# Dear Diane

**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-diane/3308
**Category:** The BBQ Pit
**Created:** [November 17, 1999, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-diane/3308 "1999-11-17T21:15:00Z")
**Posts on this page:** 5
**Page:** 6

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### Author: ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)
#### Post date: [December 9, 1999, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-diane/3308/101 "1999-12-09T23:07:00Z")

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_ **PAY NO ATTENTION TO THE TROLL BEHIND THE CURTAIN!!!** _

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### Author: ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)
#### Post date: [December 9, 1999, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-diane/3308/102 "1999-12-09T23:18:00Z")

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Damn. That would have been much more impressive on the previous page.

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### Author: ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)
#### Post date: [December 10, 1999, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-diane/3308/103 "1999-12-10T00:03:00Z")

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Hey, SINsApple…

## You fell for it too, man ! Bummer !

Coldfire

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“You know how complex women are”

- Neil Peart, Rush (1993)

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### Author: ![SINsApple](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eb8c5e/32.png) [@SINsApple](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SINsApple)
#### Post date: [December 10, 1999, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-diane/3308/104 "1999-12-10T00:59:00Z")

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How do you figure that I fell for it?

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“I celebrate myself, and sing myself, and what I assume you shall assume, for every atom belonging to me as good belongs to you.” --Whitman

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### Author: ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)
#### Post date: [December 10, 1999, 1:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-diane/3308/105 "1999-12-10T01:46:00Z")

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\<font size=4\>Forget nukes Coldfire! That would be too easy!  
We’ll use pea-shooters & fly-swatters! “The right tool for the right job.”

Ayesha- no, not chief slut. I was slating you for the Head Of the Secret Police, uniformed branch. Scarlet uniforms with gold braid-you’ll love it.

Kellibelli-- would you like to be on staff as our official “Fawn Hall”? Paper-shredding & …whatever. \</font\> ;0 :o

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Save The Endangered Jackalope! Send Cash Now! If You Do This, I Will Use The Cash To Save Any Jackalope That I Happen To Find! Send Cash Now! Before It’s Too Late! My Bills, I Mean **The Jackalope’s Bills** Are Due The 15th Of The Month!  
_This has been a message from the Illuminated Committee To Save The Jackalope. Fnord._

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