# Dear Bibliophage..
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-bibliophage/96124
**Category:** The BBQ Pit
**Created:** [November 30, 2001, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-bibliophage/96124 "2001-11-30T14:46:04Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@The\_Great\_Gazoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Great_Gazoo)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2001, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-bibliophage/96124/1 "2001-11-30T14:46:04Z")
You’re right. I learned my lesson. So long, asshole.
---
### Author:  [@Gary\_Kumquat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Kumquat)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2001, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-bibliophage/96124/2 "2001-11-30T14:49:41Z")
Let me guess:
[http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=101602](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=101602)
Is that it?
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### Author:  [@LiquidLobotomy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LiquidLobotomy)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2001, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-bibliophage/96124/3 "2001-11-30T14:50:10Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by The Great Gazoo \*
> \*\*You’re right. I learned my lesson. So long, asshole. \*\*
Hmmm, goodness I never knew pumpkin pie was so hard to make! I thought you just used the pumpkin fillings and threw them into a blender and just hit “liquify”. I guess not though!
Oh and thank you so much for your kind words about Nanna. I know she’s old and starting to lose it, but you didn’t have to stand up and toast her like that. It was just a family reunion. That was really touching of you.
You’ll be interested to know that I finally found a pair of socks to match those green slacks I got last Christmas. So now I have no excuse not to wear them every once and a while.
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### Author:  [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2001, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-bibliophage/96124/4 "2001-11-30T15:08:58Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by LiquidLobotomy \*
> \*\*
>
> > [@](#):
> >
> > \*Originally posted by The Great Gazoo \*
> > \*\*You’re right. I learned my lesson. So long, asshole. \*\*
>
> Hmmm, goodness I never knew pumpkin pie was so hard to make! I thought you just used the pumpkin fillings and threw them into a blender and just hit “liquify”. I guess not though! \*\*
Of course it’s not that easy. First, you never use “liquify”! You use “Frappe!” mainly because it’s fun to say: Frappe, frappe, frappe, frappe! Say it loud and there’s music playing. Say it soft, and it’s almost like praying!
Perhaps you were unaware of the spices and sugar needed. And if you were going to make pumpkin custard, it’s even more complicated with eggs and such. Maybe IT will be a way to make pumpkin pies easier. On the other hand, a discussion about pumpkin pies clearly goes in MPSIMS um…or IMHO…OR Cafe Society. I think I’d go with MPSIMS.
Fenris
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### Author:  [@Why\_A\_Duck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Why_A_Duck)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2001, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-bibliophage/96124/5 "2001-11-30T15:14:41Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Fenris \*
> \*\*On the other hand, a discussion about pumpkin pies clearly goes in MPSIMS um…or IMHO…OR Cafe Society. I think I’d go with MPSIMS.
>
> Fenris \*\*
No no no. Our beloved mod **Ukelele Ike** has okayed the inclusion of food related threads to Café Society. Every bookstore has to have a Starbucks dontcha know.
BTW, it’s Frappé. You must have the é to make it truly sing.
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### Author:  [@reprise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/reprise)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2001, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-bibliophage/96124/6 "2001-11-30T15:21:49Z")
At least you got a “dear” **Bib**. No accusations of facism, Nazism or being part of the **cabal** - you must be doing something wrong. Clearly you need to take lessons from **Coldy** and \*\* Manny\*\* so you can get real Pit threads devoted to you.
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### Author:  [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2001, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-bibliophage/96124/7 "2001-11-30T15:22:54Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Why A Duck \*
> No no no. Our beloved mod **Ukelele Ike** has okayed the inclusion of food related threads to Café Society. Every bookstore has to have a Starbucks dontcha know.
>
> BTW, it’s Frappé. You must have the é to make it truly sing. \*\*
True! Everybody now:
Frappé **Frappé** _Frappé_ Frappé! **Frappé** _Frappé_ Frappé!
And while one can post recipes in Café Society, one’s not limited to it. Since Zenster’s masterwork (the Ultimate Recipe thread) is still in MPSIMS, I’d probably go with MPSIMS. If it gets moved to Café Society, then I will move with it. Wither it goes, so goeth I!
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### Author:  [@LiquidLobotomy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LiquidLobotomy)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2001, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-bibliophage/96124/8 "2001-11-30T15:31:48Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Fenris \*
>
> Perhaps you were unaware of the spices and sugar needed. And if you were going to make pumpkin custard, it’s even more complicated with eggs and such. Maybe IT will be a way to make pumpkin pies easier. On the other hand, a discussion about pumpkin pies clearly goes in MPSIMS um…or IMHO…OR Cafe Society. I think I’d go with MPSIMS.
>
> Fenris \*\*
I was unaware of the spices, but I did include plenty of sugar.
Why would it go in MPSIMS? I was clearly responding to The Great Gazoo.
---
### Author:  [@hawthorne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hawthorne)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2001, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-bibliophage/96124/9 "2001-11-30T15:35:00Z")
Coming soon in GQ: How adequate would **The Adequate Gazoo** be? Learnéd rather than humble opinions sought.
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### Author:  [@friedo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/friedo)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2001, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-bibliophage/96124/10 "2001-11-30T15:44:04Z")
Well, I gotta say, most mod-bashing pit-whines are the result of rather borderline abuses by the neo-fascist nazi commie bastard mofo moderators, but this was one of the most clear-cut examples of a non-GQ I’ve come accross. So quitcherbitchin.
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### Author:  [@BoBettie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoBettie)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2001, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-bibliophage/96124/11 "2001-11-30T15:44:40Z")
Seriously, how hard is it to figure out the forum decriptions?
**Question:
Let’s help Dean Kamen decide on a new project… :**
ATMB: I would like to see an entire forum dedicated to helping Dean K decide on a new project
COCC: I think Cecils column on Dean K’s future project possibilities was right on!
(same for staff reports)
GQ: There is no GQ because there isn’t even a topic to question.
GD: I think Dean Kamen’s new project possibilities are a possible bane to humanity. Discuss.
CS: Have you seen the movie about what Dean K’s new project might be? It rocked!
IMHO: What do you think Dean K’s new project should be?
MPSIMS: I like fantasizing about Dean K’s new project ideas.
BBQ: Dean K is a total Farquwad.
If it’s a poll/survery, it’s an IMHO. If it’s a question WITH A FACTUAL ANSWER, it’s a GQ. What is the problem?
Goddamned Nazi Mods (I’ve always wanted to say that)
Zette
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### Author:  [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2001, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-bibliophage/96124/12 "2001-11-30T17:13:10Z")
**The Great Gazoo** , please take this in a kind helpful tone that is implied.
Fuck you.
Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you!
Fuck you with a rusty chainsaw dripping with lemon juice being weilded by an epileptic monkey.
Jesus Fucking H Christ the third, this is the most stupid fucking thing I have ever read in the history of the written language. This is truly the most lame assed thing to get upset about ever within planetary history since they cancelled Laverne and Shirley.
God, right now, is up in the Kingdom of Heaven, looking down upon you and saying “what a fucked up cockswizzle. If he were worth the effort, I’d smite him with 10,000 plagues while humming the music to a Steelers Wheel song. But he’s not worth the effort, so you’re going to have to do it for me Ender.”
I’m in awe that the two synapsis on either of your ears could fire a bolt of electricity clear across your skull cavity which would allow you to even post this. Truly one must call Guinness.
You know what the best part is? I’m not even yelling at you for yelling at the moderator. No, no. That would be too easy. I’m yelling at you because you take yourself so damn seriously. A thread was locked. You have the chance to create a new one. Stop taking yourself so damn seriously because THIS ISN’T A BIG DEAL. Hangnails are a bigger annoyance than having my thread locked.
Learn some key breathing excercises and friggin deal.
May the force be with you.
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### Author:  [@Spritle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spritle)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2001, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-bibliophage/96124/13 "2001-11-30T18:25:46Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by The Great Gazoo \*
> \*\*You’re right. I learned my lesson. So long, asshole. \*\*
Don’t go away mad…
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### Author:  [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2001, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-bibliophage/96124/14 "2001-11-30T18:27:51Z")
I want my four minutes back.
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### Author:  [@Fledermaus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fledermaus)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2001, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-bibliophage/96124/15 "2001-11-30T18:48:41Z")
Was **The Great Gazoo** ’s original post any worse than **bibliophage** ’s post to close his previous thread?
> [@](#):
>
> _Originally posted by bibliophage:_
> Perhaps the lesson will sink in better if I allow you the fun of reposting in the appropriate forum, even though this will deprive me of the delight of moving it.
Perhaps I have missed out on other threads in which The Great Gazoo has been particularly obtuse about thread placements. However, the guy made a mistake about where his thread should go–fine, so move it to the appropriate thread, and maybe add a message like “Your thread has been moved to In My Humble Opinion because you are soliciting opinions from people. Please consider this in the future.” I hate seeing smart-ass comments from moderators since it means the inevitable pile-on will begin. I expect moderators to be above this sort of condescension. How often does a smart-ass remark serve to defuse and resolve a situation?
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### Author:  [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2001, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-bibliophage/96124/16 "2001-11-30T19:14:35Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Fledermaus \*
> **I hate seeing smart-ass comments from moderators…I expect moderators to be above this sort of condescension.**
Oh, thank you SO bloody much. Can’t we have ANY fun with this gig?
– Uke, staring morosely at the spot on the desk where the mug would be, if he had gotten one
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### Author:  [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2001, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-bibliophage/96124/17 "2001-11-30T19:25:07Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Fledermaus \*
> \*\*I expect moderators to be above this sort of condescension. \*\*
Really?
What do you base your expectations on? How will you enforce them?
I think **Bib’s** comments were perfectly in keeping with **Cecil’s** tradition of the cutting response.
Will any of us forget “If ignorance was corn flakes, you’d be Kelloggs?” (“Cheerios”/“General Mills”?)? I think not!
Fenris
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### Author:  [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2001, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-bibliophage/96124/18 "2001-11-30T19:43:36Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Ukulele Ike \*
> \*\*
>
> > [@](#):
> >
> > \*Originally posted by Fledermaus \*
> > **I hate seeing smart-ass comments from moderators…I expect moderators to be above this sort of condescension.**
>
> Oh, thank you SO bloody much. Can’t we have ANY fun with this gig?
>
> – Uke, staring morosely at the spot on the desk where the mug would be, if he had gotten one \*\*
I’d offer give you my mug but I’m still using it. 🙂
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### Author:  [@BoBettie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoBettie)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2001, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-bibliophage/96124/19 "2001-11-30T19:43:41Z")
Fenris,
I’ll never for get that. It was my first Cecil book and I got it as a gift when I was recovering from my spinal fusion. I laughed so hard at that particular line, I seriously thought I’d damaged myself. Oh the pain! Oh the laugh! Oh the agony!
I fully credit that particular book with my speedy recovery. I hadn’t laughed that hard in years.
Zette
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### Author:  [@Fledermaus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fledermaus)
#### Post date: [November 30, 2001, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-bibliophage/96124/20 "2001-11-30T20:21:49Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Fledermaus \*
> I expect moderators to be above this sort of condescension.
>
> > [@](#):
> >
> > _Originally posted by Fenris_
> > What do you base your expectations on?
I base this on the few times that I have seen threads moved in the past. It’s always been with a simple comment like “Moving thread to IMHO.” Period. No inflammatory remark that seemed to be written to get a rise.
> [@](#):
>
> _Originally posted by Fenris_:
> How will you enforce them?
I will start a grass-roots revolution among all posters with a post count under 100. Moderation will belong to the people! We will have our day! The streets will run red with the blood of the infid–okay, okay, I’ll probably just bitch and moan about it for a while.
> [@](#):
>
> _Originally posted by Fenris_:
> I think Bib’s comments were perfectly in keeping with Cecil’s tradition of the cutting response.
Maybe so, but I just cringe when I see a moderator say something like that _when they are performing a moderator function_. I can just anticipate the pile-on from other posters and pretty soon the “f— you, monkey-sniffing goat felcher!” epithets are flying around, and a moderator is stepping in again to put a halt to things.
Also, a moderator has a lot of power on a board. The comment from bibliophage just took me by surprise. It would be sort of like my network administrator telling me, “Sure, I could reset your password for you. You are a dumb computer user, though. If computer knowledge was cars, you’d be driving a Gremlin.” I know I’m an idiot to change my network password and then immediately forget it, but do I need to have my nose rubbed in it?
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