# Deliver bad news to someone on (their) vacation or not? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 15, 2012, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deliver-bad-news-to-someone-on-their-vacation-or-not/625273 "2012-06-15T19:17:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![DCnDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dcndc/32/2842_2.png) [@DCnDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DCnDC)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2012, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deliver-bad-news-to-someone-on-their-vacation-or-not/625273/1 "2012-06-15T19:17:10Z")
[Note: this is purely hypothetical] You have agreed to feeding a friend’s beloved cats while they are out of town for a couple of weeks on an expensive and much-anticipated trip. The animals all appear to be healthy when you take over for their care. Three days after your friend departs, through absolutely no fault of anybody, one of the animals suddenly dies; it can neither be foreseen or prevented in any way. Do you contact and tell your friend immediately, certainly ruining their trip, or do you wait until they return? ---
**Author:** ![Taomist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/53a042/32.png) [@Taomist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taomist)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2012, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deliver-bad-news-to-someone-on-their-vacation-or-not/625273/2 "2012-06-15T19:18:09Z")
Well…I’d want to wait, but what to do with the poor kitty in the meantime? ---
**Author:** ![Sicks\_Ate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Sicks\_Ate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sicks_Ate)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2012, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deliver-bad-news-to-someone-on-their-vacation-or-not/625273/3 "2012-06-15T19:19:23Z")
No way, don’t tell them. ---
**Author:** ![Omar\_Little](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omar_little/32/269_2.png) [@Omar\_Little](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omar_Little)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2012, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deliver-bad-news-to-someone-on-their-vacation-or-not/625273/4 "2012-06-15T19:23:25Z")
They’re cats. Let those folks enjoy their vacation. > [@Taomist](#): > > Well…I’d want to wait, but what to do with the poor kitty in the meantime? What you do with all dead cats. Put 'em in a shallow grave, to keep the smell down; or burn them. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2012, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deliver-bad-news-to-someone-on-their-vacation-or-not/625273/5 "2012-06-15T19:27:04Z")
You could always bury it before going on vacation: just to be on the safe side. ---
**Author:** ![Rhiannon8404](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rhiannon8404/32/17929_2.png) [@Rhiannon8404](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhiannon8404)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2012, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deliver-bad-news-to-someone-on-their-vacation-or-not/625273/6 "2012-06-15T19:27:28Z")
When we go on vacation we leave emergency contact info with our pet sitter, including what to do in case of _all_ emergencies: vet info, card on file at the vet, etc. Depending on what kind of trip we’re on, depends on what I want to know. I love my dogs and cats like no one else, but if i am on the vacation of a lifetime, someplace far, I don’t want to hear about their demise. If I am on our annual Disneyland trip or camping or something, I don’t mind leaving early if tragedy strikes. ---
**Author:** ![Omar\_Little](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omar_little/32/269_2.png) [@Omar\_Little](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omar_Little)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2012, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deliver-bad-news-to-someone-on-their-vacation-or-not/625273/7 "2012-06-15T19:28:14Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > You could always bury it before going on vacation: just to be on the safe side. Should have been a poll option. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2012, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deliver-bad-news-to-someone-on-their-vacation-or-not/625273/8 "2012-06-15T19:29:24Z")
This is why I don’t petsit. Eek. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2012, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deliver-bad-news-to-someone-on-their-vacation-or-not/625273/9 "2012-06-15T19:32:57Z")
Cat death on vacation anecdote, a favorite of my dad’s: > [@](#): > > A man who was completely devoted to his cat finally was pursuaded by his mom and brother to take a vacation, and get away from everything for a while. They promised to take good care of the cat while he was away, and urged him not to worry, but to enjoy himself. > > However 2 days into the vacation, he gets a call from his brother. > > Bro: I’m sorry about this, but I have some bad news > Man: It’s the cat, isn’t it? I knew it!! What is it, tell me about my cat! > Bro: Well, the cat’s dead, but… > Man: Oh no! How did it happen?? > Bro: Well, the cat was just dead when I got up this morning, but… > Man: Oh, how terrible! And how terrible to tell it to me just like that! You know how I loved my cat! You know how much he meant to me! How could you just dump that news on me?? You could have been more diplomatic about it! > Bro: What??? But… > Man: You could have broken it to me gently! You could have told me that the cat was stuck on the roof, and was having trouble getting down, but you were getting the ladder and would be making sure it was okay. Then tomorrow you could have called and told me that you got the cat okay, but he’d hurt his paw, and you’d be taking him to the vet. > Bro: yeah, but… > Man: Then the next day you could have told me the vet said everything looked fairly good, but the cat was being kept for observation, just to be sure! > Bro: Look, bro… > Man: Then the next day, you could tell me there were unexpected complications, but the vet was taking action and was still hopeful! > Bro: Do you really think… > Man: Finally, the next day you could have told me the cat had died! Then I would have gotten used to the idea, and come to some accomodation with it, and been able to accept it better. Not like this, not dropped on me with no warning!! > Bro: Okay, okay!! > Man: Understand now??? > Bro: Yes! > Man: Good. Maybe you’ll do better in the future. Now I need to settle down and work through this. By the way, how’s mom? > Bro: She’s stuck on the roof and is having trouble getting down. ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2012, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deliver-bad-news-to-someone-on-their-vacation-or-not/625273/10 "2012-06-15T19:42:41Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > You could always bury it before going on vacation: just to be on the safe side. Quite right, you don’t want to come back from Sorrento to a dead cat - it’s so anticlimactic. ---
**Author:** ![blondebear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blondebear/32/1022_2.png) [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2012, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deliver-bad-news-to-someone-on-their-vacation-or-not/625273/11 "2012-06-15T19:52:56Z")
I voted “depends on…” It depends on the person on vacation. Unless it’s really horrible news that needs some kind of immediate action, I don’t want to hear about it. OTOH, when my friend and I travel together, she is in constant contact with her friends and relatives who share every big and little drama going on in their lives. It’s a rare day when she doesn’t get upset by something going on back home in non-vacation land. ---
**Author:** ![Rachellelogram](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rachellelogram/32/8689_2.png) [@Rachellelogram](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rachellelogram)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2012, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deliver-bad-news-to-someone-on-their-vacation-or-not/625273/12 "2012-06-15T19:57:41Z")
Only if it involves the death of a human being. Otherwise, it can wait. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2012, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deliver-bad-news-to-someone-on-their-vacation-or-not/625273/13 "2012-06-15T20:14:10Z")
> [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](#): > > Cat death on vacation anecdote, a favorite of my dad’s: That’s funny! I love the urban legend about the dead rabbit. Dog owners move into a new neighborhood. They know that their neighbors have a pet rabbit. While the rabbit owners are on vacation, the dog owners notice that their dog is walking around with the rabbit, now dead, in it’s mouth. They don’t want the blame for the rabbit’s death, so they clean it up and put it back in its cage, hoping the neighbors will think that it died there. When the neighbors come home, they are asked how their trip was. “It was fine, but the strangest thing happened. Just before we left, our rabbit died, so we buried in the back yard…” ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2012, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deliver-bad-news-to-someone-on-their-vacation-or-not/625273/14 "2012-06-15T20:18:19Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > That’s funny! > > I love the urban legend about the dead rabbit. That one sounds more like it probably happened somewhere, somehow. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Barkis\_is\_Willin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a183cd/32.png) [@Barkis\_is\_Willin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Barkis_is_Willin)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2012, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deliver-bad-news-to-someone-on-their-vacation-or-not/625273/15 "2012-06-15T20:39:41Z")
> [@Taomist](#): > > Well…I’d want to wait, but what to do with the poor kitty in the meantime? Yeah, I’d tell right away because it seems way more weird to me to come home to no pet and hear that someone else took care of its body and everything. Some people might be weird about what they want done with the remains, so I’d want to find out their wishes. ---
**Author:** ![Kevbo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e47774/32.png) [@Kevbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kevbo)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2012, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deliver-bad-news-to-someone-on-their-vacation-or-not/625273/16 "2012-06-15T21:16:56Z")
I actually had something close happen. The pet owner was not on vacation, but working out of town. The elderly dog had a pancreatic tumor and was in a lot of pain. I was able to call the owner and convince her the dog needed to be put down, and no, it shouldn’t wait 'till she could get back to be there for it. I think this is the only time I can recall myself in uncontrollable, as in can’t breath right, tears as an adult. It was way, way worse than when I had to put my own dog down…also no picnic, mind. ---
**Author:** ![ENugent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/4af34b/32.png) [@ENugent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ENugent)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2012, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deliver-bad-news-to-someone-on-their-vacation-or-not/625273/17 "2012-06-15T21:20:50Z")
If they call and ask how the cat is doing, I tell, but otherwise, I wait for them to come home. Body is double-bagged and placed in the freezer. ---
**Author:** ![Ibanez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a4c791/32.png) [@Ibanez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ibanez)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2012, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deliver-bad-news-to-someone-on-their-vacation-or-not/625273/18 "2012-06-15T21:26:15Z")
I love cats, but they’re cats. I wrap it in a bag and stick it in the freezer, and tell them when they get back. ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2012, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deliver-bad-news-to-someone-on-their-vacation-or-not/625273/19 "2012-06-15T22:45:24Z")
I would want to be told. For me, a vacation is from routine, not from pain. ---
**Author:** ![sinjin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ebca7d/32.png) [@sinjin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sinjin)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2012, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deliver-bad-news-to-someone-on-their-vacation-or-not/625273/20 "2012-06-15T23:11:13Z")
Hahahha, we asked our neighbors to feed and water our two finches while we were away for 10 days. We came home and both of them were lying dead on the bottom of the cage:eek:, little feet sticking up in the air. They never said anything and we didn’t either, what do you say??? We moved away shortly and never saw them again. It made me a little nervous when we subsequently left our two kids with a different neighbor when we went on job interviews. Thankfully the kids were both still alive when we returned.🆒 We are still friends with the kid-sitters 30 years later. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/deliver-bad-news-to-someone-on-their-vacation-or-not/625273.md?page=2)