# Dear kanicbird: **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 11, 2010, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-kanicbird/539117 "2010-05-11T23:46:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-kanicbird/539117/41 "2010-05-12T15:02:37Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > Thank you **Skald the Rhymer** for this opportunity to clarify and think over a few things, God Bless you greatly! The God you worship, **kanicbird** , is a corrupt, vile, sociopathic, evil, diseased, sadistic monster worthy only of contempt. Fuck your God. ---
**Author:** ![Laudenum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7993a0/32.png) [@Laudenum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Laudenum)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-kanicbird/539117/42 "2010-05-12T15:13:30Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > The God you worship, **kanicbird** , is a corrupt, vile, sociopathic, evil, diseased, sadistic monster worthy only of contempt. Fuck your God. And he loves you. What does that say about you? ---
**Author:** ![Tethered\_Kite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a5b964/32.png) [@Tethered\_Kite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tethered_Kite)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-kanicbird/539117/43 "2010-05-12T15:14:37Z")
Mr. Logic meets Mr. Metaphor. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-kanicbird/539117/44 "2010-05-12T15:19:24Z")
> [@Laudenum](#): > > And he loves you. > What does that say about you? Who loves me? The God kanicbird worships? Not likely, as he’s imaginary. Plus, if he did exist, love is not something he’s ever shown. When did I turn into Der Trihs? Or perhaps you mean **kanic** himself loves me. I find that unlikely; certainly he does not act lovingly by any definition I recognize as valid. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Weird\_One](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7bcc69/32.png) [@The\_Weird\_One](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Weird_One)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-kanicbird/539117/45 "2010-05-12T15:28:13Z")
> [@Laudenum](#): > > And he loves you. > What does that say about you? The abuser may well love his victim. It does not obligate the victim to love or worship his abuser. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-kanicbird/539117/46 "2010-05-12T15:36:36Z")
> [@The\_Weird\_One](#): > > The abuser may well love his victim. It does not obligate the victim to love or worship his abuser. Actually I’d say that no abuser loves his victim, by my definition of _love_. Love is the state of mind in which the well-being and happiness of another person are essential to your own peace of mind. Love and abuse are incompatible, because one who truly loves another simply can’t abide the thought of the beloved’s suffering needlessly. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-kanicbird/539117/47 "2010-05-12T15:45:16Z")
Soul Ties? Wasn’t that a sitcom on NBC back in the '80s starring Michael J. Fox? > [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > I have heard it said, quite seriously, by a minister of the Church of God in Christ, that a woman who has sex with a man absorbs his semen into her bones. Well, duh. Where else are we going to store it for those times when we need to fertilize eggs but our men are at war? > [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > Quite apart from that, it’s pretty clear that abused children who _do_ become abusers don’t get cured once they’ve abused somebody else and stolen their soul. No, no, no. You don’t understand at all. You can’t repair a stolen soul. You can only temporarily patch it. The empty, sucking soul-hole will degrade the new stolen replacement soul, so eventually you need to steal another one. ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-kanicbird/539117/48 "2010-05-12T15:54:19Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > The God you worship, **kanicbird** , is a corrupt, vile, sociopathic, evil, diseased, sadistic monster worthy only of contempt. Fuck your God. What are the charges you bring against Lord Jesus from which you make this claim? ---
**Author:** ![asterion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/4da419/32.png) [@asterion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/asterion)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-kanicbird/539117/49 "2010-05-12T16:00:27Z")
> [@ivan\_astikov](#): > > They might not be doing it right! I think I saw a documentary on how to do it once. The abuser meets up with the one being abused in some desolate place. They then fight with swords until the abuser manages to cut off the abused’s head. At that point there is an atmospheric disturbance while the soul gets transferred. All this occurs while Queen plays in the background. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Excellent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f19dbf/32.png) [@Mr.Excellent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Excellent)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-kanicbird/539117/50 "2010-05-12T16:06:30Z")
> [@asterion](#): > > I think I saw a documentary on how to do it once. The abuser meets up with the one being abused in some desolate place. They then fight with swords until the abuser manages to cut off the abused’s head. At that point there is an atmospheric disturbance while the soul gets transferred. All this occurs while Queen plays in the background. There can only be one, however, so this cannot serve as an explanation for sexual abuse generally. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-kanicbird/539117/51 "2010-05-12T16:16:20Z")
Ooh. I think I’d go see Headless Sex Offender play. ---
**Author:** ![Cumberdale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8c91f0/32.png) [@Cumberdale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cumberdale)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-kanicbird/539117/52 "2010-05-12T16:20:06Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > What are the charges you bring against Lord Jesus from which you make this claim? Maybe that he is a _corrupt, vile, sociopathic, evil, diseased, sadistic monster worthy only of contempt]_ If you need more, just read the Bible, if fully explains what an awful monster this god guy is. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-kanicbird/539117/53 "2010-05-12T16:33:44Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > What are the charges you bring against Lord Jesus from which you make this claim? Oh, I’ll grant that Jesus is a nice enough fellow. If I drank beer I’d have a beer with him, except that he’s all dead & stuff. The God of the Old Testament is the vile monster; the best thing you can say about him is that he’s not as bad as Wotan. If you insist that Yahweh & Jesus are identical, then I have to lay the former’s numberless crimes at the latter’s feet. ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-kanicbird/539117/54 "2010-05-12T16:38:20Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Oh, I’ll grant that Jesus is a nice enough fellow. If I drank beer I’d have a beer with him, except that he’s all dead & stuff. > > The God of the Old Testament is the vile monster; the best thing you can say about him is that he’s not as bad as Wotan. If you insist that Yahweh & Jesus are identical, then I have to lay the former’s numberless crimes at the latter’s feet. **Skald** , Jesus and God are one in the same. So obviously you can’t bring charges against him/them, because they’re mentally incompetent to stand trial, what with the severe multiple personality disorder and everything. God wins again! ---
**Author:** ![Laudenum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7993a0/32.png) [@Laudenum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Laudenum)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-kanicbird/539117/55 "2010-05-12T16:45:46Z")
> [@Cumberdale](#): > > Maybe that he is a _corrupt, vile, sociopathic, evil, diseased, sadistic monster worthy only of contempt]_ If you need more, just read the Bible, if fully explains what an awful monster this god guy is. He asked about Jesus - not God/Jehovah/Yawah (never got the distinction). ---
**Author:** ![Cumberdale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8c91f0/32.png) [@Cumberdale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cumberdale)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-kanicbird/539117/56 "2010-05-12T16:58:47Z")
> [@Laudenum](#): > > He asked about Jesus - not God/Jehovah/Yawah (never got the distinction). As has been stated, Jesus and God are one in the same, with a little Holy Spirit thrown in. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-kanicbird/539117/57 "2010-05-12T17:39:15Z")
> [@Cumberdale](#): > > As has been stated, Jesus and God are one in the same, with a little Holy Spirit thrown in. Jesus is Jesus, and the Old Testament God is Jesus on a bender? ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-kanicbird/539117/58 "2010-05-12T17:46:34Z")
> [@Laudenum](#): > > He asked about Jesus - not God/Jehovah/Yawah (never got the distinction). I answered kanic’s question, noting that I haven’t a problem with Jesus until he is conflated with Yahweh, something not all Christians believe on. It hardly matters. Jesus is only vaguely historical, and the vast majority of what he “know” of him has no more factual basis than the adventures of Aslan. Yahweh is entirely fictional. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-kanicbird/539117/59 "2010-05-12T17:49:06Z")
> [@Cumberdale](#): > > As has been stated, Jesus and God are one in the same, with a little Holy Spirit thrown in. So in the Garden of Gethsemene, on the night on which he was betrayed, he was begging himself to be released from the torment and murder he himself had arranged for himself but finally agreed to suppress his own preferences in favor of his own plan? ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2010, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-kanicbird/539117/60 "2010-05-12T17:58:13Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > So in the Garden of Gethsemene, on the night on which he was betrayed, he was begging himself to be released from the torment and murder he himself had arranged for himself but finally agreed to suppress his own preferences in favor of his own plan? God offered himself up as a sacrifice to himself so that he could find it in his heart to forgive his creations for doing what he designed them to do. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-kanicbird/539117.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-kanicbird/539117.md?page=4)