fault he experienced rejection. I’m not wearing a ring just to protect the feelings of strangers who might come on to me. It’s not a big deal, but the poor single me/friend zone/ darn these women and their confusing ignals whiny nonsense is a little overplayed. > [@Troppus](#): > > Best advice in the thread. Way to go, Giraffe. **Hear that, OP?** Man up and handle that rejection like a boss. Players don’t whine. > [@Troppus](#): > > Now goddamn it, dial it back, **RickJay**. I said I had no sympathy for some dunderhead who pisses and moans over a (perceived) rejection. Get back out there and find yourself a woman, caveman, and maybe employ a little more finesse next time if you are sensitive or grow a pair and handle rejection like a man. I gotta warn ya, the absence of a wedding ring will never guarantee a date, and the presence of a ring won’t guarantee a rejection, either. ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-attractive-married-women-plz-wear-a-ring/641336/185 "2012-11-19T02:11:26Z")
> [@Ibanez](#): > > I can’t speak for him, but I’m pretty sure he didn’t beat her, whip his dick out and shove it down her throat Or if he did, he didn’t post it online ☹ (This is a joke. A fucking joke (no pun intended), put down those pitch forks.) ---
**Author:** ![R3d\_Anonymous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/aeb1de/32.png) [@R3d\_Anonymous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/R3d_Anonymous)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-attractive-married-women-plz-wear-a-ring/641336/186 "2012-11-19T02:16:53Z")
> [@Giraffe](#): > > :dubious: > > For someone who hasn’t been talking about the OP, you sure mention him a lot. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-attractive-married-women-plz-wear-a-ring/641336/187 "2012-11-19T02:18:17Z")
> [@Faruiza](#): > > That is a “vajacancy”. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Meyer6](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cc9497/32.png) [@Meyer6](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meyer6)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 2:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-attractive-married-women-plz-wear-a-ring/641336/188 "2012-11-19T02:22:53Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > This OP really does boil down to a guy feeling disappointed that a woman he thought was cute and nice is taken. He didn’t ask her out, he just dug her, and then refrained from asking her out upon learning she was married. What, praytell, is so wrong about this? I think the primary problem is an inability to distinguish between ‘man who is slightly disappointed’ and ‘man who is utterly butthurt’. Apparently there is no middle ground at all, and any man who even thinks about asking a woman out is just a misogynistic asshole who thinks that he is owed sex by all those dirty cockteases he meets at the mall. After all, it’s not like you ever hear a woman lament over meeting a nice guy and then finding out that he has a girlfriend. ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-attractive-married-women-plz-wear-a-ring/641336/189 "2012-11-19T02:27:25Z")
> [@Troppus](#): > > It’s like fishing: the fisherman thinks it’s a contest, but the fish is just doing her thing, minding her own business and oblivious to the bait-dangler. The difference between fish and women: women _know_ it’s a contest, and they’re playing by different rules. ---
**Author:** ![Troppus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a587f6/32.png) [@Troppus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troppus)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-attractive-married-women-plz-wear-a-ring/641336/190 "2012-11-19T02:44:33Z")
> [@Beware\_of\_Doug](#): > > The difference between fish and women: women _know_ it’s a contest, and they’re playing by different rules. Aw hellll no, I’m not coming back in this sinking thread for this one. Some women might be trolling for attention. Not all. Some men who hit on strange women might be obnoxious cavemen, some might be genuinely nice guys. Sorry for dissing you, OP, but Doug pulled the Leopard print panties card so Ima fold. ---
**Author:** ![Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sleeps_With_Butterflies)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-attractive-married-women-plz-wear-a-ring/641336/191 "2012-11-19T03:15:38Z")
> [@Beware\_of\_Doug](#): > > The difference between fish and women: women _know_ it’s a contest, and they’re playing by different rules. Ha! I hope this is you being funny and not your general attitude. Because if it is, yikes! Yes, yes we horrible wimmenz are playing our game everywhere we go in hopes some foolish man will come cast his line for us while we are at the grocery store, the gas station, the bank, the mall, a parking lot, the dry cleaner, etc. To hell with wanting to go out and get things done, we are really out just to play our game with our different rules. Man, that’s the best part of being a woman! ---
**Author:** ![curlcoat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea5d25/32.png) [@curlcoat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/curlcoat)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-attractive-married-women-plz-wear-a-ring/641336/192 "2012-11-19T03:32:15Z")
> [@Blackberry](#): > > How exactly do you think clubs work? I’m not sure I’ve ever been to one. Is this the same thing as, say, a sports bar? Or a bar attached to a restaurant? ---
**Author:** ![Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f475e1/32.png) [@Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jimmy_Chitwood)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-attractive-married-women-plz-wear-a-ring/641336/193 "2012-11-19T03:35:04Z")
Only if it’s a seafood restaurant. ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-attractive-married-women-plz-wear-a-ring/641336/194 "2012-11-19T03:40:59Z")
> [@Belowjob2.0](#): > > What I did say was that the right man with the right plan can talk a married woman into anything. If you’re not the right man, or you don’t have the right plan, you’re wasting your time. Ring or no ring, this basic fact does not change. :rolleyes: Right, it’s inconceivable that a woman might actually remain loyal to her partner. It only takes a man knowing the right combination of words/actions to make her drop her panties. Newsflash: women aren’t vending machines. You don’t push a combination of buttons to get a set result. ---
**Author:** ![RaftPeople](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/6f9a4e/32.png) [@RaftPeople](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RaftPeople)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-attractive-married-women-plz-wear-a-ring/641336/195 "2012-11-19T03:43:22Z")
> [@Broomstick](#): > > The problem isn’t women who want to “sweat up the bedsheets with a charming stranger”. We all know they exist and can probably name a few. The problem comes in with assuming ALL women are like that, and if they don’t put out for the “charming stranger” they’re bitches and cock-teases. Why is that “the” problem? ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-attractive-married-women-plz-wear-a-ring/641336/196 "2012-11-19T03:44:36Z")
> [@Troppus](#): > > Jesus, do you have any friends of the opposite sex, or just the one you’re boinking? What I’m suggesting is that if he truly tried to get to know her before attempting to pick her up and found her so appealing and this interest is not limited to whether or not she’ll get in his bed, then he’s totally made an awesome new friend. What you are suggesting is gross and creepy as hell. I’m pretty sure **Giraffe** isn’t Jesus. He does have disciples, though. 😃 > [@Muffin](#): > > In a 179 post thread, I figure your little OP might have got 15 replies. The rest just sort of fell out of the sky and landed in the thread. Yup. Weirdest frigging thread we’ve had in quite a while. Weird. ---
**Author:** ![curlcoat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea5d25/32.png) [@curlcoat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/curlcoat)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-attractive-married-women-plz-wear-a-ring/641336/197 "2012-11-19T03:47:22Z")
> [@Jimmy\_Chitwood](#): > > Only if it’s a seafood restaurant. Single people are into fish? :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![ZebraShaSha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/eada6e/32.png) [@ZebraShaSha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZebraShaSha)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-attractive-married-women-plz-wear-a-ring/641336/198 "2012-11-19T03:54:21Z")
> [@Broomstick](#): > > :rolleyes: > > Right, it’s inconceivable that a woman might actually remain loyal to her partner. It only takes a man knowing the right combination of words/actions to make her drop her panties. Newsflash: women aren’t vending machines. You don’t push a combination of buttons to get a set result. Yea, right. Next you’re going to tell me that isn’t a coin-slot, either. ---
**Author:** ![Belowjob2.0](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Belowjob2.0](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Belowjob2.0)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-attractive-married-women-plz-wear-a-ring/641336/199 "2012-11-19T04:10:49Z")
> [@Broomstick](#): > > :rolleyes: > > Right, it’s inconceivable that a woman might actually remain loyal to her partner. It only takes a man knowing the right combination of words/actions to make her drop her panties. Newsflash: women aren’t vending machines. You don’t push a combination of buttons to get a set result. Number one, it has to be the right man, as I said. Just any random guy can’t pull it off. The vast majority of men couldn’t have flipped Broadwell. Petraeus was the right man. Number two, the right plan is not like pushing buttons on a vending machine. It’s like writing a subroutine for an expert system, and then executing it, in real time. Inconceivable? No. Just unlikely, when the married woman in question is faced with a highly desirable man who’s making the right play for her affections. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2012, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-attractive-married-women-plz-wear-a-ring/641336/200 "2012-11-19T04:24:40Z")
> [@Broomstick](#): > > :. Newsflash: women aren’t vending machines. You don’t push a combination of buttons to get a set result. Damn it. I pressed A13 and just got some Funions. I meant to press B13 and get some willing vagina. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-attractive-married-women-plz-wear-a-ring/641336.md?page=9) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-attractive-married-women-plz-wear-a-ring/641336.md?page=11)