I wrote a thread a couple of years ago about the way few people know how to properly set up their bathroom for guests.
Spare toilet paper visible to your guests. At least one roll, more if your guests are going to be there longer. Don’t embarrass them by making them have to ask. Do this even if the roll is almost full. What if it falls into water or something?
A clean hand towel. I hate those stupid decorative towels, because they usually have some embroidery or strip of satin that makes them practically worthless for drying your hands (be sure to dry your hands on the three inches of actual terry cloth we’ve left for you). But for Og’s sake, at least make sure the damn thing is cleaned periodically. I have someone over almost every Friday, and not only do I change the towel weekly, I make sure to pick one that looks different than the previous week’s towel, so he doesn’t have to worry that I’m using moldy towels.
Soap that is obviously meant to be used. I always keep liquid soap next to my sinks, because I don’t like bar soaps that other people have used. But not everyone wants you to use their decorative soaps, so either make it obvious they can be used, or provide either a plain bar of soap or a dispenser of liquid soap.
A wastebasket. I cannot emphasize this enough. Damn it, some of us are women with menstrual cycles. You do not want that trash going into the toilet.
This thread seems to have run its course, so I just wanted to thank everyone who participated. It’s my first rant here on the SDMB, and I had no idea it would make it to three full pages. Obviously I tapped into something deep here. I hope you found it as cathartic as I did.
For the record, I have nothing against Connecticut. I just picked a state that seemed about the right size for the task at hand, and which hasn’t done much for us lately. But perhaps Nevada’s Yucca Mountain site would be more suitable for burying all our decorative soaps, now that it’s uncertain whether it will hold the nation’s nuclear waste. Or perhaps, if there’s room, the two purposes can be combined, with the nuclear waste entombed in millions of little melted soaps. Wouldn’t that be perfect? Sure, the place would still be lethally radioactive for 300,000 years, but at least it would smell delightful.
Well, it wasn’t soap, but it was in a little church bathroom in Meiringen, Switzerland, 1978, where we were searching for my husband’s roots. (Actually, we weren’t searching for his roots in the bathroom, but you know what I mean.) I had to use the john, as per, and was greeted with a roll of toilet paper, hanging on its roller, and festooned with mushrooms!They were shaped like grayish half- discs. The toilet paper was grayish.I don’t believe I used the paper, regarding it as a relic that had been preserved through the centuries, but don’t recall what was available as a surrogate.
We have a toilet rug, so that your feet don’t have to be on the cold floor while you’re doing your business.
The fuzzy toilet seat covers are there for the cats. Luna likes to sit on the toilet lid while she waits for us to finish showering. She wants to be close at hand so she can lick up the shower water while it’s fresh.
Our house is run primarily for the convenience and comfort of the Neville kitties. Anyone who can’t deal with this should probably not come to our house.
There are no votive candles in our bathroom, also thanks to the cats. Because of them, we have a “no unattended lit candles” rule in effect at all times.
I make my own scented glycerin soaps as a hobby, and occasionally I use molds shaped like hearts, flowers, seashells, etc. I give them to my mom or sister, and they like to put them in their bathrooms, and actually use them. My daughter likes the starfish-shaped soaps I make for her because they remind her of SpongeBob’s friend Patrick, and because I make hers unscented, since most scented, commercially available soaps irritate her skin. I don’t mind if my family uses the soaps I make, since I can always make more. I just try to leave a slightly-used soap next to the similarly-shaped ones in the guest bathroom, so guests will get the hint that it’s OK to wash their hands with it. As for the decorator towel, I don’t bother with it. A nice, clean hand towel that is not frayed or stained is good enough for me and my guests (yes, even zombie guests :))
Don’t ban decorative soap! When the Christmas clock is ticking and I have yet to get something for my female coworker about whom I know nothing except that she likes Labradoodles, and I see a shop selling soap in the shape of Labradoodles, hooray, I am saved. I don’t care if she uses the soap or not. Actually I hope she does so I can buy her another one next year. Everyone knows people who are hard to buy for but like some kind of animal, so you buy something consumable in that shape if you can. Ideally chocolate, because someone in that person’s family/circle of acquaintances will happily eat it, if not, candles, soap, etc.
As for bathroom decoration, it’s the only room in my house I feel I have 100% control over. I can keep it clean because it is tiny. It doesn’t accumulate stacks of paper like my bedroom so cleaning may be physical work but it doesn’t take any mental effort or angst. (Oh crap, here’s a letter from Aunt Matilda I should have answered a month ago!) It doesn’t have a big turnover in stuff coming in and out like my kitchen. A small outlay of money can make it look good because it is so small. I like the $3 octopus no-slip stickers in my bathtub.
But yeah, help yourself to any soap/towels/tourniquets/whatever.
I find the OP’s suggestions of what is acceptable somewhat suspicious:
So, real soap that’s not to be used is a problem, but fake fruit isn’t (in two rooms no less!).
Great OP, professionally done. Professionally done by the bullshit fake fruit that makes you want some grapes but there are none in the house marketing division.
I was recently in a relative’s house, and they were using napkins that said, in embossed gold, “Howard’s Bar Mitzvah.” Howard is now a grandfather; those napkins should have turned to parchment by now.
I think that this is wise, as someone whose house experienced a fire caused by an unattended candle. The little container just up and broke. I always, always, always blow out bathroom candles.