# Dear gluteus maximus, your sig is too big **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 8, 2004, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-gluteus-maximus-your-sig-is-too-big/233204 "2004-03-08T23:37:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2004, 8:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-gluteus-maximus-your-sig-is-too-big/233204/81 "2004-03-10T08:06:57Z")
And I’m dancing behind **Larry Mudd** with my thumbs in my ears and my tongue sticking out atcha. Geez, you’re a complete dweeb **NHIBI**. ---
**Author:** ![DarkPrince](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@DarkPrince](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DarkPrince)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2004, 11:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-gluteus-maximus-your-sig-is-too-big/233204/82 "2004-03-10T11:23:25Z")
> [@Lynn Bodoni](#): > > Nope. ONCE was a mistake. But you chose to deliberately paint a big honking target on yourself again, and now you’re whining because people are taking potshots at you? You’re going to have to learn. This message board is for adults who take responsibility for their own actions. You wanted to start a shitfest and it backfired on you. Boohoo. Live and learn. Next time, maybe you won’t be QUITE so eager to start a fight. > > Lynn > For the Straight Dope **Owned!** :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-gluteus-maximus-your-sig-is-too-big/233204/83 "2004-03-11T02:53:48Z")
Well, we can’t let the thread die now, can we? ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-gluteus-maximus-your-sig-is-too-big/233204/84 "2004-03-11T03:16:21Z")
For shame, **Lord Ashtar** – Don’t you know that bumping a thread for the sake of bumping a thread is not only _wrong_ but terribly naughty and makes the mods cry? You had no content, no meaning in your post, it was just a bump. Now if you’d said 'Well, we can’t let the thread that **NHIBI** , that twit started die now, can we?" I’d have had no problem with it. As it is, you’ve been very, _verrrry_ naughty. \< Grandpa Simpson voice \> For _shaaaaaaame_. \< /Grandpa Simpson voice \> As a pennance, I suggest you try again. Say…oh, every six or so hours as this thread drops below the half-way point on the front page. Fenris ---
**Author:** ![Gadfly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/aeb1de/32.png) [@Gadfly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gadfly)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-gluteus-maximus-your-sig-is-too-big/233204/85 "2004-03-11T03:26:35Z")
> [@Lynn Bodoni](#): > > Nope. ONCE was a mistake. But you chose to deliberately paint a big honking target on yourself again, and now you’re whining because people are taking potshots at you? You’re going to have to learn. This message board is for adults who take responsibility for their own actions. You wanted to start a shitfest and it backfired on you. Boohoo. Live and learn. Next time, maybe you won’t be QUITE so eager to start a fight. > > Lynn > For the Straight Dope Whoa. That was the most extroardinary act of mod 0wnage that I’ve ever witnessed. Go Lynn! ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 5:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-gluteus-maximus-your-sig-is-too-big/233204/86 "2004-03-11T05:53:53Z")
> [@Smeghead](#): > > Secondly, you may have noticed that every single person who has posted an opinion to this thread, excepting only yourself, agrees with me. If we can all see the “evidence,” and you can’t, what do you think that means? OHMIGAWD – that means we’re all delusional angry dimwits, far below the lofty intellectual heights of Oh, hell, I can’t be bothered. It’s too much like kicking a crippled warthog. I’d rather go roast [Libertarian\*\* for exceeding his daily allotment of rodomontade. ---
**Author:** ![Doomtrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Doomtrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doomtrain)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 6:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-gluteus-maximus-your-sig-is-too-big/233204/87 "2004-03-11T06:37:12Z")
[0wned!](http://www.gamingninjas.com/stuff/bodoni.jpg). Wish I was better with the Photoshop, but it deserves to be immortalized. ---
**Author:** ![gluteus\_maximus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f17d59/32.png) [@gluteus\_maximus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gluteus_maximus)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 10:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-gluteus-maximus-your-sig-is-too-big/233204/88 "2004-03-11T10:01:47Z")
> [@Lynn Bodoni](#): > > Yes, he broke a sig rule. > **gluteus maximus** , shorten your sig. I advise eliminating a couple of line breaks, and using a slash instead. > Lynn > For the Straight Dope Thanks, Lynn. I’ve shortened my sig. For the record, though, I used that sig in a post exactly once. It was in [this thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=243696) (go to the second page), which **Never Have I Because I** was not honest enough to link to. I posted four times in that thread, and only once used that overlong sig. The sig in question was merely (simply) a parody (humorous… I mean funny imitation ) of **Never Have I Because I** ’s own sig… actually, a verbatim (word-for-word) copy with an another quote appended (stuck on the end). **Never Have I Because I** was in fact, proud enough of that sig to start [an entire thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=243728) about it. Glutes ps: **Kurdt** , izzatchoo? ---
**Author:** ![gluteus\_maximus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f17d59/32.png) [@gluteus\_maximus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gluteus_maximus)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 10:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-gluteus-maximus-your-sig-is-too-big/233204/89 "2004-03-11T10:21:05Z")
Oh, and for the benefit of any latecomers, who may not have archived the sig which inspired this thread: > [@](#): > > _once sigged by **gluteus maximus** _ > > _BIG WORDS HURT, BIG WORDS KILL > MY FATHER WAS KILLED BY A BIG WORD IN A MILL > LOTS OF WORDS AREN’T BIG, USE THEM > (drum solo)_ – **NHIBI** , while the rest of us go on fighting ignorance > > My advice to you, you inimical cabbage, is to lurk until you learn, as I have, to minimize your idiocy when posting. > – **gadfly** So, let that be a guide to us all when in doubt about the length of our sigs. ---
**Author:** ![gluteus\_maximus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f17d59/32.png) [@gluteus\_maximus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gluteus_maximus)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 10:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-gluteus-maximus-your-sig-is-too-big/233204/90 "2004-03-11T10:22:51Z")
Here’s my new sig. ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 1:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-gluteus-maximus-your-sig-is-too-big/233204/91 "2004-03-11T13:40:41Z")
**NHIBI** , some friendly advice: Go lurk for awhile. You are WAY out of your league here. ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-gluteus-maximus-your-sig-is-too-big/233204/92 "2004-03-11T14:15:03Z")
> [@gluteus maximus](#): > > Here’s my new sig. You could modify it slightly as an homage to this message board: > [@](#): > > NOT being a jerk since 2004. Me, I like to use laudatory quotes as my sig, because I’m woefully insecure, and I covet nice things said about me like they’re the Holy Grail and a Cubs World Series combined. ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-gluteus-maximus-your-sig-is-too-big/233204/93 "2004-03-11T14:52:51Z")
> [@Fenris](#): > > For shame, **Lord Ashtar** – > > Don’t you know that bumping a thread for the sake of bumping a thread is not only _wrong_ but terribly naughty and makes the mods cry? > > You had no content, no meaning in your post, it was just a bump. > > Now if you’d said 'Well, we can’t let the thread that **NHIBI** , that twit started die now, can we?" I’d have had no problem with it. > > As it is, you’ve been very, _verrrry_ naughty. > > \< Grandpa Simpson voice \> > For _shaaaaaaame_. > \< /Grandpa Simpson voice \> > > As a pennance, I suggest you try again. Say…oh, every six or so hours as this thread drops below the half-way point on the front page. > > Fenris Sigh…you’re absolutely right. I shall now go hang my head in shame as penance. Then I will come back and bump this thread again if need be. ---
**Author:** ![jesuslynch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e99b99/32.png) [@jesuslynch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jesuslynch)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-gluteus-maximus-your-sig-is-too-big/233204/94 "2004-03-11T16:21:10Z")
> [@Lynn Bodoni](#): > > Nope. ONCE was a mistake. But you chose to deliberately paint a big honking target on yourself again, and now you’re whining because people are taking potshots at you? You’re going to have to learn. This message board is for adults who take responsibility for their own actions. You wanted to start a shitfest and it backfired on you. Boohoo. Live and learn. Next time, maybe you won’t be QUITE so eager to start a fight. > > Lynn > For the Straight Dope Hey, Cousin Vinnie. You forgot to log Lynn out before you posted. ---
**Author:** ![gluteus\_maximus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f17d59/32.png) [@gluteus\_maximus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gluteus_maximus)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-gluteus-maximus-your-sig-is-too-big/233204/95 "2004-03-11T16:27:30Z")
> [@dantheman](#): > > You could modify it slightly as an homage to this message board: > > > [@](#): > > > > _Suggestively, albeit inaccurately posted by **dantheman** _ > > NOT being a jerk since 2004. > > Me, I like to use laudatory quotes as my sig, because I’m woefully insecure, and I covet nice things said about me like they’re the Holy Grail and a Cubs World Series combined. > > * * * > > Come’re dantheman, lemme lick ya. - **Diane** > Those are very good points I admit I had not considered. What you say here makes a lot of sense. - **Una Persson** > Damned reasonable people. Who’m I gonna hate on now?" - **Hamadryad** I’ll take that under consideration, although, it _will_ make my sig longer, though still not as long as yours, **dantheman**. ---
**Author:** ![Ilsa\_Lund](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a6a055/32.png) [@Ilsa\_Lund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ilsa_Lund)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-gluteus-maximus-your-sig-is-too-big/233204/96 "2004-03-11T16:45:02Z")
> [@gluteus maximus](#): > > I’ll take that under consideration, although, it _will_ make my sig longer, though still not as long as yours, **dantheman**. Now somebody needs to start a Pit thread entitled “Dear gluteus maximus, your sig is too short.” ---
**Author:** ![gluteus\_maximus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f17d59/32.png) [@gluteus\_maximus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gluteus_maximus)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-gluteus-maximus-your-sig-is-too-big/233204/97 "2004-03-11T16:50:45Z")
> [@Ilsa\_Lund](#): > > Now somebody needs to start a Pit thread entitled “Dear gluteus maximus, your sig is too short.” Well, to be a more accurate antithesis of this thread, I believe the title should be “Dear **gluteus maximus** , your sig is too small.” ---
**Author:** ![gluteus\_maximus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f17d59/32.png) [@gluteus\_maximus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gluteus_maximus)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-gluteus-maximus-your-sig-is-too-big/233204/98 "2004-03-11T16:54:11Z")
…in which case, I may be forced to change my username to _ **signatorius minimus** _… ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-gluteus-maximus-your-sig-is-too-big/233204/99 "2004-03-11T16:57:01Z")
> [@gluteus maximus](#): > > Well, to be a more accurate antithesis of this thread, I believe the title should be “Dear **gluteus maximus** , your sig is too small.” Okay, how about this: > [@](#): > > Whoever said size doesn’t matter never met **Lynn Bodoni** At any rate, I hope you’re not implying mine’s too _long_. I mean, that’s not something I’ve heard before. ---
**Author:** ![gluteus\_maximus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f17d59/32.png) [@gluteus\_maximus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gluteus_maximus)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-gluteus-maximus-your-sig-is-too-big/233204/100 "2004-03-11T17:09:19Z")
> [@dantheman](#): > > At any rate, I hope you’re not implying mine’s too _long_. I mean, that’s not something I’ve heard before. Of course, the kind ones won’t tell you… or is it the mean ones…? I would never say something like that. That would be breaking the rules. I have never met **Lynn Bodoni** , but she has already told me in this very thread that size does indeed matter. I meant to say that mine is not as _big_ as yours… right now… in cyberspace… I am NOT jerking-off. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-gluteus-maximus-your-sig-is-too-big/233204.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-gluteus-maximus-your-sig-is-too-big/233204.md?page=6)