# Decembrants **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 1, 2012, 5:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/decembrants/642652 "2012-12-01T05:34:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![EmilyG](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/emilyg/32/364_2.png) [@EmilyG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EmilyG)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2012, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/decembrants/642652/81 "2012-12-03T21:53:42Z")
I’m so sad to hear that, **Soylent**. ---
**Author:** ![WolfpackJeep](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpackjeep/32/2921_2.png) [@WolfpackJeep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WolfpackJeep)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2012, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/decembrants/642652/82 "2012-12-04T00:14:29Z")
Oh geez **Soylent** …that’s terrible. ☹ > [@Lacunae\_Matata](#): > > Dear KMart: How 'bout spending a few dollars maintaining your stores, or maybe at least maintaining stock in your stores, instead of spending megabucks advertising every other commercial break with “The lights the lights the [motherfucking] lights”? I would be perfectly happy to shop at K vs. Wal if only anything were ever in stock, or the parking lot weren’t so dark and sketchy. And by all that’s holy, that “Lights” song should be taken out and shot - every single recording of it, the writer, the singer, the studio musicians, and the tech running the sound board during the recording session, along with the advertising person who chose the “song” for your holiday campaign. > > On a related note: > Dear Facebook friends: I’ll say happy holidays if I want to, bitches. No one is depriving you of anything by wishing you “happy holidays/[holy days]” instead of “Merry Christmas [Christ’s Mass.]” Have a freaking fabulous Festivus, why don’tcha? I’ve been looking for a place to complain about that damn song. Next up: Kroger and their soulless “buy gift cards use like cash save on fuel”, made even worse by the fact that I’m pretty sure they’re trying to imitate the vocal stylings of last year’s Hyundai commercials. Do any of your Facebook friends insist on calling it CHRISTmas every time they post? Makes me want to go join a coven or something just for the bragging rights. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2012, 12:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/decembrants/642652/83 "2012-12-04T00:27:10Z")
At least they aren’t bringing up that “In God we Trust” dollar coin thing from 2009, like my friends are. I’d been crazy free for so long, that I’d forgotten what it was like. ---
**Author:** ![Rack-a-Bones](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rack-a-Bones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rack-a-Bones)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2012, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/decembrants/642652/84 "2012-12-04T02:04:09Z")
> [@WolfpackJeep](#): > > Oh geez **Soylent** …that’s terrible. ☹ > > I’ve been looking for a place to complain about that damn song. Next up: Kroger and their soulless “buy gift cards use like cash save on fuel”, made even worse by the fact that I’m pretty sure they’re trying to imitate the vocal stylings of last year’s Hyundai commercials. > > Do any of your Facebook friends insist on calling it CHRISTmas every time they post? Makes me want to go join a coven or something just for the bragging rights. I’ve gotten a few FB posts to that effect as well. If you want to say ‘Merry Christmas’ be my guest, doesn’t bother me. Hell, I’m happy you’re in a festive mood. Just don’t go into a flagellating fit if I say ‘Happy Holidays.’ There are after all a few holidays coming up, and whatever your affiliation or affliction may be, I really do hope you enjoy them all. If it really bothers you that much, just remember that just over a week ago most of us were giving thanks. You should give thanks that you live in a society where generally, the people that want to punch you in the head probably won’t. ---
**Author:** ![by-tor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/by-tor/32/266_2.png) [@by-tor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/by-tor)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2012, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/decembrants/642652/85 "2012-12-04T02:26:25Z")
You may think it looks cool but no one cares or wants to see your lame-ass thirty second to two minute long intro to your YouTube video. Especially when the rest of the video is one minute long. Just get to the fucking content already, lamer! ---
**Author:** ![Seanette](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/seanette/32/9139_2.png) [@Seanette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seanette)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2012, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/decembrants/642652/86 "2012-12-04T02:53:17Z")
> [@Rack-a-Bones](#): > > If it really bothers you that much, just remember that just over a week ago most of us were giving thanks. You should give thanks that you live in a society where generally, the people that want to punch you in the head probably won’t. Where do you live that anyone was giving thanks? As far as I could tell, here in the US, it’s “Black Friday Races”. The attitude seems to be “What do you mean, give thanks for what we have? Gotta have MORE!!! What do you mean, spend time with family and friends? Gotta be first in line for the STUFF!!!” Every year, I get more disgusted and discouraged by how Christmas is turning more and more into Greedmas. ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2012, 5:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/decembrants/642652/87 "2012-12-04T05:13:00Z")
> [@flatlined](#): > > **Morgyn** , I’m glad that you don’t have water leaking anymore. I’ve been living in a motel with crappy internet for a week, so I while I was watching your saga with the water, I had problems posting. Thanks. 🙂 I got off lightly, all things considered. I think between the plumber-plumber, the fire suppression plumber, and the security system technician, it still came in under $300. It could have been so much worse. What if that leak had sprung over my bookshelves??? > [@flatlined](#): > > I do have to laugh at the idea that Walgreens will go under because nobody will buy singing raindeer because the batteries are reversed. I wouldn’t mess with the cards, they are away from the cashiers and the batteries are imbedded. Oh, not just Walgreens. Western civilization as we know it will collapse if those cards are messed with. It’s a long, complicated chain of dominoes, but I promise you, if enough of those cards are messed with, by December 21, teh woooooorld will come to an end! :eek::eek::eek::eek::eek: ---
**Author:** ![curlcoat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea5d25/32.png) [@curlcoat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/curlcoat)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2012, 5:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/decembrants/642652/88 "2012-12-04T05:46:22Z")
Look, old guy on bicycle. I’m sorry my car popped up in front of you so suddenly but goddamnit, you aren’t supposed to be on the sidewalk! Riding against traffic!! ---
**Author:** ![flatlined](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eb9ed0/32.png) [@flatlined](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flatlined)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2012, 5:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/decembrants/642652/89 "2012-12-04T05:49:44Z")
> [@Joey\_P](#): > > Is the gun safe a safe for long arms? Maybe you could try and jam as much in there as possible and full the bulk with blankets so they don’t rattle around then lock it shut. Wearing a sidearm might keep them convinced to leave it alone. > Either that or put all the guns in the trunk of the car being towed so they don’t even know they exist. I thought about doing that and then driving, but I’ll be spending the Wednesday night at a hotel. I wouldn’t be comfortable leaving them in the car, and well…I think that people wouldn’t be comfortable watching me making multiple trips to carry guns into my room. The place I’m going to be on Wednesday has a parking lot that will allow me to back the truck to a brick wall. The movers said they couldn’t take them, so it wouldn’t be smart to try to trick them into taking them. What if an accident happened and the movers didn’t know that they needed to secure my guns? I know I sound paranoid, but as a responsible gun owner, its my responsibility to keep them safe. > [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > You have entered the Lair of the Rat King, and have survived to tell about it. Traveling across a couple of states shouldn’t worry you. If anyone bothers you, just throw them in a fountain. Or into a shredder, feet first. > > Now I’m curious…when you move here, will you increase the average number of guns that Texans own, or decrease it? > [@kayT](#): > > I for one am eagerly awaiting the new set of stories from your new home, **flatlined**! > Good luck on your trip. We’re all thinking of you and hoping you don’t have to shoot anyone on the way to Houston. Thanks you guys 🙂 Nothing is going to happen. Its going to be a long and beautiful drive until I hit the city. Then its going to be really scary because I’ll be driving a rented truck and won’t be able to go faster than 70, if I’m lucky. At least I’ll have a heavy moving truck between all those people who are driving at least 110 in a 55 zone. **Lynn,** I hope I do Texas proud. Bill only has one gun and I have _cough_ several. At least I’ll be raising the average in one household. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2012, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/decembrants/642652/90 "2012-12-04T06:03:35Z")
> [@curlcoat](#): > > Look, old guy on bicycle. I’m sorry my car popped up in front of you so suddenly but goddamnit, you aren’t supposed to be on the sidewalk! Riding against traffic!! We watched an episode of Judge Judy tonight where I thought she really got it wrong - a cyclist cycled across a crosswalk and hit a car - Judge Judy said the car driver was in the wrong. I totally disagree with that - cyclists come out of nowhere at a high rate of speed and fly across a crosswalk, and drivers really have no chance to see them and react when they come out of places where you don’t expect them (and where they’re not supposed to be), at such high speeds. ---
**Author:** ![curlcoat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea5d25/32.png) [@curlcoat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/curlcoat)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2012, 6:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/decembrants/642652/91 "2012-12-04T06:25:29Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > We watched an episode of Judge Judy tonight where I thought she really got it wrong - a cyclist cycled across a crosswalk and hit a car - Judge Judy said the car driver was in the wrong. I totally disagree with that - cyclists come out of nowhere at a high rate of speed and fly across a crosswalk, and drivers really have no chance to see them and react when they come out of places where you don’t expect them (and where they’re not supposed to be), at such high speeds. I’m having trouble coming up with a scenario where the driver could be considered even slightly in the wrong and all I’ve got is the car had stopped for a red light and ended up in the crosswalk. Even then, the bike shouldn’t have been in the crosswalk! ---
**Author:** ![Rack-a-Bones](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rack-a-Bones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rack-a-Bones)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2012, 7:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/decembrants/642652/92 "2012-12-04T07:42:59Z")
> [@Seanette](#): > > Where do you live that anyone was giving thanks? As far as I could tell, here in the US, it’s “Black Friday Races”. The attitude seems to be “What do you mean, give thanks for what we have? Gotta have MORE!!! What do you mean, spend time with family and friends? Gotta be first in line for the STUFF!!!” > > Every year, I get more disgusted and discouraged by how Christmas is turning more and more into Greedmas. I guess we’re old fashioned. I somehow managed to tune out the commercial hysteria Christmas has become and concentrate on the good that still does happen: toy drives, filling up the food banks, that cop that bought the homeless guy shoes, etc. I knowI’m getting away from the rantiness… FWIW: I hope the guy who stole \*\*Gesturing Mildly’s \*\*bike finds his nuts going ‘twap, thwap, thwap’ in some wheel spokes like the jack of hearts used to do in my old ten speed. ---
**Author:** ![Seanette](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/seanette/32/9139_2.png) [@Seanette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seanette)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2012, 8:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/decembrants/642652/93 "2012-12-04T08:57:53Z")
> [@Rack-a-Bones](#): > > I guess we’re old fashioned. I somehow managed to tune out the commercial hysteria Christmas has become and concentrate on the good that still does happen: toy drives, filling up the food banks, that cop that bought the homeless guy shoes, etc. I knowI’m getting away from the rantiness… > > FWIW: I hope the guy who stole \*\*Gesturing Mildly’s \*\*bike finds his nuts going ‘twap, thwap, thwap’ in some wheel spokes like the jack of hearts used to do in my old ten speed. I like your approach to Christmas. Sad to say it’s getting rarer every year, it seems. I agree with your wishes for the bike thief. ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2012, 11:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/decembrants/642652/94 "2012-12-04T11:51:14Z")
It’s the USPS’s 100th anniversary of “[Operation Santa Claus](http://operationlettertosanta.com/)!” Please consider stopping by [one of the few regional post offices](http://operationlettertosanta.com/Pages/chapters.htm) that are collecting letters from needy families and helping out. Oh yeah, the rant. Last year at my husband’s post office, in one of the richer suburbs of Chicago, a very finely-dressed woman from that suburb, who lives in a huge house, drives an expensive car, and has a very well-employed husband, was incensed that her child did not receive a present via the program. The explanation that these were donations from the public for poor kids who would not otherwise receive presents didn’t change her opinion; she seemed to think hers was more deserving. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![kayT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayt/32/3633_2.png) [@kayT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayT)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2012, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/decembrants/642652/95 "2012-12-04T13:41:43Z")
If your mall has a Salvation Army Angel Tree go pick up one or two. I don’t support the Salvation Army much but this project is wonderful. My DH and I don’t “do” Christmas; we give money to some charities and tell friends and family that we will be donating not giving gifts. We had so much fun shopping for the 9 year old and the newborn we got from the Angel Tree (sorry for the icky name but it’s a great project). Oh, this is supposed to be rants; well then my rant is that when we were at the mall there were still a TON of angels on that tree. So go get one or three, dammit! ---
**Author:** ![Catamount](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/catamount/32/2840_2.png) [@Catamount](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catamount)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2012, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/decembrants/642652/96 "2012-12-04T16:02:21Z")
> [@Becky2844](#): > > To the people who preach that TV is a bad thing and they (almost) never watch it—I’ll turn off my TV when they pry the remote out of my cold dead hand. I don’t have a TV. I don’t care that you watch it. I do feel like a visitor from another planet sometimes when my co-workers ask me if I saw that show/newscast/commercial last night. Y’all know I don’t have a TV. Why do you keep asking me? > [@](#): > > To the doctor who’s insisting I get a heart sonigram because of a “functional” murmur _I’ve had my whole life_, just because HE has now heard it: bite me. I don’t have insurance. (And he knows it.) Heh. I once had four doctors run into the room when a nurse at Duke Pediatrics heard my on-again/off-again heart murmur for the first time. My mom just laughed and said, “She’s had that her whole life.” The same thing happened when someone at the same hospital saw the mole on my side that would have all the indicators of being precancerous if it hadn’t been like that from the day I was born. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2012, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/decembrants/642652/97 "2012-12-04T17:05:41Z")
> [@curlcoat](#): > > I’m having trouble coming up with a scenario where the driver could be considered even slightly in the wrong and all I’ve got is the car had stopped for a red light and ended up in the crosswalk. Even then, the bike shouldn’t have been in the crosswalk! That’s what I thought, too - how can you be in the right when you’re doing something illegal? > [@Ferret\_Herder](#): > > It’s the USPS’s 100th anniversary of “[Operation Santa Claus](http://operationlettertosanta.com/)!” Please consider stopping by [one of the few regional post offices](http://operationlettertosanta.com/Pages/chapters.htm) that are collecting letters from needy families and helping out. > > Oh yeah, the rant. Last year at my husband’s post office, in one of the richer suburbs of Chicago, a very finely-dressed woman from that suburb, who lives in a huge house, drives an expensive car, and has a very well-employed husband, was incensed that her child did not receive a present via the program. The explanation that these were donations from the public for poor kids who would not otherwise receive presents didn’t change her opinion; she seemed to think hers was more deserving. :smack: Heeyuge sense of entitlement - check! ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2012, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/decembrants/642652/98 "2012-12-04T17:54:47Z")
I just returned from the eye doctor after visiting for the 9th time in the last two months (the first 5 were a different eye doctor. I gave up and found a new one.) I’ve been having ridiculous headaches and blurred vision. The new guy delivered the unfortunate news: I can no longer wear contact lenses. So after, uh, 17 years of wearing contacts, I just went and picked up my new glasses. I hate wearing glasses, so I am not exactly thrilled about this turn of events. I picked up a fairly chunky pair, because why the hell not? I am a nerd, I might as well embrace it. Now I feel 12 again, all self-conscious and insecure. What if the other kids make fun of meeeee? On the other hand, I can see. So, there’s that. ---
**Author:** ![Jenaroph](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e8c25b/32.png) [@Jenaroph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jenaroph)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2012, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/decembrants/642652/99 "2012-12-04T19:13:12Z")
Dear lord, somebody on my Facebook feed posted an urban legend I’d never heard before - that cut onions will somehow absorb all the flu virus out of a room. Also, since onions are so good at absorbing viruses and bacteria, you should never eat a cut onion more than a couple of hours old - they’re now POISONOUS and will make you sick! Apparently this one predates germ theory, so I can fathom people putting their faith in it, say, 200 years ago, and old habits die hard. But Jesus fuck, knowing today how germs actually work, it doesn’t even make any SENSE. How anyone could believe such nonsense and pass it on without taking the .5 seconds to think about it and say to themselves “you know, I’m not sure how having a cut onion in the room is supposed to soak up all the VIRUSES AND BACTERIA FROM THE AIR AND DOORKNOBS AND COUNTERTOPS AND ALL SORTS OF THINGS IT’S NOT EVEN TOUCHING so maybe this email is shall we say not entirely truthful.” This is a college educated person who posted this. I posted back that it’s an urban legend and to please don’t depend on onions to keep you safe from the flu; I don’t know what kind of response I’m going to get, but I tried to keep it gentle while rolling my eyes HARD… ---
**Author:** ![Kimballkid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b5a626/32.png) [@Kimballkid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimballkid)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2012, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/decembrants/642652/100 "2012-12-04T19:18:37Z")
> [@Joey\_P](#): > > Not sure. I think I remember one being mentioned way up in the 400’s somewhere. Higher then my radio went. > > [SiriusXM.com](http://SiriusXM.com)’s channel lineup lists… > 96 Laugh USA > 97 Blue Collar > 98 The FoxxHole > 99 Raw Dog > 160 Laugh Attack > 400 Carlin’s Corner > 403 Dirty Dog > 403 UCB Radio (Upright Citizens Brigade) > > If they mention 6, I’d guess it’s 96,97,98,99,160,403. Could be an old stat. FoxxHole is just kind of all around station. Some comedy, some music, some health. Kind of a like a “Man Show” version of the Oprah station (which, BTW sucks now that she retired from her TV show and just plays reruns all day). > > Anyways, last I checked, I can’t get the 400 channels, but I’ll have to check on 160 next time I’m in my car. I remember liking Laugh Attack, I just assumed they got rid of it. I don’t know what’s going on as my 160 is a French language public affairs channel. I wonder if it depends on if you have Sirius, XM or SiriusXM. I’ve yet to figure all that out. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/decembrants/642652.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/decembrants/642652.md?page=6)