# Dear December, you ignorant f\*\*\*!

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-december-you-ignorant-f/126957>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [September 4, 2002, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-december-you-ignorant-f/126957 "2002-09-04T14:44:54Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![The\_Ace\_of\_Swords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e495f1/32.png) [@The\_Ace\_of\_Swords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Ace_of_Swords)\
**Post date:** [September 4, 2002, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-december-you-ignorant-f/126957/1 "2002-09-04T14:44:54Z")

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Dear December,

You ignorant fuck! You haven’t the clue  
Of a glue-addled duck!  
Stop huffing the Elmers  
You gob-smackingly ignorant schmuck!  
We come to fight ignorance,  
Not to advance it  
But if your bilious posts were a boil we’d have lanced it!

You’re so ignorant, you’ve just won the race  
To be the first moron fucking shot into space!  
We talked to Lance Bass, and you’re off in his place!

Space Moron, listen, here on this earth,  
We believe in [innocent until proven guilty](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=133438), not the converse!  
Further, [Ashcroft _is_ a dictator](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=119786&highlight=december+bullshit), and Cheney – the same.

Why do I bother? from Cheney to Chaney,  
You can’t even [spell their fucking names!](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=132541&pagenumber=1)  
Moron Smurf, not just your opinions! You’re a jackass with facts  
The fact is, you’re balanced, you hate [arabs](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&postid=2374086&highlight=israel#post2374086), [women](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=120017&highlight=December), AND the [blacks](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=121143&highlight=December)!

That’s an impressive level of ignorant hate,  
For even a right-winger, I rate your hate first-rate!  
First-rate is a victory, for one whose education’s first-grade,  
We’d hate to get moron – I sure hope you’ve been spayed!

December, in the future, you might  
Not want to [Cite a radio show you think you happened one night](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&postid=1906984&highlight=Paul+Harvey#post1906984)  
You might as well say “I cite my ass _and_ a flashlight!”

* * *

The benighted December once removed his tinfoil hat  
He switched to [lame limericks](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&postid=2152796&highlight=december+limerick#post2152796)  
That almost even rhymes but ends up quite sickalus  
And he reverted back to his regular crap

* * *

What’s worser than worse,  
Please help me decide  
his opinions, his brains or his poetry  
Looks to me like a tie!  
Let’s all say thanks to December,  
And smile for it’s snide  
I give thanks to him daily:  
“Thank god he’s not on my side[!!](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/search.php?s=&action=showresults&searchid=181656&sortby=lastpost&sortorder=descending)”

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\
**Post date:** [September 4, 2002, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-december-you-ignorant-f/126957/2 "2002-09-04T14:50:42Z")

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Hee hee. Nothing like a common enemy to bring people together.

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**Author:** ![clayton\_e](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c57346/32.png) [@clayton\_e](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clayton_e)\
**Post date:** [September 4, 2002, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-december-you-ignorant-f/126957/3 "2002-09-04T14:54:36Z")

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Wow… YHTMTOYH.  
(and if you figure that one out you deffinately do)

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**Author:** ![Crusoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/49beb7/32.png) [@Crusoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crusoe)\
**Post date:** [September 4, 2002, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-december-you-ignorant-f/126957/4 "2002-09-04T14:56:25Z")

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I figured it out. And I certainly do!

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**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\
**Post date:** [September 4, 2002, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-december-you-ignorant-f/126957/5 "2002-09-04T14:58:12Z")

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. . .  
um . . . .

actually, if you want to suggest he’s high on something, perhaps Elmer’s isn’t the best choice. Being as how it’s nontoxic and all.

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**Author:** ![Maeglin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8baadc/32.png) [@Maeglin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maeglin)\
**Post date:** [September 4, 2002, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-december-you-ignorant-f/126957/6 "2002-09-04T14:58:25Z")

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Marvin K. Mooney will you please go now.

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**Author:** ![WV\_Woman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@WV\_Woman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WV_Woman)\
**Post date:** [September 4, 2002, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-december-you-ignorant-f/126957/7 "2002-09-04T15:14:43Z")

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Anyone ever notice that only conservatives get Pitted?

Anyone ever notice that when they do, they get talked to like they’re subhuman?

And December is the hateful one?

Mmmhmm.

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**Author:** ![gobear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8dc957/32.png) [@gobear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gobear)\
**Post date:** [September 4, 2002, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-december-you-ignorant-f/126957/8 "2002-09-04T15:20:27Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> Anyone ever notice that only conservatives get Pitted?

Not so. Raving loony lefties have been Pitted as well, especially during the election brouhaha and after 9/11.

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**Author:** ![Crusoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/49beb7/32.png) [@Crusoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crusoe)\
**Post date:** [September 4, 2002, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-december-you-ignorant-f/126957/9 "2002-09-04T15:22:35Z")

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When someone sharing your beliefs is attacked, you notice because it makes you angry. When someone who you disagree with is attacked, you may not notice as much because it does not bother you. Human nature, I suppose.

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**Author:** ![SuaSponte](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/67e7ee/32.png) [@SuaSponte](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SuaSponte)\
**Post date:** [September 4, 2002, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-december-you-ignorant-f/126957/10 "2002-09-04T15:25:54Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by WV\_Woman \*  
> \*\*Anyone ever notice that only conservatives get Pitted?  
> \*\*

**WV\_Woman,** Kindly type in the user names “Stoid,” “Ace0Spades,” “Hastur,” or “RTA,” to name a few, in the SDMB Search Engine - forum The BBQ Pit.

Anyone ever notice that only jackasses who make asinine and unsupported assertions - regardless of their ideology - get Pitted?\*

Sua

\*Yeah, I know, an overgeneralization. But it flowed so well.

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**Author:** ![Apos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/838e76/32.png) [@Apos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Apos)\
**Post date:** [September 4, 2002, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-december-you-ignorant-f/126957/11 "2002-09-04T15:26:07Z")

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----Human nature, I suppose.—

You dumbass: she’s a conservative: that means she’s to be reffered to as a SUBhuman!

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Crusoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/49beb7/32.png) [@Crusoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crusoe)\
**Post date:** [September 4, 2002, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-december-you-ignorant-f/126957/12 "2002-09-04T15:29:56Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Apos \*  
> \*\*----Human nature, I suppose.—
> 
> You dumbass: she’s a conservative: that means she’s to be reffered to as a SUBhuman! \*\*

Nah, that’d be mean. I prefer referring to anyone who shares my beliefs as _super_human.

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**Author:** ![ResIpsaLoquitor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b3f665/32.png) [@ResIpsaLoquitor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ResIpsaLoquitor)\
**Post date:** [September 4, 2002, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-december-you-ignorant-f/126957/13 "2002-09-04T15:30:01Z")

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\<-----never been pitted.

(Actually, I’m more moderate than conservative, but given that I’m a pro-life Catholic who tends to vote Republican, for all intents and purposes you can throw me into the “conservative” camp.)

I’ve got visions running through my head of somebody screaming “LOOKIT ME! I’M BEING PITTED! I’M A MARTYR FOR THE CAUSE! WHERE’S MY CHURCH?” :rolleyes:

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**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\
**Post date:** [September 4, 2002, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-december-you-ignorant-f/126957/14 "2002-09-04T15:31:38Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by WV\_Woman \*  
> \*\*Anyone ever notice that only conservatives get Pitted?
> 
> . \*\*

Naaah…

Do a pit-search on “Stoid” or on “Gang of Four” and you’ll see bunches of threads devoted to them, especially about **Stoid** around Dec/Jan 2001 and The Gang Of Four around 9/11 2001.

Besides, notice no-one’s agreeing with the Acehole? He’s a moron and as much of an embarassment to thoughful liberals as well, you are to thoughtful conservatives.

Fenris

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**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\
**Post date:** [September 4, 2002, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-december-you-ignorant-f/126957/15 "2002-09-04T15:43:26Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> Anyone ever notice that only conservatives get Pitted?

Well, someone’s bound to say it: Cite?

**WV\_Woman** , would you say **Justhink** is a conservative? Would you say **lekatt** is a conservative? Both have been Pitted in recent days, and it had nothing to do with any particular political views they may have.

People continue to Pit **december** because he routinely launches threads based on misrepresentations or fabrications of news reports, and because he is a stone bigot. Yep, some of the more volatile members seem to think of him as the devil incarnate, but he’s drawn objections from pretty much all parts of the political spectrum. Haven’t you noticed that numerous posters who bill themselves as conservatives have complained about **december** ’s posts in recent weeks?

But hey, the OP, cute as it may be, strikes me as a bit over the top, insult-wise.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![The\_Ace\_of\_Swords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e495f1/32.png) [@The\_Ace\_of\_Swords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Ace_of_Swords)\
**Post date:** [September 4, 2002, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-december-you-ignorant-f/126957/16 "2002-09-04T15:49:51Z")

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Fenris sez

> [@](#):
>
> He’s a moron and as much of an embarassment to thoughful liberals as well, you are to thoughtful conservatives.

Which party are you speaking for, the morons?

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**Author:** ![beagledave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6de8d8/32.png) [@beagledave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beagledave)\
**Post date:** [September 4, 2002, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-december-you-ignorant-f/126957/17 "2002-09-04T15:53:40Z")

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wv\_woman…do you **ever** own up to your asinine statements?

You tried this same shit a few weeks back claiming that Christians routinely get pitted more so than atheists.

I (and several other dopers…including Christians like myself) pointed out that absurdity of that statement…stessing that it was the **manner** of posting that usually resulted in pit threads. You never came back to re-cant that statement. Would you care to do the decent thing and re-cant now?

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**Author:** ![elf6c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c57346/32.png) [@elf6c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elf6c)\
**Post date:** [September 4, 2002, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-december-you-ignorant-f/126957/18 "2002-09-04T16:07:30Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by WV\_Woman \*  
> \*\*Anyone ever notice that only conservatives get Pitted?
> 
> Anyone ever notice that when they do, they get talked to like they’re subhuman?
> 
> And December is the hateful one?
> 
> Mmmhmm. \*\*

Maybe you keep getting Pitted because of your behavior and posts? Nah must be the vast left-wing conspirary against you arch-conservatives. Yeah, that’s the ticket. Pathetic. :smack:

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\
**Post date:** [September 4, 2002, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-december-you-ignorant-f/126957/19 "2002-09-04T16:16:26Z")

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are people expecting WV\_Woman to actually back her statments up? She never does, and believes that her simply saying something is enough.

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**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\
**Post date:** [September 4, 2002, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-december-you-ignorant-f/126957/20 "2002-09-04T16:56:53Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by WV\_Woman \*  
> \*\*Anyone ever notice that only conservatives get Pitted?
> 
> Anyone ever notice that when they do, they get talked to like they’re subhuman?
> 
> \*\*

This would be me, bursting into hysterical laughter, doubled over, and unable to speak further.

[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-december-you-ignorant-f/126957.md?page=2)
