# Dear customer: I don't think we do that here **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 22, 2005, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-customer-i-dont-think-we-do-that-here/309359 "2005-06-22T14:15:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2005, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-customer-i-dont-think-we-do-that-here/309359/1 "2005-06-22T14:15:50Z")
Just received on a purchase order from a customer: ATTN VENDOR: PLEASE SHEEP ASAP. THANKS. ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2005, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-customer-i-dont-think-we-do-that-here/309359/2 "2005-06-22T14:20:24Z")
Reply to Vendor: LAST REQUEST UNCLEAR. PLEASE SPECIFY WHAT EWE WANT. ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2005, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-customer-i-dont-think-we-do-that-here/309359/3 "2005-06-22T14:22:09Z")
D’oh! :smack: That should be “Reply to Customer” of course. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Weird\_One](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7bcc69/32.png) [@The\_Weird\_One](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Weird_One)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2005, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-customer-i-dont-think-we-do-that-here/309359/4 "2005-06-22T14:24:27Z")
**BAA!** You’re welcome. ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2005, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-customer-i-dont-think-we-do-that-here/309359/5 "2005-06-22T14:28:23Z")
I just wish we sold computer parts. ATTN CUSTOMER: RAM ON BACKORDER. ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2005, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-customer-i-dont-think-we-do-that-here/309359/6 "2005-06-22T14:29:37Z")
Sorry But Our Stock Is Debleated. ---
**Author:** ![Celyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9dc877/32.png) [@Celyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Celyn)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2005, 2:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-customer-i-dont-think-we-do-that-here/309359/7 "2005-06-22T14:30:29Z")
But why should not sheep be pleased? Surely you want to go through life making things nicer for all the nice animalssesss? Hmm, it would be fun if the OP’s company sold **tup** perware. ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2005, 2:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-customer-i-dont-think-we-do-that-here/309359/8 "2005-06-22T14:30:44Z")
You know what I hate? THE STUPID CODING THAT AUTOMATICALLY FUCKS UP POSTS IF THEY ARE IN ALL CAPS. ---
**Author:** ![Finagle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@Finagle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Finagle)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2005, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-customer-i-dont-think-we-do-that-here/309359/9 "2005-06-22T14:59:03Z")
> [@jsgoddess](#): > > Just received on a purchase order from a customer: > > ATTN VENDOR: PLEASE SHEEP ASAP. THANKS. Sounds like an invitation to fleece them. ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2005, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-customer-i-dont-think-we-do-that-here/309359/10 "2005-06-22T15:06:21Z")
All right. Enough woolgathering. Back to work! ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2005, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-customer-i-dont-think-we-do-that-here/309359/11 "2005-06-22T15:09:58Z")
> [@Finagle](#): > > Sounds like an invitation to fleece them. I don’t believe you’d be able to pull the wool over their eyes. Especially if his name is “Harold”. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ea5d25/32.png) [@Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Scrappy_Hero_Pup)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2005, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-customer-i-dont-think-we-do-that-here/309359/12 "2005-06-22T15:12:09Z")
Maybe they’re just unfamiliar with protocol. Get a customer rep out there to shepherd them through the process. ---
**Author:** ![Scarlett67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scarlett67/32/7387_2.png) [@Scarlett67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarlett67)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2005, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-customer-i-dont-think-we-do-that-here/309359/13 "2005-06-22T15:27:33Z")
Shear nonsense, this is. ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2005, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-customer-i-dont-think-we-do-that-here/309359/14 "2005-06-22T16:02:02Z")
So is this customer from San Merino, by any chance? ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2005, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-customer-i-dont-think-we-do-that-here/309359/15 "2005-06-22T16:07:05Z")
> [@Sternvogel](#): > > So is this customer from San Merino, by any chance? Indiana. [Insert favorite Hoosier joke here.] ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2005, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-customer-i-dont-think-we-do-that-here/309359/16 "2005-06-22T16:19:12Z")
> [@jsgoddess](#): > > Indiana. [Insert favorite Hoosier joke here.] “Where the men are men and the sheep are nervous” ---
**Author:** ![Borborygmi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/borborygmi/32/217_2.png) [@Borborygmi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Borborygmi)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2005, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-customer-i-dont-think-we-do-that-here/309359/17 "2005-06-22T16:40:57Z")
You know, none of this is really a surprise as more and more people are making their purchases ovine. ---
**Author:** ![JimSox5](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b5a626/32.png) [@JimSox5](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JimSox5)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2005, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-customer-i-dont-think-we-do-that-here/309359/18 "2005-06-22T16:48:12Z")
> [@ShibbOleth](#): > > “Where the men are men and the sheep are nervous” I always thought that was Wyoming. . . [sub]Everybody knows we have many more cows, and let me tell you, some of those bulls get _pretty_ jealous.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Improv\_Geek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b3f665/32.png) [@Improv\_Geek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Improv_Geek)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2005, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-customer-i-dont-think-we-do-that-here/309359/19 "2005-06-22T16:52:29Z")
Sometimes things like this make kids of us all. Not to mention the vendor should be wary of a wolf in sheep’s clothing. ---
**Author:** ![Sean\_Factotum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Sean\_Factotum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sean_Factotum)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2005, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-customer-i-dont-think-we-do-that-here/309359/20 "2005-06-22T16:56:58Z")
Keep going with these bad puns, and I’ll be forced to go on the lamb from threads like this. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-customer-i-dont-think-we-do-that-here/309359.md?page=2)