# Death by grapes? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [February 27, 2010, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-by-grapes/530660 "2010-02-27T17:16:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![runcible\_spoon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9fc29f/32.png) [@runcible\_spoon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/runcible_spoon)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2010, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-by-grapes/530660/21 "2010-02-27T21:27:40Z")
If you’re constrained to the kinds of bags grapes usually come in - i.e., perforated - then I’d have to think it’d be tough - you’d be losing grape-mass on every hit. If you can get your grapes in a sufficiently-hardy plastic bag to contain them, though, I’d say hell yes. To go with the pillow analogy - well, I’ve been to the Great Pillow Fight, and lemme tell ya, those suckers can hurt, if you get hit in the head hard enough. Part of it’s just the impact, part of it’s bouncing the head around - at the very least, I’d think a strong enough person could swing a bag of grapes hard enough to do some brain damage. ---
**Author:** ![Declan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecae2f/32.png) [@Declan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Declan)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2010, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-by-grapes/530660/22 "2010-02-27T21:44:13Z")
Simple go to store , pick up grapes , black powder and rent your black powder cannon. Load and tamp, and then give em a whiff of the grape. Declan ---
**Author:** ![Alan\_Smithee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/2acd7d/32.png) [@Alan\_Smithee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alan_Smithee)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2010, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-by-grapes/530660/23 "2010-02-27T22:01:24Z")
> [@Dag\_Otto](#): > > There is only one poster who can answer this, and he is long gone. It took me a second when I first read this, and then I literally laughed out loud. ---
**Author:** ![si\_blakely](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d9b06d/32.png) [@si\_blakely](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/si_blakely)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2010, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-by-grapes/530660/24 "2010-02-27T23:15:18Z")
It isn’t just the mass, it is the behaviour of the centre of gravity and the contact area - 2 pounds of grapes will have a CoM that keeps moving past the point of contact, thus reducing the instantaneous contact force and spreading the impact over a wide time period and a bigger area. This will be more of an issue as the grapes smoosh onto mushy liquid. By comparison, 2 pounds of rock will have a smaller contact area and (because the structure does not change on impact) the CoM will not change as impact occurs - a high instantaneous contact force delivered into a small area over a small time interval. Two pounds of buckshot or sand has higher density than the grapes, but is more flexible than rock, so provides a balance - enough contact force to render unconscious, but not so much as to break the skull or kill. In theory. In practice, you will have no real idea, and the line between a lethal blow and a stunning one is pretty fine. Si ---
**Author:** ![Peter\_Morris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peter_morris/32/359_2.png) [@Peter\_Morris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peter_Morris)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2010, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-by-grapes/530660/25 "2010-02-27T23:16:54Z")
Reminds me of an old song: _An accident happened to my brother Jim When somebody threw a tomato at him. Tomatoes are soft and they don’t bruise the skin But this one did cos it came in the tin._ ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2010, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-by-grapes/530660/26 "2010-02-27T23:23:55Z")
Don’t forget that a bag of grapes contain some stems. They could do the job if the victim has hemophelia. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Hamster\_King](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8edcca/32.png) [@The\_Hamster\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Hamster_King)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2010, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-by-grapes/530660/27 "2010-02-27T23:39:27Z")
[The Horribly Slow Murderer with the Extremely Inefficient Weapon](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9VDvgL58h_Y) ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2010, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-by-grapes/530660/28 "2010-02-28T04:20:54Z")
Are we limited to human strength? Because if you get those grapes moving fast enough, sure, they’ll splatter on impact, but they’ll splatter the victim, too. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2010, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-by-grapes/530660/29 "2010-02-28T04:36:07Z")
> [@Alan\_Smithee](#): > > F = M \* A > If you could accelerate the grapes to a high enough speed, you could do damage. I am going to go out on a limb and say 0.9 C might do it. ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2010, 5:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-by-grapes/530660/30 "2010-02-28T05:39:35Z")
> [@Peter\_Morris](#): > > Reminds me of an old song: > > _An accident happened to my brother Jim > When somebody threw a tomato at him. > Tomatoes are soft and they don’t bruise the skin > But this one did cos it came in the tin._ Along that line, if you ferment the grapes and hit the victim with the bottle they are in… ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2010, 5:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-by-grapes/530660/31 "2010-02-28T05:53:24Z")
> [@DCnDC](#): > > Question: exactly how does one procure the appropriate “skill” to bludgeon someone to death with a bag of grapes? The path of the ninja. ---
**Author:** ![Max\_the\_Immortal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/6de8d8/32.png) [@Max\_the\_Immortal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_the_Immortal)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2010, 10:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-by-grapes/530660/32 "2010-02-28T10:06:49Z")
I suppose your best bet would be to sneak up on your target and try to snap their neck with one powerful hit. That may not qualify as beating them to deal, though. If it does, it’s just a question of whether it’s humanly possible to swing the bag hard enough. Or you could just reach into the bag, grasp the stems firmly, and punch them to death. Kinda like brass knuckles. ---
**Author:** ![njtt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ecd19e/32.png) [@njtt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/njtt)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2010, 11:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-by-grapes/530660/33 "2010-03-01T11:18:05Z")
Death by Grapes - Band name! ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2010, 12:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-by-grapes/530660/34 "2010-03-01T12:54:00Z")
> [@DCnDC](#): > > … but in reality, who’s going to stand idly by and allow themselves to get whacked with a bag of mushy grapes for hours on end? Ah, the things I’ve done for love… You might not be able to kill with a bag of grapes, but you can with a bag of grape-nuts. But then you’d be a cereal killer. ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2010, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-by-grapes/530660/35 "2010-03-01T13:11:04Z")
People who jump from the Golden Gate bridge don’t die from drowning, they die from blunt-force trauma - broken bones, shattered skulls, that sort of thing. When you hit the water at 120 MPH, you experience a decel of several hundred g’s, and it’s just too much for your body to take. Fact is, water is dense, and if it hits you hard enough, it doesn’t particularly matter that it’s a liquid; it’ll do damage. Which is to say that the structure of the grapes (or lack thereof) isn’t a particularly difficult problem, as long as we can get them moving fast enough. So can we accelerate a bag of grapes to ludicrous speed using human power? With a plastic bag of grapes at arm’s length, probably not. MLB pitchers can achieve slightly over 100 MPH using every muscle and link in their arm/hand/finger applied to a lightweight baseball; with a two-pound bag of grapes slung by an average Joe, it would be difficult to get the speed anywhere near that high, and if we did, the bag wound probably tear due to the centripetal acceleration of the grapes. If we are permitted the use of a length of rope, the attacker could whirl the bag of grapes around on the end of the rope. The larger swing radius would allow human power to achieve higher grape speeds, and would also result in lower g-loading, reducing the risk of bag rupture. I doubt we could get it up to 120 MPH because of aero drag, but I would think 70-80 MPH might be doable. The brain, what with being inside a skull, is pretty well protected. It might be possible to cause a concussion, but maybe not. Another option might be to go for an abdominal strike, in hopes of rupturing the spleen (or other organs) and causing the victim to bleed internally. Spleens are famous for that sort of thing. ---
**Author:** ![Gagundathar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a183cd/32.png) [@Gagundathar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gagundathar)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2010, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-by-grapes/530660/36 "2010-03-01T13:33:48Z")
> [@Hypno-Toad](#): > > Ah, the things I’ve done for love… > > You might not be able to kill with a bag of grapes, but you can with a bag of grape-nuts. But then you’d be a cereal killer. nonononononono You did NOT just post that! aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhh ---
**Author:** ![Enright3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/enright3/32/2897_2.png) [@Enright3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enright3)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2010, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-by-grapes/530660/37 "2010-03-01T14:16:21Z")
Does anyone else think think that this would make a good Mythbusters episode? ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2010, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-by-grapes/530660/38 "2010-03-01T14:24:05Z")
If we’re positing a hypothetical indestructible and leak-proof plastic bag (and we can tie a knot in it to contain the liquid), and a victim who does not resist say, they’re tied into a chair, then I think we could kill them with a bag of grapes - repeatedly and forcefully beating them around the head with a couple of pounds of grape pulp in a bag will eventually break some skin on their face and from there, it should be possible to aggragate it until they bleed to death. ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2010, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-by-grapes/530660/39 "2010-03-01T14:59:02Z")
I’m going back to the throat. I think repeated blows to the front of the throat would eventually impede breathing. Doesn’t really matter whether the grapes are round or mushed, in fact I think mushed might be more effective as there is less cushioning effect on the blow. C’mon, I’ll race 'ya! We need two test subjects, who’s up for it? ---
**Author:** ![smiling\_bandit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@smiling\_bandit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smiling_bandit)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2010, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-by-grapes/530660/40 "2010-03-01T15:13:55Z")
> [@TruCelt](#): > > I’m going back to the throat. I think repeated blows to the front of the throat would eventually impede breathing. Doesn’t really matter whether the grapes are round or mushed, in fact I think mushed might be more effective as there is less cushioning effect on the blow. > > C’mon, I’ll race 'ya! We need two test subjects, who’s up for it? Nah, the blow will soon become lightly cushioned and the grape mass fallen out and the bage broken open. You’ll wind up trying to kill sombody by hitting them with a soft, wet, torn plastic baggie. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-by-grapes/530660.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-by-grapes/530660.md?page=3)