# DEATH- denial, anger, acceptance...? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [May 27, 2005, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-denial-anger-acceptance/305687 "2005-05-27T00:09:05Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2005, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-denial-anger-acceptance/305687/1 "2005-05-27T00:09:05Z")
How does that go again? šŸ˜• ---
**Author:** ![Cyros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a698b9/32.png) [@Cyros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cyros)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2005, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-denial-anger-acceptance/305687/2 "2005-05-27T00:11:13Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > How does that go again? šŸ˜• The five stages of grief? Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance. ---
**Author:** ![mamboman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecb155/32.png) [@mamboman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mamboman)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2005, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-denial-anger-acceptance/305687/3 "2005-05-27T01:18:09Z")
> [@Cyros](#): > > The five stages of grief? Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance. Iā€™ve read seven: Shock, Denial, Bargaining, Fear, Anger, Despair, and Acceptance mm ---
**Author:** ![Cunctator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/43a26b/32.png) [@Cunctator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cunctator)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2005, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-denial-anger-acceptance/305687/4 "2005-05-27T01:24:22Z")
The five given by \*\*Cyros \*\* are the same ones that Iā€™ve always heard (denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance). Theyā€™re the ones described by Elisabeth KĆ¼bler-Ross in her well know work _On Death and Dying_. ---
**Author:** ![commasense](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/commasense/32/3017_2.png) [@commasense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/commasense)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2005, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-denial-anger-acceptance/305687/5 "2005-05-27T01:33:38Z")
Elisabeth Kubler-Rossā€™ five stage of dying: ā€¢ Denial and isolation: ā€œThis is not happening to me.ā€ ā€¢ Anger: ā€œHow dare God do this to me.ā€ ā€¢ Bargaining: ā€œJust let me live to see my son graduate.ā€ ā€¢ Depression: ā€œI canā€™t bear to face going through this, putting my family through this.ā€ ā€¢ Acceptance: ā€œIā€™m ready, I donā€™t want to struggle anymore.ā€ [Here](http://www.uky.edu/Classes/PHI/350/kr.htm) is a critique and further explanation of the theory. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2005, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-denial-anger-acceptance/305687/6 "2005-05-27T01:37:36Z")
Just remember, not everyone goes thru them all, they generally donā€™t go thru them in order, and people tend to jump around back and forth from one stage to another. Ideally they end up in and can stay in acceptance before meeting their end. But itā€™s not a one-way linear progression. ---
**Author:** ![fighting\_ignorant](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ac8455/32.png) [@fighting\_ignorant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fighting_ignorant)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2005, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-denial-anger-acceptance/305687/7 "2005-05-27T01:38:57Z")
Someone had to say it: > [@](#): > > Dr. Hibbert: Now, a little death anxiety is normal. You can expect to go through five stages. The first is denial. > Homer: No way! Because Iā€™m not dying! > Dr. Hibbert: The second is anger. > Homer: Why you little! > Dr. Hibbert: After that comes fear. > Homer: Whatā€™s after fear? Whatā€™s after fear? > Dr. Hibbert: Bargaining. > Homer: Doc, you gotta get me out of this! Iā€™ll make it worth your while! > Dr. Hibbert: Finally, acceptance. > Homer: Well, we all gotta go sometime. > Dr. Hibbert: Mr. Simpson, your progress astounds me. ---
**Author:** ![hildea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ebca7d/32.png) [@hildea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hildea)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2005, 9:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-denial-anger-acceptance/305687/8 "2005-05-27T09:54:23Z")
ā€¦and according to Dogbert, itā€™s Denial, Anger, Acceptance, and Economy. With the punch line ā€œBury him wrapped in some newspapers. Thatā€™s what he would have wanted.ā€ (Quoted from imperfected memory.) ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2005, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-denial-anger-acceptance/305687/9 "2005-05-27T19:31:26Z")
Iā€™ve found that these stages are applicable whenever people are confronted with bad news or a tragic event, not necessarily their impending death. ---
**Author:** ![Jake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f475e1/32.png) [@Jake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jake)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2005, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-denial-anger-acceptance/305687/10 "2005-05-27T20:12:38Z")
Great quote! ---
**Author:** ![SpoilerVirgin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4491bb/32.png) [@SpoilerVirgin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpoilerVirgin)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2005, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-denial-anger-acceptance/305687/11 "2005-05-27T20:28:51Z")
Iā€™m just shocked that a poster named **DrDeth** didnā€™t already have this memorized. ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2005, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-denial-anger-acceptance/305687/12 "2005-05-27T20:48:31Z")
> [@fighting ignorant](#): > > Someone had to say it: Iā€™m glad it only took 7 posts. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2005, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-denial-anger-acceptance/305687/13 "2005-05-27T21:02:27Z")
_Wings_ (a much underrated series) had a scene where Thomas Haden-Church goes through the stages in about eight seconds. ---
**Author:** ![Number](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/number/32/242_2.png) [@Number](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Number)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2005, 7:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-denial-anger-acceptance/305687/14 "2005-05-28T07:15:52Z")
> [@SpoilerVirgin](#): > > Iā€™m just shocked that a poster named **DrDeth** didnā€™t already have this memorized. It isnā€™t true. It canā€™t be. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2005, 8:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-denial-anger-acceptance/305687/15 "2005-05-28T08:04:29Z")
> [@SpoilerVirgin](#): > > Iā€™m just shocked that a poster named **DrDeth** didnā€™t already have this memorized. Because none of those things means squat when Death really comes for youā€¦ šŸ˜› ---
**Author:** ![Indyellen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/indyellen/32/4176_2.png) [@Indyellen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indyellen)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2005, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/death-denial-anger-acceptance/305687/16 "2005-05-28T14:48:34Z")
> [@Qadgop the Mercotan](#): > > Just remember, not everyone goes thru them all, they generally donā€™t go thru them in order, and people tend to jump around back and forth from one stage to another. Ideally they end up in and can stay in acceptance before meeting their end. But itā€™s not a one-way linear progression. I once saw a chart that was drawn as a circle with double-ended arrows around the circle between the stages. Made a lot of sense. Itā€™s more practical/realistic than visualizing it as some kind of one-way flow chart. > [@panache45](#): > > Iā€™ve found that these stages are applicable whenever people are confronted with bad news or a tragic event, not necessarily their impending death. Thatā€™s documented. ([Wikipedia article](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grief)) Grief is applicable to ANY loss. Depending on the severity of the loss you may go through the stages faster than other losses. IANAPsychiatrist, but I did a research paper on the stages of grief for a psychology class I took. It stuck with me.