# Dear European Union **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 8, 2002, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-european-union/107936 "2002-05-08T18:04:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![lno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@lno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lno)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-european-union/107936/1 "2002-05-08T18:04:45Z")
Put down the crack and step away. Yes, I know it makes you feel funny inside. This is not a good funny you’re feeling. This is a bad funny. This is like when Uncle Norway got drunk and put the lampshade on his head and danced on the table and then fell over and hit his head and he ain’t been quite right since. [You’ve redesigned the EU flag.](http://www.ananova.com/yournews/story/sm_583273.html) Now, I understand your thinking. Unity. Diversity. Strength. Honor. Truth. Justice. The American Way. But for the love of the Congress of Vienna, that looks like a test pattern on a television. “Honey, whose tanks are those invading? Can you make out the flag?” “It looks like they’ve got a TV with a test pattern. It … it might be Tuvalu. Isn’t their TLD .tv?” Sheesh. Now I understand why people hate the EU. ---
**Author:** ![scout1222](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/34f0e0/32.png) [@scout1222](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scout1222)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-european-union/107936/2 "2002-05-08T18:09:48Z")
I love this quote from the article: > [@](#): > > “This is one of those ideas that would seem great around a boardroom table after a couple of Aussie chardonnays, but in practice it doesn’t work.” Horrendous flag. Let’s hope cooler heads prevail and prevent us from having to see this eye-numbing flag ever again. ---
**Author:** ![scout1222](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/34f0e0/32.png) [@scout1222](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scout1222)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-european-union/107936/3 "2002-05-08T18:11:17Z")
Thankfully, it seems that cooler heads _have_ prevailed: [http://www.ananova.com/yournews/story/sm\_583559.html](http://www.ananova.com/yournews/story/sm_583559.html) ---
**Author:** ![yojimbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yojimbo/32/232_2.png) [@yojimbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yojimbo)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-european-union/107936/4 "2002-05-08T18:23:34Z")
Holy shit what a horrible flag. The left hand side wasn’t bad but the rest was terrible 😉 ---
**Author:** ![London\_Calling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@London\_Calling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/London_Calling)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-european-union/107936/5 "2002-05-08T18:51:35Z")
But I’ve never had congress in Vienna…honestly, Matron, I wuvs only you. Actually, I’m much more concerned over the Euro currency which - and I don’t have any about my person to verify this - apparently depicts an old man’s flaccid penis on the right-hand side . It’s the currency I don’t have about my person, but thank you for asking. London Is-that-a-Euro-in-your-pocket-or-have you-prematurely-aged Calling ---
**Author:** ![lno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@lno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lno)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-european-union/107936/6 "2002-05-08T18:58:28Z")
I’m squinting and squinting, but either [these images](http://www.mazzaroth.com/ChapterSeven/EuroCoins.htm) are out of date, or I can’t see said flaccid penis. It’s one of those magic-eye puzzles, right? ---
**Author:** ![John\_Corrado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a88e4f/32.png) [@John\_Corrado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Corrado)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-european-union/107936/7 "2002-05-08T19:01:04Z")
Apparently, the flacid penis is specifically [Sweden](http://www.funny-funny-pictures.com/euro/). There’s a Power Station joke there that I’m not going near. Not yet, at least. And that flag- dear, sweet, Jesus. That looks like something my monitor would spit out after a memory crash. ---
**Author:** ![Bomkia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b5e925/32.png) [@Bomkia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bomkia)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-european-union/107936/8 "2002-05-08T19:09:03Z")
Would have been real beautiful if they had kept that flag-idea and then expanded the EU to 10-15 more countries 😛 ---
**Author:** ![MrVisible](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/46a35a/32.png) [@MrVisible](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrVisible)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-european-union/107936/9 "2002-05-08T19:20:16Z")
Wow. A flag that can provoke an epileptic seizure. That’s new. It looks like the kind of fabric that you’d buy at a thrift store so you could make the pants for a 1970’s disco-pimp halloween costume, just before you realized that it was a really bad idea and went as Jon-Benet Ramsey instead. ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-european-union/107936/10 "2002-05-08T19:23:37Z")
Jesus Christ on a pogo-stick, that flag sucks! ---
**Author:** ![sailor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a587f6/32.png) [@sailor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sailor)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-european-union/107936/11 "2002-05-08T19:36:51Z")
\>\> A flag that can provoke an epileptic seizure That’s the first thing I thought! I am now waiting for **december** to explain why all this proves how antisemitic , antiJewish and anti-Israel Europe is. ---
**Author:** ![sailor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a587f6/32.png) [@sailor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sailor)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-european-union/107936/12 "2002-05-08T19:42:52Z")
\>\> A flag that can provoke an epileptic seizure That’s the first thing I thought! I am now waiting for **december** to explain why all this proves how antisemitic , antiJewish and anti-Israel Europe is. ---
**Author:** ![London\_Calling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@London\_Calling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/London_Calling)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-european-union/107936/13 "2002-05-08T19:51:48Z")
Yewwwww, that’s a bit nobbly. Thanks for that, **John** …I think ! So Finland’s the sac and Norway’s absent due to a referendum – and hence the more clearly defined character of the region. Hmmm… Don’t know about that wallpaper, though. Reminds me of an Austin Powers set design. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2002, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-european-union/107936/14 "2002-05-09T01:59:09Z")
My eyes hurt. ---
**Author:** ![kabbes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e99b99/32.png) [@kabbes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kabbes)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2002, 10:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-european-union/107936/15 "2002-05-09T10:05:30Z")
No, I _like_ it. Wave _that_ flag at our enemies and you can expect instant capitulation. Or possibly a zombie-like trance. Wonderful. It even beats the Y-fronts of South Africa. pan ---
**Author:** ![Crusoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/49beb7/32.png) [@Crusoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crusoe)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2002, 10:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-european-union/107936/16 "2002-05-09T10:21:18Z")
It looks like something Channel 4 would use as an avant-garde promo background. ---
**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2002, 10:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-european-union/107936/17 "2002-05-09T10:26:03Z")
I am holding a 2 Euro bit in my hand, (Matron, my tablets please) and its the first time I’ve noticed it. But then again, Engilsh notes have had a hairy Lizzy on them for years!! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2002, 10:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-european-union/107936/18 "2002-05-09T10:51:24Z")
I like the flag. You can all fuck off. Bite me. ---
**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2002, 10:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-european-union/107936/19 "2002-05-09T10:58:25Z")
You are Laurence Llewellen Bowen and I claim my €5 ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2002, 11:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-european-union/107936/20 "2002-05-09T11:00:34Z")
How did you know?? Is my ruff showing? _flounces off_ [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-european-union/107936.md?page=2)