# Dear SUV driver: Not to put too fine a point on it ... **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 17, 2003, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-suv-driver-not-to-put-too-fine-a-point-on-it/149301 "2003-01-17T20:52:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Pucky\_Schumer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/74df32/32.png) [@Pucky\_Schumer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pucky_Schumer)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-suv-driver-not-to-put-too-fine-a-point-on-it/149301/1 "2003-01-17T20:52:16Z")
Dear SUV driver: Not to put too fine a point on it, but you are a FARKING DICKWEED MORON. There was perhaps two or three inches of snow on the roads last night, most of it reduced to easily handled slush by the traffic. But you, with your oversize SUV are the one who spun out on the sole road leading into my neighborhood. You created a backup about a mile and a half long and kept people there for more than an hour. If you insist on owning an SUV, then WHEN THE FUCK ARE YOU GOING TO LEARN HOW TO DRIVE IT? An SUV does not mean you are nailed to the ground with super-traction. The high center of gravity does not allow you to drive it like a sports car. The higher weight of an SUV gives you absolutely shitty stopping distances. If there is one vehicle that ought to be going slower in such road conditions IT IS AN SUV. Maybe when you climb into your personal tank, you feel all that metal around you and extra weight under you, and you think you’re safe. So you drive like boy racer and then you are surprised that you can’t stop or maneuver in time. Sad thing is that often a lot of other people have to pay for your stupidity. Where’s my checkbook? I don’t like most radical politics, but I think I’m going to endow a local chapter of the Earth Liberation Front – provided they make you their first mission. ---
**Author:** ![Robb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/a183cd/32.png) [@Robb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robb)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-suv-driver-not-to-put-too-fine-a-point-on-it/149301/2 "2003-01-17T21:15:01Z")
Of course, if you had an SUV, you could have off-roaded around the problem. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-suv-driver-not-to-put-too-fine-a-point-on-it/149301/3 "2003-01-17T21:23:46Z")
I never have that sort of problem in my 2002 Mazda Armageddon 4X4. I grind Geo Metros and suchlike under my oversized tires and find that it improves traction mightily. ---
**Author:** ![Pucky\_Schumer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/74df32/32.png) [@Pucky\_Schumer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pucky_Schumer)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-suv-driver-not-to-put-too-fine-a-point-on-it/149301/4 "2003-01-17T21:26:33Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Robb \* > \*\*Of course, if you had an SUV, you could have off-roaded around the problem. > > 😉 \*\* Off-road over a guard rail? :wally ---
**Author:** ![Robb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/a183cd/32.png) [@Robb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robb)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-suv-driver-not-to-put-too-fine-a-point-on-it/149301/5 "2003-01-17T21:30:05Z")
> [@](#): > > Off-road over a guard rail? If a guard rail is a problem, you don’t have a big enough SUV. ---
**Author:** ![CrankyAsAnOldMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crankyasanoldman/32/11670_2.png) [@CrankyAsAnOldMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrankyAsAnOldMan)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-suv-driver-not-to-put-too-fine-a-point-on-it/149301/6 "2003-01-17T21:34:53Z")
Whee! An SUV thread! And just in time to take advantage of those new stats that show death rates 3X higher in SUVs! The “I love my wife and child, unlike you pikers, so I want them safe in an SUV” argument suddenly takes a lethal shot… ---
**Author:** ![MrMyth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e19b73/32.png) [@MrMyth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrMyth)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-suv-driver-not-to-put-too-fine-a-point-on-it/149301/7 "2003-01-17T21:35:07Z")
Damn, I thought it was a joke that you could set your watch by these rants. Here’s a question - did you see the accident happen? Were they actually driving recklessly or are you assuming that to be the case because its an SUV? Would your rant exist if somebody flipped a Miata? ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-suv-driver-not-to-put-too-fine-a-point-on-it/149301/8 "2003-01-17T21:39:26Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Pucky Schumer \* > \*\*The higher weight of an SUV gives you absolutely shitty stopping distances. \*\* Is this right? I thought stopping distance wasn’t related to weight, because the higher momentum you need is cancelled out by the higher gravitational pull that…hmm. Well, anyway, I don’t want to get in the way of a good SUV rant. I hate 'em. ---
**Author:** ![Mikahw](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Mikahw](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mikahw)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-suv-driver-not-to-put-too-fine-a-point-on-it/149301/9 "2003-01-17T21:48:46Z")
> [@](#): > > If a guard rail is a problem, you don’t have a big enough SUV. Sorry, I really don’t think that [this](http://www.bigfoot4x4.com/bf5.html) is street legal. ---
**Author:** ![Pucky\_Schumer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/74df32/32.png) [@Pucky\_Schumer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pucky_Schumer)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-suv-driver-not-to-put-too-fine-a-point-on-it/149301/10 "2003-01-17T21:49:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by MrMyth \* > **Damn, I thought it was a joke that you could set your watch by these > rants.** Should tell you something about the prevelance of ignorant pigfuckers driving SUVs. > [@](#): > > Here’s a question - did you see the accident happen? Scene of the accident. Only one vehicle. An SUV. Perhaps Mulder and Scully should be called in to unravel how this really was a plot by UFOs to discredit SUV drivers. :rolleyes: > [@](#): > > Were they actually driving recklessly or are you assuming that to be the case because its an SUV? A reckless SUV driver? Oh that’s a stretch, I know. > [@](#): > > Would your rant exist if somebody flipped a Miata? In a two-hour trip home, I saw two vehicles stuck. One was a larger car. The other an SUV. Didn’t see any Miatas stuck. Just an asshole with an SUV. ---
**Author:** ![Robb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/a183cd/32.png) [@Robb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robb)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-suv-driver-not-to-put-too-fine-a-point-on-it/149301/11 "2003-01-17T21:54:17Z")
> [@](#): > > Sorry, I really don’t think that this is street legal. Boy howdy. Just imagine the anti-SUV rants we would have if they were street legal. ---
**Author:** ![World\_Eater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-suv-driver-not-to-put-too-fine-a-point-on-it/149301/12 "2003-01-17T21:56:57Z")
You possess exceptional extrapolation powers **Pucky**. Just by rubbernecking the accident scene, Amazing. ---
**Author:** ![davidw](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c4cdca/32.png) [@davidw](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidw)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-suv-driver-not-to-put-too-fine-a-point-on-it/149301/13 "2003-01-17T22:00:34Z")
Hey, here’s some ammo for the SUV-bashers. [http://www.thenewrepublic.com/doc.mhtml?i=20030120&s=easterbrook012003](http://www.thenewrepublic.com/doc.mhtml?i=20030120&s=easterbrook012003) ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-suv-driver-not-to-put-too-fine-a-point-on-it/149301/14 "2003-01-17T22:00:54Z")
Dear **Schmucky** : not to unduly interrupt your blithering flow of bile, but the annals of traffic accidents include many cases where some moron strays into the lane of another car, cuts another driver off etc. and then exits the scene, causing the other driver to spin out/crash. Or maybe the SUV driver in your neighborhood had to make an emergency stop to avoid a deer. Or a child. Maybe you could stick to making viable points based on actual evidence, you ruptured sack of putrefying pustulence. ---
**Author:** ![Realhoops](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8dc957/32.png) [@Realhoops](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Realhoops)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-suv-driver-not-to-put-too-fine-a-point-on-it/149301/15 "2003-01-17T22:06:37Z")
I love the fact that this person is a “FARKING DICKWEED MORON” because they did this in an SUV, not because they did this at all. Naturally it’s the fact they own an SUV that makes them a dickweed moron, and not the fact that they were driving like an idiot. We got about 8 inches of snow in my area a couple days ago and I saw three or four cars who were spinning their tires at stoplights and such on my way to work. None were in SUV’s. So I guess I should follow the OP’s logic and conclude that that they were all asswipes specifically because they were driving sedans, not because they didn’t know how to drive in the snow and ice. Bastards in family cars anyway! ---
**Author:** ![MrMyth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e19b73/32.png) [@MrMyth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrMyth)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-suv-driver-not-to-put-too-fine-a-point-on-it/149301/16 "2003-01-17T22:11:18Z")
I’m not even going to argue this further, **Pucky** , because you answered all my questions (and prayers for this thread incidentally). Try not to get mauled on the way home by one o’ those durn sneaky SUV’s. ---
**Author:** ![Pucky\_Schumer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/74df32/32.png) [@Pucky\_Schumer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pucky_Schumer)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-suv-driver-not-to-put-too-fine-a-point-on-it/149301/17 "2003-01-17T22:12:13Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jackmannii \* > **Dear Schmucky: not to unduly interrupt your blithering flow of bile, but the annals of traffic accidents include many cases where some moron strays into the lane of another car, cuts another driver off etc. and then exits the scene, causing the other driver to spin out/crash. Or maybe the SUV driver in your neighborhood had to make an emergency stop to avoid a deer. Or a child.** Okay, you’re right. I apologize. Based on widespread observation of SUV drivers, this one had doubtlessly stopped to safeguard a group of baby ducklings attempting to cross the road, while handing out literature on protecting the manatees from speedboats. BTW, are all those widdle bitty, mean old cars picking on yousum, hmm? We have crack down on all those folks causing you to crash your overweight, tip-heavy SUVs. > [@](#): > > [Maybe you could stick to making viable points based on actual evidence, you ruptured sack of putrefying pustulence. \*\* Viable: Having real meaning, pertinence, etc. On the premise of many SUV drivers being fuckwits, your post makes the premise _emminently_ viable. ---
**Author:** ![MrMyth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e19b73/32.png) [@MrMyth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrMyth)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-suv-driver-not-to-put-too-fine-a-point-on-it/149301/18 "2003-01-17T22:17:58Z")
Don’t forget to tip your waitress folks. He’ll be here all week. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-suv-driver-not-to-put-too-fine-a-point-on-it/149301/19 "2003-01-17T22:32:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Pucky Schumer \* > **Okay, you’re right. I apologize. Based on widespread observation of SUV drivers…** Hope you’ll publish soon. The world’s literature contains a distinct shortage of unfounded jaw-flapping.\*\* > [@](#): > > BTW, are all those widdle bitty, mean old cars picking on yousum, hmm?\*\* No, I hardly notice as I grind them and their puny fist-waving drivers into metallic compost.\*\* > [@](#): > > On the premise of many SUV drivers being fuckwits, your post makes the premise _emminently_ viable. \*\* Knowing how to spell “eminently” would be a viable goal for you. And take the bus. ---
**Author:** ![light\_strand](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a6a055/32.png) [@light\_strand](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/light_strand)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-suv-driver-not-to-put-too-fine-a-point-on-it/149301/20 "2003-01-17T22:40:43Z")
So you SUV supporters are trying to say that a single vehicle accident is probably _not_ due to reckless and/or careless driving? If it isn’t then what the hell is your definition of “reckless driving”. And remind me not to be on the road when you’re out. I too have seen the “_Snow means nothing to me, for I am in an SUV!_”[sub]insert maniacal laughter here[/sub] attitude. In fact I’ve even felt it myself when last driving a Blazer in a blizzard (That kinda rolls off the tongue don’t you agree). I think that far too many SUV drivers fail to realize that 4x4 does not mean that road conditions do not apply to you. But my real gripe are the semi-trucks that drive by going 70 splashing me out of my lane with that mushy salty snow, in a snow storm! [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-suv-driver-not-to-put-too-fine-a-point-on-it/149301.md?page=2)